PHASE 76 - WHO’S THE NAUGHTY GIRL?

A lot happened in that crazy mall tour. My butt spent eight hours on the van’s seat, accompanied the Idol Club in different malls, had a horrifying stay at the witch’s town, battled a nigh-omnipotent Eidolon, and then accompanied the girls on their concerts to different cities again. It was so tiring that I wanted to die.

I didn’t get enough sleep in that haunted shrine because I battled all night. Thankfully, I had the chance to recover my energy by resting on Tiara’s bouncy soft lap. We reserved the back seat of the van for the two of us only so that I can sleep peacefully. She even used her Silver Fox tails to keep me warm for the rest of the trip.

It was already night time when we arrived back in our lodging house in Dradecim City.

Strange… It seems that nobody is home. It was too quiet… and clean… and odorless. The living room has no mess at all and has been kept in a minimalistic approach. It’s like some other person has taken over the house.

“...Rikkun…” Tiara tapped my shoulder. “...I’m scared… It’s like this house is too tidy and soundless…”

“We’re no longer in Brightmore Town, Tiara. There’s no way we’ll see something horrifying here…”

“...I-I’ll trust you then, Rikkun!” She said as she clung unto my arms. What a scaredy pup!

There are rays of light coming from the gaps in the door in Heushac’s room. I know that somebody’s inside. This scene is identical to those horror movie cliches where the protagonist would slowly turn the knob and push the door gently.

As I opened the door, I saw something truly horrifying.

A slightly tanned man with blue hair is sitting on the ground. He was looking at the laptop which was on his bed. This man had his pants down, but he’s still on his boxers. On his left hand, is a bottle of lotion, and on his right, is a gooey white ketchup.

I couldn’t see the laptop screen, but it uttered girly moans that made my skin hair tingle. “Choke me, daddy!”

Heushac’s eyes widened in shock. The same goes for me. Our jaws hanged in surprise. Right now, we’re the finalists on the Who’s got the Best Horrified Face Contest.

Heushac immediately stood up with a reddish embarrassed face! “I-It’s not what you think! I’m watching how to apply lotion on a sunburnt area but then suddenly this weird ad popped up!”

“Sorry for the interruption.” I said as I slammed the door close. Then I leaned on the same door to protect my bro’s honor as a man. Tiara might peek at his personal matters.

“W-Who’s there, Rikkun?” Tiara innocently tilted her head slightly.

“J-Just a teenager who wanted to help himself.”

“Oh, so Heushac is training hard! I see!” Tiara pumped her fists as she convinced herself on her own explanation.

Suddenly, a feminine voice made an entrance.

“Oh. Tiara. Alaric. I see that you guys are back.”

When we turned around we saw a slightly tall woman with knee-long white hair. She has this reddish-purple eyes. And this woman is wearing a black maid dress that easily gives off her skinny white thighs. This woman has a cute expressionless face like those sex dolls...err...I mean robot mannequins.

“Who are you?” Tiara and I asked at the same time.

“Huh? I’m Key…”

<>

I can’t believe it. That NEET homunculus child has grown up in just a matter of days! She’s now tall and slender, and somewhat sexy due to her bulked-up breasts and thighs (FBI don’t come at me!) She now looks like on the same age as mine.

And there are some changes in her personality too. She’s a little casual when talking to us, but her AI smartphone accent remains the same.

Right now, we laid down on the living room as Key gave us some chamomile tea. This homunculus cosplaying and acting like a maid… I kind of like it.

“I don’t know what happened. I just woke up this morning and realized that my body has grown this much. The shrine maidens of Heightsburg was also confused.” Key explained in a monotone. “...Do I look weird?”

“N-No! Not at all, Key-chan!” Tiara blurted out. “Y-You look gorgeous!”

“...Is that so…” Key bowed down but her blushing cheeks are still visible. I think he just installed Human Emotions app on her memory card.

Suddenly, a light hand patted my shoulder. It was Heushac, and he butted in on our conversation.

“I was surprised too. I never knew that artificial humans can evolve!”

“Get your hands off me, you filthy wanky!” I slapped Heushac’s hand away.

“M-Maybe there’s something that triggered your growth hormone!” Tiara pumped her fist, proudly giving her illogical hypothesis. “Tell me, Key-chan… What did you eat these past few days?”

“...Ummm…” Key tilted her head with a poker face, and it makes it a lot more adorable. “I only eat that hot white gooey soup that Heushac made.”

“Wai-Whaaaaat!?”

My jaws hanged for a moment there and then looked at Heushac with curled eyebrows. Heushac immediately pulled himself away from me as he gave a nervous laugh.

“I-It’s not what you think!” Heushac waved both of his hands to me. Then he gave an angry glare to the white-haired homunculus. “Hey, stop spouting weird contexts! It’s porridge! Porridge!”

“...Oh yeah, right. It’s called porridge.” Key answered with no expression whatsoever.

“Are you sure you’re not teaching this girl some dirty things when we’re gone?” I cringed to Heushac.

“Of course!” Heushac still had his face blushing as he bravely denied my accusation. “I don’t have any perverted intention to a minor!”

I don’t trust Heushac. He’s guilty unless proven innocent. I have to ask Key just to make sure.

I turned to Key with a gravely serious glare. “Are you sure it’s just porridge? Are there some sausages involved?”

Bam!

Suddenly, a swift right hook broke my jaw and left my head buried in the tiny gap of the sofa! That punch was indubitably Tiara’s right fist! “Stop saying dirty things in front of a child, Rikkun!”

Ignoring the whole situation, Key left an answer to my question. “Yes. I’m sure it’s porridge. I’m surprised too that Heushac can cook a delicious rice soup.”

“W-Well, I learned the recipe from a certain cooking anime…” Heushac scratched his head.

“T-There’s no way a simple porridge will make you grow that fast…” Tiara said. Duh, of course, Sherlock. She moved on to another question. “What other things did you do when we’re not here?”

Key slightly curved her lips, a single hint of a smile. “I learned so many things.”

Then Key stood up and elegantly bowed like a maid. “Heushac taught me about proper manners and how to wear cosplay dresses. He also taught me how to clean the house and prepare a healthy tea. And more importantly, he taught me a lot of things on how to properly serve a master.”

Tiara’s jaws hanged, and her eyes are widely opened. She immediately got her face red, but she hid her lower face with her white hands.

“S-S-So you guys are d-d-d-doing those kinds of n-n-naughty plays too…” Tiara muttered.

“Stop giving off misleading stories, Key! We didn’t do any naughty play!” Heushac embarrassingly exclaimed as he aggressively pointed to the white-haired homunculus. “You equipped yourself with that maid uniform on your own conviction! You even pressed me to teach you everything about cosplay because you said that you want to become as cute as Jeannette!”

“...Heushac is right. I thought that mimicking hobbies of normal high school girls would add some personality.” Key said. “Also… I saw how beautiful Tiara is in a maid uniform so I chose this kind of costume.”

I’m losing my crap over this matter. I’m already exhausted, so I must go to sleep. But before I escape the scene, Heushac opened his mouth that revived a topic that should have been buried a while ago.

“Hey, Tiara. You said that phrase ‘doing those kinds of naughty plays too’. ‘TOO?’ You mean you had a naughty master-and-servant play with someone?”

Tiara, still having her cheeks tomato red, shyly answered Heushac’s nonsensical question.

“W-W-Well, it’s more of a master-and-dog kind of play… Rikkun gave me doggy commands … and even asked me to sing and dance while undressing… Recently, he asked me to be his lap pillow…”

Key and Heushac now had their turn to leave their jaws hanging as they were truly astounded by that revelation! Then they gave me this skeptical glare! The table has completely turned against me!

“...Alaric, you disgusting perv…” They both said.

I should have stapled that stupid witch’s mouth!