《Welcome to the Upward Bound System, V.2》Revision notice, (NOT another do over), Non chapter

Advertisement

Hi everyone hope the new year is treating you all well so far.

As you all have read, this is about a revision of some of the earlier chapter's content.

I want to improve the descriptions in the earlier chapters to help the story be more acceptable. Some have made comments that Dante in the earlier chapters is Dull and without any real personality. Unfortunately...

...I believe them.

I hope that all of you who love and enjoy the story won't be too made about the delay this will cause.

I also hope that you guys will point out parts of the story that you have issue with. I'm thinking I'm going to have to edit the scenes where Dante and his dad are in Brothel Alley. How would you guys like to see that part changed? I would prefer to keep it more or less the same. Dante and his dad together at meeting Oscar.

I will directly quote one of the readers in their comments about the story.

"The characters are just really dull. Dante is given the most screen time but I can honestly think of no words to describe his personality or character. Other than 'Generic' is a normal dude with normal morals and normal views. He doesn't seem to have any stresses or conflicts to his character or anything that would require growth to change. He doesn't even seem particularly ambitious or curious, character traits that can pull a lot of weight in am otherwise normal character. Maybe that works for some people, but not me."

These are among the issues that I feel need to be fixed to draw in more people and make a more interesting story for you all. But there must be a balance.

To directly quote what my brother said about the issue.

Advertisement

He stopped at two from the sounds of it if you'd actually look at what he's said

And he's right to man

And sometimes you give Dante these emotional mood swings that make little sense. ELABORATE, SAY MORE THAN "Lol he's crying"

He tries to heal a cat and cries when he fails, that's understandable. But you need to make it so the people reading the story also feel that. Idk, maybe you describe the feeling of watching this poor gutted cat's look of hope or resignation. You stretch moments out so it can be felt. DO SOMETHING"

There is also the problem of having to make minor correction to some errors that no one but my brother seems to have found. Not with the blue boxes, but it's an issue with one of the Headmaster's lines.

I do need to improve how Dante shows his emotion among several other things. I thank you all for your comments. Again if any of you have suggestions for this revision please feel free to either leave them in the comments below this notice chapter or beneath the chapter you would wish to see be updated.

Thank you all for reading the story and to let you all know the story has climbed past the 4000's in rank and has reached the 3000's. Thank you all! I couldn't have done it without you guys!

    people are reading<Welcome to the Upward Bound System, V.2>
      Close message
      Advertisement
      Next Chap
      You may like
      You can access <East Tale> through any of the following apps you have installed
      5800Coins for Signup,580 Coins daily.
      Update the hottest novels in time! Subscribe to push to read! Accurate recommendation from massive library!
      2 Then Click【Add To Home Screen】
      1Click