"Please don't kill me!"

They deserved it.

"You're a Jedi. You can't kill me. I'm defenceless."

That's just a stupid trick thugs use on Jedi. Did they really think I was that senseless? Did they really think I cared?

"A Jedi uses the force for knowledge and defence, never for attack."

Why not? The force is a weapon with untapped potential. It's not my fault if you're too afraid to use it. It's not my fault if you think aggression is a bad thing. Aggression is just making sure your enemy doesn't get the upper hand. What's so wrong with wanting that? What's so wrong with wanting power? What are you afraid of? Tell me what you're afraid of! You're afraid of innocents dying? Ha! You've killed your fair share of them! Don't act like you're so righteous! Don't act like you're better than everyone else! Why do you think so many have left your precious Order in the past? They realized you tried to brainwash them! All you want is control! Well you won't control me! I'm getting out! You hear me? I've finally had a taste of freedom and I loved it! I've finally had a taste of what I'm capable of and I loved it. I'm sick of your narrow-minded dogma. I am not a Jedi. I am NOT a Jedi. I AM NOT A JEDI!

A scream resounded in Rain's mind and she awoke from her dream with a jolt. She ran an unsteady hand across her sweat-covered forehead, tears running down her face, her breath sounding ragged. She bit back a sob, not wanting to wake Mira.

I'm sorry, Mira.

If Mira had known what had occurred on Trandosha, she would no doubt rather have not been rescued at all.

When the twins had returned to the Temple, they had been greeted with relief and even joy. Rain could clearly remember the moment when Master Aayla had raced up to her and wrapped her in a warm hug, saying how thankful she was that Rain was alive. Rain couldn't recall ever seeing her Master so happy to see her. After she and Mira had been thoroughly welcomed back, they were summoned before the Council. Mira freely spoke of what had happened to her, but Rain hardly said a word. The Council knew something was up, she could tell from their guarded looks to one another, but they probably had no idea of the severity of the unknown events on Trandosha. In an attempt to keep order, the Council decided that although they were glad to see the sisters safe and sound, Rain had still disobeyed several orders and required a penalty. They decided to send her to Kamino to be put under the supervision of none other than Mira's Master, Shaak Ti. Rain could understand why. Shaak Ti oversaw the training of the clones and was known for her love of teaching and utter abhorrence of violence. Mira had often spoken very highly of her Master, but that didn't mean Rain had to like her.

Tomorrow she would be tossed on a ship and sent to Kamino, a planet covered in perpetual floods and storms, a place where she wouldn't be able to see Mira again for who knew how long, a place where she'd have nothing to do except watch newbies learn how to fight and listen to Master Ti droning on and on about things that she'd already heard a thousand times. Rain wasn't quite sure which of those things upset her the most.

I guess I'll find out when I get there.

How had it come to this? She felt like her life had been ripped away from her; she wasn't in control anymore. Maybe she'd never been. Maybe at one point she had been content to take orders and believe what she was told, just like Mira did.

The war changed everything.

Had it really? Or had it just brought up deeply buried qualities she'd already possessed? With each step she'd taken further into herself, the knife had cut deeper, until she was bleeding pure emotion. Could she really keep lying to herself, believing that she could just keep on sucking it up and holding it in for her whole life?

I'm going to break. It's just a matter of time. I can feel it happening already.

Rain wiped away the tears streaking her face.

"You alright?"

Rain nearly jumped out of her skin at the sound of Mira's voice. She turned to see Mira sitting up, a worried expression on her face.

"Having trouble sleeping again? What's bothering you?"

Rain thanked the force that it was too dark for Mira to see the tears on her face.

"I'm fine," Rain answered, feeling her throat tighten as she forced out the lie.

Mira didn't seem convinced, "Is this about what happened in the Council Chamber? Why couldn't you just tell what happened on Trandosha?"

Rain took a deep breath, avoiding her sister's gaze.

"Nothing happened, Mira."

The concern melted from her little sister's face, replaced by betrayal, "You can't even tell me? We used to share everything, Rain."

Rain kept her eyes levelled at the floor. It took everything she had to stop the tears from resurfacing. All she wanted to do was be able to look Mira in the eye and confess the confusing and terrifying emotions she was feeling. All she wanted was for them to feel like sisters again. Mira had never wanted them to be at odds.

Is that what we are now? Enemies?

"Nothing happened, okay? Nothing."

She winced at the venom in her own voice. There was a long silence.

Then Mira turned over and muttered, "Goodnight."

And the conversation was over.