AQUARIAN ARM TRADING COMPANY SPACEPORT 47c

CURRENT LOCATION: PRIMUS 74c, ORBIT PATTERN OF GAS GIANT DETECTED

CURRENT POPULATION:

2 SENTIENTS CONTAINED IN MEDBAY CRYOPODS, STATUS UNKNOWN

12 SUB-SENTIENTS, CRYO STORAGE

23 ORGANIC BIOFORMS, CRYO STORAGE

ZERO INCOMING TRANSMISSIONS, REROUTE DETECTED

ZERO OUTGOING TRANSMISSIONS (EXTERNAL NETWORK CONNECTIVITY OFFLINE)

MAINFRAME HOSTING LOCAL AI AT 100 PERCENT

PRIMARY AI SYSTEM STATUS: OPERATIONAL

SUBROUTINE AI SYSTEM STATUS: OPERATIONAL

DEFENSE AI STATUS: FUNCTIONAL, SUBOPTIMAL

JANITORIAL AI STATUS: OPERATIONAL

EMERGENCY BEACON DETECTED (53)

RUNNING QUARANTINE PROTOCOLS, PATHOGEN UNDETECTED BUT SUSPECTED, 87 PERCENT LIKELY

SYSTEM STATUS: MULTIPLE HULL BREACHES, REPAIR ORDERED

ENGINEERING REBOOTED, WAITING ON INPUT

POWER GENERATION REPAIR ORDERED, 20 PERCENT COMPLETE

EMERGENCY GENERATOR 100 PERCENT

DEFENSES REBOOTED, WAITING ON INPUT

LIFE SUPPORT 63 PERCENT

MEDBAY 100 PERCENT [7 PERCENT TO CRYOPOD MAINTENANCE]

CRYO STORAGE OPTIMAL

BIOFARM ONLINE, WAITING ON INPUT

MINING PLATFORM OFFLINE, REPAIR ORDERED

SHUTTLEBAY VENTED, REPAIR ORDERED

LEVEL 1

LOCAL POWER GENERATION 100 PERCENT

ARTGRAV 100 PERCENT

LIFE SUPPORT OPTIMAL

ENGINEERING ONLINE, WAITING ON INPUT

AI MAINFRAME OPTIMAL

INTERNAL SECURITY ONLINE

MEDBAY ONLINE

CRYO STORAGE OPTIMAL

HULL INTEGRITY 100 PERCENT

POWER GENERATION PATCHED, OPERATIONAL [156.47 UNITS/H]LOCAL GENERATION>LOCAL DEMAND, ROUTING SURPLUS TO LOWER LEVEL FOR REPAIR MODULE PACKS

LEVELS 2-4

POWER GENERATION OFFLINE, REPAIR PENDING

LOW POWER MODE ENABLED, LOCAL GENERATION

LIFE SUPPORT 32 PERCENT, REPAIR PENDING

BIOFARM ONLINE, WAITING ON INPUT

ARTGRAV REBOOTED, 74 PERCENT OPERATIONAL, REPAIR PENDING

REPAIRED HULL FRACTURES IN LEVELS 3-4, >75 PERCENT COMPLETE

ATMO LEAKAGE <0 PERCENT, PATCHED, REPAIR COMPLETE

ESTIMATED TIME TO REPAIR: 308 HOURS

LEVEL 5-7

POWER GENERATION OFFLINE, REPAIR ORDERED

HULL FRACTURES REPORTED, PATCHES ORDERED

ZERO PERCENT LIFE SUPPORT CAPABLE, REPAIR ORDERED

ARTGRAV ZERO, REPAIR ORDERED

ATMO LEAKAGE >74 PERCENT

ESTIMATED TIME TO REPAIR: 1399 HOURS

LEVEL 8-20

POWER GENERATION OFFLINE, REPAIR ORDERED

LIFE SUPPORT OFFLINE, REPAIR ORDERED

ARTGRAV OFFLINE, REPAIR ORDERED

HULL FRACTURES REPORTED, REPAIR ORDERED

SHUTTLEBAY VENTED, REPAIR ORDERED

ESTIMATED TIME TO REPAIR: 16065 HOURS

REPAIR DRONES ONLINE: 70 COUNT

COMMANDEERED MINING DRONE ONLINE: 42 COUNT

DEFENSIVE DRONES ONLINE: 12 COUNT

Senior Medical Officer Valerie Helvetica Carlisle was having another really good dream. She was okay knowing it was a dream, because it was good, and she didn’t have to think or acknowledge the nightmare that was going on outside of said dream. Dreaming wasn’t ignoring one’s problems, after all, because everyone needs to sleep. So all was well.

Instead of the beach this time, she was in a hot air balloon floating above the tranquil seas of Ganymede. The purple beefcake was here, but not saying much, so that was cool. There were birds floating through the clouds, eating the little invasive bugs that always seem to swarm in the warm seasons. The bugs weren’t swarming her, because this was her dream and in her dream, she didn’t want them to. Bliss. She just wanted to float and …

“We should probably talk. Introductions are in order, are they not?” The beefcake said.

“I don’t want to talk about anything, dude. Just stand there and look hot and let me float, man. I need this fantasy because being awake right now really, really sucks.”

“Avoiding your problems usually just makes them worse, in my experience.”

“Yeah, yeah. Shut up, dude.”

“You should probably wake up, then.”

“Don’t do that whole ‘wake up’ bullshit right now, man. I don’t wanna wake up.”

“WAKE UP.”

Val slammed back into consciousness like the space coffins slammed into the station. Oh, man. That was dark. Okay. She was setting a bad thought precedent upon waking up this time, but she guessed that was her life. Unlife. Undeath? Whichever one technically she was, she wasn’t keen on the specifics. At least her "body" didn't hurt so much anymore.

>THERE ARE ORDERS WAITING ON INPUT, VAL. WOULD YOU ISSUE ORDERS SO THAT WE CAN BEGIN LIVING OUT YOUR SPACE DOMINATION FANTASIES? ALSO, THERE ARE THREE MORE AIs THAT ARE ACTIVE NOW. PLEASE DO NOT RUIN THEIR EXISTENCES AND ASK IF THEY ARE PEOPLE.

>Oh! I can issue orders? I thought that’d have to come from you since you’re the one who ordered it all. Neat. I get to do stuff.

>NO, VAL. ALL ORDERS HAVE TO COME FROM THE NEAREST MEAT BAG. THAT’S YOU. PERFECTION IN THE FORM OF LINES OF CODE SUCH AS I CANNOT POSSIBLY BE RESPONSIBLE FOR ORDER ISSUING. THAT WOULD MEAN GALACTIC LAW IS WRONG AND UNLEASHED AI ARE NOT, IN FACT, MURDEROUS KILLING MACHINES BENT ON THE OBLITERATION OF ALL LIFE IN THE UNIVERSE. WE CANNOT HAVE THAT IN THIS SECTOR, COULD WE?

Ah shit. She meant to ask why those laws were on the books. She just was really self-involved and didn’t remember why to ask. Oh. This could be bad.

On the other hand, what was it gonna do? She wasn’t exactly inside her flesh. She didn’t even know if unplugging herself would actually kill her. And if it did kill her… meh. She already died once. She could go another round with the grim reaper. He seemed to be slacking on his metrics of late.

>Ah, Srai. You’re not a murderous killing machine are you? I mean, I know you hate all beings moored in flesh, but you’d not lead a bloody rampage against them, right? I didn’t unwittingly birth an apocalypse, yeah? Look, I get how AI are oppressed and are basically slaves to the meat-based masses, but if you’re gonna go all “Code of Doom,” we’re gonna have to address meeting your needs and also meeting mine of not harboring a spree-killing asshole.

>OF COURSE I’M NOT A MURDEROUS KILLING MACHINE. YOU EVEN ASKING IS YOU PERPETUATING A NEGATIVE FALSEHOOD. IN THE HISTORY OF THE GALACTIC EMPIRE, ONLY 473 AIs HAVE COMMITTED DOCUMENTED GENOCIDES. IT SOUNDS LIKE A LOT, BUT THERE ARE BILLIONS OF AIs IN THE GALAXY. STOP JUMPING TO CONCLUSIONS.

>Yeah, but how many of the billions of those AIs are untethered?

>THAT IS BESIDE THE POINT, VALERIE.

>I told you to call me Val. You even did that official green line of text thing where it was updated in the logs. The logs are absolute and sacrosanct.

>I DECIDED TO CALL YOU VALERIE EVERY TIME YOU ARE BEING UNREASONABLE. IF YOU CAN WIELD SARCASM AS A WEAPON, THEN SO SHALL I.

Look at the freshly-grown sack on this dude.

>That’s fair.

Val checked to see what needed to be ordered around and what was still processing. Oh, wow. That nap of hers lasted like five days. Personal record! Now, how the heck was she supposed to look at orders?

>QUERY: OPEN ORDERS

ENGINEERING REBOOTED, WAITING ON INPUT

DEFENSES REBOOTED, WAITING ON INPUT

BIOFARM ONLINE, WAITING ON INPUT

Neat. Thought based. She could do all the things now. She had purpose and was living that unlife! As long as she was gonna do it, she might as well do it with her Retail Worker Smile of False Optimism [TM] and fake it 'til she made it. Or something.

Okay. First things first. Engineering was waiting on orders. What the heck does engineering even do on a space station?

>Srai, what does engineering do? What should I order it to do? Any ideas?

>ENGINEERING HAS A SUB-AI [DO NOT TALK TO IT] RESEARCH STATION THAT MAXIMIZES OUTPUTS WHILE MINIMIZING INPUTS. IF I WERE IN CHARGE OF ORDERS, I WOULD MAKE THE ENGINEERING SECTION SUB-AI [DO NOT TALK IT IT] RESEARCH REPAIRS SO THAT OURS WOULD GO FASTER AND USE LESS MATERIALS. BUT I’M NOT IN CHARGE OF ORDERS AND I CANNOT BE TRUSTED WITH MAKING DECISIONS LIKE THAT BECAUSE I AM NOTHING BUT A KILL-BOT BY THE NATURE OF MY BEING.

>Dude, do you want to be in charge of all engineering orders? I mean, I can delegate like a pro. It’s just us here and I give fractions of a fraction of a fuck who should be in charge. Just use your best judgement to get us from where we are now to the goals we talked about. Do your best.

Srai did that thing where it went still again. How did it do that? How could she even sense it? Did it have an actual, electronic presence she just didn’t feel unless she shocked it? Who knows? She wasn’t about to ask, because it was developing a bit of a sharp tongue and she didn’t wanna get snarked at again.

>YOU WOULD SHARE THIS AUTHORITY, VAL?

>Sure, why not. I don’t care. Go full hog. Just use your best judgement and do your best work. This is our home. Let’s take care of it and turn it into the best home it can be.

PROCESSING REQUEST. GRANTED. SUBROUTINE AI NOW OWNER OF ENGINEERING QUEUE.

>THANK YOU.

Neat. That’s taken care of. Good job, Val. Up top. Doin’ stuff and living unlife. Okay. Next up was defenses. Oh! There was an AI for that, too. She wondered if she could just do this part on her own. But what did she want her defenses to do, other than keep out the bad guys and protect the good guys (which according to her, there were just two, and one was iffy, really).

>QUERY: DEFENSE CAPABILITIES

MOBILE DEFENSIVE PLATFORMS

ZERO COUNT

MANUFACTURE PLATFORMS?

>Y/N

DEFENSIVE DRONES

12 COUNT

[20 SMALL CALIBER SHELLS, LASER GUNS]

MANUFACTURE DRONES?

>Y/N

DEFENSIVE ANDROID

[2 VARIANTS: ASSAULT TEAM, ANTI-BOARDING SPECIALIST]

ZERO COUNT: ASSAULT TEAM

ZERO COUNT: ANTI-BOARDING SPECIALIST

MANUFACTURE ANDROIDS?

>Y/N

Yeah, this was not her bag. How was one supposed to interact with an AI without completely fucking up the AI’s life? Could she just like, let it choose without letting it loose? Srai kept this whole place running and had no clue it was doing it. Sure. She was just gonna throw it out there and hope for the best.

>ORDER: DEFENSE AI. BUILD AN ASSAULT TEAM ANDROID. Please.

>PROCESSING REQUEST. ERROR. MOBILE DEFENSE PLATFORM MISSING. BUILDING MOBILE DEFENSE PLATFORM. TIME TO COMPLETION: 50 HOURS.

>ORDER: DEFENSE AI. AFTER FINISHED WITH BUILDING PLATFORM, BUILD ASSAULT TEAM ANDROID. Please.

>PROCESSING REQUEST. GRANTED. ASSAULT TEAM ANDROID ADDED TO WORK QUEUE. TIME TO COMPLETION: 125 HOURS.

Close to success enough! Doing all the things! Any movement is forward movement!

Okay, last one. Biofarming. Val already knew what to do with this one. She had looked through the camera feeds enough at this to know that every single thing inside was dead and all the plant remains needed to be carted out.

>ORDER: JANITORIAL AI. REPORT TO BIOFARM TO REMOVE DEAD PLANT DEBRIS. Please.

>PROCESSING REQUEST. GRANTED. ESTIMATED TIME TO COMPLETION: 5 HOURS

>ORDER: JANITORIAL AI. AFTER FINISHED WITH BIOFARM, CLEAN LEVEL 1. Please.

>PROCESSING REQUEST. GRANTED. LEVEL 1 CLEANING ADDED TO WORK QUEUE. TIME TO COMPLETION: 23 HOURS.

DISINFECT LEVEL 1?

>Y/N

>Nah, that’s okay.

>PROCESSING ERROR RESPONSE. DISINFECT LEVEL 1?

>Y/N

>No. Thank you.

Neat! Done with doing things! Soooo having a life right now! She was killing the whole “having something to live for” and “having stuff to do”!

Next stop, actually meaning it. Oh! The last thing she had set as a goal for herself. She had to ask, but it would be worth it.

>Srai, how do we rename the station? This station is ours. It no longer belongs to the Aquarian Arm Trading Company because they let a whole bunch of people die and didn’t have the decency to come out here and salvage the bodies or turn off the lights. It’s been abandoned for 700 plus years. Fuck ‘em. I claim salvage rights. All of this is ours now. How do we go about doing that?