There were no robed figures wandering or sitting around the temple grounds this time. LN and Raey found themselves quite alone at the top of the stairs, not even a guard in sight.

"Should we go inside?"

LN glanced over at Raey, unsurprised by his sudden instinct to whisper. It did feel like they were intruding on something, but she reminded herself that they had been invited. If there was some rule against going into the temple, then there would be guards present to stop them... right?

"We might find someone to give us directions," she said slowly, looking around the grounds again in the hopes someone might wander helpfully into view. No such luck.

"We could just go in the awesome Jedi temple," Raey suggested again, and this time LN caught the note of excitement he was trying, and failing, to keep under control. She looked at him, a newly-scrubbed scavenger practically bouncing on his toes with excitement, his brown hair hanging well past his shoulders (the absolute disgrace) and bright eyes that-

She had to look again. She had never actually examined Raey's eyes in the sunlight. On the Domination, on the shuttle, and in shadow they had appeared dark brown, but now in the unfiltered sunlight she realized he actually had flecks of gold in the middle of his irises. They shone brightly in the daylight, just like the paler highlights in his hair that had been covered up by dirt and grease until today...

LN jerked her thoughts back to the business at hand, somewhat irritated at herself for getting distracted. Raey was clearly over-eager, but she also had no other ideas. Entering a strange stone structure wasn't something she was comfortable doing without her blaster, but the hospital had confiscated all weapons and then refused to give them back until "you are both properly discharged."

It sounded like a precursor to execution, but LN could admit to herself that that was probably just First Order mentality making her nervous for no reason. Still, she hesitated.

And the problem was solved for them. Out of the dark entry arch, the white-clad figure of Princess Leia appeared. She beckoned them over to her, then turned aside and began walking out into the temple lawn. Raey, like a hound puppy, took off to follow suit.

What must it be like, LN wondered, to have a hero?

.

.

The room was pitch black. There were no lights that could be turned on and no wires running with electricity through the walls. The walls were solid, reflective black, unbroken by vent or seam but scarred with burns. It was a chamber disconnected from the rest of the ship, isolated by empty corridors no soldiers or crew-members had ever walked.

The Knight knelt in the darkness, his head held high and his eyes closed. His helmet sat on the floor in front of him - his lightsaber lay deactivated across his knees. There was no air being pumped into the room after the door was closed, and his breathing, his heartbeat, had slowed as a result. Slowly descending from consciousness, he waited in the darkness.

.

.

"Sit with me for a moment."

LN tried to protest. "This planet is in danger, your highness. An acolyte of the Knights of Ren followed us-"

"I know, I know, but here on New Alderaan we have a little tradition for the morning. It is past morning now, but it still may be helpful to you. Come, just sit quietly with me."

Raey ran a hand through the grass as he sat, rubbing the blades between his fingers. LN hesitated for a moment before following suit. Grass had a nasty habit of leaving green stains on a uniform, and on these pale clothes the stains would be difficult to hide...

Focus, LN, she commanded herself. This isn't the First Order. They won't punish you for grass stains.

"Close your eyes," ordered the princess, though not in the same way any of LN's old officers would have. It almost sounded more like a suggestion then a command.

LN closed her eyes, feeling strange and foolish. Sitting in the grass with closed eyes like a child playing games--

"Relax, LN. You are making Raey tense."

"No, she's not," protested Raey, practically at the same moment LN insisted,

"I do not need to relax."

Leia was not persuaded. "There is a connection between all living things, LN, and that connection is able to transmit one person's unease to unsettle those around them. You are tense, and though he may not realize it, that tension is spreading to Raey. Trust me. Relax."

LN let out a frustrated breath, then forced herself to do as the princess demanded. It took conscious effort to make every limb go limp, and even then she could not bring herself to let her shoulders sag, but her attempt to obey seemed to appease Leia.

"That's good. Try to fill your lungs with every breath in, and then let it go gently. Slowly."

"What is the purpose of this?" LN asked abruptly, opening her eyes to fix Leia with an unhappy look. The princess seemed to anticipate her – she opened her eyes a heartbeat after LN and met her gaze steadily.

"My people are in a vulnerable place here," she replied calmly. "This world is wild, our civilization is young again in an old galaxy, and the First Order is actively looking to destroy us. These things inspire a great deal of fear in people. I have taught every man and woman in this city this same technique, a preventative measure against fear. "

"By breathing?" piped up Raey. Leia smiled.

"Yes, but that is just the first part. Now, LN, will you rejoin Raey and I?"

.

.

The air became thin. The darkness began to shift, a dizziness that created the illusion of movement where there was none.

The Knight waited, still and silent, allowing the slow suffocation to set in. He could still feel the groove under his knee, the gash in the floor where a session had ended in violence. In his desperate desire to survive, he had tried to carve these walls into pieces... but they would not be defeated. Beyond the layer of mirrored black, an alloy stronger then light resisted his blows.

Wasted anger. Wasted fear.

His lungs cried out for fresh air, and he let them suffer. His shoulders slumped, his chin fell towards his chest.

His fingers tightened around the hilt of his lightsaber.

.

.

"There is a connection," repeated Leia, "between all living things. It is... energy, but not the kind of energy that powers your blaster or burns in the stars. Those are solitary energies, but the Force is united."

The Force...

Raey felt his fingers trembling and curled them into fists. The Force. Everyone had heard the stories, but it wasn't a story anymore. This was Jedi magic explained by the lips of the Rebel Princess herself.

"It lives inside us, in our blood and deeper, and it is the same everywhere. It is the same Force that lives in you, LN, that lives in Raey, and the same Force in me that lives in every plant beneath your fingers, Raey. Some living things have a very weak connection, like the grass, and some have an extraordinarily strong connection. The people with those strong connections, they can become what the galaxy knows as Jedi, or Sith."

Like you.

"Like me," said Leia, almost as if she was responding to Raey's thought. "And yet the Force is not limited to those with that strong connection. It is open to all. Not everyone will be able to lift rocks with the Force, but we can all let that connection to the people around us strengthen our hearts."

Was LN trembling, too? Raey felt the sudden urge to open his eyes and see if she was alright, but he didn't want to disappoint Princess Leia.

"On New Alderaan, we mediate for just a few minutes in the morning to remind ourselves of that connection. The shared bond we have with our friends, our strangers, and even our enemies. The value of each and every one of the people around us, whatever we might think of them. Through the Force, we can see the meaning in every, seemingly insignificant life."

LN broke the silence. Raey's eyes snapped open as she bolted to her feet and took off across the lawn, running towards the edge of the temple grounds. He began to rise, to go after her, but Leia put a surprisingly strong hand on his shoulder.

"Go into the temple, find Ar'tak," she said. Her tone left no room for disobedience.

"What should I tell him?"

"Nothing. Go."

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.

It was a narrow line, the edge of death. It was a line he had learned to walk, slowly and painfully. On that edge, teetering between the realms of shackled and unshackled Force, they could speak.

.

.

LN bent over the roots of a tree, one hand pressed against the trunk and the other clutching her churning stomach. She did not hear Leia approach over the pounding in her ears, but she heard the question.

"Do you know what's wrong?"

"Everything," whispered LN, then spit a sour taste among the roots. "Everything is wrong."

"How do you know?"

LN looked up, met the princess's gaze. She couldn't keep it up for long and turned back to her tree.

"It... everything you said. It's just pretty words, right? Mystic mumbojumbo. Nonsense." Leia didn't interrupt her, didn't hasten to correct her. LN wished she had – it would have spared her the need to finish her thought. Her voice began to tremble as she continued. "It's... the opposite of everything we ever learned. We are stormtroopers. We follow the orders of people who, by their nature, are better then us. We fight so other people, who matter more, don't have to. We are so worthless, so expendable, that we are barely worth keeping alive for long enough to die."

Silence. Forcing her to speak. She hated how her voice cracked and wobbled.

"But I felt it. You said I was making Raey tense, but you were calm. He was calm. That made it easier for me to be calm. And at the end... it hit me."

Leia didn't say anything. She just stood there, watching LN, and LN felt that air of absolute calm that seemed to follow the princess around trying to reach her even now.

"I could feel you were right," she continued, and her insides twisted again despite Leia's presence. "But if you are right, then... then..."

The tree bark began to swim. LN blinked, too distressed to even try to stop the hot tears that spilled down her cheeks. It was against every protocol, every rule she had ever learned, but she didn't care. She leaned her forehead against the tree, her entire body shaking.

A hand, gentle but firm, slid across her slumping shoulders. She found herself turning away from the tree, almost falling into the steady embrace of a woman far older then she seemed.

"If you're right," LN wailed, not caring who heard or what they thought of her, "then I really did abandon them all. I saved myself and left them behind to a life worse then death!"

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Step.

Step.

Step.

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