《When God Is Bored He Builds New Worlds… Mine Was Next, Unfortunately...》BONUS: Intermission Episode 1: Spring Break For Summons?!
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~ Spring Break for Summons?! ~
Welcome to the Intermission episode!
We’re running with the name, “SPRING BREAK FOR SUMMONS.”
Because today we are celebrating Spring Break
Intermission Episode 1
Kirev
Heheheheh.
The mischievous giggles of a sneaking assassin.
Drip, drip, drop.
The cold touch of tiny droplets of water falling on skin…
Something sinister was about to happen… that was for sure.
...SPLOOOOOOOSH!
“WAH!?”
Kirev shot awake in his bed. Water poured down on him from above.
The chilling touch of ice cubes tumbling down his shirt. The water running down his face and soaking into his blankets.
Shaking his wet hair like a dog, he looked around with weary eyes.
"Ehhh, what's the meaning of this?" he said, yawning.
His cheeky goddess Freya leaned in with a big smile. In her arms was an empty bucket and standing beside her were her two accomplices.
"Kirev, Kirev. It's an Intermission Episode, Kirev!"
Another face leaned in as well -- Ledger’s summon, Ares.
"Apparently we're going to play a game called volleyball? Never heard of it…” said the petite blonde girl with a puzzled look.
"Ho ho ho! Why not? Spring is the perfect time for games!" said another face as it leaned in as well.
It was the muscle-bound King Midas with a jolly red-faced grin. The large man dressed in swim shorts, sunglasses, and a towel draped over his shoulder.
Kirev leaned back as they all leaned in closer. He yawned while struggling to open his tired eyes.
"Ehh, it just seems out of place. The last episode was so action-packed. Shouldn't we finish with the conclusion of that one first?" he said with another big wide yawn and a stretch.
"Bahhhh, hurry up and get dressed!" said Freya rushing him out of bed.
“Alright, alright... I guess,” he replied, slinking out of bed.
Kirev slipped on his morning slippers and passed by the three summons, proceeding through the facility in his soaked pajamas -- still yawning and rubbing his eyes, half asleep.
A variety of Summons and Pilots all gathered in the rec rooms playing video games in their pajamas.
Surrounded by a mob of spectators was Raito and Serenity competing against each other on the big screen television.
There were only two players left alive, with both only having a single life left. The others surrounding them watched closely in awe.
“NOOOOOOOO!”
Kirev could hear Raito’s high-pitched squeal as he continued his stroll down the many winding facility halls. The rec room was cheering and laughing. Raito, the Master of Games, must’ve lost his title to Serenity.
As he walked by the launch area of the gate room where they kept all of the pods, he noticed a net spanning across. The net divided the area into two halves.
On one side there was the absolutely-blind Ledger with a racket in his hands and a badminton birdie on the floor.
On the other side was Ares holding her racket, with another puzzled look on her face as she watched Ledger fail to serve over and over again.
SWING-- miss. SWING--- miss. SWING!
“Is this how we play... badminton?...” asked Ares curiously as she watched her Summoner blindly fail to hit the birdie several times in a row from the other side of the net.
“Just wait, I’ll get this!” said Ledger confidently.
Kirev observed, scratching his head.
The morning urge to pee now tugged at Kirev’s conscious.
Kirev quickly jogged to the washroom.
As the automated doors opened, he yawned and walked into the rushing sounds of water and the warm misty steam of a prepared shower.
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‘Ah, Freya’s got the showers already turned on for me!’ he thought.
He pried off his soaked t-shirt and swung open the curtains.
‘Finally a little bit of fair treatment,” he thought to himself.
A naked girl with a bowl of cereal in her hands and a shocked expression stared up at him as he prepared to enter the shower.
“Idiot-idiot-idiot!!!” shouted the showering Amelie as she pulled the curtain closed.
“It’s obviously the girls turn in the showers!”
"Are you seriously eating breakfast in the shower?! Who even does that?!" asked Kirev with his hands raised.
"I do okay! It saves me time in the morning!" said the flustered Amelie.
"But... everybody hates soggy cheerios..."
The screech of Amelie’s yelp alerted the bathroom patrol.
Setsera, Misaka, and Calypso -- who were all in the midst of getting dressed and doing their hair -- charged at him in their towels.
"We're getting dressed, perv!" said Misaka kicking him.
Kirev shook his hands and pointed at Calypso.
"Eh, isn't Calypso a bad guy?!" asked Kirev.
“Not in an Intermission episode, dummy!” said Setsera, as the three girls pounced on him, taking him to the bathroom floor.
The girls began to beat him up in a cartoon-style dust ball, with limbs and towels flailing about.
"Don't attack me! Attack Calypso!"
※※※※※
SLAM!
Now Kirev found himself in a real sticky situation. He was locked out of the bathrooms, which were now guarded by the angels of death, and his urge to pee was reaching the critical point. He didn’t have much time left.
He only had one option left… a last resort if you will…
He would have to use the woods outside...
He would have to take the elevator up and pee in the park!
※※※※※
Kirev tapped his foot impatiently and hopped around as he waited inside the elevator, waiting to reach the top floor.
Ding!
He had reached the summit of dreams!
Sprinting, he charged to the woods to relieve himself.
“AHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhh,” he said, completing his morning mission.
“Kirev get over here! We’re picking teams for volleyball!” said Freya.
Turning around, he discovered himself surrounded in a resort-style park filled with Summons bathing in the warm heat of the spring sun. They bathed on the sands near the lake, with the delicious smell of smoke and meat searing on the barbeques.
‘All the summons are in bikinis! I love spring break!’ thought Kirev.
“Line up, Kirev! We’re going to pick teams for the Spring Games!”
Kirev walked over to the group of Pilots and Summons as two team captains began selecting their preferred teams. Everyone stood in summer clothes; bikinis, shorts, casual shirts, and sunglasses and summer hats.
Freya was the captain of Team One, while Amelie was the captain of Team Two. Both dressed in cute swimwear.
“Hmm…”
Freya stood in thought as she looked at her potential team prospects.
Kirev smiled and pointed to himself.
He was confident that his own Summon would surely choose him first out of the other available choices. Who else had such a strong bond and shared such a close connection?
“So many good choices. Hmmm…”
So many players were lined up for some volleyball!
Ares, Ledger, Ra, Lü Bu, Calypso, Midas, Heracles, Cortia, Orianna, Lityerses, Misaka, Raito, Serenity as Mischief, and even Pandora!
“For my first pick I choose Ares!” announced Freya with a twinkle in her eye.
“Eh! What about me, Freya?!” asked Kirev.
Ares pointed to herself, looking around.
“I got picked Ledger… what do I do?”
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“Walk over to Freya’s side...”
“Ah, okay! I like this game!”
“The game hasn’t started yet,” said Ledger.
The next chosen was Pandora, and then Serenity, and then Calypso, and then Midas….
Eventually, it was just down to Ledger and Kirev remaining in the lineup.
Kirev felt bad for Ledger. Surely Ledger would be the final pick seeing as he was blind as a bat and now had zero depth perception because of it… Poor sonuvabitch.
Freya whispered in the other team captain’s ear.
“I choose Ledger!” said Amelie.
“HE’S BLIND! You can’t seriously choose him over me!” said Kirev fuming.
Freya was giggling menacingly.
Did she seriously sell me out and convince Amelie to NOT pick me?!
“Hmmm, who do we have left… I chooose…” thought Freya out loud.
Freya pointed to an empty spot beside Kirev.
Kirev looked around confused.
This was getting cruel!
Had she just selected a ghost over him?
“NO ONE IS THERE!” said Kirev, having had enough.
A shake and rumble followed shortly after.
The ground rocked him back and forth.
“YMMMMIIIIRRRRRR!”
The colossal iron mech appeared from behind the thick forest of trees that surrounded the hidden park. Only his upper body was visible past the tall treeline.
Startled, Kirev sprang up flailing his arms.
“OH, COME ON!!! WHEN DID HE GET HERE?”
“Sorry, Kirev. You’re on Amelie’s team.”
He narrowed his eyes at Freya.
“Betrayed by my very own Summon!”
※※※※※
After a close match of the Summoner’s version of rock-paper-scissors, Lü Bu served first for Amelie’s team.
On Freya’s team, there was: Ares, Ra, King Midas, Ymir, Serenity, Misaka, Orianna, and Raito.
On Amelie’s team, there was: Pandora, Lü Bu, Calypso, Ledger, Heracles, Cortia, Lityerses, and finally Kirev.
We kept these teams for the remainder of the Spring Games.
Lü Bu tossed the ball up, crouched for a second and sprung up into the air, prepping for a high-powered serve. Spiking the ball, Lü Bu shot it towards Freya’s side of the net like a speeding javelin missile.
“...!”
Ares dashed towards the missile and ricocheted it off of her wrists before it hit the sandy floor.
“HOW’D SHE DO THAT?!” gasped the players.
“She’s quicker than lightning….!”
Midas bounced the ball up, setting it up for a spike for his team.
Ares sprang up and spiked the volleyball over the net.
“Get it!” called out Kirev’s team.
He watched as it came towards him full-power.
He would need to have a death wish to interfere with such a strike.
Kirev dived away from the speeding meteorite of a ball-- which caused an eruption of loose sand and an enormous crater in the beach floor.
Miss Kaya Kirasagi appeared alongside the arena. She donned striped referee clothes and blew into a loud whistle.
“Ares scored! Freya's team now has one point! Zero points for Amelie's team” announced Kirasagi.
“This game is going to kill us,” said Kirev to Ledger.
“Eh, I can't even tell what's happening…” said Ledger as he wandered around his side of the net completely blind. He felt the air around him looking for Kirev.
The Summons shook their heads at their lousy Summoners.
“Don’t dive away from the ball! You have to deflect it upwards before it touches the ground.”
The game continued and the barrages of volleyballs grew out of control. Each exploding just another hole in the sandy beach. It was starting to feel like the Normandy invasions of D-Day, with a small trench on both sides for the Summoners to hide in while the war took place just above them.
At first, Kirev chased after the ball, jogging back and forth like a dog trying to catch an impossible frisbee. Now, he joined the other Summoners in the war trenches shivering as each missile sounded off overhead.
Each of the cowering human players participating in the game had the ‘I've seen some shit’ expression on their faces as they clutched onto their war helmets nervously.
“I don’t wanna die like this!!”
But, Ares and Lü Bu continued their close competition.
An endless barrage of explosions and deflections. Freya, Ymir, Ra, Heracles, Calypso, and the other summons were having a blast competing at a high-octane tournament of strength and skill.
“Let us end this!” said Ares as she deflected the ball up with her wrists.
Tossing up the ball into the heavens, Ra appeared beside it -- ready to launch one final attack for their team.
“Piercing Solar Flare!” shouted the Egyptian God as he struck down the ball for a grand finale.
A shockwave of solar energy shook the players below. Ra's ultimate decimated the area, clearing the playing field of any remaining sand. The blast knocked the players back, rolling them into the nearby lake to cool off.
The sound of blowing whistles alerted the players that the game had concluded. The referee Miss Kaya Kirasagi waved about in her striped outfit.
“Team Freya are the winners!”
※※※※※
“That was a good game, Kirev.”
Kirev wrung out the sweat from his headband as he panted for air.
“That wasn’t volleyball… that was warfare!”
※※※※※
They finished off the day with barbequed steaks, burgers, and salads.
Ares kept calling them “borgars” rather than burgers, which got a laugh out of the others at her table. She couldn't figure out why everyone was giggling though.
“Steak or burger?”
“Borgar,” she replied, staring at the juicy hamburger in front of her.
*excessive giggling*
“Borgar?”
You could almost see the question marks forming above her head.
“Did you say burger or borgar?”
“Borgar.”
“Why do they call it that, Summoner? Ham-borgar, but it appears to be made of beef.”
※※※※※
And as always with spring -- came spring cleaning -- where the girls donned their favourite maid outfits and the boys geared up as butlers, and teams raced to clean up their respective areas before the others. Amelie and Ra won this one.
And for the deciding factor of who would win the Spring Games, they played a game called ‘Wager’. Wager was a game where at the center of the table was a tall empty glass. The first player poured as much beer as they wanted into the glass and then flipped a coin and called it. If they guessed right, they passed it to the other team. If they guessed it wrong they had to drink it all! Repeat until a victor is decided!
The last one literally standing wins!
This was mostly a luck-based game, which lucky for Ledger, was right up his alley. His Luck stat finally came in handy for this game. If only summon battles could be decided based on coin flips.
Nearing the end of this heated finale, it was Freya versus Heracles. While Ledger got lucky on most of his coin flips, he couldn’t outdrink the mighty Heracles.
“I can’t… continue…” said Ledger as he dropped his head on the table.
Freya and Heracles kept at it, neck and neck. The tiny coin looked like a little pebble in Heracles’ hand. He flicked it into the air.
“Garhhgh!” He said, in proper English.
“Heracles says tails,” said Lityerses, translating Herc’s garbled jargon.
The coin falls to the floor. Everyone peers over the table at it.
It reads…. HEADS….
“Wuhahahah! Herc’s got to finish the glass!” said Freya.
Heracles shook his head and slammed the drink.
“ARGRHHGHH!” said Heracles as he fell off his chair.
“The winner is Team Freya!” announced Referee Kirasagi.
“No way… Team Freya won…. Two to One!”
“Go team!” cheered Freya as she fell to the floor drunk.
As the sun lowered over the horizon, and the day came to an end, only a single soul remained awake in the entire park. Wager had destroyed everyone and left them in a snooze-coma. Everyone except for the referee Miss Kirasagi, who hadn’t participated in any of the games herself.
The area was littered with beer cans and filled with holes caused by the high-powered volleyball game. It was utter chaos.
“Aw, shit. I’m going to have to clean this all up now…” said Kirasagi.
Turning around, she notices the camera crew filming everything.
“And that concludes the Spring Games! Tune in later this week for more!”
She says, waving nervously into the camera.
THE END.
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