The rain was coming down heavily and Kael felt childish excitement at the novelty of standing out in the rain for his very first time. The excitement gave way to a twinge of fear when he remembered why he was out in the rain and not hiding behind a large rock with most of the others. It was time to confront the voth scouts. He had been surprised when Gerald agreed to the idea but perhaps he hadn’t given him enough credit.

‘Gerald wasn’t a completely spineless coward, well not entirely he is capable at least of taking the fight to the enemy when the alternative is getting ambushed on said enemy’s terms. Not a big whoop but it is something.’ Kael amended generously

“The last time I had their scent they were somewhere in that direction.” Kael choose his words carefully, he wasn’t sure how to talk to Gerald considering all the tension and disagreements of the last few days.

“Alright then let us head this way then, we can follow the wind once we make some distance. I am just glad it’s all over, those shitty lizards are the worst.”

The words hit Kael like a lightning bolt, for a second he was too stunned to reply. He hadn’t even realized it obsessed as he was with proving himself and defeating the enemy but the perfect chance to attack without notice was naturally a damned good opportunity to run away and if they were lucky the scouts would follow the others for at least a few days or maybe split up!

“Come on we need to hurry or the rain might just quit on us”

Kael was silent, his mind was whirling with different opinions and emotions.

“Don’t tell me you want to stick around for those guys? We don’t even know them! It’s been what two weeks maybe three…? They have been living under the ground like livestock for years, at least we gave them a few weeks of freedom. Maybe the voth don’t even want to kill them, remember we talked about how they might just be looking to find the location of a human settlement. Hell they could even end up protecting them once we are gone.” As Gerald spoke he realized he was getting angrier, why were they even having this conversation in the first place? What kind of idiot risked his life for a bunch of strangers who couldn’t even do the one thing they were supposed to do? It was their fault they were in this mess to begin with, walking so slow, bleeding on the path, eating all the food, and the worst not knowing the damned way to a settlement when that was the only reason Gerald agreed to protect them, they were utterly useless.

“I’m not going with you.” Kael replied finally, the sound of rain drowned the words but just his expression told Gerald everything. Kael felt relieved saying those words, like a weight had been lifted of him. Gerald snarled.

“Fine then see if I care, go get yourself killed for shit! I knew you couldn’t survive out here.” He started laughing at the end but there was no mirth in it. “Happy hunting, I won’t be holding you back anymore.”

Kael didn’t mind the sarcastic remark much but he suddenly felt like they were back at the compound, Gerald’s mocking smile and laughter, dull blue joyless eyes reminding him that he was too weak. Yet unlike those times he wasn’t afraid, he didn’t need to play along. He could say exactly what was on his mind after all he wasn’t the one running.

“Coward.”

Gerald’s posture tensed, raindrops pinged against his looted armour. Wearing it he seemed larger, more imposing but at that moment Kael felt larger still. Gerald should have walked away,

Kael was being an emotional idiot he assessed mentally. That should have been it, the awareness should have allowed him to let it go but the pressure of having a guillotine hang on over his head for days had piled up and that final ridiculous comment had his emotions boiling over dam he’d built for them.

‘One last time, for old times’ sake’ the thought was fuzzy and half formed in Gerald’s head consumed by the quiet rage that had erupted within him. Maybe in a different setting where his nerves were not so taut or his willpower so frayed he would have realized it was this same emotional recklessness that had driven Kael to save him from the swarm of carnivorous birds and he would have looked past the other boy’s stupidity. Things weren’t different though and Gerald felt no such restraint. He stared Kael deep in the eyes and let his rage wash over him, ignoring all the times he been told not to let his emotions get the better of him. He just wanted Kael to hurt, to understand how little his silly dreams and powerful father meant on the outside, a stupid mark didn’t mean shit in the real world especially if it was paired with a stupid mind.

He released the shackles on his deviation allowing it burst through him like a supercharged adrenaline rush, his feet left deep grooves in the wet soil as they propelled him forward, he was so desperate to release all his pent up frustration that his charging body seemed like human shaped spear fiercely thrust for blood.

To Kael it seemed like a demon had been set on him, in his dark red armour only Gerald’s glowing red eyes could be seen. Fear stabbed through his chest but the last month of trials had hammered in instincts years of training and negligence had failed to. He only barely managed to get his hands and feet into a defensive stance when Gerald’s gauntleted fist smashed into his face. He felt bones shatter and even with his neutered nerves his vision spun and pain robbed him of cognition. A second blow struck him the chest just as hard as the first, blood from his open mouth was spurted and his body hit ground hard. He struggled to recover his breath but Gerald continued to pummel him senseless. Gerald’s blows didn’t stop and Kael’s passive regenerative abilities might as well have been piss in the wind compared to the damage heaped on him. Despite all that Kael had managed to position his arms and legs so that they protected his head and abdomen. Gerald was so upset that he didn’t bother to strike around Kael’s limbs. When Gerald finally stopped Kael’s limbs were mangled so badly even he felt some pity. Blood and juices dripped all over the quivering body beneath him. The rain had stopped so the gauntlet covering his fists still dripped with blood. Although Kael had come to realize that he could release his ooze from practically any part of his body and without the need for any specific movements he knew it would only dent the armour at best, if he wanted to win he needed to get it past the visor of Gerald’s helmet. In short in the right conditions he could kill Gerald but not beat him. Gerald hadn’t given him the chance to do so as the constant barrage had prevented Kael from concentrating enough to even release a full forced tentacle and he hadn’t been able to look directly at Gerald during the attack to aim one regardless.

*Clap, clap, clap*. Gerald turned around and saw a voth performing an admirable slow clap and showing rows of sharp teeth in what he imagined was supposed to be grin. Gerald’s stomach sunk when he realized it was one of the freakish seven to eight footers and not one of the diminutive fellows of barely five feet. If he survived he would kill Kael he swore, the little bastard but looking the form beneath him he felt he had probably already accomplished that, small mercies. The little empathy Kael’s pathetic state had garnered disappeared like it had never been there.

Kev Desorithe was delighted. He dropped the human gestures like the toothed smile and the clapping that he had been emulating. Hopefully the other partly got the message that he had been trying to convey. Instead he allowed his teeth to chitter and clack in pure bliss and he himself to enjoy the heady thrum of the song in his veins. When the two voth noticed the unfamiliar but sweet scent of blood immediately after the rain stopped and in the direction of the human camp they’d agreed it needed investigating. Kev Soril had chosen to check if the humans had tried to escape using the rain and left him the potentially more exciting task of investigating the scent of blood. What he found was exciting indeed the strange smelling youngling from another tribe was being pummelled by the human in armour. Some parts of him disdained the inefficient methods the armoured man employed, it was very bad hunting to not kill your opponent as quickly as possible, but other parts were excited by the mixed scents of blood and bodily fluids, the tenderized meat promised to be both chewy and soft and the blood of a live creature would be a hot rich stream down his throat. After weeks of living on dry rations it took great effort for him to restrain his cannibalistic urges and he was both thrilled and disgusted by it all. At least he could think of a good reason to have some fun, there was no way the younglings could hunt the humans and the weird voth if they killed themselves was there? That was why he needed to stop the fight. The Mother wouldn’t mind and no one would bother complaining if anything he could disguise it as trying to help out the young ones. The shallow reason was more for himself than anyone else, an excuse to cut loose. Calmly Desorithe unfastened his great spear and gripped the shaft tightly. His teeth chattered fervently as rain water still making its way down and through the dense foliage pitter-pattered around the two humanoids, drip then drop, drip then drop.

Kev Desorithe felt the song surge within him and he kept his distance from it reverently, believing it to be the voice of the Mother, only allowing it to guide him but never dwelling in it. He charged forward holding little back, with the help of his inner flame and a push of his powerful legs he barrelled right into the Gerald before Gerald could swing his sword. The armour was hard and unyielding and the Kev definitely bruised his own shoulders barely where as his opponent only stumbled but the purpose of the charge had never been to cause harm. It allowed Desorithe to close in and grip the human’s sword arm tightly preventing him from using his sword long enough for the voth to jam his tail’s spike at his opponent’s eye.

When Gerald’s ability was in play, it caused time to stretch and motion to slow, his own light lightening quick actions were seeming slow and deliberate to his eyes much less the voth who was slightly stronger but significantly slower. It should have been easy then to take control of the tempo of the fight but somehow Gerald found it was all he could do to react to the voth’s actions. He managed twist his head fast enough that the abominations tail glanced off his helmet. The voth was unfazed, the song whispered to him that in the moment Gerald avoided the spike his grip of his sword had loosened slightly, it was enough. Desorithe seized the opening and the hilt of Gerald’s sword and twisted it free of the human’s grip. Gerald knew he couldn’t compete with the voth in strength so he resolutely gave up on the weapon and seized the chance whilst his opponent’s hands were occupied to slam his fist into its face.

Desorithe did not hear any warning from the song and the punch struck him straight in the face but this was a good day, he could feel the Mother smiling upon him, gifting him with unusual fluidness. He recovered from the punch almost instantly but Gerald’s next punch was faster still. It planted itself right in the centre of Desorithe chest but he did not sway. Desorithe dropped his spear and the sword then gripped Gerald by the waist and pulled him closer. He arched his back backwards and lifted Gerald of the ground and slammed his head into the ground fiercely. He let go of Gerald and allowed Gerald’s body to fall to the ground in a heap. He lifted his own torso and straightened himself out, rising from the n shaped posture with the same inhuman fluidness he moved into it.

Slowly Desorithe picked up his spear and spared a glance at Gerald’s prostrate form. He wasn’t expecting the human to get up soon. His own performance was vastly different from the formers he had struck a single well placed blow dealing with his enemy in a way that did not allow for come backs or surprises. It would have been better to kill the boy but his task was to track and leave a trail, not kill so he couldn’t. The suplex had countered the armour and perfectly target its weakness. That was for all its imperviousness it could not do anything about internal damage. Slamming Gerald head into the ground had left his head mostly unharmed but it forced his neck to suddenly bear the weight of his entire body plus the armour, the force of impact and no small amount of shock. It was the kind of injury that could instantly cripple, paralyse or even kill a foe with little external evidence. Luckily for Gerald War god deviants were tougher than most. He was only temporarily robbed of muscle control and his extremities were all tingling.

Kev Desorithe decided to watch the two in case a scavenger decided they looked tasty. He didn’t have to wait long for Kev Soril, the other humans were still where they were meant to be. He told Kev Soril that he found them fighting, which was true and though confused his comrade did not doubt it. With the exciment and bloodlust fading he felt a sliver of shame for his actions but it passed. The rained resumed with instant intensity, it was like it had never stopped, which was good because it would hide the scent of blood and hopelessness for a while. With the start of the rain he no longer had any reason to stay, silently he disappeared into the vibrant forest in his head the song went on, the hunt wasn’t over.

Moments before Kev Desorithe left. Kael had witnessed most of the fight, although to him the details were blurred, he knew scuffle broke out then suddenly Gerald feet were of the ground and his head was planted firmly in it, meanwhile the voth displayed a spine with the consistency of rubber.

‘Could I do that?’ even if though his spine was stronger and more flexible than it had ever been without skill it meant nothing. Even if he drained that voth too and made his body bigger and stronger so what? He would never be its match. The pain from all his injuries had brought him surprising clarity, well first it had brought him anger and plenty of fear which had later been replaced with sadness and self-pity but that left and eventually he had become clear headed. He couldn’t help himself Kael so he definitely couldn’t help the others, trying to do so was just asking for them to all be killed. He still didn’t agree with Gerald’s actions earlier but now he felt like he understood them. A hero needed strength, it sounded obvious enough but somehow he misunderstood, it should never have been so ambiguous, it should have been something like a hero requires great strength, without it he/she is only a corpse. Kael felt his healing suddenly slow to a crawl, he panicked for a second before he understood what happened. He had run out of despair, the secrets (he really needed a fixed name for it like bloodline or blood powers) that he had stolen from Rufus and Fragment had used to alter his body allowed him to keep healing albeit at a much slower rate.

‘I could help, make you stronger’ it was Fragment, he had said that line before but when Kael questioned him he went silent.

‘Really how? I let you alter my body again? We don’t have any time for that and what happens if one day you decide to stop helping me? I need to figure it out for myself.’

‘No not that there is something else, another way to get stronger, your kind call it meditation.’

‘You know a meditation technique.’ Kael was surprised even his father only knew a portion of one.

The rain started up again all of a sudden, Kael didn’t bother resisting it or try to find cover, it had washed away the flies and ants that had begun to gather around him, and for that he was grateful.

‘No, I know several of varying use and efficiency.’

‘Bullshit! Why tell me now? I would have believed you if you told me you had one or maybe part of one but several cut the crap.’ Kael didn’t trust the voice in head, so far it had saved his life thrice directly and maybe even more indirectly but he knew the moment he started to listen to it he could go crazy or worse the voice might take control of body for good.

‘I have been waiting for you to be desperate enough to do whatever I say. It will not be easy, it will be painful and ultimately the goal will be for it to serve my purposes not yours that you will profit from it is only a side effect of it.’

‘Why would I trust you and what makes you think I’ll be your willing slave? I’m not dead yet. How do I know you aren’t trying to steal my body?’

‘If I wanted your body I need only wait. Conflicting desires from the creatures you imitate will eventually drive you insane. Or perhaps you would eventually reach a point where in order to make further progress you would need to alter your brain so that it can handle your body’s new functions and a single mistake would leave you a vegetable. There is a reason why the one who warped you put me here. You cannot hope to survive in your body with your gift. If you use it, it will drive you mad, if you don’t you will eventually die a preventable death. I don’t want your body, I had my own before I was ripped from it. I do not want to follow the machinations of the one who did this to me and whilst the person may have made preparations for me I am certain there are none left behind for you. Help me and I will help you this is a partnership not slave a contract.’

Kael was silent for a long time, even though he could move now he didn’t, the rain was still falling so he most likely didn’t have to worry about predators and he would heal faster and even if that weren’t the case couldn’t think of anything else except Fragment’s words.

‘What do you want me to help you with?’

‘Parts of my memory were erased and it is possible other parts were altered. We will learn what it did not want me to know and uncover the lies it fed me.’

‘You mean the one who gave me my deviation and the mark? I don’t think we can fight a god.’

‘It did not give you your powers it warped them, twisting them into what they are now. Your powers come from you, from what your anima is able to glean from your greater self. I don’t intend to fight it, I may not remember but it seems clear that it flayed me when I was at my strongest, complete and whole, if so what hope do I have now? I want to understand why though and I want to remember who I was when I was whole. This is not an unreasonable request is it? ’

Kael found himself unable to reply, every time this thing, Fragment, had tried something like this it was when Kael’s judgement was compromised it admitted to this, how could he trust it? Yet he was gripped by the story it wove, if it wasn’t a lie he was just a victim and Kael was one too! They were trapped in the same boat, they could only sink or swim together. Yet the voices story held no compelling evidence, why should Kael believe it. The only reason Kael did not dismiss it all as the temptations of the devil was that Fragment had done a good job saving Kael and improving his body in fact he had only been a help so far but it felt too soon to say he could trust the voice, what if this was all part of the con.

Kael decided to derail the conversation a bit partly because he was curios and also because it meant he wouldn’t need to make a decision immediately.

‘You said I would end up a vegetable if I made a mistake altering my brain. Does this mean when you take over my body you use my brain?’

‘No my connection to your body is fairly loose… the situation is more complicated than that.’

For a while he was silent but when it became clear Kael was not going to say or do anything on his own he continued.

‘The simplest explanation would be that I send signals to your anima and it to your brain and then signals are sent back to me according to the same sequence’

Kael was trying to figure out what this meant was Fragment trying to say that he thought with his anima and not his brain that it was just a point of control and that a bad brain prevented him from getting those signals? If this was true then even if he made a mistake that made him a vegetable it wouldn’t matter because he used his power with his anima not his brain and if it was capable of thought then he could repair the damage. Considering it further it seemed to hint that he could survive even if his body died, like Fragment in a way but would his powers allow him to build another body? He was angry at Fragment for deceiving him about the vegetable body but thinking back Fragment had never said the process was permanent or irreversible only that he could help prevent the issue. Still it was a reminder that he couldn’t trust Fragment.

Kael’s body was lifted off the ground by Gerald, he was being carried somewhere. Kael was confused, why was Gerald carrying him why didn’t he just leave, wasn’t he angry? He was also relieved what to do next how to do it had become a crushing weight on his shoulders, was he to stay and help the others or should he just run away use his powers to take the form of an animal and hope the voth couldn’t tell it was him? Now the decision was being made for him, all he had to do was go along with it. Kael found that he couldn’t bring himself to look and check after all no matter what Gerald chose Kael still wasn’t sure how he felt about it. Shamed burned him it felt worse than his fractured bones, he could still remember when he decided to face the voth and rescue his new companions no matter what. The choice seemed so naïve and hypocritical in retrospect.

‘This is as far as my resolve goes? This is the measure of me as a man?’ His thoughts were like whips that flayed his flesh and exposed the ugly truth behind all his pretence.

He forced himself to focus on Fragments offer but his thoughts were all over the place.

‘Can I get some time to think about it? I… I need time’

‘Certainly and should you have second thoughts after the deal we can stop at any time.’

‘Wait what? I can stop whenever I feel like it? Then what stops me from learning what I want and the calling of the deal?’

‘I know things more precious than even meditation techniques, secrets that even dragons covet, should you complete my quests I’ll tell them to you. Naturally if I decide you don’t have what it takes I’ll will not waste my time helping you. I have other means.’

The last line sent a shiver down Kael’s spine, was it a threat? What other mean could he have other than taking his body? One more reason to accept or maybe it just its way of scaring him into doing something stupid. Kael shook his head but the questions and doubt were persistent in plaguing him.

‘I’ll wait.’

‘A prudent choice.’ Fragment.

The truth was Kael had already made his decision there was no way in *hell* he was agreeing to something he knew practically nothing about. He would do his best to buy time by pretending to be interested and torn whilst looking for information about meditation techniques or someone whose powers could deal with soul ghost things. He felt slightly better with a plan in mind but he couldn’t shake the feeling of being besieged from within and without. I just need to survive and since I can’t fight I need to run. His second solution was something he had already played around with at the back of his head. He needed a form small enough that he could switch to it without having to discard this one but big enough that he didn’t just end up in some random rodents belly. Something with wings preferably. Kael was afraid that he wouldn’t have enough despair to change form after all even though it was known that life and death experiences and constant contact with ambient despair helped deviants grow stronger the process was very slow and he wasn’t capable of observing his own strength and despair capacity like some other deviants so he only had the faintest of ideas how much he had improved.

With all his ponderings having reached the conclusions Kael felt his mind become muddled slow, he was so tired, all he wanted to do was sleep. Even his fear and adrenaline only barely managed to keep his eyes open. This was one of those moments when the weight of the whole trip just seemed to weigh down on him, egging him to submit.

‘I need more time.’ Kael thought ‘More time to grow.’

Kael was felt some regret that he didn’t have the chance to stay at Tenlight longer. Instead he was forced into this mess where things only seemed to get worse. He hadn’t had much of a choice though it was this or Avin.

‘Fucking stone monster!’

The rain stopped him from smelling them before he heard them, which felt slightly odd to Kael. He was getting used to having an all knowing nose. Knowing that Gerald had chosen to come back felt good, with his help he had a chance of helping the others however unlikely. Kael wasn’t delusional enough to count on any actual help from Gerald, he knew that as far as the blue eyed boy was concerned they were walking meat shields and he himself was only one with better quality.

The smell of sweetness in the air was welcoming, Bloke, Barnel and Kip were sitting a mound of orange elliptical fruits. Their faces literally dripping with gooey grins as they stuff themselves silly. The grins froze on their faces when they finally noticed Gerald carrying Kael. The blood had long been washed away by the rain but Gerald’s slow movements made it obvious he was injured as well. They could see the defeat on face in that instant the joy of their lucky bounty turned to acid in their stomachs. Bloke’s fist clenched his club so hard his knuckles went white, Barnel’s hands started to shake and Kip went deathly still.

Gerald dropped Kael unceremoniously and snatched a fruit for himself. Then as if oblivious to the eyes him, he busied himself devouring its fleshy insides and then finally finished, he reached for a second fruit and began the process again. As if by some unspoken command the other three started eating themselves. The laughter and lousy jokes were missing though, except for Kip who still burst into crazed laughter every once in a while.

When Kael had recovered enough to move without pain, he started eating as well. Healing his wounds had cost him a lot of the blood and the other organic material he had been saving for his second body. Already diminished in order to sustain his daily needs his stash had fallen dangerously low. He might not have the biomass needed to recover completely from the next serious injury.

The fruit was sweet and meaty with only a slight bitterness in its aftertaste, the equivalent of bliss after weeks of acrid berries and dry bark, he lost himself to gluttony. He only noticed how much he had eaten when there was nothing left, he felt a pang of shame but no regret.

‘Yes I earned this.’

The three ordinary humans walked off into the shrubbery at the sight of the bundle of fruit skins. They returned with the hands filled more of the glorious fruit. After three or four similar trips the bundle was larger than ever.

The group returned to their excessive eating like a pack of wolves attacking a carcass and for a while it seemed like rest of their day would pass filled with ill-advised indulgence coupled with the conscious forgetting of the events that transpired that morning. Yet reality was too cruel to allow itself to be forgotten if even for a day.

Kip bit hard into the skin of a fresh fruit, the taste of it was almost sickening after so many but the juice was well wet and after so long without water the copious amounts fluid made it addictive. This time though there was little juice and his teeth were stopped by something hard and slippery. Instinctively he spat it out but it clenched to his lip and then forced his way into his mouth. His confusion turned to panic when multiple small black dots flew out of the fruit and into his face with a buzz.

Kael watch in horror as tens of black beetles swarmed Kip forcing their way into him through his eyes, his nostrils and his mouth when he opened his mouth to scream and breathe. Kip leapt to his feet and ran round in frantic circles but the insects followed him like the plague. The others backed off subconsciously, fear growing in the pits of their stomach. Kael watched in horror, he couldn’t think of a way to help Kip without hurting him and the thought of the bugs forcing their way into Kip through the imagined wound had him gagging. Finally the last insect made its way in through an ear, Kip’s screams pierced the air without pause. His orifices dripped blood and he tore at his own hair, spastic and in pain from phantom wounds.

It was a mercy when Gerald drove his sword into Kip from the back. Everyone flinched expecting a black stream of beetles to exit through the wound but none came.

“We need to leave.”

The two remaining non deviants picked up a half-finished sack kludged together from vines and large leaves. They had to hold it together in an odd position to stop the fruits from falling. The weight of it in their hands felt like lead in their bellies but they couldn’t bring themselves to leave the fruits behind, they needed to eat to live. Tears fell freely down Barnel’s face and Kael wondered why they were missing from his.

‘Is that something else Fragment decided I didn’t need?’ But he couldn’t bring himself to ask the illusory voice. He was hit with a feeling of alienation that stemmed from his own body, he hadn’t felt this bad even when he first morphed.

He was grateful then when tears wet his face leaving watery trails. Yet the horror and alienation remained, he stared at the nameless fruit in his hand, the missing piece in it seemed to taunt him.

You can’t stop me. You can only wait for me to come. You can’t save them. You can only watch me take them.

He almost called out to Fragment right then and there accepting the devils bargain but somehow he managed to ride out the urge. The fear remained though fear and sorrow that surprised him with its strength.

They had travelled some distance with their cursed bounty leaving Kip’s body to the scavengers, and the scavengers to the beetles. The trip was silent, they were all consumed with their imaginings, worlds where they never found the fruits, where they had miraculous powers that saved the day and made everything easy, worlds where it just didn’t hurt as bad, worlds where they all made it out alive.

Kael fell asleep eventually but his dreams were plagued with screaming men and death that rode the sky. He woke up screaming, surprised that he was still alive, delirious with fear.

“I Accept!”

It took him a minute to realise he said it aloud and not in his head.

‘I accept, just help me please!’

‘Alright, shall we begin?’

‘Yes! Yes let us… let us start.’