Think of this as a confessional.

Being such, much like a real confessional, there's a lot of things in here you don't ever want to hear from anyone, let alone a fourteen year old.

Especially from a fourteen year old.

Then add on top that I'm a girl.

Does that make sense?

Let me make this clear: I'm not holding anything back in this or sugar coating for an 'audience,' so if you encounter something you dislike, well:

WARNING: A YOUNG WOMAN'S ACCOUNT OF SEXUALITY.

I got back from the date. I still didn't have a phone, so I couldn't call and ask where everyone was.

"Hello?" I knocked on Jade's and Tayler's door.

I peeked inside. Nobody.

I saw their dirty underwear on the floor, neither of them was exactly as tidy as me, I noticed. It was taking some getting used to.

I looked around the house for a note… nothing.

It was only me.

...Good. This was really good, even.

I was practically rubbing my hands together like a villain.

No, really. I even said "heehee," outloud.

I was already tingling, literally. Actually, I have been tingling. All freaking day, I've been trying to not touch myself, all freaking day.

It feels like I'm going to explode!

I ran to my room—no—I flew into that room at mach speed, I made speedracer look like a freaking snailracer, and NASA only wishes they could go this ludicrously fast.

The speed of a horny teenager, for sure.

I was wearing hand-me-down clothes Jade gave me, but they all flew off at warp speed, too, seeming to teleport to their final destinations on the floor.

If you're reading this Jade, thank you for the clothes! They fit a lil' baggy, but I actually kinda like that.

Wait, actually, please stop reading! I'd have to kill myself from the embarrassment if I knew you read this!

This is how I like to do things:

Wait, I forgot the cucumber! Fuck!

I ran back to the kitchen, even forgetting I was buck naked besides socks.

It didn't matter to me even if someone did see, the point is that I was unaware I was naked, that's how silly horny I was.

I slid into the kitchen on my brand new socks, the way only new socks will let you.

Skkkkrt.

I grabbed the cucumber and ran back. I really couldn't wait!

I'd been thinking for a while now about using this bad boy.

When I wondered if Tayler had a condom I could put on it.

You're probably thinking: really?

Listen to this, though—what do you do if it breaks off inside you?

You might have to go to the hospital. How embarrassing, what a reputation to have!

No way am I risking that!

I went up to Tayler's night stand and checked the bottom drawer.

Bingo, first try! In a shoebox, but what else is gonna be in there?

And there were so many, wow.

I looked for one my friend had told me about: Trojan, For Her—

I really was in luck today, they had them. Then I noticed… it. A real sex toy. It looked too big to be comfortable, though.

On my way out, I saw Jade's lacy panties again, next to Tayler's boxers.

I took her panties and ran out, then back into my room.

At some point I got worked up at what I was going to be doing.

I was already breathing hard.

I put a towel down, just in case. I had a strong feeling I'd be needing it.

Let's try that again.

This is how I like to do things:

First, I stick my butt out in the air and put a pillow where my chest is going to be at.

It's like a whole body workout.

Today, I replayed in my head the kiss I got at the end of the date. Over and over I so vividly played it back and felt it again. A few times I had to stop because of how sensitive I was.

Then I rolled on my back, which means its cucumber time.

My friend was right about the condom, those are 'ribbed.'

I remembered I have the panties and grab them from next to me.

My whole body shivers, spasms, and tenses.

I look down—

I knew that towel would come in handy...

I try to move but—well, that is not happening, that's the bottom line.

I snuggle up with my blanket and try to catch my breath.

It's a few minutes later before I can do anything. My face is still flush and I feel a bit weak in the legs.

It's been a whole year since that's happened, a session intense like that…

I lay in bed and think about my history masturbating. It's a long, 'storied history' for a fourteen year old.

It's actually a problem at this point. When I get really stressed—like most of this past year—I just can't stop myself.

Let me explain, I guess.

As long as I can remember, which is since I was four years old, I've touched myself.

Thankfully, nobody has touched me that I didn't want to… to be clear, the list of people who have is a few neighborhood girls when I was a kid. But we'll get there.

How it started: "woah, climbing this rope to the tree house up and down feels really good. What the heck is that?"

The answer was the place mom told me to be careful and delicate with. It was special, I knew even then. But most of all, before it was anything else, before it was even mine to do what I wanted with, I was told to be modest with it.

What they were trying to say was, at that stage of life, to not show it to people or let them touch me there, if I could help it or had even a bit of say in the matter.

But as years went on, the rules became more strict than that, without ever telling me a healthy outlet.

Nobody ever actually told me a healthy view of sexuality, nobody taught me anything about it, and I blame this partly on my problems now.

But I digress. All I was told was how to be modest—this was told to me very seriously, so I knew it was very important.

The first thing I did, then, was fool around with my childhood friend.

A girl named Kayla, she didn't get out of it what I got out of it, not even a fraction. Still, it was fun, if only as our little secret.

It was only after that, maybe 8 months later, that I went up and down the rope till I was blistered and sore that I realized, oh, if you just touch it directly… that's a fudgin' powerplay, right there.

Another girl I'd meet later, in 2nd grade, she moved in a couple houses down; with the most beautiful dark skin... her name was Imani.

She saw her parents go down on each other, and we both tried it out based on her limited knowledge.

She thought her parents were drinking each other's pee. Guess what I still have a fetish for?

She ended up moving suddenly after they caught us in the act.

By then it was 4th grade and I missed her a lot. I ended up making another friend to fill the hole she left. She was insanely tame next to me, however, and her mom had the most sensitive hearing in the world, to my dismay. She'd always catch us talking about things we 'shouldn't know.'

Balance, people, balance is key. Which is ironically exactly what I don't have, making this a problem.

This girl was named Brenna, by the way, and I was in a puppy dog love with her that would never be reciprocated. She had that sort of elegance to her that I wish I could have, she was basically the opposite of me in all ways, and so it was no wonder I liked her.

One day we went to the bathroom together and I—in my infinite wisdom—asked her if I could wipe her, hoping to get close in any way possible.

This caught her attention as naughty—yet also acceptable.

I'll never understand why, I didn't think it'd work even then.

I purposefully tore a hole wiping, begging her to let me do it more later because she was definitely enjoying it.

She said, "wait, are you gay?" and promptly told her mom. Her mom told me if 'it happened again,' she'd not allow me over.

I've never been more embarrassed in my life than those two moments, and it was just today that I got over being called gay that once in 4th grade. I'm at the start of freshman year right now.

In fifth grade I caught feelings for another girl—she was an ugly duckling and I knew it. I mean, if she was gonna look even a fraction as good as her mom who I also was crushing on, she'd be fine. Her name was Anna. She moved the next year.

Middle school went by with me kidding myself that I liked guys. It was no wonder those were the dark ages of my life.

By the time I hit 6th grade I masturbated multiple times a day. In 7th grade it was the worst, and I mean it was almost a legitimate problem that I considered getting help for.

'Girls aren't supposed to be sexual, boys are all the mindless horny ones.'

These words from society haunted me. I didn't know who to turn to. My mom had only ever told me that my body was a blessing, but never what to do with it besides "protect it from others."

To add on top of this, I knew I liked girls over any boy, but that it wouldn't be accepted by my friend group and family.

I'd wake up with my hands still in my undies—I was an especially late bloomer amongst girls, but thankfully not ugly—and I'd go to town till I was satisfied.

At some point in the day I'd If I didn't do it at school then by the time I got home I would be so pent up that it'd take me all night to calm myself down, so I just did it at school.

Then, most days, I rubbed myself gently through my underwear when I was doing homework. Eventually, I couldn't focus on homework without doing it—I actually still can't.

And finally, when I fall asleep, or should I say to be able to fall asleep, I have to get off no matter how long it takes.

And this summer I would be always rubbing myself in some capacity—it seems stress directly correlates to how high my drive is.

At the end of 8th grade I told my mom maybe half of that—leaving out the most personal stuff, I don't have a death wish or anything!

She called me a nympho, not even halfway through, but in a tone that denoted to be one was a fate worse than death.

And now I was taking a leap of faith, you could say.

The first one to sit down at this table with me, I'll confess my atypical libido to them that I've kept secret for so many years.

I guess in that way, I was leaving it up to fate. Depending on which person I got to sit down with—it could make or break it.

I couldn't decide who would be best to tell about this, but I needed to ask someone for advice.

While we're on the topic…

Tay and Jade were banging all freaking night, not sure why, but since their bed is against my wall I got to partly 'feel the rocking' and couldn't get my mind out of the gutter.

What I'm saying is I'm pretty tired, yet still not as tired as Mr. Cucumber.

Those Trojans should be illegal, it's that good. Cucumbers, however, are only dangerous to girls and boys too afraid to order a real sex toy.

Keep that in mind, parents.

Now I've got a girlfriend. I'm not gonna lose her because I'm too clingy or am too obsessed with sex, or whatever it is lesbians call siscoring!

Damn, I really, really wanted to do that already!

No! Now is the time to act! Do something about my absurd 'hyposexuality!'

Er—or was it hyper or hypo?

I really am tired.

"Ah! When did you sit down, Tay!"

"Tay, huh? I'll let you call me that—it's enduring when you say it." He gave me a faint smile, looking up from his phone.

Damn it all! I got hot and bothered remembering the sound of him and Jade moaning during their all night sexcepades!

"Uh… would you like to go for a walk with me? I need to talk to you alone, and it's gonna take awhile."

"Yeah, I was just thinking I need some air."

- - - -

I just finished telling him everything.

While I was telling the story he would say 'mhm,' and 'hm,' occasionally, but let me talk for a good hour to get it all out.

I expected I'd be very embarrassed, but I felt even more comfortable now that I'd told him.

I'd even told him what I did yesterday, everything.

"Yeah," he finally said after thinking. "You left the door open and I saw the cucumber when I came home last night. You didn't even turn off your light."

After all that, now I was bright red, but mostly at frustration with myself.

"No worries, though. Jade had a good laugh and I think that's perfectly normal—I've got a similar story you could say."

"Wait, really… you're not just saying that, are you?"

"Mhm. In middle school I rubbed myself raw all the time. Do you know how I might've fixed that—well, mostly fixed, as you now know."

"No, tell me! That's what I need help with!"

"I joined kendo. It's kind of like… a traditional type of Japanese sword fighting. There's a dojo in this town. If you're interested I'll enroll you today, or whenever."

"Wait—how'll that help, exactly?"

"Exercise releases the feel good chemicals that you get from sex and masturbation—so if you exercise, you'll naturally not want to rub one out as much. And also, if you're training right, you'll usually be so tired you won't have the energy to."

"I'll do it. Start me today."

"Really?"

It seems I caught him off guard.

"It worked for you, I don't need any more reason than that. I'll do it."

He rubbed my head.

"Don't mess up my hair! I just brushed it!" I pouted.

He had a grin that could only be described as shit-eating.

Then all-a-sudden—he picked me up like a sack-of-something and spun me around!

"Ah!" I screamed, "ahh!"

"Maw-ha-ha-ha!" He laughed.

By the time he put me down I was dizzy and disoriented.

"Oh, yeah! Let's go pick out a cheap phone for you."

What a rollercoaster being around this man was!

"What's the big deal! Why the evil laugh!"

"I'm going to help make you into the strongest fighter around, that's all. Stronger than even me."

"..."

I still had no idea what kinda world I was in for.

"You could also tell your therapist about it when you see them. Maybe a professional has better ideas than me?"

Good point, but...

"I'd be too embarrassed, I think…"

"Well, if it's a problem you should try and tell them some of it, maybe just more discrete, skim the details, you know? Also, try Jade. I can relay it to her, if you want."

"That would be great!"

"She's pretty smart, smarter than me for sure. I wouldn't doubt it if she had some sort of outside-the-box approach."

- - - -

"Tay, this is a jewelry store."

"Yeah, didn't I say? I need your help picking something out for Jade."

He didn't say that, I was certain, but decided against saying that and opted for saying—

"What exactly for? Hmm? What's the occasion—hmmm?" I got really close to his face with the biggest smile.

He backed away a bit in his seat.

"It looks like you can guess... I'm gonna propose."

"Oh. My. God!"

"What's with girls praising God for life events…"

"I'm so happy for you! Yay!"

"Thank you. I guess you also got someone special to you now, huh? Seems like she's motivating you to better yourself, or am I reading too far in?"

"You're right, you just have no idea."

"I'll listen if you talk."

I sighed. "She moved here in 7th grade. She has a bunch of piercings from over the summer when she went to Mexico to visit family, although she doesn't exactly look Hispanic, if that makes sense?"

"Yeah, that's not all that unusual. You look Asian, but I know you're not actually a significant percentage Asian. It just came out in your face."

"You're too smart!"

"Ha! You should meet this girl I met the other day, Deirde. She takes the cake for smarts. Anyways, go on."

"She's always been nice to me but we never had a class together, I've secretly admired her for two whole years."

"Ah, admired from afar. Classic tale of love."

"Let's go inside and look," I said excitedly, practically jumping up and down in my seat.

"You know, you really do remind me of myself…"

It was a pretty normal store, as far as jewelry stores went. Not that I've been to many, it's just exactly what you imagine it to look like.

That's to say it exuded mock fancinesn.

It didn't have the elegance that the senior year building had—that was just absurd. This place was just trying to emulate that type of taste.

"So, what were you thinking? Going for a simple ring, or what?"

"Something simple she can wear everyday with everything, if she wants. Has to be unisex, I'm thinking. "

"Just get her a silver band then. She already wears a silver cross necklace and earrings, it'll match."

"...Isn't that too easy?" He wiped sweat from his forehead.

"You must really be freaking out about this… look, you wanted simple, right? It doesn't get more simple than that. Spend big on the wedding ring, go simple for engagement."

"What'd you like if you got proposed to?"

Blood rush to my face. "Don't ask stupid questions."

"Excuse me for interrupting your conversation, I couldn't help but notice you seem to need some help."

A mustached employee approached us, a mustache straight from the 80's, clashing with his fine suit.

He gave us a proper bow.

"Tell me this person's name you are shopping for, and the occasion."

"Jade—real name Jaden Richter. She's my true love, and I'd like to propose."

The man motioned for us to come with him.

He sat at a desk and picked a book out of many on that desk, flipping through.

"How's this?"

He landed on a page like he knew them all inside out, pointing to a picture.

"This is perfect… wow…" Tay trailed off, putting his right hand on his left check.

It really was perfect, but, "what exactly is it made of?"

"Green gold, 14k, the set for the half-heart is sterling silver for more durability. It's a very low profile, yet still stylish in its own right."

"How much are you asking?"

"It's normally $400, but if you do me a favor I'll give it to you for $100."

"...A favor? You seem pretty well off, though," Tay said.

"I've got a pretty big problem, actually. Do you believe in the supernatural, by chance?"

"Uh… you could say the past four or five days have been nothing but that. Why do you ask?"

The man made a motion to come closer, and he whispered something to Tay I couldn't hear well.

Tay finally pulled away and said, "Ah, I've been there. Behind the used car dealership. You can say the rest in front of Sophie, she's been there even more than me."

Wait, what does that mean? Don't make it sound like I'm a regular there… and what's with how wide mustache man's eyes got?

"Long story short, the person there gave me a… creature, something from the very depths of the ocean, if I had to guess." He motioned for Tayler to come closer. "It's a…" he whispered the next part into Taylers ear.

"Oh wow," he really was shocked now. "It really does that?"

"Yes…" the man nodded gravely.

"I'll take it off your hands, but only if you lower the price to nothing."

"Shrewd man. I've no choice, it's a deal. Don't forget to lock it at night…"

They shook on it.

The man wordlessly went into another room at the back of the store.

"What is it?"

"It seems the Mage gave him a shapeshifting tentacle monster."

What!

We walked out of the jewelry store with a ring box, holding a beautiful green theme ring for the gorgeous Jade, a woman turned hermaphrodite and loved by Tay.

"What're you gonna do with the 'tentacle monster?'"

We also left the jewelry store with a monster trapped in a clay jar that had two openings. Tay told me that's how you trap an octopus, because they can get out of even 'the finest net.'

Not that I knew what that looked like, or what he was talking about.

"I gotta see it for myself first, see exactly how smart it is, you know, how dangerous it is."

"Didn't that guy say it was a monster, doesn't that mean it's dangerous by definition?"

"He meant it in another way… let's just say the man was sucked dry."

"I don't get it."

Tay whispered a few words in my ear. "But don't worry, it only likes guys."

"But you're a guy!"

"Don't worry, I have a plan."

"..."

Maybe thirty minutes later, just across this plavillion shopping center, I had a phone. It was a matte yellow Windows phone.

When we stepped outside it was a downpour, raining cats and dogs.

I felt truly happy, truly loved, in this moment, holding onto the sleeve of Tay's sweatshirt.

I knew that was a bit of a dramatic response to a cheap phone, but it's also the thought behind it.

Any phone is better than no phone, that's just the truth of it. Besides when your texting on a flip phone, that's just torture.

The human race really are a resilient bunch to have survived until smartphones were finally invented.

"Tayler, why were you banging all night long, anyways? Even I would have trouble going like you guys were." I tried to hide that I was teasing him, but couldn't stop smiling.

"Oh, thanks for reminding me!"

He took out his phone (I'd already got his number) and made a call over Bluetooth.

"Guten tag, Tayler Lovelace." A soft spoken woman's voice answered.

I wanted her to tell me a bedtime story every night—just by itself and with only that single sentence, I could tell her voice was an 'intoxicating' one.

Wait, how did my question remind him of her!

"Hi, Deirde. Do you need anything, would you like me to stop by and chat? How do you feel?"

"You're woman called me earlier asking the same thing. She'll come over and keep me company today, maybe help around the house—and hold the baby."

She said that in complete monotone, under normal circumstances it would sound a bit rude, but somehow in her tone and tenor it came across as just normal.

"She's gonna get funny ideas, isn't she?"

"You're so many steps behind, Tayler, that only god himself could keep track of a number as high."

"Duly noted… I'll leave it to her, then." He said it like his hands weren't full already.

"And I'll leave you to your guest in the car. As if you aren't busy yourself… learn to chew your bites."

She hung up.

"What an intense person!" I said.

"Truly," Tay agreed. "Me and… well, Jade, just Jade really—helped her deliver a baby. And not any baby, a Moon Child. You could say the night was supercharged, after that happened."

Tay explained to me what a huge impact it had on him and Jade, making my attempt to tease him into a touching story of the birth of life.

- - - -

We were a couple blocks away from my school, in a nearby residential district.

Yeah, it's called a dojo, but that doesn't mean it has to look like one from a Kung Fu movie…

It looked almost silly next to all the normal houses, and if not silly it was certainly out of place.

Like it was lost in time and space, maybe.

"Everything in there will seem foreign to you—and has a Japanese name—but nobody is expecting you to learn it all at once," Tay assured me.

I didn't need any assurance, however. I wasn't afraid, not even a tiny bit.

How do I put this? It felt like I was starting a new part of my life. I was excited over nervous.

He led the way down a stone path to the house and let himself in, we then took our shoes off (I was just following his lead) and turned a corner that held a huge open room with shiny wooden floors.

Along the walls were places to hang equipment, like swords of all types.

There was only one older man, much more Asian looking than me. He seemed to be practicing his swings, and after a few more hits he turned to us with a look of shock.

"Lovelace, what a surprise! You look like a different person!"

They clasped each other on the back. How cliché…

"Greg, I brought a young lady I'm taking care of," he gestured back to me. "Sophia… um…" he turned to me.

He forgot my last name!!

"—Just call me Sophie Lovelace," I gave a big smile, pretending to not be upset.

He stuck out his hand and we shook, his grip was gentle, yet I could tell he was strong.

"We're here to have her join."

"Why do you want to join a martial art, young lady?" He seemed almost concerned.

"Uh…" to help me with my hypersexuality? What the hell was I supposed to say? "To… see how far I can push myself! Yeah!"

I stole that from a Kung Fu movie, but it did the job.

The man pointed to a rack with swords and said to me: "take your pick, I'll place you right now if you're ready."

I went over and got one, feeling it in my hands as I paced over to where the old man went in the middle.

"That's a shinia, Soph."

He picked now to give me a nickname… "I don't need to learn anything first?"

"Nope," Tay shot out.

"Wouldn't be much of a martial art if you had to know it before you could practice it," Greg explained.

I put the 'hilt' of the sword in my hands and gripped tight.

It just… felt right.

I can't really explain it, it's as if I'd held it before… no, as if I've held it a thousand times already.

I put it up the same way the old man had it.

"Hmph," he studied me.

My blood was pumping now, I could hear it in my ears.

Everything not in my vision disappeared from reality. There was only that man in front of me, my opponent.

If you'd ask me who I was, I wouldn't be able to answer.

The old man shifted his weight and I stayed put, only swiveling around as he moved.

His sword was moving around like a pendulum, but slow, testing the best place to put a strike.

And I was reacting in turn to his position.

Then like lightning—

We clashed.

Clink.

He assumed a new position, further away, so that the sword was at a more natural and barely titled position.

I was too—copying him, to be fair.

I was like a mirror of him—discounting my age, gender, and great height difference.

I didn't see his sword even move more than half a foot away from mine, but it suddenly hit mine with a considerable force—

Reflex—up—and to the left—

I just barely knocked it out of the way of my throat.

My eyes were wide, I knew.

And then I saw the man smirk. Something about it angered me.

The man put up his hand and lowered his sword.

"We'll be needing bogu for this," the man let out a laugh—as if our encounter was nothing, meant nothing. He walked off to another room.

"That's armor, bogu means protective armor," Tay said. "Come here." He was sitting on the dojo floor funny, basically sitting on his legs.

"Yeah?" I huffed.

"Rely on your guts more. If you want to win, keep your shinia like this," he held his hand to demonstrate the position. I mimicked him with my shinia. "Your trying to knock the sword out of the way long enough for an opening. Do you understand what an opening means?"

I nodded my head at him. I really think I did understand.

"Trust your gut," he clapped me on the shoulder.

I turned around, feeling the presence of the barefoot man, now wearing armor like I would. He was carrying equipment.

"For now, put on these," he handed me three pieces of armor. "Did I get the right size?"

"..."

"It should feel like it's not coming off, but not squeezing you either."

"...Yeah, it fits."

It really did.

We drifted over to the center and raised our swords.

They were both low positions, preventing either of us getting close.

There was a different aura surrounding this man now that we donned this armor, he felt more threatening, radiating off the clear energy of a strong and good teacher.

I was really wishing right about now that I was a taller person. My short stature makes it so that I have to be closer than I want to be...

I inched closer, at a crawl—using only my toes to see if he'll let me in.

This time our swords barely waver from their positions at all.

Like a standoff—no, not like one.

This is one.

He makes a fast and concise cut to my helmet—I dodge straight back—then get back in before he can advance.

No other way around it, I have to get a feel for the swing… I gotta get in there.

I make a cut down connecting the tips—quickly changing my feets position into a sprint—using the bounce it gives off the–clink–of our swords—

All in a fluid motion, I throw the sword over my shoulder, charge in, then slash down.

Almost!

He brought his sword up at a side angle, just at the last second—it was a beautiful parry. He riposted then, in a near circular motion, bringing it back down.

I had no choice but to parry my sword back up.

But I didn't have the coordination.

He landed a clean hit on my wrist.

We fought with intensity like that for… I have no idea how long. I'd lost track of my sense of time, which happens when you're highly engaged.

Eventually I found myself panting and soaked with sweat, but that wasn't enough to ask for a break.

Because this was actually fun.

"Yame—stop, Sophia," Tayler said just above his normal voice.

I froze—or more like I came back to reality… I realized how quiet it was here, it was like night and day from a moment ago.

I took off my helmet and huffed out a breath I didn't realize I had, and looked around for a clean rag.

Tay and Greg stared at each other, as if communicating telepathically.

"What'd you teach her prior to this..." Greg asked Tay cautiously.

"This is my first time holding a sword," I answered him, huffing.

He turned to me. "I've seen natural talent, but that's something else. Young lady… you have a gift."

Taylers voice cut through the air. "The question is: where will you place her?" He looked rather elegant, seated like he was, legs neatly under him and back straight.

"Yes, that's what I'm thinking of… Sophie, was it? Would you prefer a 'head start,' or would you like to start from the beginning?"

"...Throw me in the deep end. I want to see if I can swim."

The sunset on my face felt good. Fall was just about here, peeking its head out at us.

I sprawled out on the cars seat. Tay wasn't joking, I really would have no energy for anything else.

"I want some hot coco, I think. How about you, Jade?"

"I'm Sophie!"

"Oops! Oh yeah, you said your last name was Lovelace back there… what do you mean by that exactly?"

"That I want you to be my dad, duh."

"I'd be fitting, you're a surprising mix of Jade and I."

"I could see how I'm like you, but like Jade, too?"

"Definitely. I see the connection, at least. It's hard to describe why, but maybe if we look at it like 'how different you are,' you'll see what I mean."

I thought about it. "You know, that was actually sorta profound. I'm surprised that came from you."

"Hey, I'm nothing if not profound… and now we're completely off topic. I talked to Jade about this last night, actually. I'd like to adopt you someday, and Jade would too. It would be kind of a symbolic adoption, since it won't actually change much... but that's important sometimes, right?"

"I'd love for you and Jade to be my parents, I meant it when I said it the first time."

Tayler looked over with a million dollar smile. "Even if we can't adopt you, I'll always love you like family."

- - - -

"Three… two… one… GO!"

I unsealed the jar!

Tayler was standing menacingly with a wooden katana!

What was going on?

Five minutes earlier:

Tayler walked out of his room holding a wooden sword with a curve.

He wasn't messing around, I didn't know why, but you could sense it—he knew how to use that sword—

Just from the way he walked down the hall—he could kill you with it, I knew instinctively. Kill with efficiency.

It was mesmerizing.

"Soph, I need you to open this seal right here on a countdown. We're gonna see what this tentacle monster is made of."

I wanted to say: no! you'll get raped!

But with that aura around him… he might just stand a chance. I nodded.

Reluctantly, but I did agree.

Present:

"Woah!"

It really was an octopus!

But it was cuuuute! ♡

"Sophia! Get off that thing, it could be dangerous! It could—"

I was rolling on the floor squeezing the life out of it! "Sooo cuuuute!! Ouch!"

I was bonked on the head! And the octopus floated away…

"Huh," Tayler said.

"Is that even physically possible…"

It really was floating around the living room like it was swimming in water.

And then it stretched—changed colors from orange to blue to white…

Floating in the air was me.

In a t-pose. And naked.

"It didn't get the scars right," I pointed out.

SWISH.

I didn't even see the sword move—when I looked back at the octopus—"Ah—! Animal abuse!"

It looked dead!

"Go back to your jar if you're gonna be a perv," Tayler said calmly, yet with enough of an aura at the moment to make a serial killer jealous.

He leaned down and showed his phone to the octopus, who was still splat-looking across the floor like it'd been hit by a semi going 80.

To be fair, it might as well have been.

"Turn into this, Pi."

"Aw! You didn't even ask me if I had a good name for it…"

"Is Pi not good enough?"

"...It's aight."

The octopus—now named Pi—turned into a puppy.

A wolf puppy.

"Doesn't seem dangerous to me," Tay shrugged.

"That's because you put some beat down into it… poor thing will never be the same."

"I wonder if I can train it to defend this house?"

"Your lofty ideas know no bounds." I tried touching it… "Tay, it really is an actual puppy—with fur, real fur."

"You're welcome to pet it, but it stays with me until I can be sure it's trustworthy."

Jade walked in the front door around that time.

"Hi—why is that puppy floating?"

"It's name is Pi, and it's an octopus shapeshifter!" I said.

"Oh? Well then. Sophie, would you like a girls night sometime?"

It felt good to belong to this growing family.

Until next time—this has been Sophia.