《I Accidentally Stole a God》Awakening
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“What?!” It didn’t take long before a profligate broke the silence.
“Why are we being told to leave after waiting here all this time?!”
The old man’s expression didn’t change.
“You were asked to wait here until further instruction. Had I shown up while you fools were asleep, would you have expected me to wait for you to wake up? The Blue Moon Sect has no use for insolent disciples.”
The old man had just revealed vital information to those who didn’t know the true purpose of this place. Naturally, Song Yi picked up on it. Before having time to reflect further, a girl who had just failed the examination spoke out. She was tall and well-dressed, holding a refined air about her.
The girl dug her fingernails into her palms with almost enough force to draw blood. “What qualifies you to make all of us wait for an entire day?”
When she said those words, the old man’s facial expression changed for the first time, contorting into a vicious snarl.
“You will respect your elders!”
He extended a wrinkled hand and, despite the fact that he stood no less than thirty meters away from the girl, she suddenly crumpled as she was blown back by an invisible force. She couldn’t stop until she slammed with a horrifying crunch into the wall of the pagoda.
Other than the sound of her moaning in pain as she clutched her stomach, the room had fallen completely silent. The girl held no shred of the dignity or pride she had before.
“Well then, now that that interruption is dealt with, I suppose we should move on. The rest of you, follow me.” He paused just as he was about to turn around, before saying, “oh, I forgot to introduce myself. I am Mo Yijun, the Ninth Elder of the Blue Moon Sect.”
Without further ado, Elder Mo walked back outside the pagoda, not bothering to turn to see if people were following him or not. Of course, all of those who had remained sitting until that point quickly made to follow.
On the way out, as the Third Prince walked past the profligate who had shot him a dirty glance earlier, he patted him on the shoulder and laughed out loud.
“Don’t worry so much,” he said. “At least after you leave you won’t remember how embarrassing you are.”
On the way to the pagoda, Song Yi had seen many vast fields of greenery, thick forests and mountains. The walk alone had taken him around a half hour down a straight stone path. Following Elder Mo, however, they quickly branched off onto a path that he hadn’t seen the first time he made the walk. He wasn’t sure if, in his previous haste, he had missed it, or if there were something else at work.
The group walked for a while in silence before someone decided to speak up. It was the Third Prince again.
“Respected Elder, may I ask where we’re going?”
“To the Blue Moon Sect.”
“Does this make us disciples, like Respected Elder mentioned earlier?” This time it a young man with unremarkable features who spoke.
“You pass the simplest test and now you think yourself worthy of the title disciple?”
Those words silenced the crowd for a moment, but the Third Prince decided to ask one more question.
“There are more tests, then?”
“Naturally. Now, stop with the questions. I don’t like noisy brats.”
With a grin, the prince stopped talking, seemingly unfazed by the insult.
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While his words may have seemed impatient, inwardly, Elder Mo was quite pleased with this candidate. By his assessment, the prince most likely had the highest potential out of the entire group. For now, it was just a gut feeling, but he would soon find out.
Eventually, the group came to the bottom of a sheer grey cliff face that stretched up until it could no longer be seen beyond the clouds. Further ahead, the path they stood on split into twenty different routes, each leading to a separate hole at the base of the cliff. When attempting to look further into the any of the holes, the group could see nothing but pitch black.
To the right of the group was a longhouse built out of simple wood timber, roofed with thatch. To their left, a forest.
“There are forty-two of you remaining… A smaller number than usual it seems.” Elder Mo sighed. “You’ll pair off into groups of two and go there to sleep for the rest of the day. Come nightfall, you will assemble here once more.”
The forty-two immediately went about rearranging themselves. Su Bai and Song Yi naturally formed a pairing. Similarly, the only six remaining profligates who hadn’t been disqualified by the first test formed three separate groups. To everyone’s surprise, the Third Prince, who had stood out thus far, decided to pair with a snivelling boy, no older than fourteen, who had looked nervous even during the first exam. A few pitying looks were cast towards the boy who, now that he had been singled out by the domineering prince, looked completely terrified. As for the unremarkable boy who had spoken up earlier, he paired with an equally unremarkable looking girl. Both of them, as well as a few others in the crowd, wore ragged clothes similar to Song Yi’s.
After people chose a partner, they walked into the longhouse to find a series of rooms awaiting them. Each room had two beds, as well as two small meals of vegetable soup and rice.
After entering their room, Song Yi and Su Bai wolfed down their separate meals in silence. Both were too exhausted by this point to spare any energy on chatting. After finishing her meal, Su Bai flopped down onto her bed.
“See you tonight,” she said.
“Sleep well.”
Instead of going to sleep immediately, despite how his eyelids dragged, Song Yi pulled out the book that he had stolen only a day ago. Of course, after everything that had happened, it felt more like a week ago. For the first time, he clearly saw the silver print on the front: Unlocking Karma: Puzzles and Profundities.
It was an esoteric title. Or at least, it would be if Song Yi knew how to read.
Regardless of his illiteracy, Song Yi decided to open up the book. He didn’t want to ask for help, even from Su Bai. This book was important enough for him to risk his life on, and despite his burgeoning friendship with Su Bai, he didn’t yet trust her with his life. As for anyone else, there was no one else.
He flipped through the pages until he reached a section with something written in the margins. There was an image scribbled, along with some writing beneath it. The image depicted a needle being pushed into an acupoint in the center of a human’s forehead. As for the writing below, Song Yi could only recognize a few basic characters. He did, however, notice the characters for “strong.”
Fishing around in the bag, he retrieved the silver needle that, he figured, was the one shown in the illustration. After a moment of deliberation, Song Yi tentatively inserted the needle into the indicated acupoint. Slowly, the needle pierced his skin.
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SHLUCK
A terrifying force slammed into his head, knocking him back onto the bed and rattling his brain. He covered his mouth with both hands and, with every scrap of willpower he possessed, tried not to scream from the agony firing through his head. Fortunately for him, it was only a few seconds before his mind succumbed to the pain and exhaustion, and he passed out.
Moments later, a turbid breath of air escaped Song Yi’s lips, his eyes snapping back open.
“Free at last…” he said softly.
But when he spoke, it was not with the voice of Song Yi. It was an earthy, archaic voice that would put the Blue Moon Sect’s Ninth Elder to shame. His face spread into a victorious grin as he looked at his hands.
“It’s a bit of a shame that the body is so small, but that can be fixed later on.”
He closed his eyes and breathed in, attempting to direct the flow of qi through his meridians, but…
“M-mortal?” he shouted out loud.
Su Bai, who had been sleeping nearby, woke up with a shock.
“What? What’s going on?”
“Uh… nothing, sorry to bother you.”
“Hey, you sound kinda weird. Are you alright?”
He cleared his throat. “Ah, my throat hasn’t been feeling great.”
“Oh. Try to get some sleep, there’s nothing we can do about it until after this exam.” Near the end of her sentence she began to trail off as she once again fell asleep.
Song Yi, or whoever it was in his body, felt like weeping.
“Tens of thousands of years. I’ve waited tens of thousands of years just to end up in a mortal body once again?”
He took in a deep breath, careful not to disturb the sleeping Su Bai nearby. When he focused inward, what he found made him even more miserable.
“If it were an empty body, then maybe I could accept it… But what the hell is going on here?!”
Looking down, he saw the silver-lined book in his lap, coming to understand.
“This guy… he didn’t read the instructions?”
He chuckled a low, hollow chuckle, holding his head in his hands. After a moment, the look in his eyes went blank, and Song Yi’s body fell back onto the bed, unconscious.
~~~~~~~~~~
A splitting headache was what woke Song Yi up only a few hours later. Trying to remember what had happened after Su Bai went to sleep led him nowhere, but when he noticed the silver-lined book in his lap, he quickly shoved it back into his bag. To his dismay, however, no matter how he searched the room he couldn’t find the silver needle.
Eventually, cursing himself, he had no choice but to resign himself to his loss and wake up Su Bai. During the night while they slept, somebody had brought more food for them, leaving it where lunch had been left previously. This time it was egg and chicken on rice. Between mouthfuls, Su Bai asked,
“Is your throat still sore?”
Song Yi made an “mmm” sound to test.
“Actually yeah… it is.”
“I hope you feel better,” she said simply as she finished her meal.
Song Yi was bewildered, wondering how she’d known even before he had that he wasn’t feeling well.
After eating and preparing, they went out to see the sun setting behind the gigantic cliff face. Elder Mo was still standing where he had been earlier, almost as though he hadn’t moved. The only difference was that now, there was a small table next to him that housed an array of books. That, and a large rock beside it on the ground that hadn’t been there previously.
When all the youths assembled, Elder Mo spoke.
“Welcome to the second examination. Your task is simple. Every individual will take a book from these at my side. After which you will have twelve hours to prepare. Then, with your partner from before, you will make your way to the top of this cliff within the next month.”
The group craned their necks to look up at the cliff top, now visible through a hole in the clouds thousands of meters above them.
“Some of you entered this sect without knowing what it was. Out of those who participate in this test, some will die. I am not unreasonable. Therefore, any of you may choose to leave the examination at this point. But, once you decide to stay, there will be no going back.”
As though to illustrate his point, Elder Mo picked up the head-sized rock that had been sitting at his feet, and effortlessly chucked it into the nearest cave entrance. With a heavy THUNK, it landed inside.
ROAAAAAAAR!!!
The monstrous, blood-curdling cry caused some of the group to fall back a step.
Elder Mo’s words before hadn’t fazed them much, but that roar was another story entirely. Terrified looks appeared on faces in the crowd. The wimpy boy who was paired with the Third Prince looked as though he might puke. Even the Third Prince couldn’t keep his usual cocky smirk on his face. Instead, his lips were pursed in a grim line, brows furrowed.
“So?” Elder Mo said nonchalantly.
Over half the group bowed towards Elder Mo, then turned to walk back the way they’d come. This group included all the remaining profligates, who valued their lives far more than this enigmatic examination. Song Yi and Su Bai, after exchanging a look, decided to stay. Su Bai’s conviction surprised Song Yi. He’d underestimated just how important this exam was to her.
In addition to them, the unremarkable-looking pair had also stayed, though they looked unsure of themselves. The rest who stayed were mostly those who had nothing to live for back where they came from, but many had lost a partner. To everyone’s surprise, the Third Prince’s partner — who by now had lost his breakfast — hadn’t turned to leave. Even Elder Mo gave the youth an approving look, before clearing his throat.
“Those of you who no longer have a partner, please find a new one. Now, the forest to my right possesses good fortune for any of you who intend to live through this trial. As I said before, you have half a day. You may grab your books now.”
~~~~~~~~~~
The woods that the examinees had been told to enter looked ordinary from the outside. The only remarkable-looking thing about it was that the trees looked much larger and thicker than one would expect.
From the inside, however, it was teeming with life. On the ground alone were hundreds of varieties of plants that most of those still participating in the exam had never seen before. The whole group stalled near the entrance, stunned by the amount that they could see even during the darkness of night. A host of strange clicking sounds and bird-songs entered their ears. They experienced new intoxicating fragrances for the first time.
One boy, who looked to be age sixteen or so, accidentally brushed up against a large white flower while walking. The flower had nineteen petals, each the size of an adult male’s hand, of which the boy touched only one. The moment he did, he began to scream as blood flowed out from the corners of his eyes, and his hair began to turn white at the roots. He immediately moved away, which stopped the bleeding, but his hair had turned completely white.
After that incident, every person slowed down significantly. Whenever one of them got the urge to run off in any direction, the sounds of the white-haired boy’s choked sobs reigned their wanderlust back.
Not all of the plants were harmful, though. Those white flowers were rare, but one could find on most trees a type of five-coloured moss that gave off a small bit of light around it. When anyone touched the moss, it began to pulse, as though with a heartbeat, becoming brighter. After a few seconds though, it lost its light completely. If left alone, the light seemed to come back after a few minutes. Benign plants such as these were common, and the exploring youths began to learn what was safe and what wasn’t in this mysterious forest. Still, the experience was utterly surreal, and most of those present still exercised caution in their discovery.
Soon after, Song Yi and Su Bai had travelled deeper into the forest without suffering anything more than a few scrapes from bushwhacking. A few times they had come across animals, which happened to be just as bizarre in appearance as they sounded from afar, but none had been any larger than an ordinary housecat. With that in mind, Song Yi came to a decision.
“We should split up. It doesn’t seem that anything here is too dangerous if you aren’t reckless. We’ll meet back at the entrance at dawn.”
Su Bai nodded. “Keep on the lookout for anything to use as a weapon if we run into a monster like the one we heard earlier.”
Song Yi had a thought that had been on his mind since that event.
“Why didn’t you head back home after hearing that thing?”
“It’s a long story. Why didn’t you?”
“It’s also a long story, but if I went back, I would die.”
Su Bai paused for a moment to look Song Yi in the eyes before she spoke again.
“Tell me about it sometime.”
He nodded, and they went their separate ways.
~~~~~~~~~~
Long after she could no longer hear Song Yi moving through the bushes, Su Bai came across a small pond with pure white reeds. In the middle of these reeds, only a few meters away from her, was a frog that glowed with a warm golden light.
Croak… croak… croak…
The frog was incredibly quick as it hopped around. If one weren’t paying close attention, they would lose track of it. Eventually, though, it alighted on a patch of five-coloured moss that was only two arm-lengths from Su Bai, coming to a temporary stop.
After a moment of hesitation, Su Bai threw caution to the wind and dived for the frog, hands outstretched.
“Got it!” she cried as her hands wrapped around it.
Her smiling face froze when she felt how slimy the frog’s skin was. The sensation was accompanied by a soft pop as the critter slipped out of her grasp.
Croak!
She slammed her fist into the ground.
“This damn toad!”
“This little guy?” a young man’s voice asked.
When Su Bai looked up to see who’d spoken, the face that greeted her was the last she’d wanted to see — The Third Prince. He held up an expensive-looking sack made of red silk, through which could be seen a golden glow in the shape of a frog.
She immediately backed up.
“Third Prince I-”
“My name is Zhang Bo.”
“Prince Zhang. I apologize, I didn’t know you were nearby.”
“Your name?”
“Su Bai.”
He tossed her the bag, not caring at all about how much it might’ve cost. “Little Su, you’ll be needing this. Good luck.”
Without waiting for her response he turned and left, leaving a nervous and confused Su Bai sitting on the ground in the underbrush.
Only a few kilometres away, Song Yi sat on a rock in a clearing, staring at two books which he’d placed in front of him. On the left was a book bound in a rough mottled brown and red beast-skin which had a leathery smell to it. On the right was the silver-lined ‘Unlocking Karma.’
While his earlier suggestion to split up had been for the purpose of covering more area, part of his intention had been to use the alone time to study these books and see if there were any illustrations he could glean anything from. Of course, he checked his holding sack one more time for the silver needle, but to no avail.
Song Yi’s brow was furrowed as he examined the tomes. The brown-red book was titled “Blazing Desert Minor Art,” which seemed to be a strange title. What was even more strange, however, was the fact that Song Yi… could read it! Even the pages within, which spoke of an execution method for a type of leg art, were all completely understandable. At least, the words themselves were. The explanations in the book were a mess, and would not be easy to make sense of in a short period of time.
Of course, Song Yi was less concerned with the contents and more with his sudden literacy. He thought back to his experience in the forest, wondering if he had encountered by accident any plants that may have had this kind of effect. As he sank into contemplation, a sudden voice erupted in his mind.
“You really are an idiot, aren’t you?”
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