I was seventeen-years-old at the time. I was still new in the group. My friends were daredevils. I felt like I wasn’t good enough. I still had my old friends, but I was cutting ties with them quickly. A lot had happened in the last few years.

I was drinking in an illegal bar. A shady place where the most spoiled brats gather. It was a breeding ground for stupidity. It was my scapegoat. Or at least it was, until a girl, one year younger than me, approached me. She sat down next to me and ordered a small shot.

“Alchohol is bad for you.” I said jokingly.

“Oh really. Thanks for the advice Mr. Drowning-my-misery.” She replied sarcastically.

“Yeah, cheers.” I put my glass up high.

“You mind listening to my problems and I will listen to yours?”

“Go ahead.” That night we talked and talked about our troubles. It was pretty calming. More soothing than the shitty alcohol they served. Her name was Lizzie Stone. Sadly she had been a victim of suicide. I never thought I would hear that tender voice again until…

I woke up. I looked around me. I was lying down on an inflatable mattress, which wasn’t the comfiest mattress but it was something. I was on the rooftop of the abandoned building where Mike and I made the plan. But I couldn’t see Mike, only Liz was in my view. She was doing something on her phone while sitting on the old couch. I decided to talk to her.

“Hey, Liz.”

“Well, good morning, Jake.” I Looked around some more.

“Where’s Mike?” I continued to look around. Her expression became grim.

“He’s… He is dead, Jake.”

“What!?” I was shocked.

“He pleaded for your survival, and he succeeded… but it had to be a fair trade.” She looked down. I was mortified. I felt like I could throw up. I had to lie down for a few minutes.

After I began feeling better, I walked to the edge of the building. I stood there, the cold breeze hitting my face and the night sky shining down upon me. I didn’t want to believe Mike was gone. I remembered what God had told me. I remembered my mission. I had to save people. I had to stop suicides and stop massacres. I knew what to do.

I began running towards the stairs. Liz saw me and quickly followed.

“Where are we going?” She said while gasping for air.

“We need to stop a suicide.” I continued to run down the stairs. I didn’t remember who the person was, I just remembered the place and the time. I strangely remember things like that, yet I forget names quite easily. We finally got the bottom where Mike’s jeep was. Liz had taken the keys before Mike was killed. I took the keys from her, started the engine and took off. Liz was on the passenger seat.

We arrived at a factory. For me, it was very familiar. It was the beginning of my journey. It was the place where I died. But that didn’t matter, because it wasn’t my turn. I remembered there was a guy who jumped from here. I looked up towards the roof and sure enough, he was climbing the same ladder that I did. I climbed after him. I was climbing when suddenly I looked down. The view… it made my body stop moving. I froze. I guess I had PTSD because I could not move. I looked up and the guy had already reached the top. I concentrated on my goal and finally, my body began moving. I didn’t look down, I only looked up. I got to the top.

The guy was at the edge. He had his arms raised and ready to do it. I yelled at him.

“Stop!” he turned around and looked at me. It was my childhood friend, Creed. He had short dark hair and he was a really fit. He used to be a fighter but after his family passed away, he gave up. I used to look up to him, but slowly we drifted apart. He was an important part of my childhood and just the thought of me forgetting about his suicide was sickening. I was truly disappointed in myself.

“Jake? I thought you had forgotten about me!”

“Why would I!? You are my best friend!” I felt guilty about saying that. At least Creed moved away from the edge. I went and hugged him.

“What’s wrong, bud?” He began crying.

“So much… So much has gone wrong, Jake.”

“Tell me everything.”

Creed told me everything. His story was really sad. I couldn’t leave him alone. I decided to take him with us to my house. He talked with Liz too and they became really good friends. When we arrived at my house, I told him about everything. Our goal, the reincarnation, Mike. After that, I asked him one simple question.

“Will you help?” Creed looked me straight in the eyes as he said.

“Of course.” He said without skipping a beat. I told them to catch up on some sleep as we will look around the city for people to save. I also went to bed as I had been pretty tired. It was a Sunday so I could go to school tomorrow and be on the look-out there. I soon began to fall asleep.

I woke up in an unusual place. It wasn’t anywhere I’ve been before. It looked like a giant library. It had shelves upon shelves. There were a lot of horizontal rows, but each had 12 vertical rows. On the top were nameplates with numbers. From left to right, the ones in front of me were numbered ‘2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021’. I realized those were years and the 12 vertical rows were months. I reached for December 2014 and pulled it out. I opened it up and inside were the names, places, reasons and times of death of all the people who’ve died. It was sorted by city, so it was pretty easy to navigate. I realized that I could use this to save more people.

With this, I knew that my plan was set in action. A plan to achieve a different goal than what I had in mind. I had to save as many people as possible. I had to become a messiah for all the people that have had their lives taken away. I had to save as many people as I can so I could kill God.