《How Do Centaurs Wear Pants?》Guiana, not Guinea

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It had taken over two hours to finally wriggle myself away from the family. They had insisted on family bonding time, even though dad and grandma were taking turns looking at me with disappointment and sadness. It took me insisting on playing Monopoly and that it would "totally be fun this time" for my dad to pretend he was getting tired and my grandma to suddenly develop a backache that she needed to rest.

I collapsed backwards on my bed, letting out a long, frustrated sigh. What a day… that didn't go well. It had not been a good day and tomorrow wasn't looking promising either. I wanted to spend time with my grandparents, but this trip had been tainted. They had looked so forward to attending the graduation ceremony and not being able to have that experience had released the wind from their sails. Yet, I was still certain that it was primarily Dr. Swendle's fault, if he had followed what he had written exactly, then there could be no question that what I had written was applicable for the assignment. I supposed there were options I could look into such as appealing the decision to a higher power. If his ex-wife was truly the head of the biology department, perhaps she would take some glee in helping with the case. It did feel wrong to even think about manipulating the situation using that avenue, but if it worked, I thought it might be worth it in the end.

My phone buzzed in my pocket, three long dashes, a new email. The chances were high that it was just some sort of spam for some rewards program I had long forgotten, but something in my gut told me to take a look anyway. Pin entered, I swiped over to my college mail app and opened a new email from a Dr. Phillips. The name seemed vaguely familiar, but I couldn't exactly place where I had seen it before.

"Dear Ms. Elsie Jones,

I had the pleasure of having a look over your paper on the theoretical biology of the centaur. Unfortunately, I did not have much time with the document, but from what little I did read, I think you have some very fascinating ideas. I would like to discuss your ideas and propose a solution to your academic dilema. In the interest of expediting our communication, I have included my personal cell number below, please feel free to text or call me at your earliest convenience."

The email both excited me and made me feel uneasy. On the one hand, Dr. Swendle hadn't just been exaggerating when he said he had passed my paper around, but on the other, it may have ended up in the hands of someone who was genuinely intrigued by it. I absolutely hated the idea that my hard work and intense research had resulted in the document being passed around for laughs, but most scientists who discovered something science-shattering hadn't been accepted or welcomed at first. Perhaps Dr. Phillips was my first contact with someone willing to give my scientific research a honest chance. It only took about thirty seconds after my first text for the professor to respond.

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"Ms. Jones, I am very glad that you got back in touch with me. I absolutely hate that I must insist we make quick decisions, but I'm afraid that I must ask that you be willing to make some rather large choices with not a lot of time to consider them. Perhaps it may be best if we spoke on a call."

I had no idea where this was going, but there was a flutter of excitement in my stomach. I quickly hit the call button and put the phone to my ear.

"I'm glad to see you are excited," the professor said with a low laugh.

I didn't know why it surprised me that the voice was distinctly feminine, but I had been picturing a man.

"I'm excited that someone recognized the time and effort I put into that paper," I answered. "Dr. Swendle certainly did not."

"Yes, well, I'm afraid my colleagues are not quite up on the very leading edge of modern biology," she explained with a wry edge to her voice. "They are still relying on information textbooks and journals that were published a decade or more ago, thus they mainly research and teach things as we thought they once were, not what we are discovering in the present."

The more she spoke, the more I liked her style. This was exactly the type of attitude I had been hoping to find during my college experience, unfortunately I had not been able to find it until I was pretty much done.

"That's where you come in." She paused for a moment and there was the sound of a keyboard clacking and a mouse clicking. "Dr. Swendle mentioned that if your paper was not some bad idea of a joke that you would not be passing, is that correct?"

"Yes." It was hard to hide the bitter in my voice.

Dr. Phillips chuckled lightly, the clicking of the mouse followed it. "I would like to offer you a chance at fulfilling your credit requirement for graduation with an independent study course. We could make the title or description fit whatever gap you were filling with Biology 302."

"That would be great, though it's too bad I won't be able to graduate on time still," I lamented.

The professor hummed on the other end and strummed her fingers on the desk in front of her. "What if - and I can't guarantee this will work - but I say that I completely forgot to submit the paperwork for the course back at the start of the semester. I will turn on water works, fret, seem desperately upset that I have perhaps stalled your graduation due to my mistake."

I was speechless. I had never met this person and yet they were willing to forge an entire class on my transcript so that I could graduate on time.

"You still there?"

"Yeah," I said, "sorry. I just don't know what to say. Wouldn't that get you in trouble?"

"Only if I got caught." The tone of her voice said that she had done this kind of thing before. "In reality, no one really takes the time to audit classes and ask for proof of student work. I'm certain I'm not the only professor that has ever helped a student fill some sort of credit requirements at the last second. Besides, you will owe me and I think I have plenty of work I would like help with."

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There was the catch, I knew there had to be one. This wasn't just some act of charity, she wanted something out of the deal.

"What do you need help with?" I asked. I hoped she wasn't going to ask me to spend the summer rearranging her files or editing the citations for her next published article.

She hesitated with her answer, but eventually said, "I need you to come on a field research trip with me. I know this is short notice, but we would leave in two days and I need your answer in about five minutes so that I can book the tickets."

She really wasn't kidding when she said that I wouldn't have much time to give her an answer. I would graduate if I agreed, but I wouldn't be able to go to the ceremony. I supposed that the actual ceremony didn't really matter, as long as I got my degree.

"Where would we be going? Also, how long will we be gone and what exactly are we going to be doing there?"

I had five minutes for questions, I was going to use them.

"French Guiana," she answered. "I plan on being gone for a couple months, depending on what kind of leads we find, but I do have to be back by the time fall semester starts. As for what we're doing, let's just say that it directly correlates with the topic of your paper."

My heart beat increased and I started feeling jittery, it was finally happening! Someone was not only taking me seriously, but they had the means to actually do the science that was necessary. I already could imagine myself deep in the rainforests of South America hunting down cryptids while collecting samples and documenting everything. Before I even realized what I was doing, I blurted out that we had a deal.

"Fantastic!" she exclaimed with a deep sigh of relief. "I'm not the only one doing a favor here, I needed a student to accompany me for the department to foot the bill for the trip. Which reminds me, don't breathe a word of what we might actually be doing there. As far as you know this is a sample collecting trip of potentially undiscovered flora species."

"I won't say a word," I promised.

"I just clicked to purchase the tickets and I will start right away on drawing up an official looking class description. Just make sure you have your passport and I will text you the details of where we will be meeting at the airport once I get everything completely set up."

"I don't know how to thank you." I felt like I owed her some big, elaborate speech thanking her and telling her exactly how excited I was.

"You can thank me later by letting my name be first on the articles we're going to write." Her voice was sing-song, she was just as happy as I was with how this was turning out.

"You got it," I laughed.

We ended the call and I was left feeling like my body was buzzing with energy, hands and feet feeling like I had to move them. Leaping off my bed, I threw open my bedroom door and yelled into the hallway that we needed to hold a family meeting. I skipped to the living room and began to pace excitedly in front of the couch as I waited for my bewildered family to appear.

"What's going on?" my dad said with a tinge of fear in his voice.

"Great news, I am graduating!" I exclaimed with a clap of my hands.

My dad's face transformed into a look of shock and my grandma let out an excited gasp.

"Just like that?" dad asked. "Did the professor change his mind?"

"Something like that," I said with a grin, "actually another professor decided that my paper was worthy of passing and will be letting me complete an independent study course with them."

"Wait, darling, a professor liked your paper?" Grandma gave my dad a concerned look. "Elsie, we love you, but are you sure this professor is serious?"

"She has already booked the plane tickets for our field research trip," I explained. "This is very real and serious."

All three of them dropped their jaws open and looked to each other as if to verify that they had all heard the same thing. Their excited faces due to the news I was graduating had faded into concern.

"The only problem is that I have to leave before the actual graduation ceremony." I continued talking since it seemed like they were momentarily unable to string words together. "It sucks, but I'm still getting my degree all the same. Sorry you came all this way to see it, grandma and grandpa, but this is a once in a lifetime opportunity."

My father regained some sense and snapped his jaw closed, putting his hands to his face, then running them through his hair.

"So just like that, she expects you to leave?"

"I guess so," I answered, "it sounded like it was urgent and that we need to leave as soon as possible."

"I don't even know where French Guinea is…" Grandma looked to her husband and son to see if they knew where it was, they both shrugged.

"Guiana," I corrected. "It's a country in South America."

"I don't suppose there's any way to talk you out of this?" My dad already sounded defeated, he knew the answer. "You are an adult afterall..."

I shook my head, still beaming with happiness. They would understand with time just how big of an opportunity this was. They would all be proud in the future while they watched me on TV dropping the biggest news of the century, new scientific discoveries that would rock the biology academic world to its core.

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