Sophia Parker

I knocked firmly on the huge brown doors leading to 'his' office.

"I can do this." I whispered to myself as I took deep breaths.

Yes, I am ashamed of what happened yesterday but I wouldn't let it affect me OR repeat itself in any way today. I'm just going to pretend like it didn't happen. And if he tries to do anything, I'll run out!

After no response, I decided to just walk in.

I opened the door with one hand, his coffee and dairy in my other hand. I didn't even bother to look at him or say hello but I knew he was there. My body was completely aware of his presence.

I carefully walked to the edge of his large brown desk, maintaining as much distance as possible, then I placed the cup as close to him as I could... which was still very far from him.

"Alice informed me that you scheduled a meeting with someone from AIRTEX today at 10am. It's currently 9:45. Apart from that, your diary is empty. Is there anything you would like me to do for you today?"

After reading from his diary, I closed the book and looked at anything else but him, trying not to give away any emotions. But deep down I was trembling! I had just slapped this man yesterday! I don't know if he's angry with me or what he is going to do to me today.

"Yes." He said with that deep and masculine voice he had and my body warmed up from head to toe.

I hope whatever he wants me to do is in good faith.

"I want you to look at ME Sophia. Stop avoiding my eyes." He said in a commanding voice, which annoyed me.

"I'm not avoiding anything!" I said harshly.

"Then look at me." He challenged.

I looked at him, and suddenly my anger disappeared. His eyes were glittering and they told me everything. The glint they had revealed sadness, and even though he was trying to hide it, his face showed it all. The dark, colourless eyes that mourned his despair stared right at me, like I was the reason for his pain, for his suffering.

I've never felt so guilty of hurting someone so badly like this...

"Why don't you want to be my girlfriend Sophia?" He asked quietly.

What?!

My eyes flew wide open. I was completely shocked by his question! When did he ever asked me to be his girlfriend?! I didn't get the memo!

I couldn't tell if he was joking because the look he held was so genuine. He couldn't be seriously asking me that, could he?

"Why don't you approve of me?" He continued. "Sometimes, you look at me like I'm a repulsive creature and it hurts. Could it be my looks... or my attitude... or my remarks? Or anything else? Please just tell me. I'm willing to change so that you can like me."

Wow! I couldn't believe my ears.

"What does Sean have that I don't? I mean... he's a good guy but I'm not too bad myself, right? I'm sorry about that fight I had with him. I promise you that's not the real me. Sean and I are really good friends, I was just so jealous of him. Seeing you with him makes me so mad. I sometimes wish I could be him, just to know what its like to have your attention. Even if it's just for a day. "

Oh my god. What is he saying?

"I really want to know what your love feels like. So please Sophia, tell me all I need to do to earn it and I promise I will do them all. I know that arrogance is not the way to get you and I'm sorry for every single time I've been arrogant towards you... Tell me what your ideal man is and-"

"Okay STOP! Please, Mr Wilson just stop talking!" I couldn't take it anymore. "Do you realise what you've just said?!"

I'm astonished at the fact that he just disclosed all of that to me, but I found it more disturbing. He sounded like he was wounded and needed some sort of healing. That was something I never expected him to ever say, considering that he's always so tough. Right now, he sounds like a wimp.

"Yes Sophia, everything I said is how I truly feel and I'm ready to compromise myself so you can love me. You can start by telling me what attracts you to the opposite sex. What are your likes and dislikes in a man?"

"Enough! Please, I've had enough of this. I do not wish to discuss that with you so just forget about it completely." I waved him off.

Has this man gone completely insane?! Where has his masculine ego gone to?

I picked up some scattered files I noticed on his desk and decided to arrange them into their shelves.

I walked across the room, towards the shelves. He stood up and pursued me.

"Mr Wilson, please go back to your table." I warned him without turning around. I could feel him standing behind me and I hated it.

"Why do you do this to me?" He complained.

"Do what?!" I faced him. "All I did was give you coffee and update you about your meeting. What else have I done?"

"You're being hostile towards me now Sophia but I swear... If I touch you like yesterday-"

"DON'T! Don't you dare bring that up!" I gave him a deadly look. He was not going to do that words thing that he usually does. Not this time.

"So are we just going to pretend like it never happened?"

"Yes! At least I am."

"Well, I can't."

"In that case, I can't keep working here anymore." I dropped the files with a loud thud. "I am not comfortable with what happened yesterday and I'm scared that you'll violate me again like you did. That was unacceptable! You mauled me and I didn't have any other choice. Thank god Phoebe walked in."

If she hadn't, then we would have been telling a different story from now.

"Is that how you really feel... like I violated you?" He asked seriously.

"Yes. And because of that, I quit for the second time! You don't know how embarrassed I was. I thought I could put everything behind me and come to work today without you hounding me but I guess not. This time, I'm leaving and I don't care about my notice period. You can take me to court for all I care, but I can't stand another second with you and your unprofessional attitude towards me!" I had to catch my breath when I was done ranting.

He looked at me wordlessly. The look on his face was worse than before, I may have just broken his heart. Although that sounded silly.

"Is that what you really want Sophia?"

"Yes." I said without really thinking about it. I tried not to notice the unhappiness and disappointment written all over his face. He simply nodded.

"Okay." He said strongly but with a lace of regret. "I'll get all your resignation documents ready as soon as possible. Then you can finally be free of me. I'm sorry if I was ever a bother to you, and I'm sorry about yesterday. I thought we were on the same page but I guess not. It was never my intention to embarrass or violate you."

He turned and finally left me alone. I went back to arranging files on the shelf, thinking about what the hell I just said.

I heard him call Paul through his intercom and tell him to process my documents and finalize them today. He had deliberately kept them on hold and used the notice period to keep me here longer, but now it seemed like he was ready to let me go.

Yes, I wanted to leave but I'm not sure if I never wanted to see him again. My words were harsher than I expected them to be and all of a sudden I feel very remorseful.

I finished with the files and walked out just as his 10am client from AIRTEX walked in. I went to my office and sat down on my chair. I looked around, suddenly realizing that this may be the last time this place belonged to me. Working here was a huge part of my life and I don't know what it would be like without it. I am really going to miss this.

My phone buzzed and I smiled when I saw the caller ID was my mum.

"Hey mum." I answered.

"How are you darling?"

"Great." I lied.

"How are things going with your job? You said you will be leaving soon but its been over a month now."

"As a matter of fact, things just got finalized today."

"Great! Because as you know, a while ago your father was discharged from the hospital and he's at home now. He got worried when I told him about the situation with your job and he wants to see you. He'll be more than happy if you come home."

That sounded like a good idea. A good way to get away from all that's been happening and just clear my head. Whenever I go back home to Virginia, I always find it relaxing.

"Oh mum, I would love to. I could seriously use a break right now."

"A break from what? Is anything stressing you out?"

If only she knew!

"A bit, but its okay. Don't worry so much. I'd love to come tomorrow if that's possible but I don't know when my documents are going to be processed. I'll keep you in touch with what's happening."

"Sophia." She said with a serious tone. "Is your boss still harassing you?"

"No! No! Not at all, he got the memo already. He's letting me go." I said. Which was true because he had apologized for his cruel act yesterday and assured me that I would get my documents.

"Good. I can't wait to see you my love."

"Me too. I'm at work now mum so I'll call you later."

"I love you darling."

"Love you too." I said before I hung up.

I wish I get these papers today so I can leave New York tomorrow. Even the idea of moving back to Virginia was appealing to me but that would be the most cowardly thing I could ever do. I never run away from my issues and if I stay and find another job here in the city, it's likely that I would run into Mr Wilson again. I'll just have to deal with it.

*Hours later*

"Yes!" I breathed. That was the last of it.

I didn't know I had so much stuff here in this office. I had completely made it my own! I laughed at myself.

I had two small boxes of personal belongings after packing all my stuff. Normal people just have their stationary.

There was a knock on my door. Since I was already standing, I went to open it to find Paul.

"Oh, hey Paul." I greeted him.

"You alright Sophia?"

"Yeah. I just finished packing my stuff." I showed him my empty office.

"Sweet. Well, these are your documents. You'll need to review and sign them." He held them out to me and I took them like he was handing me a golden treasure. "I've had them ready since day one but you know Adam, he wanted you here for longer and instructed me not to give them to you."

"Really?! That's awful of him." I said and he laughed.

"Look. I don't know what's going on between you two, but it's not hard to put two and two together." He said.

"What do you mean?" I asked cautiously. Please let it not be what I think it means.

"I'm saying that Adam has never been skeptical about letting someone go. You're different." Here we go again. "Whatever happens, just make sure that you don't regret your decision."

"I understand perfectly what you're implying Paul. But I NEED to leave. And nothing is going to change my mind." I smiled at him.

He nodded his head respectfully and didn't bring it up again.

"All you have to do now is get Adam to sign those documents. That wouldn't be a problem since he prompted me to hand them to you today."

"Thank you. If he hasn't left yet then I could ask him to do so now." I was anxious as hell to get them signed. It was as if I was bargaining for my freedom, and who doesn't want to be free?!

"No, Adam left the office early this morning after his meeting with a client from AIRTEX." Paul said.

"Oh." I hadn't known that. Probably because my blinds were closed and I made no effort to see him or bring him coffee.

"And it's Friday today, so you'll have to wait till Monday. Till then, you're still committed to the office."

No!

"Okay."

"Alright. Goodluck with everything you have ahead of you." He said and hugged me. This may be the last time we see each other.

"You too Paul." I said and he left.

Once I closed the door I opened the envelope to take a look inside of it. It was quite heavy and had lots of papers. I wasn't going to read all of that so I just signed it. About 7 different places required my signature.

Once I was done with that, I decided to leave. It was already 4pm anyway. Picking up my two boxes and handbag, I made my way out of the office. I said goodbye to many people on the way, except Phoebe.

She was still mad at me and obviously, she wasn't in support of my resignation. She made that clear to me this afternoon when she didn't have lunch with me. I didn't even have the guts to ask her but I saw her at our usual Chinese outlet with someone else. I was forced to eat somewhere else all by myself.

After saying goodbye to everyone, I got a cab that took me home. The first thing I did was to book a flight to Virginia the next morning. I needed a vacation as soon as possible.

I got a large suitcase and began to pack my clothes, mostly dresses. I will be gone for at least a month so I need enough, unlike the last time where I literally packed nothing and had to squeeze into my old clothes.

It took me about an hour to finalize packing. After I booked the flight, I remembered Paul saying that I am still committed to the office unless Mr Wilson has signed the documents. If I leave for Virginia tomorrow, how will he sign the documents?

Well, it's already too late because I've booked my flight already. I should have thought of that before doing so.

I decided to text Paul, just in case.

After that, I hit send. It didn't take up to 10 minutes before he replied.

I can get him to sign them today, all I have to do is take it to him. But he has quite a few houses and I don't know which he's currently residing in.

I had never been in that apartment before. But from the outside, it looked beautiful. Maybe the best out of all his residencies.

Ok, so I need to get ready and meet him there before it gets late. It was already 7pm, if I quickly had a shower and dressed up, I would be there around 8pm.

I am nervous as this may be the last time I see him... at least for a while.

***

Adam Wilson

"Everything is over. Completely ruined." I spoke to the shrink.

"If you had followed my advice, then you would have made progress." It sounded like he was nagging, and he had that 'I told you so' ambiance. What kind of shrink is this?

"I did exactly what you asked me to do! In fact, I humiliated myself for that!" I shouted at him before taking a deep breath and calming down.

"Relax Adam. What exactly did you do?"

What did I do? I lost control. That's what I did. I was blinded by desire and the only thing I had wanted was to devour her. I went too far and she felt... violated.

"I cannot tell you what I did to her, but I hurt her. I tried to amend things today but I couldn't. She was really embarrassed at what happened and she resigned again, for the second time. Maybe I should just leave her alone, even though that's not what I really want to do but I've caused her enough pain."

"You've both caused each other enough pain. I'm sure other factors must have lead to her resignation."

Yes, the fact that I had my hands in places where they shouldn't have been. Fuck, she couldn't even look me in the eyes.

No wonder why she doesn't approve of me. I'm actually a piece of shit.

Even when I tried to fix things, she looked at me like I was crazy. I am ready to change for her but she doesn't believe a word of it.

"It doesn't matter anymore. She hates me and wants nothing to do with me so I've decided to give her her wishes and lay off. On Monday when I sign her severance check, she will officially resign from my company."

"Sounds like you've given up." He said while taking down some notes. What the hell was he writing? "How many packs of cigarettes have you smoked since our last session?"

"Multiple."

"Not good enough. I'm afraid I have to put you on an Inhalator."

"That's not happening. I'll stop. okay? Just give me time."

"How much time do you need Adam?"

"I don't know!" Maybe when I finally get Sophia out of my system... which is NEVER.

"Okay. How about we start by cutting down to 1 pack a week."

"I don't think I smoke up to that yet. But with the way things are going, I could get there."

"Good. So it's agreed, 1 pack a week. Now, what are you going to do about Sophia? You said you're not going to give up on her. So why are you letting her go?"

"Honestly I don't know." I sighed. "I can't force her to be with me. She can't even stand me. And like I said, I made matters worse. I need to lay off."

"But you're convinced about her feelings towards you?"

"Yes!"

"Then why would you lay off? It's only going to end up being another elastic band theory."

He's right. No matter what, I'll keep running back to her. I just know it.

"I have to give her her resignation at the very least, I don't want her to be miserable. But you're right, I shouldn't stop. I can still take a few more blows just for her."

"Alright then. With all that said, this session is now over."

We both stood up and shook hands

"I'll try not to fuck things up some more before our next session." I said and he laughed. "Hopefully, I don't do anything stupid and I come back with some good results."

"I hope so too."

I left the therapists' and drove home. I got a call from Paul Lewis with some update about our most recent liaison with AIRTEX.

Today was very busy. After meeting with their representative, I was invited over to the company itself to meet with the board of directors. Their main office was in Arizona but they have a branch here in New York. Our business deal was to provide them with 9 en route surveillance systems, in airport proximities and on the ground at airfields in Arizona. This is very huge and I'm glad I got to land a deal like this.

After that, I went for my weekly session of therapy and now, I'm back home.

I took the lift to my apartment. Once I got in, I poured myself a drink before I went to the balcony to relax and have a good view of the city. I took off my jacket and lit a cigarette.

My thoughts were running wild. Lately, I've been feeling lonely. I've gone to bed alone for months now and distracted myself all day with work. I have other people to talk besides the shrink, like my family. But they were all far away. Retired and living the dream in Spain. I was left with all the inheritance and the business to take care of.

But that was not the reason for my loneliness. It all boils down to one woman.

Ever since she crawled under my skin, I physically have not been able to be in the company of any other woman. She's the only one my mind and my body responds to now, like she cast a spell on me or something.

My only problem is getting her. How do I get her to see me as not a douchebag, but someone she can love and trust??