Upon review of the current living situation, Lady Bird found that there were no extra rooms other than the single cell they had for the rare prisoner. Something told her that the social worker would not like that. So, she did the only thing she could think of: she called an all hands-on meeting.

The meeting room was a room with chairs and a tarp that served as the screen with a mobile projector that hooked up to a computer or anything with a USB port. It was also a great place to have movie night. Hopefully, there would be enough chairs for once. It was rare that all ninety- nine minions were in the same place at the same time.

The minions shuffled in. They had never really liked meetings, which was a sentiment she agreed with, so she tried not to hold too many. Most of her plans were sent out via email for that reason. She connected her pad to the projector. It took it a few seconds to warm up before it projected the image onto the tarp. One of the minions in the back turned the lights down. No doubt a couple would sleep through the whole thing.

Lady Bird paced behind the projector, making sure not to go too far so she didn’t unplug the cord. "All right, I'm sure you all know what's going on thanks to Blabber."

Blabber was a particularly chatty minion. Secrets never stayed secrets with him around. Unfortunately, he was also the closest thing they had to HR because of his conflict resolution skills. She supposed every office had to have the gossiper.

"Yeah we heard. Congratulations! You and Mr. Boss will make great parents!"

The rest of the minions muttered in agreement. Lady Bird sighed. Sometimes, she wished they were a little less aware of her personal life, though they did give them nice anniversary parties. She cleared her throat and restarted on the task at hand. She wrote Room Plans at the top of the screen.

"Aside from the fact that it wasn't on purpose, unless you want me to get Al Caponed and jailed for forging government documents, we're going to have to play along for six months. One of the requirements is that she needs a room with a bed that's not a cell." A disappointed minion put his hand down. “So if anyone has any suggestions, they are welcomed to make them. Oh and the deadline is tomorrow, so something quick would be nice.

Another one raised his hand. She called on him. "Yes, Gray?" He was one of her older minions, but reliable. He'd at least get the ball rolling with ideas. Her minions weren’t incompetent, but they had trouble with coming up with ideas themselves. They usually needed a nudge from her or Number One.

"We have plenty of empty shipping containers that aren't being used." He suggested with confidence. "That would at least give her privacy and could be moved if we needed to relocate it for some reason.”

"I've seen them use those for homeless people on TV!" That would be Impediment, who was only kept around because he built and maintained the tech. With everything else, he was useless. "Then they stack them together to make some sort of hobo hotel and..."

"Moving along..." If she let him continue, they'd be here all night. He watched way too much TV due to the amount of downtime he usually had. "Gray has a least solved the actual room part, except for one aspect. What about a restroom? " She drew a rectangle on the pad and it showed up on the screen. "We don't have time to do a full plumbing job. And obviously the community showeroom would not sit well with the social worker or me, in fact.”

Even if they cleared it out at a certain time for the kid, there were just too many ways it could go wrong. That and it smelled. No one had figured out what the smell was and despite a few inspections, they couldn’t find the source of it. It wasn’t mold at least.

"She could always use the lady minions’ room. We currently have none." A minion pointed out. He was more toward the back, so she couldn’t see him to determine his identity. "It won't be too far from the shipping container and it has a lock on it.”

Lady Bird looked around the room to see if anyone else might have a suggestion. Some of the minions were nodding, but no one else seemed to have an idea. It couldn’t be helped she supposed. In the upper right hand corner, she wrote Lady Minion’s Bathroom. It would have everything the kid needed.

"That'll have to do. I figure we could just buy some lights and string them up. We have an extension cord so it'll reach the outlet. Now, what else do we need? I figure the bed can go here." She drew another rectangle in the corner. “But it’s going to need more furniture than that. But what?”

This time, several hands came up. Lady Bird smiled to herself. Now that the ball was rolling, the minions would be very helpful. She knew a few of them had kids themselves (though the ones that did were divorced), so they would know what would go into a room. And since the kid was older, they could leave the actual decorating up to her.

By the time the brainstorming session was finished, they determined the room needed a desk, a rack for clothes, a dresser, a night stand, and a surge protector so she could plug in things like her computer and phone. Then they decided where each of the things would go, not that room was much of an issue. But it was nice to put all the squares in a place so they could get some idea of where to put the things. It would help move things along quickly.

"I think we're off to a good start." Lady Bird commented as she sent a mass email of the plans to the minions. Even if they didn’t have communicators, they all had pads or laptops. "So some need to go furniture hunting, some need to help set up the container, and the rest need to start fixing the walls because no self-respecting villain has two gaping holes in their base. You can decide who does what. Oh, and don't forget bed sheets. And is Number One back with Wayne yet?"

"The outside patrol just spotted them coming up." One of them reported as everyone started to get up. “They’re driving Mr. Boss’ car, so someone will need to go pick up the car Number One took.”

"Good." She turned off the projector and disconnected her pad. "Everyone's dismissed. Remember, this all has to be done by tomorrow morning."

The minions left the room and she took off her mask. She never wore the mask around Wayne when it was just the two of them, or the two of them plus Number One.

Number One had known her long before she had gone off on her own. He worked with her under Count Reeser and they'd been working together ever since. But he knew when to make himself scarce, like now. He acknowledged her with a nod of his head.

"Number One, please…"

He replied before she could finish her sentence. It was a habit of his. "Go supervise the others. Yes, Boss."

He walked away. She embraced Wayne and gave him a kiss. His suit was a bit disheveled, meaning that Number One had gotten him here in a hurry. Wayne wrapped his arms around her waist and returned the kiss.

"Not that I'm unhappy to see you, honey, but it's nearly tax day. Not a good time for me to be erm… kidnapped from the office. What's this all about? Did someone threaten to kidnap me again?"

She ran a hand through his curly hair. With her shoes on, she was a couple of inches taller than him, giving her perfect access to it. She just adored playing with his hair. Fortunately, he liked it too and didn't just tolerate it.

"Remember a few months ago when I said was going to try a different tactic with Beretta?"

He nodded. "You had me sign those fake adoption applications. What about it? Surely she's gotten over that…Though she did nearly put a boiler through our bedroom wall.”

Lady Bird took a step back and held Wayne's hands. He tilted his head a little. She swallowed her saliva as she thought about the best way to break the news to him.

"What's wrong? You can tell me anything, Birdie." His hands tightened over hers. "Whatever's wrong, we can fix it together."

She smiled and ran a hand down his cheek. How could she be so lucky to have a man like him in her life?

"Wayne, the papers somehow got sent and went through despite being forgeries. The social worker is bringing the kid tomorrow. It sounds like she’s going to stay with us for at least six months on some kind of trial period to see if we’re compatible as a family unit.” Lady Bird sighed as she turned away from him and started leading him to where the minions were working on the container. “We’re making her a room out of a shipping container and she’s going to use the lady minions’ bathroom since no one is using it right now."

To Wayne’s credit, he hid the fact that he was slightly freaking out pretty well. But she could tell that the way his eyes darted around the room for a few seconds that she had just dropped a bomb on him. He reminded her of an overexcited puppy.

“You mean we’re going to be parents?” He questioned, a grin growing on his face. “At least for a little bit? That’s...that’s great!”

“Don’t get your hopes up." She knew he had wanted children for a while now, though he probably wasn't expecting his first parental experience to be with a teenager. "The kid’s not going to be happy about it and neither is Beretta. Sure, she’ll go along with it because it’s the law and she doesn’t want to get arrested, but I have a feeling that the property damage every time she comes over is going to skyrocket."

“Maybe, but I doubt she would want to accidentally hurt Terri. And maybe with Terri here, she’d actually come less. If she wanted revenge, she’d have to upgrade you from arch-nemesis to mortal enemy, and that would mean she has to publicize her identity and she wouldn’t like that.”

While Beretta's identity wasn't a secret, it wasn't recorded in official records either. She had never been one who liked public attention. Chances were she wouldn't risk it just to upgrade their rival status.

She was happy that he seemed to see the positive side of it. He balanced out all the negative thoughts she often wrestled with. Lady Bird planted a kiss on his cheek.

“Thanks for not being too upset. It’s not everyday someone learns that their spouse accidentally adopted their arch-nemesis' ward, even if it’s probably temporary. I figured you needed to know right away, especially since your name was on the papers too.”

While she didn't want to go to jail, she'd rather it be her than Wayne. She'd be able to defend herself. He wouldn't stand much of a chance.

“I’m glad you did, though just call next time. Number One nearly gave our secretary a heart attack when he kicked open the door."

Good. The secretary was a bit too flirty with him for her comfort. She didn't think she was trying to steal him, but she thought the flirting with him was the best way to get in his good graces. To Wayne's credit, he knew how to handle her.

“Something happened to the phone.We’ll send her flowers or something. Now, let’s go see what the minions are up to and make sure they aren’t burning anything down with those welding torches.”

Wayne nodded and came to walk beside her. They walked along to the part where the shipping container was. Everything seemed to be going smoothly with the cutting for the extension cord. Maybe if they needed extra money, they could start converting containers and selling them.

“You are making sure that she can lock the container, right?” He questioned as they observed the minions working. “As far as I know, most social workers frown on locking kids in a shipping container.”

“Yes, we’re fitting it so that it locks from the inside. We had that discussion back in the meeting.” Lady Bird assured him as she pointed to a minion that was removing the padlock from the outside. “But now that you’re home early, would you like to go out for dinner? I know a nice place that accepts masked villains without question…”

“Are you sure we should leave them alone?” Wayne had his eye on a minion (Impediment of course), who was attempting to put his sleeve out. Who had let him have a torch? “I mean yes, they aren’t incompetent and Number One is doing the supervision, but…”

“I find they tend to work better when no one’s hovering over them. Come on, let’s leave them to it.”

--

The Birds returned to the base to find that it was still standing, though the holes in the wall were still under repair. Number One greeted them as they came in.

“The ones you sent out to get the furniture have returned, Boss and Mr. Lady Bird. We’ve finished the adjustments to the container and it is now able to be lived in.” He told them as they walked along. “We’ve even hooked up a portable AC unit so she won’t get too hot. We’re arranging the furniture now, though they’ll probably be done with it when we get there. There aren’t that many pieces. They were lucky enough to find a matching suite at a garage sale.”

Lady Bird gave a knowing smile to Wayne. He nodded, acknowledging that she had been right earlier about the minions working better when no one was hovering over them. But it was impressive that they found the furniture so quickly. Hopefully it was tasteful.

“Let’s see it, Number One. It’ll at least be a good start.”

He led them to the container, which had been painted a beige color. She supposed it was better than nothing. At least it looked a little less like a shipping container with the paint. Number One opened the container.

The bed was in the back corner with a night stand next to it. The dresser was across the container from the bed, and the desk was a bit further down on the right side. There was a string of lights that went around the perimeter and all the cords were taped out of the way. The switch for the lights sat beside the bed. The portable AC unit sat near the end of the bed.

“It’s a bit bare,” Wayne admitted. “But it’s got charm. I don't think Terri will object too much."

“She’ll be able to decorate it how she likes.” Lady Bird noticed something was missing. “Where’s the rack for the clothes?”

“Some are still attempting to put it together.” Number One explained as he leaned on the bed. “The instructions are a bit vague. And we figured that she might want to choose the chair for her desk, or have the one she’s using at Beretta's sent over. Since she plays games a lot, she'll want a comfortable chair."

“Very good, Number One. Relay that to the boys too. And tell them to be on their best behavior with the social worker. We want to make a good impression."

The minions had really done a good job despite it being rushed. If she and Wayne didn't have their own room, she'd be comfortable here. It was better than some places she had been in her lifetime.

“Yes, Boss.”

Lady Bird and Wayne stood in the shipping container turned bedroom. She could hardly believe this was happening. Now to see how Terri would react to all of this and if it would meet the social worker’s standard. She could stand going to jail for criminal activity, but she was not going there because her bluff accidentally backfired. It would completely ruin her reputation as a villain.