As the night passed and dawn broke, Lydia couldn’t have felt more sluggish. Not tired, as if she needed sleep, simply a lightheaded, draining feeling that made her groan under her breath with each simple movement.

Either way, she managed to make it to the bathroom, and she was glad that she had one of the two rooms closest to it. The bathroom itself was simpler in design, with its black-and-white patterned tile and porcelain fixtures, but still enough to remind one that it belonged to a nobleman’s manor.

In here, Lydia glared at herself in the mirror. She was paler than usual, which she thought to be impossible, and her hair was a frizzy mess.

I really will be mad if I…

She suddenly blinked hard, but on second glance, realized that she had something she either didn’t notice or forgot about until now.

After last night, whoever the person she found was, she had been left with four deep gashes on her forearm. She thought it was just a minor scratch at first; she didn’t feel or see much because of the panic. But now, she saw that some spots were still bloody, and seemed rather severe.

I can’t let the others see this, though.

Lydia fumbled through the nearby shelves until she found a small roll of bandages. She then patched up her arm, and pulled down her sleeves to hide the evidence. Afterwards, she tidied up her appearance to where she didn’t look like an insomniac madwoman.

As she left the bathroom, however, she saw someone all too familiar in the hallway.

Hinata was talking with the butler, Jonathan, in the main room. The strange doctor was wearing her typical eyesore fashion; today, it was a dark violet dress with vibrant red drapes, a white ribbon at the waist, and another red stripe up the waist and bodice.

Lydia’s eyes narrowed. It’s hard to even look at her...But I wonder how much information she could let slip about last night’s scuffle, or anything in general.

Instead of waiting for them to finish, Lydia walked up to them immediately. As soon as Hinata noticed, however, she excused Jonathan, who unlocked the gate and continued upstairs.

Hinata spoke as happily as ever, “Good morning, Lydia! How are you faring?”

“Fine,” Lydia blankly replied. “Although, if you have a moment, I would like to have a word with you.”

“Of course,” said Hinata.

Careful what you say… Lydia crossed her arms. “You said the upstairs pipes with squeal occasionally, yes?”

Hinata looked unamused. “Try every day, and then some. I admit, it’s gotten better, but you’ll still hear it every now and again. Why do you ask, though?”

“Something I heard last night,” Lydia remarked. “I woke up to use the restroom, but then I heard this very strange sound. It wasn’t a squeak, it was more similar to hysterical screaming. Is everything alright, up there?”

Hinata looked uneasy for just a moment; hardly noticeable, but Lydia was searching her every movement and expression.

“I’m afraid I can’t provide an answer,” Hinata remarked. “I never heard anything last night. The only thing I can think of is if a patient was having a bad nightmare, but that hasn’t happened in a long time, and would’ve caused more of a commotion. In other words, with all due respect, I think it may have just been the night playing tricks on your senses. Or you had a bad dream?”

She’s good, Lydia thought to herself. “If I may ask further, what is on the third floor that’s so important to keep hidden? It’s just that all the strange noises come from up there, so it’s not hard to link two and two together.”

Hinata looked embarrassed. “Well, I probably seem like a criminal for that. I assure you, the fact that the third floor is blocked off and the strange noises are not linked. Coincidence, more like. The third floor is blocked off so that none of the patients gets too curious and tries to pester Victor, or rummage around our respected personal spaces.”

“Only you and Lord Victor live up there, then?”

“Yes, it’s just me and my father.” She chuckled, “Well, us and an old cat, but she likes to hide in ‘her’ proclaimed room. Other than that, there’s nothing anybody would even want to explore.”

Dammit! Lydia mentally screamed, Just tell me who the hell it was that clawed me!

“Is that all?” Hinata inquired.

Lydia tilted her head. “One more thing. Why does Lord Victor feel the need to hide constantly?”

Hinata seemed more solemn. “Honestly, I’d rather not say all of that story. The gist is that my father has had a very, very horrible depression. I know that sounds far-fetched, but he simply doesn’t care enough about anything, anymore. You see, ever since he lost his wife…” She sighed, “That’s a long story, though. Why don’t we just leave the reason at ‘he enjoys solitude’?”

I don’t need your petty word anyways, Lydia bitterly thought. “Alright, then.”

Hinata tried to perk up. “You know, while I have you accounted for, there is something I need to discuss with you.”

Lydia arched one brow. “And what is that?”

Hinata began to walk away. “Oh, do come.”

Lydia was highly confused, but began to follow the girl, who was going downstairs. From the front hall, they proceeded to the discrete staff hall, left of the parlour. Hinata was right the first time; this section of the manor was lacking in anything interesting. There were only six doors; for each of the staff, plus a bathroom, at least Lydia guessed.

The target destination, however, was at the very end of the hall. Hinata unlocked yet another blocked-off section, which immediately led to a descending staircase. She allowed Lydia inside, then closed and locked the door behind her.

“Where are we?” Lydia interrogated.

“I’ll explain momentarily,” Hinata replied. “Please, just head downstairs.”

Lydia furrowed her brows, finding this all too suspicious, but didn’t refuse yet.

At the bottom of the stairs, there was a room with very modest decor; some potted plants and a few panels with ink-wash paintings of forests and hills with things like shinto shrines and bridges with ponds and streams. The only furniture in the room, besides a small wooden stand in the back corner, was a chaise lounge with ivory fabric and dark wood borders, and one similarly-styled chair across the way.

Hinata came from behind, gesturing to the chaise. “If you will.”

Lydia mentally sighed, but obeyed and seated herself in the nice chaise, which was surprisingly more comfortable than she anticipated. Hinata retrieved something from the drawer in the stand; a small stack of papers. She then returned to the chair.

“What is this?” Lydia inquired. “Why did you bring me down here?”

Hinata gestured around. “This room is hardly used, but it does have a rather important purpose.” She smirked. “I’ve noticed you’re a girl that prefers to get straight to the clear point, am I wrong?”

Lydia shook her head. “You’re right.”

“In which case, that is what I’ll provide,” Hinata continued. “Aetherius Manerij is a homey place with, I’m proud to say, supportive staff that will never try to treat you any less than themselves or us. But underneath, this place is still considered a mental institution, and there’s a reason you’re here.”

Lydia sighed, “I see where this is going. Before it continues, maybe you can provide a hint by telling me if that door is locked to keep us in or others out?”

“Either,” Hinata replied. “It merely depends on how you view it. After all, you are given almost every freedom within these grounds, but, as you’ve surely figured out by now, there are some exceptions that may remind you of the truth of this place. One of those exceptions is a necessary part of my form of treatment; one very unpopular though often effective and undoubtedly safer.”

“Rehabilitation, yes?” Lydia suggested.

Hinata nodded. “What you’re witnessing now is the only thing I will make you do, but it is applied to all patients sooner or later. Consider it a simple session of talking; just that, nothing else, and whatever is said will stay forever secured in this safe room.”

“What’s the point?” Asked Lydia.

“Like a checkup or a quiz,” Hinata explained. “I’ve found that talking about certain things, regardless of how hard it may be, will help relieve the stress, anxiety, and overall impact of the trauma. And the other thing is something I need, and putting it in a way you’ll appreciate, something you’ll need to get out of here and carry on with your life. That is the evaluation of your conscious and subconscious behaviour; determining if what sent you here is healing or not, and how much if so.”

This sounds horrid, Lydia thought. “What am I supposed to talk about?”

“This is your first time, so it’s not going very deep or prodding any wounds. All I want is to get to know more about you.” She gained a taunting smirk. “Precisely what you just did to me, upstairs. Only this time, I’ll be asking the ‘touchy’ questions. Whether you answer or not is entirely up to you, though I will say that the more you give me, the more I can give you. Does that all make sense?”

Lydia’s eyes narrowed. “Didn’t Ciel already tell you about all of that?”

“Ciel can only tell me what he alone saw during the aftermath.” Hinata winked. “That doesn’t mean he can tell me what you saw, and your own thoughts on the matter. That, even if I hear his report a thousand times, is the only thing that will really help.”

Lydia nodded. “Alright. Whenever you’re ready, doctor.”

“Excellent,” Hinata chimed. “Now, we’ll start like most when they’re just meeting. Your name is Lydia Rein, and as far as I’m concerned, that’s all I know about you.” She took out a pen, ready to write something on a paper. “So tell me, where do you come from? Why are you here? Do you have any friends or family?”

Lydia blinked hard, her fist clenched. Bitter thoughts ran through her head; how dare this lady sit there like the noble snob she was, asking about a home and family when she knew damn well that she didn’t have any? It was repulsive, making her bite her lip angrily. However, as she tasted the blood from that bite, she discretely gasped and wiped her mouth.

Hinata was already writing something down, which wasn’t encouraging, but she remained silent as she waited for an answer.

Lydia sighed again, “I...I come from Oxford, of course, somewhere in the east part of the city. I lived in an inn, and had an involuntary job with helping to keep it. I only had my mother as family, and my friend…” She cringed at the thought. “I never had any.”

Hinata looked incredibly patient. “What about siblings, or your father?”

Lydia shook her head. “I was an only child, and my father left while I was still young. He caught my mother committing adultery, and the next night, he stormed out the door and never returned.”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” Hinata responded. “That must’ve been very hard on you.”

“So you would think,” Lydia replied. “But I never really cared. I liked being alone, and never held a grudge against my mother. She was really a good woman, but just like any human, she had a few of her own flaws.”

“I’m sure she was great,” Hinata agreed. “She must’ve been, to have such a charming daughter. Although, I would like more about you. Do you have any interests? Hobbies, talents, etcetera?”

Lydia shook her head. “I’ll read every so often, but I never was very ‘talented’ at anything but getting into trouble.”

Hinata laughed, “That much I can imagine. Although, we’ve been up that street before, with how many juvenile boys we take in.” She wrote something down. “So, how did you end up here, at the manor?”

Lydia began to shake at the thought. The visions still haunted her every waking moment. They came and went even now, offering flashes of the horror she witnessed; a horror painted out of crimson and shadows.

She gulped, her voice wavering. “It was nighttime, and I couldn’t sleep. I stayed up to wait for one lady…” She clenched her fist. “I heard a strange sound, but...When I got there…” She covered her mouth, whimpering, “Mother…”

That last horrid image finally broke her mind entirely, and she had to use all her will to prevent from collapsing in a sobbing mess. While she was able to prevent that much, she couldn’t get even one more word out.

“Something terrible must’ve happened,” Hinata remarked.

Lydia still couldn’t speak, just nodded solemnly.

Hinata took a deep breath. “Lydia, I don’t get many patients like you. Some of them mask their fears, their heartache, their pain; they hide everything behind things like humour, smarts, kindness, loyalty, even ego. It’s typically very obvious at first, but I don’t see it in you. Very complex…”

Still speechless, Lydia just glared up.

Hinata chuckled, “Apologies, I’ll just skip ahead. A common way to think of this mental phenomena is like donning a mask, but a more accurate one is the comparison of building a thick wall behind one tiny portion of your mind. While it can come in use and keep you safe, it’s also blocking out far more than the bad things you seek to hide from.”

Lydia was breathing deeply, crossing her arms uncomfortably.

“It’s not easy,” Hinata continued. “You built that wall, like many do, in order to defend yourself when you need it; retreat when you can’t fight. But staying in that one section is just as dangerous. If you don’t confront what’s beyond it, both the good and the bad, soon enough, something else is going to shatter that wall for you. And trust me when I say that nobody will like those results.” She wrote something down. "To put it lightly, retreat is temporary. The true solutions are either cooperation or annihilation."

Lydia kept her gaze downcast, now. She tried to think of this all as stupid and meaningless, but also found some sense in the words.

Hinata smiled happily. “Now, I think we’ve done more than enough, for this session. Why don’t we go upstairs and join the others for afternoon tea?”

Noon already? Lydia thought. “Y-Yes, please.”

Hinata stood up gracefully. “Then we should go before Alice decides to use all the honey again.”

Lydia acted normal, following her out, but inside, she was in shambles.

Each day, I only feel more insane. Am I really mad?