I wanted to fly back to my cave, but a message from the baron stopped me. He would be sending his son to visit my lands. I don’t know why a royal’s son would want to visit my cave, but it forced me to take a carriage back home instead of my wings.

I sat in the carriage looking at the face of the red plumed knight. “So you’re the baron’s son?”

“Correct.” He spoke with his same monotone draw. It was odd that the baron’s son was a knight, but considering that most presidents served in the army I suppose that military service is a way to endear one to the public. “Next in line?”

“Correct.” I needed to treat him really well. When the grandfather dies then this guy will be who I have to deal with. I need to make a good impression now. I cringe at our last encounter. The fight with the orc where I chopped two of his knights in two. It was a hostage situation. Surely he doesn’t blame me. I look at his face, trying to detect any animosity, but his stoney mask betrays nothing. “Got a name?”

“Edmund Herbet”

“Nice name. I’m Anon.”

At the cave I begin creating bricks. The knight watches me. “Just give me a second we will set you up with a house.” He is a royal alfter all I can’t have him sleeping just anywhere. The kobolds are content with their old living quarters. They have spread out animal pelts to turn the whole floor into a bed. The goblins sleep in communal houses in the forest. The demi-humans, just sleep in the open parts of the cave. I need to construct small lodgings for the demi-humans as well. If my town keeps expanding then I should create a barracks/inn.

“That will not be necessary.”

“It won’t? There aren’t any beds in the cave. I don’t know how much you royals enjoy sleeping on the floor.” I give an awkward smile.

“My training as a knight has sufficiently accustomed me to sleeping bags.”

Cool, problem solved, I guess.

“Here let me give you the tour.” I guide him through the many traps at the entrance, showing him the path to take incase he ever wants to leave or enter the cave. We stole a page from Alkeda’s book. We place inconspicuous stones to mark paths with danger. The locals know what the stones mean, but outsiders have no clue.

“This is forge. It is the center of the cave. Here is Bob.” I point to Bob. Wait, is that Bob? I inspect him.

Name:Bob level:1/20 Race: Kobold, Kobold Smith, Kobold Tinkerer Skills : Craftsmanship(Major) Experimenter(Medium)

It is Bob, he just evolved twice and I haven't seen him since the battle with the goblins. Bob bobs his head around the side of the smithery. He smiles at me and runs over. “Lord Anon. Bob makes a new invention. Take chantless fire magic and put it in pot.”

“You did what?” Instead of telling me he opts to show me. He runs to the forge, grabs a small clay put with a piece of rope sticking out. He lights the fuse at the forge then chucks it into a deserted part of the cave. That part of the cave is full of clay fragments already. He has been testing this alot. The fuse burns until it reaches the clay then it explodes. Clay is sent flying.

He has made grenades. The words of the orc ring in my ears. Once humans get gunpowder then they will have the means to exterminate all monsters.

“That’s very good Bob, but our guest here.” I point to the baron’s son. “Doesn’t like loud noises. So please don’t test anything with the…” What did he call it? “Chantless fire magic while he is here.” Bob nods. You can tell he is nodding and not just bobbing his head because…. Actually you can’t tell at all. I just hope he gets what I’m trying to tell him.

“This is our mine. We mind stuff here.”

Edmund points to the mole woman. She is claw deep in soil, racking out large amounts of rocks. “That’s not a kobold.”

“Very astute. That was one of the slave women that I received from killing the orc.” He nods. Then takes out a pencil and paper. He writes something down. Why is he writing stuff down? Is this some kind of inspection? Yap comes running up to me. He’s larger and his scales are a bright red, but I can tell it’s Yap because as he saw me he excitedly began to yap. Might as well inspect him too.

Name: Yap level 2 Race: Kobold, Kobold Warrior, Ruby Kobold Skills: Figging(major) Mineral inspection(medium)

He chose one of the evolutions that I passed on. Ruby Kobold. Fire aspect kobolds are able to withstand even lava. Usually serves magma dragons. I aint no magma dragon, but it’s good to have someone who can withstand the heat of the lower parts of the mountain.

“Dragon lord, look!” He holds in his palm a small flake of yellow shiny rock.

“Very shiny rock. Yap find deep in cave.”

I pat him on his jagged head. “Very good, this is gold. The same stuff that your pay is made of. Mine this too. It is very useful.”

I turn to Edmund. He is writing down notes again.

“This is our prisoner.” I’m really running out of things inside the cave to show him at this point. I only stopped by here because I wanted to check on my club mate. Kan, the bathuman, is laying down in the fetal position with his back turned to us. He has wrapped himself in his wings. Edmund produces a blue sphere from his back and touches it to the back of Kan’s wings. Kan doesn’t react. Edmund reads his data then jots it down.

“You keep a Chosen as a prisoner?”

I shrug. The fact that he’s a Chosen doesn’t matter to me. He attacked me. I can keep him as a prisoner until he is reducated. Just like China. Fuck off, Eris. ‘Until he is disciplined’ is that the American free country term that fits with my character? Huh? Is it!

“Go away.” Kan speaks in a voice that sounds like it’s on the verge of tears.

“He sounds depressed.”

“He is.” Edmund says in his matter of fact speech tone.

“How do you know?” He doesn’t strike me as a therapist.

“Inspections. Abnormal status: Depression(major)” Edmund lists. Jeez, is nothing sacred from the system? I’m really wishing that I followed through with my plans to train a kobold in the art of psychology.

“Well, that’s the tour. You see that tent over there.” I point to a few animal rugs that I strung up in the back of the cave. Edmund nods. “That is where I sleep. We normally have communal dinner then go to sleep. You can sleep anywhere you like.”

After dinner I return to my prisoner to address the problem of his depression. I’m not the best person for this. My attitude is too cut and dry. Edmund has chosen to lay out his sleeping bag only a few meters from Kan’s cage. I try to speak in hushed tones so that I don’t wake Edmund up. “Hey, why are you depressed?”

Kan rolls over. His head poking out from his wing wrapping. “Just kill me.”

“Nah bra. Can’t do that. Killing prisoners is icky. Goes against the Geneva convention.” I’m not sure how the Geneva convention applies to domestic prisoners, but judging it by the one youtube video I saw it is a good way to treat prisoners. His head must be clouded by self hate. He doesn’t notice the very obvious name drop that I just dropped. Instead he goes silent.

“Wanna talk about it?” I’m not a licensed counselor. I’m more like the guy who’s being considerate when a crying drunk starts to cry. Kan shakes his head.

“Come on bro, you’ll feel better after you talk about it.”

He sighs again. Covering his head from my sight. I’m about to get up and walk away. Write this night off as a loss, but he begins to talk.

“I nailed everything with two wings.” I would say ‘Nice dude’, but his somber tone makes this seem like a bad thing. “How am I going to afford the child support for all of the children.” I pause. Containing my laughter with a lip bite. There is no child support in this world. Even if there was, he’s actually in another country. The republic doesn’t have any dominion here. They can’t collect child support on my land.

Wait.

Doesn’t that make me an asylum state. That would be problematic. Don’t want criminals flocking to my mountain just to escape the law.

“It was that damn arrow. It wasn’t me!” He shouts.

“Dude chill, yeah the arrow. I noticed that it makes one more lustful.”

“It makes anyone who touches it fall in love with what they see. The sky dwellers, they gave it to me as my weapon to lead them.”

“Did you have a bird fetish before?”

“No! I’m not a feathery. It was all that damn arrow.” I bite my tongue. I don’t want to tell him that the arrow probably just amplifies preexisting attraction. I have only tested it on myself. The effects were minimal. Maybe he is just someone with little self control.

“Yeah dude. It was totally just the arrow, but now you don’t have the arrow.” dude bro, fukan sicko mode Eris pokes fun at me for saying dude and bro a lot. I’m just being friendly with him. “I still remember who I was when I held it. I remember what I’ve done.” He furls his wings and grabs the bars of his cage. “You must let me out. I need to atone for what I’ve done!”

“How?”

“What?”

“How are you going to atone? Are you going to be a father figure in thousands of bird baby lifes?”

“I can fight. I can get stronger. If I defeat the tree dwellers then the skies will be safe for my future children.”

“That sounds like air dweller rhetoric.”

“What else am I supposed to do? I can’t just sit here while my lovers are slain at the hands of filthy tree dwellers!”

“Peace, just make peace.” Why does no one take the diplomatic option first? You’ll only get half of what you want, such is the nature of compromise that peace forces you into, but atleast you aren’t going to fucking war.

“Peace was never an option!” He shakes his bars, rocking his cell back and forth.

“Stop that.” I warn him, but he keeps shaking his cage until he tips it over. Like a student leaning back in a chair he tips over and hits the ground hard. I check that the cage is still secure and shrug. He’s damn adamant about that. I quickly check him for any signs of magical brainwashing, but there are none. It would seem that they brainwashed him the old fashion way. With words, very troubling. Once someone has internalized a belief it is hard for them to let go of it. I shrug. “I’ll be back tomorrow. Try to think about peace.”

I hear the furious scribbling of a pencil on paper. I turn to see Edmun taking notes again. I pay it no head. Let him inspect my cave, it’s not like anything bad will come of him seeing how great of a hero I am.

“Night Edmund.”

He nods his head at me then finishes what he was writing.