[9. What is the most motivating thing for you?]

Idk. Cookies maybe? I get a lot done with cookies. They’re tasty, and they make for pretty good bribes.

~~~

You know, sticking your fingers inside your body just feels wrong. It should feel more wrong, actually, but I’m only getting an uncomfortable tingle at the moment.

The misty stuff swirls around my fingers, brushing past with a cold feeling. I’m trying to move the stuff at the moment, trying to pull it out into the beginning of an arm. It’s like herding cats. The cells kinda move in the direction I want them to, but it’s like they gets easily distracted. Do cells have ADHD?

Right. ‘Cause that’s possible.

It’s a little bit easier to pull at them with my actual hand rather than trying to mess with them in my head, but the further I get them to come out of my body, the more wrong it feels. It’s starting to feel like someone’s pulling my esophagus out of my body. Let me tell you, that’s not a comfortable feeling. I’m actually managing it though. Somehow, it’s working. When I pull the cells out farther, my shell just kind of materializes around it. I won’t say it’s nice to watch. Kinda disturbing actually. I’m down to about my elbow at the moment. It’s getting harder as I go out.

After what’s probably like a half hour or so longer, I finally finish off the last bit of my pinky. It was exhausting. My new arm is still all tingly. It’s also tenuous, like a bubble that’ll pop the moment I stop thinking about it. But, hey, people, I have a freaking arm again! Look, I can wiggle my fingers! I can punch with it! Pow, pow, pow! Haha. It’s nice to have an arm again.

Ug, I feel gross, though. Definitely lost mass. I feel weak and very stretched thin at the moment. I’m not sure how I managed to keep this up unconsciously yesterday. Now that I can compare it to how I woke up this morning, it’s a stark difference, like the difference between feeling healthy and being hit in the face with the flu all at once (none of that gradual stuff). Massive gulf between the two. I don’t think I can keep this up for long. It’s draining.

Yup. Any second now. And . . . yeah, that’s my limit. I release my hold on keeping the arm together and the cells snap back into my body like some sort of putty rubber band, while the shell flakes off and dissolves into thin air.

I sigh. It’s frustrating. I was able to keep it up just fine yesterday? Well, mostly fine, but still. What’s the difference? Tension? Fight or flight? I was still kinda worked up even when I went to bed, a whole undercurrent thing. Mmmmm. I don’t know. I guess I’ll just have to practice before it becomes a natural thing for me to just summon my arm out of nowhere when I need it.

Don’t have an arm? Just make one. We’ve got the do-it-yourself tool kit that’s just right for beginners like you. Call in right now and we’ll give it to you 50% off! Today only!

Sigh. It’s depressing, but not as depressing as it once was. I’ve got options. For now, let’s practice making an arm again and then see if I can make the scythes into something better. Learning how to do it while multitasking might actually help. Maybe.

I start pulling out the ghosts cells again, using my mind this time. While working on that, I walk over and grab the broom, setting it next to the scythes on the counter. Then I go on a hunt through the drawers, looking for something that I’m pretty sure I saw yesterday. It’s hard to keep up rebuilding my arm while actively looking something. I keep slipping and the cells start traveling back towards my shoulder, but it’s not too bad. Manageable. I’m already halfway down to my elbow. Much faster than the first time. That’s a good sign.

Ah, there it is. I pull out a rough wooden box the size of my hand. I set it down on the counter and open it. Yup, a box of nails. They’re long, about the length of my thumb. I also pull out a couple of old rags and one of the nicer knives. I put them all on the counter and walk over to the big box next to the couch and pull out a short, heavy, metal hammer-y thing. I’m not sure exactly what it’s used for, but it works for my purposes. I leave it on the counter with everything else.

Alright, next, the cabinets next to the stove. I’m not sure it’ll be there, but I’m willing to bet it is. I ruffle through the shelves, checking all the jars I see, using my half-grown forearm to help push things out of the way.

Pickles, beans, peaches, some type of sauce, something round and reddish (pickled plums?), a thing of shredded white stuff. This one has a bunch of purple chunks. Daikon radishes by the look of it. Dad’s went on a this weird Asian pickled vegetable spree a few years back, so that’s why I know what random crap like that looks like. He really liked the diakons for whatever reason. Oh, this one’s cracked. Gross. Peas? Nasty. It’s molding. I accidentally get a whiff of smell leaking through the crack. I gag and throw it in the sink.

I check the growth of my hand. Yup, I got a feel for it now. I take a second or two to make the rest of my fingers (arm complete!) then get back to looking through the cabinet. Here’s some with some type of spice paste. And are these watermelon rinds? Weird. Next is artichoke hearts. Then, chicken? Please don’t be chicken. Um, another sealed jar of peaches. You know, are they alright to eat? I use my newly made right hand to twist open the lid. Huh, they still smell alright. I pull one out and take a bite. Yup, still fine, really sweet even. Alright, this’ll be my breakfast. I eat another one. While I’m at it, I pull out the ball of twine randomly sitting at the back of the shelf and throw it to my growing pile of stuff on the counter.

Oh, this jar is different. For one, it’s a lot bigger than the rest. It’s also the only one made out of metal. It takes me a couple of moments to open it even with two hands now. A pungent smell hits me. Very sour smelling, kind of like how fresh dried plums taste. I scrunch up my nose and look close at the clear syrup with a slight tan tint in the jar. I touch it a little. It’s hecka sticky, like super glue. Fist pump, item acquired. I’m sure of it. This is the resin that covers the paper lattices. I put the lid back on and set it on the counter. Alright. Let’s see. I think I have everything. Hopefully it’ll turn out better than a complete amature job.

Let’s start, then. I grab the broom off the counter and break off the broom head after some difficulty. What’s left is basically a staff with a nice heft. I give it a spin. The wood is thick, about as thick as a baseball bat handle, and could probably do some damage to someone on its business end. It’s a good weapon, but not what I’m looking for. I snap it in half with a heavy kick. That’s better. These feel about the right length. I use one of the scythes to shave off the spikey broken ends into something smoother, then put the two pieces of wood aside.

I take a look closer at the broken arm end of the scythe I’m holding. It’s almost as long as my hand is wide, and it’s sort of hollow inside. Around the edges of the inside of the arm is a hard sponge-like structure which is about the width of my pinky fingernail all the way around. The rest is open space. Is that stuff bone marrow? But there’s not really a bone. Not even any muscle. The outer part of the arm is skin, but it’s more like fossilized leather. It’s pretty hard. I’m not exactly sure how I broke it off. Maybe ‘cause it gets harder the closer it is to the blade? It’s a definitely a shell like I have (only mine feels like real skin). I wonder what the inside stuff is. I don’t have anything like that. Stuff to ponder later.

I grab the knife and start scraping out the inside of of the arm part of the scythe. Dust from the scrapes starts floating in the air. I sneeze. Gross. I really don’t wanna be breathing in this stuff. I keep scraping (trying to not breathe at all) until I get all the sponge stuff out. I then try to shove the open end onto one of the pieces of wood. Not quite. I shave off some of the wood. There, that’s better.

I take off the scythe again. It’s stuck pretty tight, so it takes me a while to pop it off. With some work, I drill four holes into the arm part. Then I grab the cloth and dip it into the resin, covering the inside of the scythe. I put the scythe back onto the piece of wood, wiping off the resin that squishes out.

After a few minutes using the metal hammer, I’ve got nails (also coated in resin just in case) hammered halfway into the wood through the holes I drilled into the arm part. I bend the nails down so they crimp the arm part to the wood, and I hammer them till they’re as flush with the arm part as they can be. I inspect my work, shaking the staff a little. That’s good. The scythe’s on there pretty tight. It doesn’t move at all. I give it spin. The weight’s a little bit off center, but I could get used to pretty quickly. My grip slips a little when I swing it, though. Hmmm. I pick up the ball of twine. It should be plenty. I unroll the ball and cut two pieces of string into equal lengths, then start wrapping one half around the part of the staff it felt most comfortable to hold. It’s a bit tricky to wrap it properly, but soon enough, I’ve got a nice grip. It’s a bit prickly, though, so I coat that in resin too.

Ok, that one’s done, let’s take a bit of a break. I release my hold on my arm, letting it disintegrate as I stretch. Oof. That’s tiring. I roll my neck. But that’s one done. I sigh contently and look at my work while eating peaches with one hand. It looks like a very short spear, with the scythe blade continuing out of the staff rather than at a right angle to it like you see with the grim reaper. Despite being so short, it looks rather intimidating, if I don’t say so myself.

I eat a few more peaches (dang they’re good) before spending a couple of minutes to remake my hand. Once I’m done with that, I start working on the other scythe. After about half and hour or so more, I’m all finished. I stretch again. I’m really proud of how they turned out. I pick one up and spin it by the end, careful not to touch the sticky, resin-coated grip. The weapon gives a satisfying whistle as it whirs through the air.

I smile as I prop them both against the side of the counter. Now, I just need to wait for the resin to set. I then work on putting the weapon making stuff away, making sure that the lid on the resin is on tight. I also eat the rest of the peaches and wash the empty jar in the sink before putting it back in the cabinet.

The broken jar with the molding stuff I put in the sink earlier, that I pick up carefully and take to the garden. I bury the stuff in a corner where I’m planning on putting my compost. Not the best solution, but I’m not sure where else to throw it out. I pick up the leftover jar and wash that too, not that I’ll really be able to use it for anything right now, but it wouldn’t hurt to keep it. I’m a big believer in recycling stuff even if it is broken.

By the time that I finish, I notice that I’m shivering. Oh dang, it’s gotten cold in here. My clothes aren’t quite dry yet either, so I don’t really want to put them back on yet. Instead, I work to restart the fire. It’ll help to dry the resin, warm up the place, and dry my clothes. Three birds with one bottle cap. No really, I’ve seen it. Well, not three birds at once, but this kid in my neighborhood could take down pigeons with bottle caps. What’s crazier is that he could hit a second one with the rebound about half the time. It wouldn’t kill them, but it made them confused as heck. They’d wander around looking absolutely drunk.

I flip my clothes around so their damp parts can dry easier. But, man, I’m all worn out. I let my arm disintegrate again as I sit by the fire to warm up a bit, rotating the scythes occasionally to dry on all sides. I was able to keep it up much longer this time.

In a much shorter time than I thought, the resin is hard. I’ll have to remember that it dries fast. I pick up the scythes and swing them both around a bit. Yup, I did a good job. They’re pretty comfortable to hold. Only I don’t want to be holding them the whole time. They’ll get in the way of pretty much anything I do that doesn’t involve fighting.

I pick up the ball of twine and some of the old cleaning rags I picked out of the drawer earlier. They’re leather, so they should work well. I fold one of the rags in half around the staff. Then I poke a row of holes down both the side where the edges meet and the side where the crease is. I grab another, stiffer rag and sew first rag diagonally onto this one using the holes I poked. The end result are two long loops of cloth that are tight enough to support the two scythes without them falling through. They’re not the typical ‘x’ shaped harness that you see in movies. Rather the harness will have the scythes in parallel lines poking out over my left shoulder once I get straps connected to the stiffer rag.

That goes a lot faster than the first part. All I do is attach two long pieces of twine to either side of the stiff rag like you see with those cheap drawstring backpacks. I tighten them while wearing the whole thing to make sure that the scythes fit snugly on my back. Then I tie them off. It’s a bit uncomfortable for my shoulders, so I make some thick shoulder pads using the remaining rags, threading the twine through them. That’s better.

Alright, I’m rested up enough. Time to go exploring. I slip on my clothes, tie my shoes, and slip on the harness for the scythes. It’s a little nerve racking, but I’m ready now. I take a deep breath and step outside.