I was being smothered. Something was holding me down and I was drowning in it. I couldn't breathe through the heat and the weight. My nightgown was damp and clung to me as I kicked and fought against the weight on top of me.

"...ison....ddison....Addison!" Slowly the sound of my name, frantic and scared, broke through the haze of the fevered dream I was having.

A hand grabbed a hold of my arm and tugged me out of the grip of whatever held me. Cool hands wiped the sweaty hair back away from my face. I leaned into the touch. I felt safe.

"Addison?" they murmured. They began to pull away, but I pulled right back.

I was left leaning against a cool body in the darkness, as they ran their knuckles gently along my spine, reassuring me. "You're alright. You had a nightmare. I tried to wake you, but you couldn't hear me knocking. I wouldn't have come into the room if I'd had another option I'm sorry. Would you like me to turn the lights on?"

"Yes, please."

I felt his weight from the bed disappear and he got up. A soft beep and then suddenly the room brightened until I could see Esayr standing in front of me, a worried look on his face.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bother you." I brushed back the hair from my face. I was already sweating, but the heat from my blush made it even worse. Talk about seeing you at your worst. My thoughts were biting and they were right. None of what Esayr had seen of me had been at my best.

"It's never a bother to help you. Are you all right?" His gaze scanned the room as if looking for any threat.

My gaze scanned him in all of his shirtless glory, all the long lines of his arm and chest and the flat planes of his stomach to the sleep pants that had slid down just low enough to be dangerous. Addison, you do not look good enough to be ogling him right now you sweaty mess. I scrubbed at my face, "Yeah I'm fine. I just felt smothered." I turned an offended gaze to the bed, not sure exactly what was the problem.

"Was it the weighted blanket?"

What the hell is a weighted blanket? "Weighted blanket?"

"The covering on the bed. You were wrapped in it. It's designed to get slightly heavier throughout the night for comfort. It supposedly helps to relieve stress as well. I apologize I should have mentioned it."

"It's fine. I've just never really encountered anything like a heavy blanket before." Not like you really needed one, since you're from Florida anyway.

"No?"

"No. They're probably more expensive than I could afford, and I'm from a warm climate anyway so it really probably isn't a necessity. I wish it were so hot in the bed though." I watched him cringe at my words.

"Ah...I'm sorry. I should have mentioned that too." He stepped up the slatted headboard against the wall and pressed something on the side.

Even from my spot at the end of the bed, I could suddenly feel just the slightest refreshing coolness drifting down to touch my overheated skin.

Esayr looked abashed or maybe upset with himself, "I'm so sorry. I haven't done a good job helping you adjust. I've forgotten so many things."

"It's fine," you've forgotten so many things that were out of sight and out of mind because you're sleeping on the couch in an unfamiliar apartment because of me.

"It's not fine."

"Esayr," his name was a tired whisper, "it's fine, really. This is new all of it, to me and even to you. I'm sorry I woke you because of my dream."

"Don't be sorry. It's a pleasure to help you." He ran a hand through his hair. It was messy from sleep and the look of him tired and mussed was somehow dangerous and a little erotic.

I bit my lip, hoping the pain would keep me from thinking of such things, but his eyes focused on the minute movement. That bond between us pulled tight for a moment, making itself prevalent at the moment before slowly it loosened --only not quite all the way. "Esayr?"

His eyes were locked on my lips as I said his name, "Yes?"

"What time is it?"

That seemed to break him out of his trance, "Close to the beginning of the day cycle. Are you feeling well today?"

"Well enough now that I'm awake, why?"

"I was going to petition Prince Roan and Vailen for your right to speak to your Riniere and I was hoping to take you out to explore the Aarond Form today. I want you to see my home."

Nerves skittered in my stomach. It felt like I was being asked to meet his parents or something. What if the rest of the people on this ship didn't like me or something. I was a completely different race, surely that would cause some tension.

"Addison? I can feel that you're unsettled. If you'd prefer not to leave the ship we can avoid it."

Embarrassment replaced the nerves, "You can feel that?" How much else can he feel?

He nodded slowly, "I can feel many of your emotions quite easily. It's a byproduct of our bond and also my heritage. I guess you could say it's heightened. You're embarrassed by the idea."

My voice was quiet and unsure, "Yeah, I'm embarrassed. It stresses me out that you can just know what I'm feeling without me being able to stop it."

There was a sadness in his eyes because of my reluctance, "Thank you for sharing this with me. I do want you to know that the idea doesn't displease me and your feelings," he paused for a moment as if considering how he wanted to word what he was going to say, "I will never judge you for them."

"Not if I get unreasonably angry? Or if I get jealous of a woman I think is prettier than me? Or if I hate someone?"

"I would ask you the same of myself, but I can see where that would be hard to understand the comparison. I feel all those feelings just as you do, Addison. I was envious of males who went down to your planet before me. I was happy for them but deeper I was upset that I did not share their joy because somewhere deep inside I felt I should have been first. I've been angry at the leaders of our race because of their failure to push harder in our bargains with your governments. And, I've been conceited because I was right. We should have pressed harder and," he shot me a significant look, "I was right. I was supposed to be first." He had a dazzling smile when he decided to showcase it. All perfect straight white teeth with thankfully no fangs.

I cleared my throat, "What if I think...questionable things?"

"What kind of questionable things?"

I pulled my knees up to my chest, a subconscious protective gesture, "I-intimate things?"

He just looked confused.

I coughed again, trying to gain some kind of confidence to ask how to deal with these feelings, "What if I think, y'know, intimate things about you?" My cheeks burned and I settled for looking down at the floor instead of directly at him.

In my peripherals I could see him, his shoulder leaning against the doorway. He had this languid grace as he lounged there, looking for all the world like a sleepy god with bedroom eyes, "I've thought all manner of intimate things about you, Addison Kane, so I'm disinclined to judge you for them." His voice was gentle and coaxing.

"N-no I mean...how do I make them harder to feel. Harder for you to feel, I mean."

He swallowed, his throat bobbed with the motion, "I can help you with that if it would comfort you."

"Please."

He nodded sadly. "We will work on that tonight. But, for the rest of the day, would you like to explore the ship, or would you prefer to get more comfortable with this room while I speak with Vailen and Prince Roan?"

"Is it ok if I stay here? I want to see the ship with you, but I'm still...nervous. Can we go out tomorrow."

"Of course," he smiled to assuage some of the fear he probably felt trickling through the bond.

I realized I didn't want to disappoint him, "Tomorrow. I swear to you that I will let you show me around your home."

"Tomorrow."

*****A/N*****

I apologize for there being no update yesterday. I got suckered into friendship and didn't have any time to write afterward. I promise to make it up to you this week, as I'm actually off all week for Thanksgiving, surprisingly.

Again thank you so much for taking the time to give Esayr and Addison's story a chance.

With love,

Layla