"What are you doing here?" I ask through clenched teeth.

"Why wouldn't I be here? This is a direct attack on those who should be under my protection," he answers.

"Your job isn't to protect—"

"To protect and serve? But that's what police officers do, isn't it, Chiba?"

"But you aren't a police officer! You're the Demon Lord!"

"Who said I couldn't be both?"

This is terrible. You can eject a corrupt ruler from his throne, sure, but you can't necessarily de-seat the police chief when the law is on his side.

"Anyway..." He leers. "That outfit suits you."

I'm speechless with rage.

He continues talking. "Look at this little reunion tour you've organized. You've done well for yourself, Chiba."

"We've all got names, too," Mamoru growls.

"Chosen Hero!" the Demon Lord exclaims. "Even you! This is a delight. It looks like you've recovered after our scuffle, too."

I frown. "You seem unusually happy to see us, Sinensis."

"What's unusual about it? I didn't bring you here to be miserable."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Izumi asks.

"Who knows?" With a flourish, he pulls out a notebook and a pen. "Now, I do believe you were going to give me your statements."

Meticulously, he pulls our stories out of us. We leave out the part about being here as representatives of the Thieves' Guild, opting for our bodyguard cover story instead, and he writes it down without question. This is so weird.

"Is there anything else you’d like to confess?”

“What do you think?”

Oddly enough, Sinensis is the one to back down. "There's no need for that. I only wish you adventurers the best."

"Then why did you do this?" I ask. "If you like us so much, why did you bring us here in the first place?"

"Because, Chiba, you all needed—"

A soft breeze blows my hair around as a figure in a black suit flits past me like a hummingbird. Sinensis hisses and doubles over, clutching his stomach as if in pain. With a start, I realize that the demons who’d been put to sleep are starting to wake up - and starting to fight back. They break their magic bonds with no effort at all.

The nearby demon throws Sinensis over his shoulder and turns to us with a wide, fanged grin.

"You won't mind if I take this, will you?"

The room falls silent. For some reason, it's hard to breathe. Poison gas? No, nothing so underhanded. Each person – each demon – seems to be surrounded by an aura of some kind. It's translucent, nebulous, and hard to describe. Magic. I'm getting a headache from the psychic pressure.

"My lord!" Lavender yells, sprinting across the room to no avail.

The demon has already zipped over to the shattered window. The Canephoran demons help the Camellia demons give chase. They all disappear into the night.

Running a perp down on foot is one of the coolest things a police officer can do, but I'm going to miss the opportunity because I don't have super speed. And anyway, why would I want to chase them? The politics of this world are none of my business. If they want to kidnap the Demon Lord, that's their business.

Holy crap, did they just kidnap the Demon Lord?

I know he's just a human like the rest of us, but he's no weakling if he's managed to run a country for this long. What could they possibly want with him?

"Lilah!" Windwood calls out, rushing over to join our growing group.

Before she can protest, he wraps her tightly in a hug, and I could swear he's shedding a few tears of relief at her safety.

"I'm fine," she protests quietly.

"Adventurers," he asks. "Would you please bring the carriage around? We won't be staying any longer."

Mamoru and Izumi nod, bow, and go together to make preparations for our departure. I'm left alone with the happy family and my thoughts. In the deafening silence, the night begins to blur. I'm vaguely aware of returning to the manor and trading my awful costume for comfortable pajamas. I even manage to stay awake long enough for Lilah to sneak into my room and tell me that the other members of the Thieves' Guild took the coffee into their custody, just as planned.

No more. I've had enough of demons. I've had enough of drinks. I just want to sleep.

Of course, that would be too easy. I'm not granted a moment's rest. Even as my head hits the soft pillow, I'm brought back to wakefulness by Lavender's voice coming from their mirror.

"Lady Hiyori." The greeting is getting familiar. I still don't like it. "Please, answer me."

"Can't it wait until morning?"

"No. I must beseech you—"

"Be what now?"

"The kingdom is in danger, Lady Hiyori," they explain. "Though we still do not know exactly from whom."

"The demons were working with... the demons, in order to get to the Demon Lord?" Say that five times fast, I dare you.

"What does this have to do with me and the rest of the party?"

"We lost track of the kidnappers. They might be an additional force from Canephora, or they may hail from somewhere entirely different. There is even a chance that they are a faction from our very country. You and your friends are the only ones who can be trusted. So I must beseech you. Please rescue my lord."

"Are you insane?" I manage to keep my voice to an incredulous whisper. "Why in the world would we go through anything at all for someone like him?"

"Because he needs you," Lavender answers. "As you all needed him."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Ask the other girls," they reply.

Come to think of it, Windwood mentioned Lilah having night terrors when she first came to live with him. Maaya had been adamant about wanting to stay, and Izumi didn't seem bothered, either. Could they really have come to prefer a place like this?

No way. Even if they did, there's no way I'd find another world more appealing than Earth. Home is where the true crime podcasts are. Home is where the white noise machine is. Home is anywhere, anywhere but a strange world where I suddenly burst at the seams with light magic. I'm not the nerd that my friends are. I don't belong here. I don't.

"Please," Lavender says again. "If you won't do it for me or for him, consider doing it for justice."

"I'm sorry?"

"Consider justice. It is illegal to kidnap someone, no matter the wrongs they have committed against you."

My sense of reason will be the death of me. Stupidly, I promise, "Ask me in the morning, okay?"

"I can do that. Good night, Lady Hiyori."

Lavender's face shimmers and disappears. I close the mirror and put it back on the dresser. I have no time to consider the matter because sleep soon overtakes me.

"Hi-yo-ri!" Izumi's voice calls from outside my door, waking me with a start.

"What is it?" I yell back.

"We have a guest! You'll never guess."

But I can guess.

Sure enough, when we all descend to the first floor, Lavender is waiting in one of Lord Windwood's many rooms, armed with the proposition of a lifetime.

I think we're about to rescue the Demon Lord.