《The Devil is a Stoner》Chapter 12: Edibles
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Cole's life was starting to finally take a turn for the better. The Drug Store was a massive success, the best farmer in town is personally growing weed for him, and he has obtained two stoner friends.
It was currently evening, and the Drug Store was closed for the day. They had sold just as much weed as the first day, and even hired a new employee, Fellia. Her first job had been cleaning the house, which she had done phenomenally. The entire store was now almost completely spotless.
It was time for another night of celebrating, just like almost every night beforehand. Cole and Rogg were already hitting the apple pipe while Fellia watched from the side. She still had a lot of characteristics left from her life as a maid and acted much like a servant. It wasn't surprising, as she had been a maid from the age of seven.
Of course, Cole thought having a personal maid would be cool, but he would prefer if Fellia acted more casually. Only time would tell when she would start getting comfortable enough.
"Come on Fellia, you're gonna have to hit the pipe too!"
"Ehh... I guess if you say so..."
Fellia inhaled the smoke, and now all three of them were baked. Even still, Fellia didn't get herself too comfortable, but she did engage in the dumb conversations a lot more. She seemed to be enjoying the night, which is all that mattered.
Cole's life was getting very close to perfection, but there was still something very important missing. Up until now, the only smoking method used has been a crappy apple pipe. For a perfect life, the first step was obviously to achieve a better way of inhaling cannabis.
I need a bong!
"Rogg, do you know any glass people around."
"Glass people? Hahaha, do you mean glassmiths?"
Cole and Rogg were both baked to the level that the entire conversation seemed to be in slow motion. They were talking really slowly, and there was a noticeable delay between each response. If an outsider joined in, they would have no idea what was going on.
"Yes, glassmiths whatever. Do any of those live around here?"
"What the fuck Cole, did you really just call them glass people? But yes, there is one next to the uhh... Was it next to the blacksmith? I don't fucking remember. What do you even need glass for?"
This was truly a conversation only high people could achieve. Fellia, who was also baked was laughing quietly in the background.
"It's something very important. We'll finally get rid of these fucking apple pipes."
"What? Are there more ways of smoking other than apples?"
Rogg was just as excited as Cole to finally get rid of the apple pipes. It seemed like everyone found it slightly off-putting to smoke through apples.
"You bet there are. There are so many, I can't even remember all of them. My favourite will need glass though."
"Really? Why have we been smoking through fucking apples then? Let's go to the glassmith right now!"
"Rogg, it's 10 pm. It must be closed already. I'll go tomorrow morning."
"Oh shit, you're right. I thought it was like 4 pm or something."
Cole was finally going to be one step closer to his ideal life. Tomorrow, he could finally say goodbye to apple pipes.
The rest of the night continued as normal. Well, if smoking unbelievable amounts of cannabis could be considered normal.
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It was now 10 am on the following morning. The crew had passed out just before midnight, this time actually making it to bed.
Cole had gotten up early and was currently looking for the glassmith in the commercial district, leaving the Drug Store in Rogg's supervision.
Rogg said it's near a blacksmith right? Where was the blacksmith again...
Cole was quite lost but eventually found the glassmith. It was indeed next to the town's blacksmith. Cole headed inside the store. It was neat, with shelves full of different kinds of glasses and glass decorations. He was greeted by an old man with a moustache. It seemed like Cole was becoming a celebrity in town, as the old man recognized him straight away.
"Welcome to the Glass store! Oh, you're the guy from the Drug Store! How may I help you?"
"Hey, I'm actually looking for a bong. Do you guys sell those around here?"
Cole wasn't expecting the glassmith to know what a bong is but tried asking anyway.
"Hmm... No, I haven't heard of this 'bong' before. What is it used for?"
As expected. Well, this is where my drawing comes in handy.
Cole had spent the morning drawing a bong using ink. He knew no one would know what a bong is and didn't know how to describe each part using words. He decided the easiest way to get the message across would be to draw a blueprint. Cole wasn't necessarily the most artistic person, but he easily drew all of the parts needed for a bong.
He had drawn a 40-centimetre long straight tube bong. It was a fairly simple design with a large bowl. He used a similar bong back on earth, and it had worked wonders for many years. Now he just had to hope the glassmith would be good enough to recreate it. He handed over the blueprint.
"Here, it's called a water pipe or bong. It's used for smoking weed. Do you think you could make one?"
The old man analyzed Cole's blueprint and seemed to understand it.
"Hmm, an interesting design. The weed goes here and you inhale through the top, am I right? What's the need for this long tube though?"
Looks like the old man was also a fan of cannabis, as he pointed at the downstem and guessed its purpose. He easily learned how the bong works just by looking at the blueprint for a few seconds.
"You're correct. The tube is where the water goes. The smoke travels through it, making for a more pleasant hit."
"Oh, I see. Indeed, this does seem better than the apple pipe. I think I can get it done by evening. As for the price... I think 15 silver should suffice. It is a custom made piece after all."
15 silver? That's 15 grams for a bong... Well, I guess It's worth it considering how much weed we'll get from 100 plants.
Cole didn't consider the price much, as he just wanted a bong. An apple pipe was a good substitute, but they do get stale after a while. Even just getting a bong in this medieval age was good enough as it is.
"Sounds good to me. I'll come back to receive it in the evening then."
Cole left the Glass store in a good mood. The apple pipe had already become a classic throughout the town of Medoea. Everyone knew how to make one, and it was really cheap. However, the apple pipe falls short in almost every other aspect when compared to a lot of other methods. Cole was going to be the proud owner of the first bong in town.
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The next step would be joints, but Cole had no idea how rolling papers were made. Blunts, on the other hand, might be slightly easier to achieve. There is no need to hurry though, as Cole preferred a bong anyway.
He headed back towards the Drug Store with good news. On the third day, traffic had finally died down and there was never a line longer than two or three people. This didn't mean they were losing customers, however. Most people in town had already bought enough for a couple of days and would come back for more after running out again.
Cole opened the door and headed inside. He was greeted by Rogg, who looked troubled.
"Cole! We have a problem! Everyone just keeps buying more and more weed, and we're going to run out soon! The second plant is almost a third of the way gone already. What are we going to do?"
Keeps buying more and more? Don't tell me their tolerances already growing? The Drug Store hasn't even been open for a week yet.
"There isn't much we can do, to be honest. We just have to wait for the plant delivery. Even if we make hash out of the leaves it will only last for a few hours... Wait, there's one thing we could do."
The Drug Store was suffering from its own success. At this rate, the citizens of Medoea would have to take a two-month tolerance break. That's when Cole remembered something, edibles! He had previously dismissed making them since neither he nor Rogg could cook well enough. However, Fellia was a maid. She must have made dinner for the Lennox household at least a few times.
"Fellia can you cook?"
"Yes! I used to cook for the Duke for a couple of years. I am quite confident in my skills. Are you perhaps hungry?"
Fellia was quite excited to have an opportunity to cook for Cole. It seemed like she wanted to show off her skills.
"Perfect! We'll just make edibles out of the leaves!"
Rogg and Fellia once again heard an unfamiliar word coming from Cole's mouth. Isn't weed supposed to be smoked? Rogg was the first one to speak up.
"Edibles? Are you telling me weed can be eaten?"
"Yep, that is correct. I tried making weed cookies once, but they ended up tasting like shit and just made me sleepy. I'm sure Fellia can easily succeed though!"
Fellia no longer looked so confident. She considered herself a decent cook but trying new recipes is always difficult, especially when she didn't even know what "weed cookies" were. She wouldn't want the first impression of her cooking to be a failure.
"Ehh... Are you sure? If even you failed, how can I be of any help?"
"You can make cookies right? Mine failed just because I suck at cooking. For an experienced cook, making edibles will be easy. Let's try it right now!"
"Well... I guess I can try if you say so."
The two headed into the kitchen to start making edibles. In this world, cooking is most commonly done using magic. Stoves turned on just by flowing mana through them. The temperature was defined by the amount of mana used. This meant, that cooks in this world were really adept at controlling their manaflow. Fellia was no exception and could easily keep the stove at a specific temperature.
"So uhh... How do I explain this... The cannabis leaves have to be decarbed before they can be used. Basically what that means is, they have to be baked at a low temperature first."
Cole tried explaining how to decarb cannabis but didn't do a great job at it. He barely even understood the topic himself. Fellia somewhat made sense of the explanation though, and she started to work.
Fellia was a better cook than Cole could have ever imagined. The first step in making weed cookies is to infuse the cannabis with butter, making it cannabutter. Cole only had to give basic instructions on the method, and Fellia understood it immediately. The cannabutter was done in just under two hours. Now all that was left, was to make cookies.
"Alright. I doubt you will need my help making cookies. I'll just leave it to you!"
"Yes! Thank you for the help!"
Fellia was in high spirit again after realizing how easy the recipe was. Watching her work was really satisfying.
I really hope those leaves are potent enough.
Usually, edibles are made of cannabis flower. It was possible to make them using the leaves, but it wouldn't be as potent. Generally, cannabis leaves don't have much THC in them. Most of the time, it's between 0-4%. Cole was optimistic though, as the leaves did look quite good. Besides, it wouldn't be the end of the world even if the plan failed.
Cole watched the baking process from the side. He understood very little, due to his habit of buying microwave food and never cooking his own. Fellia seemed to know exactly what she was doing without making mistakes. Cole always enjoyed watching professionals at work, and this time was no exception.
After one more hour, the cookies were ready. Fellia looked proud as she presented them to Cole and Rogg. The cookies were quite basic without any fancy toppings but looked delicious nonetheless.
"Ooh, these look delicious! Let's dig in!"
Cole forgot his manners and grabbed a cookie straight away. The freshly baked goodness invaded his mouth along with a slight cannabis-like taste. The taste was truly spectacular, and Cole couldn't stop eating. He had tested all kinds of cookies before, but these were by far the best. Fellia's home-cooked cookies even beat his favourite 4€ cookies from the supermarket.
Fellia and Rogg just looked at Cole as he enjoyed the cookie. Weed cookies were still new for Rogg, so he decided to let Cole test them out first.
"Holy shit! These cookies are fucking amazing! Great job Fellia!"
"Ah, Thank you!"
Fellia was slightly reddened. It seemed like she wasn't used to getting praised either. She was happy that the cookies were successful, however. Cole reached out for another cookie. They were so good, he completely forgot that they had THC in them and just ate for the taste.
The cookies disappeared one after another. Rogg was just like Cole and rarely ate any professionally cooked food. He was also fascinated by the cookies.
After 5 minutes, the whole batch of 15 cookies was eaten. Cole ate seven of them, Rogg five, and Fellia took the rest. Cole seemed to finally realize what had happened.
"Hold on a second... Did I just eat seven weed cookies?"
Well, they were made using leaves. Seven should be completely fine.
No one was prepared for the trip that was about to come.
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