I couldn't help the way my eyes ran over Zane's face in silent surprise.

Not only was I surprised that Zane had complimented me, I was surprised that his compliment consisted of so little words but had managed to make me feel so many things.

The first was a mild confusion. I knew Zane seemed to feel this annoying sense of duty to keep me alive and kicking, which was something that he needn't worry about in the first place. Yet, I had never felt the sense that Zane looked at me as any more than that.

The second was a tinge of self doubt. Even though Zane was staring back at me with nothing but sincerity in his expression, I couldn't help but wonder if his compliment was just another attempt at rescuing me from my own thoughts.

But the third was the most surprising of all, because I could only wonder if the small flurry of tingles that nestled deep in my stomach were what the books I used to read referred to as butterflies.

Either way, I couldn't find it in me to tell Zane that he was wrong. I knew what kind of girl I was, and I knew what kind of things boys noticed about me.

The bell ringing snapped me from my thoughts, and I became embarrassingly aware that I had been staring at Zane's face for the last minute. He didn't seem phased, as he was staring right back at me. I dropped my eyes down to the ground, watching as the ash from my cigarette gently danced around the small gravel as the wind gently blew.

And I felt something else I haven't felt in a long time- self conscious.

Zane cleared his throat as the moment was broken between us. "You heading to the cafeteria?"

A deep sigh left my lungs. Lunch was the only time during school where I actually have to be in proximity to Jax. Everything about him made my skin crawl. It's like his presence scratched every delicate part of my soul. In the worst way possible.

"We could, uh, grab something from somewhere else?" Zane asked me, and my eyes flicked back up to him in curiosity. "If you want."

I noticed that Zane seemed to read my thoughts before I even seemed to have them.

"Like what?" I asked him.

"Whatever you want, Seren." He responded with a small smile, and the sight of his smile alone made me feel like returning one.

"Yeah, alright." I shrugged, instead.

Zane looked like I had just told him he won the lottery, and I knew that he felt one step closer to saving my poor, tortured soul.

Again, I couldn't tell him how wrong he was.

He jumped to his feet, using his hands to dust the excess dirt off his dark jeans that comes with sitting on the concrete ground. He looked down at me and held his hand out, offering to help me up. I looked at it, debating on taking it, but he seemed to quickly notice my hesitation and shoved it back into his pocket.

I pulled myself up the wall, tugging on the ends of my short skirt, and followed him into the parking lot.

I couldn't help but notice the air of ease that Zane held. He walked without a doubt of his importance and place in the world. It was calming, almost. Though I doubted I emitted anything of the same sort any longer, maybe I could again.

We climbed into Zane's car, and as he started the engine and the audio roared to life, I noticed the frequency in which his eyes travelled to me. It made me feel guilty, in a sense. Almost as if he was concerned about my every move, like I would take the opportunity to strangle myself with the seatbelt if he wasn't present.

I quickly became aware that the songs playing through the expensive sound system were the same ones that he included on my playlist. As the song I had been so taken with yesterday in his car began to play, I couldn't hold back the small chuckle that escaped my lips.

Zane looked at me as he always did when I laughed, or showed any signs of life really, like I spouted an extra limb. But then, in a twist of events, his lips twitched up into his own smile.

"What's funny?" He asked me, moving his eyes between me and the road.

"It's nothing. I'm just surprised you are so supportive of my love for this song when it's about suicide." I told him.

"What?" His smile was gone now, and he looked like a kid who's parent had just told him Santa Claus wasn't real. "No, it's not."

"Yes. It is." I titled my head in confusion.

"No, it's not." He repeated. "What makes you think that?"

I couldn't tell if he was joking. "The words tell me that." His features remained in his look of puzzlement, so I continued. "She literally says I'm not coming back, I've done something so terrible, I'm at home in the clouds."

His face turned from confusion to shock, like he couldn't believe he hadn't put the two together in the first place, which only made me laugh again.

"So typical. For the man to only understand the male's perspective." I shook my head.

Zane scratched the back of his head. "I thought it was a love song."

"Maybe it is. Just a really tragic one."

Zane nodded and was silent for moment, like he was taking in my words. "You mind if we grab something from the drive through? I want to show you something."

I glanced at the time on my phone. I was partly concerned that we wouldn't make it back in time for class, but mostly I was concerned that I left my pills in my backpack. I opened my mouth to protest, but Zane spoke first.

"I think you'll really like it, Seren."

And he seemed so sincere, that instead of my protest leaving my lips, my head nodded instead.

It didn't take long before I was feeling a slight notion of regret. After getting food from the drive through, we had been driving out of town for the last fifteen minutes. I was certain we wouldn't be back in time for class now, and I was certain that my warm blanket of calm was dissipating and the ice was freezing through my veins once more.

We turned up a dirt road, and I was almost concerned for Zane's expensive sports car, as he had to slow to a crawl to allow the wheels to safely pass through the alarming amount of bumps and potholes.

"Almost there." Zane said as though he sensed my thoughts. And on par with the perfect timing that Zane seems to hold, he turned into a small clearing. It looked to be a tiny parking lot, but it was empty. Zane put the car into park, and quickly flung his door open. He grabbed the bag that contained our lunch, and hopped out. He seemed so confident in everything he did, like he didn't have to second guess his actions. He moved like he had nothing to hide, and no secrets to keep.

"You coming?" He asked, looking back into the car as he was about to close the door. I realized that I had been caught staring at him, again.

I followed him out of the car, and onto the narrow path that he had started down. The path, although fairly clear, seemed like it had been forgotten long ago. Maybe it was once full of life, with bounds of people creating their own footprints in it's dirt. I couldn't help but feel a sense of kinship with the path.

And then I realized that I was relating with a cleared out patch of forest, so maybe Zane had a reason to be concerned by me after all.

Eventually, the trees started to thin out, and as the path came to an end, a beautiful old wooden bridge came into view. It was built over a small river, and just over the tops of the remaining trees, you could see the distant cityscape on display.

"What do you think?" Zane had stopped and turned to me as though he was watching for my reaction.

"Its beautiful." I muttered, raking my eyes over the gorgeous place. I didn't want to miss anything, because it seemed every place I looked held a new sense of beauty. "I can't believe I've never been here before."

"I stumbled upon it almost two years ago." Zane told me as he dropped our food onto the flat surface of a large rock. In a single quick movement, he had pulled his hoodie over his head and placed it on the ground as you would a picnic blanket. He moved our food to his hoodie, and took a seat on the ground.

"Come eat." He patted the ground beside him, and I barely paused before joining him. I had to awkwardly lower myself onto the ground, resting my legs to the side of me thanks to my short skirt. My hands gripped the hem, making sure it didn't rise. I couldn't help but look over to Zane, once I was finally settled. I had expected his eyes to be lingering on my exposed legs, but my eyes found his, instead.

He handed me the wrapped sandwich from the bag, while I was left to wonder why he never seemed ashamed to be caught looking at me so completely.