I teleported to the master switches and turned the lights back on. Bulbs flickered before buzzing to life. I popped to Iseult’s side and tapped his opposite shoulder. He didn’t fall for it, glaring straight at me. Darn, he was no fun.

“Of course I can stop you. You’re a single person. Wait, are you single?”

He rolled his eyes.

“We fought evenly. I had you in a corner at the end.”

“I played with you the whole time. I specialize in fighting one-on-one, remember? They wouldn’t have made me TF Hero Force’s leader if I couldn’t beat a random street thug.”

Iseult grumbled, so I conceded.

“Fine, a hot random street thug.”

“I am a fucking villain.”

“Ok mister villain, what would happen if I focused on your head and teleported it up? I can’t sever it from your body, but your neck would snap. Gg ez no re.”

“That last sentence was unintelligible.”

Although he said that, I could tell he understood the general idea. He rubbed his chin in thought, so I elaborated further.

“Speed or strength gifts don’t protect you from being dropped from the stratosphere. You can’t assassinate or poison me because I’ll see right through it with Spectral Vision. My only weakness is a volume constraint. I can’t deal with big groups.”

“But you would not harm me.”

I pushed his chest so he was backed against the wall, and I boxed him in with my left arm while gripping his chin with my right. This time I held him soft enough he could speak. Learning goals~.

“Yep, I wouldn’t hurt you. I don’t want to hurt anyone. Everyone deserves to live. Everyone gets a second chance.”

“But not you o’ hero, Sofrinov Peace?”

I grinned at him. He had me there.

“That’s not my name anymore. I’m Chaos Theory. Say my name.”

“Wha—?”

“Do it. Say my name.”

“Make me.”

He turned red and couldn’t meet my eyes. All at once, I became aware of his pink lips, how soft they must be. His eyelashes fluttered, inviting me. Maybe…? I brought his head closer. He didn’t resist and turned bright red as he closed his eyes. Oh baby, it’s a triple.

Our lips met and my heart beat from my chest. He tasted saccharine, that hint of gunpowder bringing my mind to the edge. I’d need to watch out next time I shot a gun. That smell might turn me on now.

Faint crashing reached my ears above my own heart’s pounding. Not now, please. Things were getting good. But the universe refused to listen.

With reluctance, I pulled away from him and we gasped for air. The shine on his lips almost stole my mind away again, but I held it back. Bad. No horny. Bonk.

The slamming continued so I addressed the issue. Two scientists had escaped their bonds and rammed into their closet doors, so I popped over and rewrapped them in duct tape. Hehe, have fun as cocoons. That was their punishment for interrupting a good time.

Trapping them in closets was for their own good anyway. Happy children full of Easter cheer traversed the secret corridor—and by happy children, I meant heavily armed guards and a big squid cat. Or maybe it was a cat squid? It looked more cat than squid, but who knew? A scientist would. It looked like that sabertooth tiger with tentacles from the other lab but quadruple the size. I now dub thee Squat.

I teleported back to Iseult. He seemed distraught and had his head against the wall. When I appeared beside him, he stiffened.

“Troubled, fair maiden?”

It took several seconds for Iseult to answer, but he squeezed out the words.

“That should not have fucking happened. I was swept up in the moment. I am not gay.”

His face scrunched. I came closer and grinned at him.

“So you wouldn’t do it again?”

I snuck close enough to touch him, our faces inches apart. The way his ear poked from his hair was so cute. It turned red as the distance closed between us. His eyes grew wide, but his face gravitated closer to mine, an attraction he couldn’t overcome. When our lips nearly touched, I slipped a finger between us.

“I’d love to make out, but we’ve got company. Fight or flight?”

He flinched as my soft whispers grazed him. Iseult turned away, eyes closed.

“Right, my mission. I must not get distracted.”

I teleported the white alley cat to me. It’d be bad if it wandered the lab when Genewall security arrived. The Squat probably practiced cannibalism.

As soon as it appeared in my arms, the cat hissed and clawed at me. Good kitty. I stole a sardine can from the nearest 99¢ store and opened it. Yes, be lured by tasty treats, tiny creature. I shifted both cat and sardines to my house. Hope Surah didn’t mind another stray.

“Your partner’s not here. Are you sure she didn’t join Genewall?”

“No, she would not.”

Iseult scratched his chin and mumbled to himself. He refocused on me.

“There is little chance that would happen. She loves money but not enough to join Genewall. I think.”

“You don’t sound confident.”

“…I need to find her. We must stay and search. Something will be here, some shit we missed.”

I shrugged. Fine by me—fight it was.