《Ben the Dungeon》Chapter 5
Advertisement
We had walked for roughly 37 minutes and 13 seconds and had crushed, stepped on or incinerated 5 DireRats when the notifications came.
-- An adventurer (Eilnys of Many Talents - Level ??? Class ???) has entered! -- -- An adventurer (Zinnaella Harpsorcerer - Level ??? Class ???) has entered! -- -- An adventurer (Ghost Mamba Steve - Level ??? Class ???) has entered! --
This was initially a welcome reprieve from the High Mage's absent-minded and incredibly tuneless humming that bludgeoned into my skull as he performed what he seemed to find as the relatively mundane task of elephant-sized rodent extermination (or maybe normal-sized? My sense of scale had become a bit confused over the course of events). At the same time I had kind of thought that there was going to be bit of a moratorium on adventurers while Terendrian classified me so I decided to raise this with him.
"WooOOooop. WoooOOOoop. Intruder Alert. Intruder Alert. Please be on the lookout for Eilnys of Many Talents, Zinnaella Harpsorcerer and Ghost Mamba Steve. Level Unknown. Class Unknown. WooOOooop. WoooOOOoop. Intruder Alert. Intruder Alert."
"Confounding Zounderkites, that blasted Duke has sent in Assassins again. Why he feels the infernal need to double-check my work, I do not know!" Terendrian stomped back down the passage towards the entrance chamber "Well I'm not bloody having it! I'm going to give them a piece of my bloody mind this time"
I sighed with relief to have a few moments to myself before awkwardly following along behind him.
What kind of name is Harpsorcerer? That's just random fantasy words shoved together...
For all that she was an assassin, Eilnys never really considered herself to be a particularly bad person. She just provided a necessary service.
And sure she was often vague about the nature of that service when she discussed it with her mum at Sunday lunch, but she had her code and had really just chosen a profession where she could sleep in and didn't have to speak to people much.
Advertisement
It was even on her business cards:
"No Children, No Cripples, No one under Level 30, No Mornings and No fucking Talking, now Fuck off."
Admittedly it wouldn't have been the best sales technique in a lot of businesses, but people like the Duke didn't really hire her for her kindly demeanour, so generally it worked out.
This was not one of those occasions and the reason for that was named "Zinnaella fucking Harpsorcerer". How in the Seven Hells you could be an assassin who talked all the fucking time, Eilnys didn't know, but she dearly wished the Guard had caught and hung Zinnaella a long time ago and was, by this point, very much considering knocking her out and hand-delivering her to them herself once the job was done.
As it was, one of her "Many Talents" was scouting ahead and so she did that for the moment instead. She could almost feel sorry for Steve who was at least a mute, but he was also a complete fucking psychopath so it was possible just some God's form of Karma.
And besides maybe if she left them alone together long enough the Death of Killers would do what Eilnys herself wouldn't, without getting paid at least.
Still she was very much enjoying the NeoIndustrial decor, which was at least a bit of change to the normal medieval doom and gloom Dungeons she normally had to check out. Maybe she would bring home a nice souvenir for her mum this time. Something nice and bright to put on the mantle instead of another fucking skull.
Hopefully at the very least she would get to wind up that poncy wizzard again.
Ghost Mamba Steve was in fact currently considering slitting Zinnaella's throat ear to ear and then chasing down Eilnys with pliers and a pair of chopsticks and forcing her to eat her own fingernails for abandoning him.
Advertisement
There was something about Zinnaella's voice that just never ever faded into the background and in the name of dear Bilous, did the woman continue to talk regardless of the appropriateness of the situation.
Like the job they did on the Earl of Marthwaite's widow during the Earl's funeral.
It was supposed to be fun, stealthy and easy, and while sure it ended in a complete bloodbath, Steve couldn't help but feel that the fact he'd had to kill all six of the pallbearers simply because they had tried to escort them out when someone kept talking over the priest during the ceremonies lacked a certain professionalism.
And even now, in Steve's happy place, a Dungeon that hopefully would provide endless numbers of creatures kill, she was still talking. And yet somehow still hadn't gotten to the point. Ever. In the entire time that he's known her.
No, Steve was definitely going to kill her.
He just needed to figure out a way to do it without her making any noise and spoiling it.
“And at the age of 6 they called me a prodigy, never had they seen an individual with such an amazing vocabulary and such eloquence of thought at such an early age, now obviously by this point Monsieur Mamba you know me well enough to know that I'm not saying that just to flatter myself, rarely you will find an individual more humble than myself, but my point is that that configuration of pipe reminds me of the maintenance section of the east wing of the museum of Extraordinary Art and Recreation which was in fact I think the place where they remarked...”
Zinnaella continued to scream endlessly inside her head, but as ever what escaped her lips was absolute drivel.
At least the job gave her an outlet from the rage that being trapped eternally inside her own head left her with. It was part of the reason she got on so well with Steve, the family curse made her little more than a mute with extra noise.
It's not even like her name was Harpsorcerer, that was a brand left by the moronic originator of the curse so that her family would always know who had cursed their line and the heinous actions that had been committed to deserve The Curse of Endless Chatter.
The irony of all this was that the curse stopped the bearer from mentioning anything about it, so of course the reasons for any of this were now long forgotten.
Still she kept up hope, like she always did, that this would be the Dungeon where she could find some kind of cure and finally let Steve know how she felt.
Advertisement
ICOMO ODYSSEY
Jonathan Vélo never expected to be famous. Not for riding his bike all the way around the continent of Icomo. Every adult knows his story, and children learn about him at school. This, however, is the first and only biography written about that great man with foreigners in mind. We, his biographers, imagine they will be immensely grateful. Of course, readers will find the people of Icomo an unusual sort for glorifying a young man who did nothing more than quit his job and ride his bike from town to town, city to city… But in an age of robots and computers, when little escapes the notice of the historian, there is a quiet epic to be told. It is the epic of cozy nights in a tent below the stars, of warm wind and ocean waves. It is also the epic of missing old friends in faraway places, and that feeling of needing to make life mean something. *** ‘ICOMO ODYSSEY’ is a nostalgic slice-of-life adventure about a utopian sci-fi land. No clever villains or epic fights here. Just cozy pleasures, charming towns and villages, interesting cultures, and the people who live in them… This story will update bi-weekly on Friday and Saturday. https://www.scribblehub.com/series/467210/icomo-odyssey/
8 134The Tale of Gael
For a boy who grew up on a farm Gael had rather big dreams of studying and travelling the country. Time and misfortune made those dreams stay unfulfilled. Now a lifetime later, after his mother had died Gael leaves the family farm. His journey has only just begun. --- The Tale of Gael Wiki
8 137Fate/Survivor
Die...I was going to die of hunger. Until a strange blonde girl rescued me or more like she summoned me out of thin air. I didn't have any idea of what was happening but the girl said to me that I was dragged in as a servant for a war for something called a Holy Grail. An omnipotent wish granting grail. I don't know why but this feels...So familiar. The story takes place in an alternate Fate Universe.
8 212Human Resources
8 149Quotes
Hanya rangkaian kata-kata yg menjadi cerita
8 191Shades Of Red | RaNnett
Razor tries to learn some English from his mentor from Mondstadt, Lisa, which assigns him some homework. Razor seeks his friend's (and crush's), Bennett's guidance, but not directly. While hanging out with Bennett, Razor finds what he needs to complete his homework and a little bit more than that...
8 59