《You Only Smol Twice: A Smol Detective Story》Chapter Eight

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Rgrarshok touched Oscar on the shoulder just outside Rrre'nansh's office. "{[Oscar], can you hold back a bit?}"

Valentin stopped as well. The neutral mask he'd worn in front of the governor now slipped back into its usual suspicious squint. "What is problem? Has to do with Egg?"

At the moment, the Commander and his underlings were still in the dark with respect to the Egg's contents. Rgrarshok had insisted on that, with the unspoken implication to Oscar that she needed to keep her nose clean due to the Dorarizin Inquisition worming their way into this affair. Valentin had accepted her denial with a pessimistic shrug, and thus far hadn't pressed the matter.

The Captain nodded towards him. "[Nothing regarding that, I assure you. This is an internal matter.]"

Oscar glanced at Valentin and gave him a little nod. With that nod, he tried to get across the message of If it's important, I'll tell you later.

Valentin let out an annoyed grunt, turned, and stalked off down the hall muttering Slavic curses under his breath.

"What's this about?" asked Oscar. "Is it about Benny? I hope he's okay, he was pretty stressed-out after the sting went down."

"[His scent is still troubled, but he should recover soon enough,]" replied Rgrarshok. She actually winked at Oscar. "[Especially after I, heh, 'relax' him tonight.]" Before he could register any astonishment at her unexpectedly lewd statement, she plowed on. "[No, this is about the Inquisition.]"

"Aw, crap."

"[You said it. I've just received word that they've sent a Veridicator. Her shuttle will be arriving in orbit in several [hours], after which she'll immediately transfer to the Claw.]"

Oscar paused before asking the obvious question. His team pursued those who'd broken Senate laws, and thus far he'd only gotten a cursory understanding of the Inquisition and how it slotted into the overall politics of the Dorarizin Empire. Most of his current knowledge consisted of the statement If You Value Your Balls, Keep Them Very Far Away From The Inquisition.

"What is a Veridicator, exactly?" he asked.

The Captain filled him in while they walked towards the shuttle.

"Aw, crapola."

Oscar followed Valentin and the adjutant into the stockade; his nerves were still jangled from the Captain's news. Tobias looked up from his clasped hands; the ringleader looked to be in the middle of a silent prayer. Thora and Tam sat or stretched out as best they could in the cramped cell, while Jaime paced in a little circle nearby.

"So what's the news?" asked Tobias.

"Pizzeria is closed," said Valentin. "Official story is problem with health inspection. You four will be turned over to this one's crew." He pointed his thumb back at Oscar. "You tell them everything you know, in return they will drop you off at Earth. Permanent exile, will not be allowed back into space."

"We'll also take steps to make sure Martin's unable to harm you or your loved ones," added Oscar.

Thora sat on the floor, her back propped up against the cell's bars and with her previous sneer gone. She relaxed a bit at Valentin's words. "No charges pressed?"

"None on either end," replied the Commander. "Colony governor wants to keep this quiet."

Jaime stopped his pacing and looked up. "What about the Senate?"

Valentin looked back at Oscar with a questioning eyebrow.

"At the moment, the Senate has left any prosecution to Governor Rrre'nansh's discretion," said Oscar. "He, in turn, wants this treated as a state secret. In his eyes, if the four of you show the appropriate zeal in getting the Egg back then he'll accept exile back to Earth as sufficient punishment."

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Tam shook her head. "I don't like it. What if we do as you ask and you still don't get the Egg back? You could just turn around and tell the governor that we didn't play nice. We'd wind up right back here, but this time in a cell with aliens."

"It won't be up to me or my pack," replied Oscar. "Your performance will be judged by a more neutral authority, and that's all I can say right now."

"Judged by neutral authority, and also by me," added Valentin.

"Wait, what?" Oscar stepped around to face the Commander. "You didn't tell me that."

"I have great many issues to discuss with my superiors," said the Commander. "Your ship is best method at moment to achieve that, da? Besides, Stepan here is quite capable of running things in my absence."

Valentin nodded towards his adjutant and the big man just grunted in response.

Oscar looked over at the shaved gorilla, then back down at Valentin. "You do realize this is not like stepping onboard a cruise liner, right? Dorarizin are pretty...um, they don't really believe in personal space. I've been around them long enough to make them pretty nose-blind to our smell, but you will need to get scented eventually."

There was something else, something that gnawed at the base of Oscar's brain. He'd forgotten one very important bit of information, but whatever it was eluded his conscious mind at the moment.

The Commander shrugged. "Will deal with whatever necessary. Have already told your Captain."

"'aight." Oscar turned to the four prisoners. "Satisfied?"

Tobias stood. "As much as I can be. All right, then. Quid pro quo. We'll tell you what we know, in exchange for exile for the four of us."

Thora looked around at the metal corridor of the Claw. Oscar was right at her shoulder, with Bgrarh's much larger figure taking point. Thus far Bgrarh had not spoken a single word to the four prisoners. Behind them stalked Myrreh, her body language making it clear that she really hoped one of the spies would make a break for it. None of them were stupid, so thus far none had.

"So does your brig have the appropriate drippy ceiling with chains on the walls?" Thora asked. "I think we should be sticking to the classics."

"[It'll be more comfortable than you deserve,]" growled Myyreh.

Thora glanced behind her. "What's got you so wound up?"

"Drop it," said Oscar. "You inflicted emotional distress to one of her pack. Be grateful she's only going to snipe at you verbally."

The blonde woman looked to the front again, towards Bgrarh's broad back. One corner of her mouth curled up, and Oscar knew she was about to start needling his friend again.

He placed a hand on her shoulder. "I said drop it."

Her smirk didn't go away. "Or what?"

"Or I will tie you up and tape your mouth shut."

Thora looked in defiance at Oscar, but saw no hint of bluffing in his eyes. She looked away and allowed herself to be led along with no further verbal sparring.

As it turned out, the temporary 'human' brig set up on board the Claw was a suite of several dormitory-style rooms leading into a common area. The latter now held the four captives, who sat on a curved sofa in the middle of the room facing Oscar. He pointed behind him at the only door out of the place. "We'll be monitoring the lot of you twenty-four seven. If you need something, sing out and if the item's allowed then the drones will bring it to you."

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Thora crossed her arms. "What about our mandated media time?"

Oscar smiled. "That's meant for solitary humans assigned to an all-xeno position. There's three other humans here to talk to, so y'all have fun figuring out who's got the top bunk."

He turned and headed out the door, which slid shut behind him with a satisfying and solid thunk. Next, he checked the control screen next to the brig. The lock's code was already active, as it should be. But Oscar remembered a time not too long ago, when a few crazy Karnakians had gone and bypassed a lot of the Claw's security systems. Oscar had picked up enough programming in the last two years after that to add on his own separate security code. If anybody tried to take out one of the prisoners without disarming that code, it would raise holy hell.

Satisfied, Oscar turned and headed back for the hangar. Now all he needed to do was figure out what had his subconscious so riled up. By the time he reached the cavernous space, Valentin's shuttle had already departed. The imperturbable Slav stood next his one large duffel while he shook hands with the Captain. At the moment, he wore only a set of unmarked camouflage fatigues.

"Appreciate you accommodating me on such short notice," said Valentin.

"[It's no trouble,]" said the Captain. "[We're already retrofitted for [human] life support anyway. Egwreh's almost finished setting up your quarters.]"

Oscar jogged up to the pair. "What about our other guest?"

"[She should be arriving in a [few minutes].]"

Valentin raised one eyebrow as he looked at Oscar. "This is the neutral party you mentioned?"

Oscar blew out a breath and nodded. "Oh, yeah. It sounds like she's gonna be a real barrel of laughs. We should get out of here so they can start depressurizing the hangar."

Instead, the main entry door to the rest of the Claw slid open and the the crew started filing in.

"[The Veridicator didn't want to waste time on such a thing,]" said Rgrarshok. "[She's coming across in a suit through the personnel airlock.]" She turned and raised her voice into a near-shout. "[Attention, people! Present for inspection!]"

With a brief and apologetic nod to Valentin, Oscar trotted off towards the forming line of his comrades. As he jogged, he made a few surreptitious adjustments to his uniform to ensure that all was as per Dorarizin regulations. By now inspection was old hat, and without thinking he was able to line up properly with those on either side of him.

The Captain stalked down the line, reaching out to tweak an errant bit of clothing here and there. Oscar received a little fussing of his own, but nothing which made the Captain break her stride. Finally she turned and regarded them all. "[Good. After she is on board, we break orbit ASAP. We have the package information from our other, heh, guests, along with the name of the cargo ship it left on. We're going to try to get ahead and intercept it.]"

As she finished speaking, a chime sounded through the hangar. The noise came from the smaller door next to the hangar's main shuttle-sized airlock. Oscar realized that the Veridicator had entered the airlock without needing to ask for permission. Such a flaunting of her privilege made him wonder if she was the Dorarizin equivalent of Martin.

The inner airlock door slid open and the Veridicator entered, clad in a pressure suit of purest white. She was tall but more slender than Oscar had expected, with a build that put him in mind of a Dorarizin marathon runner. The suited figure reached up and twisted off her helmet with a soft hiss of equalizing pressure.

Her fur was just as spotlessly white as her suit; her sharp amber eyes scanned the hangar like a machine. Thanks to Rgrarshok's briefing, Oscar now knew what lay behind those eyes. From the time she was young, this person was put through rigorous training both physical and mental that honed her ability to detect the small 'tells' which indicated Dorarizin falsehood. As if that wasn't enough, she also bore within her body a separate cybernetic nervous system. The latter keened her senses to near supernatural levels. If the Veridicator's organic brain missed something, it was a sure thing that the other system would not.

When she spoke, her voice was soft and husky. "[Hnrahnan-of-Narzghr, Senior Veridicator, reporting as ordered by the Inquisition of the Dorarizin Empire. Permission to come aboard?]"

"[Permission granted,]" replied Rgrarshok as she lumbered forward. To Oscar's surprise, the two embraced. The smaller Dorarizin all but vanished within the Captain's hug.

"[It's been too long,]" said Hnrahnan.

"[Indeed, far too long. You're looking well,]" replied the Captain.

They broke apart, and Hnrahnan smiled. She gestured up-and-down at Rgrarshok's much bigger body. "[And you're looking as healthy as ever.]"

The Veridicator stepped back and touched a few points on her suit, which obligingly unfolded itself away from her body. Underneath she wore a pale blue uniform with no insignia. Her pressure suit continued to fold itself into a compact package which the Veridicator then dropped into her helmet.

"[I fear I had to travel light,]" said Hnrahnan. "[The suit's all I have on me.]"

"[We can fab up anything you need,]" said the Captain. She swept a paw at the assembled crew. "[Did you wish to perform an inspection?]"

The Veridicator nodded an ear. "[I'm sure all is as it should be, but I should at least introduce myself.]"

The newcomer walked down the line of crew, shaking hands and getting names. When she came to Oscar she paused and smiled wider. "[I'd heard that Rgrarshok was able to get a [human] on her crew, but I didn't believe it!]" She reached out a paw for a handshake, her eyes still calculating in spite of her friendly manner.

Oscar privately called bullshit on her words. He knew this person knew everything about him up to and including his underwear size. Outwardly he smiled back and shook her paw. "Investigator Oscar Williams, Ma'am. Pleased to meetcha."

She gave his hand a little squeeze, then dropped it and moved on. Oscar had expected her to be a flinty-eyed hard-ass on the level of a Puritan witchfinder. Now he knew she was even more dangerous. She was the type who used an outward jovial manner to get her prey to drop their guard.

Hnrahnan reached the end of the line and tilted her head curiously at the one remaining person in the hanger. Valentin stood off to one side of the line of crew, his arms crossed and a bemused expression on his face.

"Commander Maksimov," he said in response to the unspoken question, and stuck out a hand.

"[The Commander's been very helpful to our investigation,]" said Rgrarshok as the Veridictor took Valentin's proffered hand. "[He'll be assisting us if we have to deal with certain bureaucratic elements on Earth.]"

"[Ah, I see.]" She smiled even wider at Valentin. "[A pleasure to meet you.]" Hnrahnan's husky voice went even deeper at that last word, she almost sounded...distracted?

"[I was excited enough to meet one [human], I didn't think I'd be meeting two in the same day!]" She didn't drop Valentin's hand. The Commander's taciturn face started to look a little puzzled. Hnrahnan looked down at the duffel next to Valentin's feet, and her ears perked up even more.

"[Oh! You just arrived as well?]" Her tail started to wag.

"...da?"

"[You must let me escort you to your quarters!]"

Oscar's puzzlement grew. This was not any schmooze-the-suspects routine; the Veridicator now sounded positively chipper.

"Is not necessary, madam." Valentin tried ever-so-politely to withdraw his trapped hand, but that particular appendage might as well be buried in cement. With her other paw, Hnrahnan reached out and fussed at his fatigues, smoothing out what few wrinkles there were.

"[Can you send me a map of the ship, please?]" asked the Veridicator. "[I'll take him to his quarters and then drop my suit off in mine.]"

Rgrarshok's head tilted in puzzlement, but she must have done as asked since Hnrahnan's face lit up in genuine glee from the information flowing into her implant. "[Wonderful! Let's be off.]"

"Madam, I assure you that's not necessaryyyyy..." Valentin let out a surprised yelp as the Veridicator scooped her free paw under his thighs. In an eye-blink the Commander found himself cuddled against her chest.

The Captain stood frozen, clearly torn between wanting to intervene but also not wanting to wrestle someone who outranked her. "[Hnrahnan, what are you...]"

The Veridicator clasped Valentin tighter to her, earning another protesting yelp from her now-captive. "[He's tired! He needs his rest!]" She spun and jogged for the hangar entrance...well, her species called it a jog, whereas to a human it looked more like a flat-out sprint. The door slid obediently open at her approach, then closed behind her rapidly-wagging tail.

Rgrarshok shook herself as if awaking from a nightmare. "[What.]"

Oscar smacked his own face with his palm. "Shit. Scenting. That's what I kept forgetting. The Veridicator's not used to human scent like the rest of you guys. She was going to react to him right away."

The Captain actually looked upset. "[How could I have forgotten that? Taking care of everyone is my job!]"

Oscar held up a palm. "It's okay, Captain. We've all been running around trying to deal with ten things at once. Now. How much danger is Valentin in?"

Ngralh looked a little less stricken than the Captain. "If you mean physical danger? Not much. My guess is she's got him in her quarters, making a nestpile for him. Give her a couple of hours and she'll be calmed down enough to let him go."

Oscar groaned into his hand. "Fuck. Valentin is gonna be soooo pissed."

Valentin sat with crossed arms as he tried to ignore the giant wolflike being whose lap he currently occupied. Claws that could rend steel instead combed gently through his slicked-back hair, neatening what was already neatened. He'd long ago given up verbal pleading as useless, so now he sat in grumpy silence. All the while, his ears resounded with an array of clicks and growls which his commbead dutifully translated.

"[...oh, yes, that's much better. Now you must lie down and close your eyes. You need your sleep, my dear.]"

"Not sleepy, madam," He tried not to grind his teeth at his ridiculous and yet still terrifying situation.

"[But you must be! Here, I'll lie down with you...]"

His position became even more ridiculous as Hnrahnan all but fell over in her denpile, dragging Valentin onto his side. Within moments he found himself swaddled in fur-covered muscle as she hugged him to her, acting Very Definitely as the big spoon.

"[Yes, that's good, I need to keep you safe and warm.]" Her paw stroked his scalp. "[Sleep now...]"

Valentin couldn't deny that her snuggling was comfortable. But sleep was the farthest thing from his mind as he racked his brain, trying to figure out her strange behavior. Wait...there was something he remembered from his briefings, something about how Dorarizin visiting the base had to wear special nose-plugs before entering. And then there was Oscar's mention of 'scenting'.

His commbead gave a soft, unobtrusive chime before Oscar's voice sounded in his ear. "Valentin? If you're hearing this, don't freak out. Hattie's running on instinct, her hind-brain is telling her you're an abandoned youngster. We...well, we screwed up and forgot that she hasn't been around humans. The Captain's going to come in and try to get her to let you go. Don't worry, you're not in any danger."

Now Valentin did grind his teeth. No danger? He was currently in the embrace of a creature shich could tear him apart like a loaf of bread. A creature that was acting on pure instinct, it seemed.

Hnrahnan's furred arms tightened fractionally around him. "[Why are you so frightened? You reek of fear.]" Her jet-black nose snuffled into his scalp. "[Don't worry dear, [momma] is here to protect you...]"

Her voice trailed off. "[By the First Pack, what am I doing?]"

Valentin was very glad to hear some calculated reasoning come back into her voice. "Wish I knew, madame," he replied.

The door slid open to reveal an empty corridor. Captain Rgrarshok ever-so-carefully poked her head around the edge, taking in the scene within Hnrahnan's quarters. To Valentin's eternal gratitude she didn't snicker or even crack a smile.

"[Veridicator? May I enter?]"

Hnrahnan paused for a very long while before replying. "[You may.]"

Moving with the same exaggerated care, Rgrarshok stepped around the doorframe and walked into the Veridicator's quarters. Valentin didn't have a Dorarizin's nose but he could almost smell the stench of embarrassment from his current furry captor. He felt his fear abate somewhat, and figured that he'd try to defuse the situation with a bit of humor.

He looked up at Rgrarshok from within the cradle of Hnrahnan's arms. "Is not what it looks like, I swear."

The Captain's mouth turned up at one corner, and even Hnrahnan snickered once.

"[Can you let him go, please?]" asked Rgrarshok.

In response, the Veridicator opened her arms. Valentin tried to look dignified as he stood up and wobbled to the edge of the denpile. His once-straight fatigues were now very much in disarray from all of the cuddling. He glanced back at Hnrahnan, who now sat up in a cross-legged position in the middle of the denpile as she regarded her paws. The fingers on those paws twitched, and he realized the Veridicator was suppressing mightily the urge to reach out and grab him again.

"[Just get him out of here, please,]" she growled. "[I need to clear my nose.]"

Valentin was all too happy to oblige her.

After some hasty scenting from Bgrarh, Valentin was declared to be no longer a danger to the dignity of a Senior Veridicator. They all convened in the Claw's rec lounge, with Valentin doing his best to stand as far away from everyone else as possible.

Veridicator Hnrahnan stood in front of the main holographic display. She was upright as a Dorarizin could get, and her voice held no trace of embarrassment.

"[Thank you for your understanding of my recent behavior. I should have thought of the scent problem myself, but my orders were issued at the last moment.]"

Valentin cleared his throat. He'd straightened his hug-rumpled fatigues back into neatness and now stood with a gimlet eye that dared anyone to so much as crack a smile over the recent debacle. "Pressed Captain to be on board at last moment myself, no way for you to know I was here. We call it a learning experience for everyone, da?"

Hnrahnan gave him a shallow bow in reply.

Oscar decided to act as the ignorant yokel. "Speaking of your orders...what are they? If you can tell us, of course."

The Veridicator's return gaze was steady and unreadable. "[A polite way of asking what the teasing prey-stink I'm doing here, eh? My presence is to demonstrate to the Senate that the Dorarizin Empire is taking this affair very seriously, and that their orders to you are carried out to the letter.]"

Oscar kept his face neutral and hoped that the Veridicator's lie-detection didn't extend to humans. The crew had already disobeyed those orders by telling him of the Egg's contents, and he hoped their bluffing game was on point.

"[Can you give us some idea of what's going on in the Senate?]" asked Ngralh. "[We haven't heard much.]"

Hnrahnan sighed. "[I can't tell you everything, but I can say that it's devolving into a squabble about what to do next. The Empire's senators are leaning towards public disclosure of the theft and a public retrieval of the item in question.]" Her eyes flicked over to Valentin.

"[He knows what [Oscar] knows,]" said Rgrarshok in reply to the unspoken question.

"[Very well. The [Jornissians], on the other hand, want to give local democracy a chance. They're following Governor [Rrre'nansh's] lead on keeping the theft quiet. They insist that any attempts to retrieve the Egg must be done with no publicity. On the third hand, the [Karnakians] are just happy that for once they're not the ones who screwed up. They're also leaning towards secrecy, so for the moment that's how we need to pursue this matter.]"

"What about humans?" grunted Valentin.

"[At the moment, the [human] senators have recused themselves from any decision. My understanding is that they wish to avoid any hint of conflict of interest.]"

Valentin's face settled into a scowl. "My superiors claim that there was no higher-level authorization for this nonsense."

Hnrahnan bowed once more to him. "[So they claim. They still wish to avoid any accusations of profiting off of it.]" She then bowed to the room in general. "[I assure you, my only desire is to assist you. Captain Rgrarshok is still in overall charge of the investigation.]"

Oscar crossed his arms as he wondered just how true that statement was.

Valentin managed to corral Oscar on the way back to the latter's quarters. "What is she up to?" asked the Commander without preamble.

Oscar leaned against the nearest bulkhead and let out a grumbling sigh. "My guess right now? Exactly what she said. Veridicators have a reputation for telling the truth and nothing but. It balances out the fact that she will follow her orders to the letter, no matter what the consequences are."

"She stinks too much of a zampolit..." began Valentin, only to be silenced by an upraised finger from Oscar. He touched his ears, then motioned at the air around them.

Valentin gave a grim nod. "Understood."

Oscar figured that there was one big advantage to working with Russians; they started out with a built-in paranoia when it came to politics.

"Just follow my lead. Okay, Valentin?"

The Russian half-smiled and patted Oscar on the shoulder as he walked away. "Valya."

Oscar turned towards Valentin as he left. "Really?"

Valentin chuckled. "Just spent an hour being embraced by one of them. Nearly pissed myself the whole time. But you...you actually have one of them as your malishka. Must admit, you are braver man than I."

The Commander strolled off down the corridor without looking back.

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