《Deep Delve》Chapter Three
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Taking a deep breath, Kevin focused on the two options in front of him. As much as he would love to wander around in Explorer Mode, the hard truth was that he was being paid to create a dungeon. "Dungeon Mode," he stated confidently, only to gasp as his view pulled back to what might have been a couple of thousand feet up. Kevin clamped his eyes shut, fighting vertigo from the sudden perspective change.
Opening his eyes, Kevin took in the vista below. He could now clearly see the river that wound down from the mountains and through the hills before spilling into the sea. It appeared that mountain range rose from the ocean, and curled around plains as they faded to the forest on the far side of the river, before marching off into the distance. It was breathtaking in both its beauty and its scope. Kevin could see what appeared to be a cluster of buildings nestled up against the edge of the mountains where they met the sea, creating a protected cove or a bay of some sort.
Several minutes may have passed while Kevin drank it all in. He'd played many a VR game, but nothing came close to this in terms of scope. Finally, he started paying attention to the various light green bars that sat unobtrusively on the right-hand edge of his vision. As he focused on them, an interface swam into focus in front of him, which trumpeted in an excessively large and somehow... cheerful font "Welcome Dungeon Neophyte!".
Chuckling, Kevin mentally swiped the prompt away. 'Gotta love a game with snark,' he thought to himself, as a new window opened, with a lengthier message.
'Welcome to the Dungeon Creation Tool! You are one of the rare few, chosen to entertain, challenge, and guide the many adventurers who will make their way into our world. The team that has developed Deep Delve has spent a decade and the better part of a Trillion (with a T) dollars developing these tools. And now it falls to you, mighty Dungeon Developer, to ensure that this venture was not in vain.'
The world below Kevin suddenly illuminated as a grid was overlayed upon it. Slightly above his vision, a helpful scale appeared, indicating that one square was thirty feet to a side or nine hundred square feet in total. Now that he had a scale of measurement, he was able to see that the village seemed to consist of buildings that occupied between three and ten grids. As he panned his vision, getting an idea of where things were, Kevin was able to determine that the mouth of the river was a bit over a mile from the village, and the forest at its closest at the base of the mountains was just over two. A flashing prompt in the corner of his vision indicated "Select Grid for Dungeon Entrance."
Kevin considered his options. Clearly, players were going to start in the village. Equally clearly, he could install his Dungeon in the village proper. He had played many games where you began your adventure, clearing the cellar of the local inn from a vicious rat infestation, finding glory, copper coins, and in some of the mature games, the affections of the local barmaid. While it was tempting to follow that tried and true route, he felt that with the Dungeon being the primary focus of the game, that it wouldn't set the right tone to have the entrance in the village.
He kicked back, as he considered the world below him, not feeling at all like some sort of Pagan God, deciding where to visit his capricious wrath or bounty in accordance with his whims. "Alright," Kevin muttered as he considered the area "I have to assume there are going to be critters - Robert said there would be wildlife to get players to level five before they head into my Dungeon." 'The plains are out,' he thought 'both too close and too far, best leave that as the critter area as was likely intended.'
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Kevin glanced at the water and grimaced. Somewhere, somehow, someone was putting in an underwater Dungeon. He just knew it. "Wonder if I can take odds at the underwater Dungeons being the first ones to get closed down due to no delvers.." he said absentmindedly as his eyes traced the mountains up from the shore. While the peaks further inland were tall enough to have a treeline and snowcaps, the range that rose up from the ocean was merely covered with trees up to their modest peaks. Were it not for the jagged and rough nature, you might mistake the closest ones for rolling hills. It reminded him strongly of eastern Washington and western Idaho, and Kevin paused for a moment as he wondered if there would be seasons in the game.
Shaking his head and focusing back on his task, he decided that since the mountains were here, and most Dungeons required a lot of space, he would place his entrance about a third of a mile from the village, at the base one particularly steep peak. The mountain, while crowned with trees, revealed sheer rock and crags quite frequently as it ascended. A prompt appeared asking, "Place Dungeon Entrance here?" with a "Yes/No" option at the bottom of the window. Focusing on the option for yes, he was once again subject to vertigo as his perspective changed.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Julie groaned as she sank down into the overstuffed lazy-boy chair. It had taken the better part of three hours to finish the laundry, clean her room, and do a deep scrub down on the kitchen and the living room. She grudgingly acknowledged it would likely have taken much less time without the hangover she was sporting.
She wasn't in the greatest of moods. In addition to the verbal and emotional lashing Kevin had delivered, her phone had revealed two missed messages from her friend Jake. The first message had been a fairly normal post-party message, checking up on her and making sure she didn't need any help on the cleanup. Jake was an excellent guest when it came to that as she knew from experience. While he rarely stayed the night, he was always willing to come back over and help clean up the mess.
No, that wasn't the problem. The problem was that Jake had a crush on her, and had carried that torch for a couple of years now. He managed to stay out of the creep zone, but he made enough of an effort to make sure she knew about his continued interest to make it a little uncomfortable sometimes. And she had taken him to Kevin's bed and fucked him. The second message made that clear. Jake had asked her if everything was alright and wanted to make sure they were still cool. He'd also asked her out again.
Julie leaned back and kicked the chairs' footrest up. She did not need a lovesick Jake right now. Usually, she could take this kind of thing to Kevin, and he often had some insight into the male mind that could steer things the right way. Deciding to just yank the bandaid off, she pulled her phone out of her pocket and dialed up Jake. Hearing his cheerful voice, filled with hope, she ground her teeth and got on with the business of crushing his dreams on the cruel rocks of reality.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Melody slammed open her parent's front door, yelling into the house as she did, "Mom, I'm home!". She kicked off her shoes and slung her backpack off as she darted up the stairs to her room. Nudging her door open with a hip, she turned into her room, dumping her backpack in the chair by the door, the only purpose of which was to serve as a catchall. Grinning, Melody shimmied out of her clothes as she half staggered, half danced into her bathroom. A couple hours of work after a night of drunken partying and fucking had left her a bit ripe. 'Still,' she thought as she gave herself a brief once over in the mirror as the shower heated up, 'I don't have any bruises or hickeys.'
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Melody still lived with her parents, which was both a badge of shame and one of honor. On the shameful side, she had a degree in motorcycle repair and made more than enough money in the shop to afford her own place. Hell, the shop was where she had met Kevin. On the flip side, her father was in the final stages of ALS and required round the clock care, which she provided five nights and two days a week. Her Mom picked up the five days and two nights, allowing Melody to work part-time, and have a little bit of social life.
She smiled as she hopped in the shower. While she missed her dad being around and active, she'd known the ALS burden was coming, and she made the best of it. She had Kevin and Julie living a few houses down, and she could generally relax with them a couple of times a week. Julie was a blast, wild and carefree, she reminded Melody that there were still good times to be had, and she could still have fun despite her responsibilities. Kevin was more of a rock, no matter how bad the storm you could count him to stand firm and provide shelter. Or something. She wasn't great at metaphors.
Throwing on some gym shorts and a tank top, she flopped onto her bed, knowing she had to grab a couple hours before her shift with Dad started. Her mind was stubborn, though, and kept racing. She'd known Kevin a few months longer than she'd known Julie. He'd come in the week after she started at the shop, looking for some shims and bitching about how shim under bucket valves were bullshit. He had ordered the shims, and a few weeks later, when he came in, he started talking about the house he was buying. As fate would have it, it was the totally trashed house down the block. Things had grown from there.
Melody rolled over, giving her pillow a punch to soften it up. She loved her best friends, but their interpersonal relationship was super fucked up. Bleh. Deep Delve. She snuggled down. She'd hired a caretaker for two weeks so she could binge the game. Her Mom thought she was nuts for spending that much money to "Stay at home on a couch during her vacation", but Melody was beyond excited. "Gonna be fucking awesome bitches..." she muttered as she finally drifted off to sleep.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Kevin stared at the cutaway of the mountain. The interface was showing him a multilevel map of the mountain, allowing him to view, and based off the grid overlaying the whole thing, manipulate the entire space. Or most of it. It looked like he could thirty grids, which apparently cubes in this display, both up and down, which equated to almost one thousand feet vertically. It appeared he was constrained by the external dimensions of the mountains in regards to horizontal expansion, which seemed to be limited to about a ten cube diameter at the top.
Hesitantly he looked at his Dungeon Entrance and selected the nearest cube leading straight into the mountain. A new menu opened, prompting him to either "Clear Space" or "Leave current conditions." He chose "Clear Space" and was now presented with a thirty square foot cube of empty space. Selecting the cube, a row of options appeared on his right: Structure, substance, color, details, flora, and fauna all appeared, each one having an indicator of a submenu. Selecting structure, he gasped as a list of options began expanding across his screen. Kevin pulled back, closing the menus. "I'm going to need to give this some thought," he muttered to himself. 'Also, I need some sleep, it's been a long damn day,' he thought. Mentally pulling up the menu options, he hit log off and, after a few seconds, was greeted with blessed darkness and silence. Pulling his headset off, he flopped over onto his bed, his last thought 'Sleep now, build later.'
Waking up, Kevin stretched, his thoughts jumbled. His mind wasn't quite awake yet, but his body was used to running on autopilot, and he headed to his bathroom for a shit, shave, and a shower. About halfway through the shower, his mind caught up with his body, and he paused, shampoo dripping from his hair. "New job," he said quietly, not even audible over the showerhead of tormented souls. Upon speaking, he paused, briefly considering. Until yesterday, he was getting by. He made his mortgage payment, paid his bills on time, and didn't carry any other debt. He didn't, however, have much of a cushion, financially speaking. Hence the showerhead of tormented souls. The house was in great shape after his renovations, but he still hadn't replaced the water softener system, which performed poorly, and resulted in a significant mineral buildup. Which in this particular instance resulted in a showerhead that didn't release it's pressure evenly and created a sound not entirely unlike that of someone screaming as they were flayed alive. With the money from the new job, he could finish the few things he hadn't been able to during the renovation. No more soaking his showerhead in CLR every two months.
His mind went through a mental checklist of the remaining items on his renovation list. Kevin had initially planned to buy the house and then flip it. Then he discovered just how much rent he was going to pay now that he was out of his parents' house, and he had chosen to live in it instead. The original plan remained, though. Kevin had enjoyed the renovation work, bringing the home back from being a complete dump, to being one of the more elegant houses on the block. This new job could have the mortgage paid off within the year. He just had to build a Dungeon that people would want to visit. Something unique but accessible. Challenging but not punishing. He needed more information about the Deep Delve world. Toweling off, he slipped into a pair of shorts and grabbed his phone. Robert told him to act as if he was the only he could talk to about building the Dungeon, hadn't he? Grinning, Kevin dialed Robert's number.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Robert was doing his level best to absolutely destroy a Country Fried Steak Skillet at the Huddle House. Vacation meant, amongst other freedoms, the freedom to eat whatever the hell he wanted. And this morning, he wanted carbs and grease. He had paused to slather some more apple butter on a slice of toast when his phone rang. "Damn it," he said quietly as he set his toast down and started digging in the jacket next to him for his phone. "I'm on vacation, who the hell is calling -" he cut off as he saw Kevin's name. Sighing, he hit the green button, "What's up, Kevin?" Kevin's voice, unnaturally cheerful for a man who wasn't on vacation, replied: "Hey Robert, I was working up my Dungeon, and I realized that I have absolutely no information about Deep Delve, as like a world ya know?".
Robert grabbed his toast and took a bite before responding. "You got the packet from Glenda, right?" he replied with only a touch of sarcasm. While he hated being interrupted in the middle of his vacation, it was hard to be pissed at someone so friendly, and his breakfast had proven to be truly delicious. The sound of paper shuffling came through the phone before Kevin came back. "Erm, no, I don't have anything except tax forms and an employee handbook that I'm gonna use as a doorstop." Robert groaned. "Not hard copy you Luddite, she ought to have included credentials for you to log in to document repository." More silence. More paper shuffling. Then Kevin came back, "Sorry, Robert, but there aren't any papers relating to ... well ... anything about the job really, just tax stuff and what looks like eighty pages telling me how not sexually harass someone."
Robert couldn't help it, he laughed. "Ok, but you need to keep in mind that interrupting me during a motorcycle trip can be construed as sexual harassment." He could hear the change in Kevin's tone, and could easily imagine the young man grinning as Kevin replied: "It's not harassment, I'm just planning to steal your Victory away and have a torrid affair with it." Robert nodded to the waitress, who was refilling his water glass before continuing, "So, bike love aside, I can have Glenda get you access on Monday, but in the meantime, what do you need to know?" Kevin's voice hesitantly answered, "Kinda... everything? Races, creatures, history, just a general overview." Robert sighed and signaled for the check as he crammed the last bite of toast into his mouth. "This is going to take a while."
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Kevin listened as Robert began, "Alright, so first things first, the premise behind the game. The various races of the world, which are Humans, elves, dwarves, and the animal aspect races, where you have your catgirls and dog men." Kevin coughed a bit, trying to conceal a chuckle as Robert continued on with a sigh. "Yes, well, there are a lot of people who like to play animal aspect ratios. The studio doesn't judge. I do, but the studio doesn't. Moving on. All the players, regardless of race, are refugees fleeing the main continent, and have been shipwrecked on these fair shores."
Kevin raised an eyebrow. The shipwrecked bit wasn't a new trope, but the refugee thing hadn't been done that terribly often. "So, what exactly went wrong on the main continent that all these people had to flee?" he asked. "Well, that goes into the dungeon aspect of the game," Robert replied, "you'll eventually learn that the entire economy is based off delving dungeons. And back home, the dungeons went insane and started spitting out monsters that were ravaging the countryside, all the while the monsters inside jumped to impossibly high levels." Robert was really getting into his subject, Kevin noted, as he enthusiastically went on. "So, with the economy tanked, the countryside no longer safe and the dungeons wreaking havoc, the leaders of the various races banded together and loaded all their non-combatants into whatever ships they had, and sent them across the ocean in search of a safe place."
"So," Kevin said, "everyone is homeless, starting over, with the looming threat of what is left behind?". "Exactly right," Robert said happily, "we have a ten minute cinematic that you get after character creation, you gonna fuckin' love it." Kevin grinned, thinking how psyched Mel was going to be. "Yeah, I can think of at least one of my friends who is gonna watch it over and over, she's absolutely nuts for that shit." Robert replied, "Yeah, it's fucking awesome. Anyways, everyone washes up on shore by the village, and after they get their shit together, they have to Delve the Dungeon."
Kevin gave an unseen nod, "Ok, so historically speaking, what were the dungeons on the mainland like?". Robert replied, "Everything, man, there were elemental themed dungeons, werewolf dungeons, spider dungeons, you name it." Kevin gave a slow nod. "Ok," he said, "So wide open on the critters I stick in it - you pretty much implied that delving was the basis for the economy. I'm looking for a bit more on that." "Alright," said Robert "here is the skinny. Monsters drop experience shards or crystals. You need to use these crystals to level up, to craft items, etc." Kevin tilted his head. While not a unique concept, it wasn't wildly popular. Robert continued on, "Now what is important to know is the fact that Dungeons are inherently magical, as evidenced by the instancing, and the respawning of monsters. We don't try to hide it or handwave it, we explain it as part of the game lore." Robert took an audible breath and continued, "Outdoors, plants and animals follow a normal cycle of growth. Cattle take ten months to go from conception to birth. Grain takes a season to grow and be harvested." Kevin waited as Robert went on, "Obviously Dungeons respawn, and are instanced. Now here is the kicker. Those crystals? You can also use them to accelerate the growth of crops and livestock. Hell, you can use them to accelerate the gestation period of humans too, if you are of a mind to."
"Ok..." Kevin thought as Robert was clearly waiting for a response. "So crystals are everything." Robert replied, "Yep, the entire economy. As you can imagine, they make it possible for an entire society to exist on a relatively small piece of land, due to being able to accelerate food production." Kevin gave another imperceptible nod. This was different. "Alright, I'm wrapping my head around this, so my Dungeon is gonna be the end all be all for fucking everything on my server," he said. "Now you're getting it!" said Robert. "Fuck me," Kevin muttered as he considered the scope of the Dungeon's importance. Robert laughed and replied, "Pretty sure that falls under that eighty pages of sexual harassment you're using as a doorstop." Kevin gave a chuckle of his own. "So, that should get you started, if you've got anything else, think real hard on if can't wait till you get the info on Monday," Robert said, "I've got a good seven hundred miles planned for today, so go build your Dungeon and let me enjoy it." Kevin replied, "Shiny side up, brother, enjoy the ride" and disconnected the call. Time to get to work.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Julie woke up feeling hopeful. It was a brand new day, she wasn't hungover her house was clean, and hopefully, Kev would be in a better mood and maybe willing to talk to her. Hopping out of bed, she headed for the bathroom for her morning ritual. Twenty minutes later, freshly scrubbed and feeling optimistic, she knocked on Kevin's door twice, before turning the doorknob and sticking her head around the door. Kevin was sitting at his desk with a slab of grid paper, sketching something out. "Come in, pull up a seat," he called to her. Julie happily bounced into the room, glad that he hadn't thus far put a lock on his door, and sat on crosslegged on his beds eyeballing her friend trying to get a sense of his mood. Kevin set his pencil and... was that a protractor??? down on the desk and swiveled his chair to face her.
She took a deep breath and stared straight into Kevin's eyes as she said, "I'm incredibly sorry about yesterday. I fucked up, and it won't happen again. Can we be cool again?" Kevin blew out a breath and shot her a grin as he replied, "I can't stay mad at you babe, even if you drive me nuts sometimes. Just don't let it happen again, right?" Julie nodded rapidly as she bounded up off the bad and tackled him, knocking over his chair as she delivered something between a hug and an unsportsmanlike conduct tackle. "Dude!" Kevin half laughed, half groaned from underneath her, "I'm gonna start slipping Xanax in your damn cereal." Julie disengaged herself and hopped back up on the bed. "Nah, you love me too much for that," she responded with a grin. Kevin's only response was a grunt as he righted his chair and sat back down.
"So," she went on when it was clear she wasn't getting more than a grunt, "I vaguely remember you saying you got a new job! Are you done with the Evil Empire?". Kevin dropped his head into his hands and gave her another groan. "Awww, come on! I've been waiting forever for you to get a new gig! Mel is gonna be off the chain!" she went on. Julie knew that while Kev had been good at his Wal-Mart job, and had been comfortable, he wasn't really happy there. Kevin lifted his head, his expression set in mock horror "Dude," he said, "You can't tell Mel yet, she'll ...I don't know. But it'll be way over the top and more than I need right now." She grinned at her then threw her hands up in quotation marks, "Tiny, but fierce!". Kevin gave her a grin and double thumbs-up, "Damn straight."
"Tell me!" Julie demanded as she bounced on the bed, unable to sit still. It looked like Kevin was really going to forgive her, and she wanted to share the happiness of his new job, whatever it was. Kevin frowned and said haltingly, "Well, first, you gotta understand that I'm under a serious NDA. I mean, like fucking DARPA serious." She blinked. She looked at Kev. He looked serious. "Dude," she said slowly, "are we like, building new nuclear silos or some shit?" Kevin laughed at her, shaking his head, "No, nothing like that," he continued, becoming serious, "I am, in fact, working for New Realities." Julie gasped and stood up as she exclaimed, "Dude, no way! Deep Delve?" Kevin nodded his head, looking solemn and said, "Yep. I can't tell you exactly what they have me doing, as that would be breaking the NDA, but I can tell you that if it works out, I'll be making a good chunk more than I was as a pallet jockey". She considered him for a moment before saying, "Yeah, Mel is gonna flip her shit." Kevin just sighed and shook his head.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
A few blocks away, Melody rolled over and kept sleeping, unaware of the bombshell that been dropped so very close by.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Kevin shooed Julie out of his room, claiming he needed to get to work. Which was entirely truthful, if not the entire truth. He needed to keep a good headspace. Looking down at his graph paper, he tore off the sheet and balled it up before tossing it in his wastebasket. He needed something... special. Something inspiring. He had been working on a layout for a dungeon and had designed about a dozen tunnels or passages before he got frustrated. He knew in his heart that fucking everyone was going to have some sort of tunnel or passageway system. And he needed to not be everyone. He turned on his monitor and fired up Google. He typed in "cavern" and switched it to images. Scrolling down, he paused when he saw an image of a waterfall and a forest. Clicking on it, he read about a cavern that was found in Vietnam that had a river, trees, and even a microclimate. He sat back in his chair and thought for a minute. What were the limitations of the developers' tools? Could he carve out a huge cavern, leaving it open at the top? "Fuck it," he said to himself as he turned to his graph paper and sketched out the limitations of the mountain, "might as well try."
Four hours later, he sat back and considered his graph paper. He had done the math and had decided he needed to cut his mountain down to size, in order to enlarge the opening at the top of the cavern. Hopefully, the tools would allow him to do so. His plan was to have an opening across the top of about three thousand feet wide. He planned for it to be about three hundred feet deep, which would allow for some of the trees to appear over the edge of the cavern, as he had decided to use Redwoods. He had some pretty good memories of riding his bike out west and visiting the Redwood national forest. So, three thousand feet at the top, and double that at the bottom. Should make for an interesting Dungeon concept. He had mapped an underground river that would appear as a short waterfall, and then meander the width of the cavern. He wasn't quite sure what he wanted to do for critters just yet, but he was leaning towards animals, maybe super-sized and super aggressive. "But," he sighed as stuffed the map in a desk drawer and stood up to move over to his couch and VR helmet. "Now I have to figure out how to make it happen in game with the tools," he finished his thought aloud as he lay down on the couch and fired up the headset.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Melody woke up with a start. She blinked blearily. Huh. Weird dream. Kev dream. Those were always weird. They were riding their bikes, except they were their bikes. She shook herself and sat up. Glancing at her phone, she saw a text from Julie waiting. "Kev got new job, u gonna flip." Melody shot out of bed and scrambled for pants. Shoving her pants on and grabbing a t-shirt, she yanked off her tank top and stuffed her head through the t-shirt as she hurtled down the stairs, where she paused only to slip on her sneakers before bolting out the door and flat out running to Kevin and Julie's.
Pausing to catch her breath, she then swung open the door with a mighty roar of "Where my bitches at!" She closed the door behind her as she headed down the hallway to Julie's room, figuring she could get the lay of the land from her first. Plus Kev might still be a bit sore about the cum puddle on his bed. Julie had her door open and was grinning at Melody as she rushed into her room and flung herself on the bed. As Julie closed the door and turned around, Melody said: "So, what is the good word on our boy?" Julie sat down next to her on the bed and said with a serious look, "I can tell you, but you have to promise not to flip your shit." Melody nodded and replied, "My shit shall remain unflipped. What gig did he land that he's finally gonna quit working for Satan?" Julie grinned and reached out to take ahold of her friend's hands. Melody quirked an eyebrow, and waited for her to deliver the news. Julie grinned and said, "New Realities. He can't say what he's doing because of an NDA, but it has something to do with Deep Delve." Melody looked her friend in the eyes, looking for any sign of joking or duplicity. Finding none, she took a deep breath, then let it out. She then took another. Then she flipped her shit. "Are you fucking kidding me, Kev is working on Deep Delve?!?!" she yelled with sufficient volume to cause Julie to wince. Yanking her hands back, she sprang out the door and started pounding on Kevin's door. It really wasn't her fault, she reflected as she pounded away, how could Julie tell her this news and expect her to not flip her shit?
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Healing Dungeon
// DUNGEON Mechanics will start to appear around chapter 100+/Arc 3 of the story! \ Avan, a 25-year-old young man, is torn from his rather boring life. He awakens in Aorus, a world full of magic, monsters and dungeons. By a stroke of luck and an ominous skill called "Potential", he awakens a new class never seen before called Dungeonheart (Human). Dungeons, although sentient, are never sapient nor mobile. Join Avan as he pursues his passion for healing and martial arts, and building his very own dungeon at the same time. He’s the hybrid of a moving dungeon and a healer. "Healing Dungeon" will include City building, strategy, very little romance, exploration of the world of Aorus, and a touch of power levelling. (There are elements from other fantasy novels, as well as anime, games, and more). What will all be possible with a dungeon that can move, but still brings some of the familiar dungeon mechanics along for its journey? -- Please note that the beginning and thus the first chapters were really my first writing works in english, and can only be rewritten at a later time (lack of time in favor for new chapters) --(The writing style and also the story improves VERY much from the 12th chapter at the latest! Proofreading is available, but I depend on any well-intentioned advice from you guys). If you have any questions, suggestions, constructive criticism, or just because you feel like it, feel free to leave me a comment below the respective chapters!For every positive and serious review or rating, I am infinitely grateful! ;) I am a creature of few words and the beginning is therefore a little faster than I would have liked it now in retrospect. Please do not expect huge paraphrases and descriptions of the environments, but only what is really necessary to get into the scene. Cheers and hopefully see you in the comment section.
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