《D for Depression》Chapter 33: Wild Thing
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''Say hello to my little friend.''
The words form deliciously between his lips and I catch myself staring at him intensely. There is something intriguing in the way he looks at me. It's almost provocative. He is practically challenging me to beat him at his own game.
My Joker.
You may be good.
But I'm better.
''Tony Montana, Scarface.''
His face contrasts in pure shock, wiping off the smug look he had on. I mirror him, pretending to be shocked, before I snatch another french frie from his plate.
Who's laughing now babe.
''Oh come on! Are you for real?'' He whines like a child for the 100th time.
''By the time we finish this game, I will have nothing left in my plate.''
I chuckle watching him pout. I swear he is a five year old trapped in a man's body.
My man.
A small smile forms on my lips, but I'm quick to hide it.
Wtf did I just say?
''What are you thinking?'' He asks, from the other side of the table.
''N-nothing.'' I stutter embarrassed.
''You looked pretty content with yourself over there.''
''No, I was-sn't.''
''Are you sure? Because I would swear some indecent thoughts were floating in your head.''
My face heats up listening to his words and I need to look away, before I embarrass myself farther.
Come up with something good Daphne.
''I was just thinking about your lame movie lines. I mean Scarface? Even my little cousin has seen this and he is twelve.''
He looks at me offended, before he digs into his plate catching a frie.
''Well I'm sorry Master D, I couldn't find something more creative. You have cornered me from the beginning.''
''This was your idea.'' I say laughing at how annoyed he looks by the fact that he is losing.
''Because I didn't know you are some kind of cinema genius.''
''Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you. We could try some animation lines instead. Maybe you have a better luck there.'' I say, dipping more of his fries in the ketchup.
''I don't like ketchup.'' He mumbles under his breath.
''I love it.'' I whisper, licking my finger without breaking the eye contact.
He stares at my lips, almost lost in a trance and I don't know what came at me, but I find myself swiping my thumb over them, spreading the remains of the fries salt. My tongue immediately gathers the crunchy texture, leaving my lips slightly irritated and puffy.
Jackson's gaze moves towards my eyes. Bending over the table he lets his elbows rest on top of it, casually staring at me. The confidence I had until now seems to vanish and I fidget anxious in my spot. His stare, almost too much for me to handle.
''Let's make a deal.'' He says, smirking.
''What kind of deal?'' I ask confused.
''I'll give you one more. If you find it you can ask me whatever you want.''
''You mean like a favor?''
''Favor, gift, question...anything.''
The last part catches my attention and I feel intrigued by this. ''Are you going to answer it? Whatever I ask?'' I say almost too interested.
''Yes.''
''Honestly?''
''Yes.''
The thought of being able to ask him openly about anything blows my mind. I don't even know what I will choose. About his past? The drug dealing? The scars on his chest? There are so many questions in my head, I feel I'm about to burst.
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''Okay. Let's do it.''
''Don't you want to know what I'll get in return if you lose?''
''I won't lose.'' I say, shaking my head.
''Someone's cocky.''
''No. I just know there is no way your film knowledge will expand farther than Godfather, Braveheart and Kill Bill.''
''Ouch.'' He says, touching his heart. ''That hurt baby.''
''Not my fault.'' I answer shrugging off my shoulders.
''Confident. I like it."
" Go on. "
''Okay.'' He says, tapping on his bottom lip.
I watch him, pretending he is thinking about a good quote, as if he hasn't already one in the back of his head.
One of the things I learnt about Jackson over the time we spent together, is that he always has a plan. There is no way he would offer me a deal, without knowing the exact line he was going to use. He likes to be one step ahead of things. And honestly, I don't mind it at all. No matter how crazy it may sound, this gives me some kind of security.
I am safe with him.
''Alright. Ready?''
''Yes.''
''Do or do not. There is no try.''
What?
''That's it?''
''Yep.'' He says carelessly.
''But...''
''What, you don't know it?''
''Give me a second.'' I answer stubbornly.
Think Daphne. Think.
There is no way you are losing this. It must be from one of this bloody gangster trash, that most men watch.
But no matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't find it. My mind was blank, like a tabula rasa.
Oh shit.
''You really don't know it.'' Jackson exclaims, surprised.
''I-I know it. I just need more time.''
''No, no. We didn't say anything about time baby. You answer now or you lose.''
He looks really satisfied with himself and I can't help, but let my competitive side take over.
''One more.''
''No. We agreed it was the last one.''
''Come on!''
''No.'' He says chuckling.
I huff annoyed crossing my hands under my chest, until a devilish idea comes into my mind.
I bent over the table, catching Jackson off guard. My hands stay locked under my chest, giving a little push to my cleavage. The sudden act drawing his attention.
I know my red polka dot dress had a great impact, considering how many times he said I looked beautiful in it and I'll make sure to milk it all the way.
''Please Jack.'' I whisper, biting on my bottom lip.
He gives me an attentive glance, eyes tracing my features slowly. Moving closer to me, I feel him caressing my face delicately, fingers brushing down my jaw. His thumb rests on top of my lips and I give a little kiss on the rough digit, that comes in total contrast with his soft touch. Grabbing on my jaw, he leaves a light peck on my lips, whispering a barely audible:
''No my love.''
And then he retreats back on his seat, a satisfied smirk across his face.
''You...'' I stammer over my own words.
''I'm awesome. I know.''
''You wish.'' I say, sarcastically, looking outside the window.
I can't believe I lost.
''Now that's not a way to talk to daddy.''
My expression seems to say it all, because Jackson laughs loudly, throwing a frie at my direction.
I can't believe he just said something like that in public. Checking around for anyone who could have listened to our conversation, I feel my cheeks heat up.
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There is no way I would have said such a thing sober. I don't even understand the people who use this type of ''language'' in a relationship. I mean, I called my own father daddy as a kid for God's sake. It's like sexualizing your parents. Straight up weird.
But I guess my drunk alter ego is a hormonal twisted lunatic, who enjoys calling other people daddy and spanking them on the butt.
I'm never drinking again.
''Relax babe. Your kink is safe with me.'' He says, patting his chest.
''I d-don't have a kink.'' I mumble embarrassed.
''Are you playing with yourself daddy?''
His words snap me out of my thoughts and I look at him shocked.
''What?''
Laughing again, he grabs my hand giving it a light squeeze. ''Don't worry about it. Are you ready to go?''
I nod reluctant, while he walks towards the bar to pay.
Five minutes later, we stand outside the pub, Jackson preparing his motorcycle.
''I would like to be the one who pays next time.'' I say, looking down my fingers.
Stopping what he was doing, he walks in front of it, staring at me with a smug look.
''So you're saying there is going to be a next time.''
My stomach drops at his words. Why I just assumed he would want to go out with me again?
This is only our second date. There is still time for him to go back, after realizing how crazy I am. I probably ruined his time with the whole ''movie nerd'' thing. Why can I not act normal? Like every other girl. Order a salad, ask him about his interests, focus on what he likes and just be on my best behaviour. Wtf is wrong with me?
''I'm playing with you baby.''
His hands find mine, tugging me towards him, while he rests against his motorcycle. I let him circle my waist, my eyes level with his jaw. I always find myself staring at his jaw somehow.
Can't say I complain.
''Now tell me. What are the plans for the next time?''
''I don't know..'' I mumble playing with the necklaces around his neck. ''I just want to thank you somehow. I don't like you spending your money on me.''
''Oh I can think of some ways to thank me.'' He whispers, above my head, his lips slightly touching my forehead.
My body tenses immediately and I feel the familiar heat of being close to him travel through my veins.
"You don't need to worry about the money. I want to take care of you. It makes me feel complete in a way. Like I finally serve my purpose."
His words flatter my heart, feeding the constant sense of security I have, when I am with him.
He got me. In every way possible.
"But I wanna take care of you too." I say slightly embarrassed.
Truth is, I want him to know he can depend on me too. This is not just one sided type of thing. We are in this together. And we are both equals.
My sentence is welcomed by silence and I need to avert my gaze from his torso to look into his eyes, searching for something, anything to give away his reaction.
But there is nothing. He stares ahead, lost in his own thoughts and I tug his necklace to get his attention back.
"What's going on?" I ask worried.
"Nothing." He shakes his head, hugging me closer to his body.
"Is it something I said?" I can't help but feeling conscious around him.
"No, no."
"Then what."
He stares at me for a second, hesitant of what to say. It almost seems as if he is in some kind of inner strugle and there is nothing I want more, than to help him get over it. But I know it's not that simple.
Instead I grab gently on his chain, dragging him slightly closer to me and leave a small kiss in the corner of his lips.
The acction seems to shake him up, from whatever thought he was having and soon, a bright smile takes over his features.
"You are going to take care of me?" He asks amused.
I nod, shivering by the way his rings brush across my skin.
"Okay baby."
"That means I'm treating next time?" I ask excited.
Laughing with my reaction, he pinches my cheek replying "Yes you are."
Jumping up and down my feet I hug him tightly, enjoying the way I fit into his arms.
"Thank you."
My words are muffled by his chest, and I sense him breathing me in once again.
"No baby. Thank you."
The rest of the night we spend it driving around town. My legs stayed locked around his hips, a precaution measure for my safety.
His words, not mine.
Although, I have to admit the fact that he used any opportunity to touch my leg, caress my thigh or squeeze my knee in every red light, kind of proves this was more for his satisfaction than my safety.
And you can bet I didn't have any problem with that.
I mean I always had a thing for rings and the rough edges were digging deliciously into my flesh, making me much more hot and bothered than it should.
I guess I do have some kinks.
All of them regarding Jackson.
But that's information I'll keep to myself.
For now.
''What's over there?'' I ask, nodding towards a small alley, where music and yells were echoing.
''Some sort of fair. Do you wanna go?''
Biting on my lip, I think about it. Truth is I don't like big crowds. The reason, I guess is pretty obvious. But as a kid, I used to love going there with my family. I would get on every ride and eat caramel apple or cotton candy. It's been a long time since I've done it.
Jackson's bike comes into a halt and I watch him jump off. ''Come on. Let's have a look.'' He says, offering his hand.
''Are you sure this is a safe place to leave your bike?'' I ask, looking around me.
''Don't worry about it. No one is going to touch it.''
"But..."
"Baby it'll be fine. Come on."
I hold his hand reluctant, following the sound of music blasting through the alley.
Soon, we find ourselves in front of an open park. A small fair is taking place, consisting of tents with shops, food trucks and other stunts, like shooting games or foosball tables. In the center of it, there is a big Carousel for the kids and behind it a ferris wheel.
Without even thinking about it, I drag Jackson behind me, heading towards the shooting booth.
"Look." I whisper, staring at the plushies.
"You like them?" He asks, amused.
"Them? No. But this one..." I nod towards the pink unicorn. "It's Agnes'."
Jackson looks confused, eyes flickering between the fluffy unicorn and me.
"Who is Agnes?"
A loud gasp escapes my lips and I glance at him shocked.
"Jackson." I mumble almost embarrassed for his ignorance.
"What?"
"Have you not seen Despicable Me?"
"No?"
"Jackson!" I scold him.
"Baby. " He whispers smiling at me.
"You really need to open your horizons. This is unacceptable."
"Says the girl who couldn't find the Star Wars quote."
"Was it Star Wars?"
"Of course. I'm surprised you didn't remember it."
Averting my eyes on the ground, I look around awkwardly.
"Wait. No..." He says, searching for my gaze. "You haven't seen it?"
I bite my lip, shaking my head instead.
"Are you for real?"
"Yeah. I'm not into science fiction."
"For shame. Daphne Stark has not seen Star Wars!" He exclaims, rather loudly.
"Stop it."
"Oh no baby. You don't get to mock me when you can't even recognize who Yoda is."
"I know who he is and if you don't stop, I'll splash you with that green paint over there, to match his color."
He looks at me stunned and I tap his chin to close the gap between his lips.
"That's our difference. Master J."
Daphne 1000000, Jackson - 10.
Ha.
"Miss do you wanna play?" The teenage boy interrupts us.
"Yes please. I want to try and get the big unicorn."
"Are you sure? You only have 3 shots and they are kind of difficult. The bigger the prize..."
"Yes I am." I cut him off smiling.
"OK." He mumbles, giving me the gun.
"Do you want me to get that for you?" Jackson asks casually.
"No. I don't."
He stares at me for a second, getting comfortable beside the counter.
"Let me see you babygirl."
My stomach drops listening to his words, but I don't let it get to me.
Taking the gun carefully in my hands, I aim for the target, feeling the familiar calmness envelope me once again. There is a moment of silence, when every sound around me gets blocked by my thoughts and I find myself alone in an open field.
This is it.
One
Again.
Two.
Almost there.
Three.
I hear voices speaking, clapping and whistling. It must be a crowd. I can't be sure.
There is that smell of old wood and mud, combined with fresh soap.
It's odd.
But surprisingly comforting.
I wanna stay a little longer.
"Daphne."
No.
"Hey."
Just a little bit.
"Babe."
And suddenly, I'm pulled back into reality.
"Hey. Calm down."
I watch Jackson caressing my face, the coldness of his rings smoothing me down.
"Is there something you can't do?" He asks, smiling at me.
"What?"
"You made history over there. No missed shots."
My eyes drift to the kid looking at me like an alien, while he passes me the pink unicorn. There are some people gathered around us, all of them commenting how clear my shots were, but I'm too out of place to answer their questions.
"You got yourself a tough one huh?"
Someone says to Jackson and I sense him stilling beside me.
"I would watch my back if I were you. She might kill you in your sleep if you get on her bad side."
"Yeah. Did you teach her how to hold that gun?"
The blonde guy chuckles along his friends, making me squirm uncomfortably.
"Oh no, I didn't have to." Jackson says, stepping down the booth.
"She did it herself. Much better than what half of your pathetic little group could. And right now, you three are competing for a place in her bad side. Now if I were you, I would start apologising, before she puts a hole in that excuse of a dick you have, cutting off all the chances for reproduction of your pathetic kind."
My jaw hangs open from his words and I move forward to stand beside him.
"Relax dude. We were just joking around."
"I don't." Jackson responds firmly, towering over them.
His aura alone is enough to shut everybody down,creating a sultry atmosphere. Another side of the so- called "Jackson effect."
I honestly feel bad for them. They look so intimidated by his presence. And he only talked to them once.
Wait and see him without a shirt, talking about a punishment.
Damn it Daphne.
What the hell is wrong with your head?
"Jackson, it's okay." I mumble, tugging at his arm.
"Yeah listen to her." The blonde guy says and Jackson clenches his jaw.
"You are still talking, but you aren't say the right things. Last chance."
"Are you fuckin..."
"We are sorry." His friend says, looking frightened at me.
I open my mouth to speak, but Jackson beats me to it.
"Good. Your turn now." He nods towards the other one.
"I am not..."
"He is sorry." His friend interrupts him, squeezing his bicep.
I watch them carefully, sensing the light sift in the atmosphere.
"Yeah.." He says after a moment or two.
"Yeah what?" Jackson pressures.
"I'm sorry." He spits clearly, unwillingly.
"Are you accepting their apologies babe?"
My head turns, meeting Jackson's heating gaze. And I just know if I say no, they are not going to make it out of here in one piece.
"Yes."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes."
''I guess you got lucky. Off you go.'' Jackson dismisses them with a nod and I exhale relieved.
As soon as they go, my body turns towards him, looking with what I hope is a judgemental look. ''You didn't have to do that.''
''Do what?''
''Start a fight with them.''
''They brought this to themselves darling, the moment they start commenting about you.''
''It wasn't worth it.'' I mumble.
''Everything that relates to you is worth it.''
His statement shuts me up and I look away shyly. I can't even be mad with him at this point. He got me wrapped around his finger.
''Besides, it was you with the killer moves that scared them away. Not me.'' He says jokingly, making me laugh.
''I doubt that.''
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