Chapter 4

3 months later

Raiel stood, well rested after a long night's sleep.

Ever since he'd been imprisoned, he'd done his best to keep his body healthy, doing whatever it told him. Sleeping when he was tired, and then until he felt full of vigor; eating and drinking when he felt hungry and thirsty. He'd never lived like this, not having to worry about looming threats. And no reason to bother worrying, when he already found himself in the midst of enemies.

He walked over to the small, barred window, falling into his daily routine as an observer, listening and watching the living city. When he concentrated on his ears, the voices and sounds from the market outside amplified and cleared, allowing him to pick up individual conversations. He could do the same with his eyes, but it was significantly more difficult.

Tali had visited him a number of times, each time growing gradually more agitated, when he continuously refused to speak. She'd even beaten him several times with a polished, wooden baton which had become her favorite tool for interrogation.

His face, arms, and torso bore evidence of the harsh conversations she held, but it didn't bother him much anymore. After having reconciled himself to the fact, that there was no way around it, he'd begun to somehow tune it out. The pain was still very real, however, he simply found himself more and more able to bear it.

He had discovered this during one of the sessions with Tali. She’d struck him in the face, after which he had found himself on the brink of consciousness.

One way or the other, he was thrown into a strange state of lucidity. At first, he had thought he was dying. It had occurred to Raiel how very peaceful he felt, despite being fully aware of the physical chaos he was experiencing.

If this was how it was, he thought, it honestly wasn’t that bad. The agony was still raging in his body, but it was as if he had grown a second mind. One, which was separate from his head. When he focused with this mind – focused on his thoughts – the pain became just a little less significant.

On various occasions since then, he had, to no avail, attempted to enter the same state of clarity. Both alone on the floor in his cell, and while Tali brutally tried to force answers out of him, he had tried. It had not yet succeeded to a degree anywhere near the first time.

The best he could achieve deliberately was something like his meditative state, which certainly did help. It just wasn’t enough.

Along the way, he had realized, that he wanted it for more than just pain relief. He wanted it for the power it offered – the control over his own body. He craved that power in the restricted life, in which he found himself.

To Raiel, the most logical conclusion for the one occurrence was, that it was a form of coping mechanism for the extreme physical stress he was the victim of. And as such, he wasn’t eager to recreate the experience. He’d just have to find another way around to it.

What's more, he figured, that what she had shown so far, was not the worst she had to give. Yet, he still was not afraid.

He had a plan. He’d endured it all for this day.

He’d spent almost four months worrying about the fate of the pup, and the time to learn of its fate had come. He felt ready now and would, for the first time, allow Tali to hear his voice.

He walked up to his cell door, and called out to Komren. Komren had treated him well, providing food and drink with regular intervals, never starving him, and Raiel was almost certain that he'd been doing so against Tali's orders, making him that much more likable.

Komren walked slowly to the door with the lazy, dragged steps of a tired, overworked man. As Raiel had grown weaker as the weeks went by, so had Komren. Raiel knew, that the old warden blamed himself for not being able to do anything for the boy.

“Lad,” he said, droopy eyes looking at Raiel through the small opening in the door, “What can I do for you?”

Until now, Raiel had never shown the real progress, he had made with the language. Even Komren had only heard sentences of three to four words from him. This time he would drag Tali here himself, be in control of the situation, and make her give him some answers to his questions.

“Komren. I'm thirsty, would you bring me a cup of water? Oh, and call Battle Chief Tali here, too, please.”

Komren stared through the opening, suddenly awake. For a moment, he simply said nothing.

“You… you’re…” stammered Komren, putting his hands on the door.

“Better?” Raiel guessed with an amused smile. “Thank you, Komren. I’ve been practicing. The books really helped too.” He added cheerfully, trying to hide his nervousness. He didn’t mention his meditation or how most of his linguistic improvement had been thanks to that.

“Yes… Better…” Komren lingered for a moment, eyes distant in contemplative thought, as if he couldn’t quite connect the boy he’d known and taught to the one now presenting himself before him. Then he snapped out of his daze and focused once again on Raiel.

“Are you sure about this?” Komren asked carefully, “It’s just so… sudden. I thought you’d been waiting for something, but after all this time, I was starting to doubt it.” He said uncertainly.

“Well, you were right. I was waiting for something. But I think it’s about time now.” Raiel replied with faked confidence.

Komren seemed very unnerved by the situation. “Y- yeah, of course, lad. I'll send for her right away!” he exclaimed as he turned and scrambled off towards the sink, filling a cup with water, which he handed to Raiel before leaving to deliver the message. Raiel thought he heard Komren mutter nervously to himself.

As he drank deeply from the cup, Raiel couldn't help but smile. Now, that he knew he would speak with Tali, he could finally discuss his future, and he would see the pup again, his first friend in life. He just hoped she would actually listen. Perhaps, she wasn’t even interested in his purpose anymore.

He’d long ago come to the conclusion, that she probably knew from the start, that he wasn’t anyone special. Frankly, his appearance when he walked into the city on that day had been neither inconspicuous or even acceptable by societal standards. At this point, she might just crave an explanation for his existence. A reason why he’s there. A reason why he’s like he is.

He sniffed his arm pits. They reeked, which was not good since body odor was one of many trivialities that he had found apparently played a large part in how people perceived others.

True, this society was enormously advanced, but that had also made its people pay attention to things that, in his opinion, could not possibly be more unimportant. They had only given him a change of clothes once since he'd arrived, and he had bathed about once a week, washing himself in cold, but refreshing water.

Weeks. Another peculiar detail about this modern society was how important every second of their life seemed to be to them, to the point where they would become upset over a few lost minutes in their busy schedules. They measured everything, going to great lengths to speed up every process, doing everything faster and more efficiently, even neglecting basic necessities like eating and sleeping, just to cram in more waking hours in one day.

To him, it felt like the price they had paid for their technological advancement was far too high in comparison to what they'd gotten in return. Their lives seemed to be spent meaninglessly keeping up with trends.

Battle Chief Tali didn't make him wait long, and it could not have been more than half an hour since he'd contacted Komren and asked him to fetch her. Tali wore her usual outfit: black and green uniform, knee boots, hair in a tail, and the long, slender spear that she'd brought with her every day. She exuded an energy of shivering excitement, but she hid it well under a stern gaze and a mouth set in a tight line.

“So, I hear you're ready to speak with me.”

“Yes, Battle Chief Tali. I think it is time. But that's not all. You will tell me what I want to know in return for that information.” Said Raiel, coming to stand in front of Tali.

Her eyebrows shot up in mild, hidden surprise, “We'll see about that, won't we?” She said as she rested her hand on her spear. Raiel regarded her with a calm gaze, showing his disinterest in her threats.

“Ask your questions Battle Chief, and I will answer if I can.”

“Fine, let's start out easy, then. Where did you come from? And don't try to lie to me, I've been doing this long enough to see through them.”

Raiel flashed her a little smile, “I wouldn't dream of it. Well, to make a long story short, I've spent my entire life alone, in the forest right outside your city. Before I wandered in here, I stumbled out in the open by accident. So, you'd understand my confusion and inability to speak your tongue, now that you know that you're the first humans I've ever seen... not as successful an encounter as I'd hoped.” he added, glaring at her.

Tali raised an eyebrow and sneered at him, “You seriously think I'd fall for that?” she asked mockingly. “No, there are too many irregularities in your story. First off: how could you have survived so long alone? You’re practically a child. What are you, twelve? Realistically, you could not have lived as a child. Second: how could you possibly have learned our language to that degree in a mere four months? It should have taken you at least a year or two, especially if you had no base language to start with.” She counted the reasons on her fingers methodically as she rattled them off, to emphasize her point.

“You might not to believe me. That is up to you. But I swear to you that it is the truth.” he said, a sincerity coming over him.

But then his anger grew, the feeling of helplessness suddenly washing over him once more. “Now, you will answer me. Where is the pup I brought with me, when I came here? I trust you've looked after it and tended to its needs. Tell me, did it survive its injuries? I didn't know what was wrong. . . It had some kind of internal damage, maybe, I'm not sure-,”

“Calm down, you're embarrassing yourself. Your animal is fine. Though, I wouldn't call her a pup anymore. We’ll see what happens from now on.” She shrugged and turned her back to him.

He suddenly felt light, as if his body had been filled with water the past months, and was now emptied completely.

“Oh, thank you!” said Raiel and walked to her, putting a hand on her shoulder, but she shook his hand off, turning to him, hostile again.

“What were your intentions in coming here?”

“Can't you figure that out from what I've already told you about me?” He chuckled humorlessly.

“I’m nobody. I don’t have an identity. I wandered out of the forest, not knowing where I was, when I saw a caravan of human travelers. You can imagine how stunned I was, finding out that I wasn't the only one of my kind, after all.” he said, a pleasant smile touching his lips. “I was both afraid and ecstatic to find out, and it wasn't easy to decide whether to follow the caravan or not, but in the end, I did, hoping for the best.” He recalled that day with something akin to nostalgia. “Now I'm not so sure I should have. I just wanted to be part of something. You must understand that, don't you, Battle Chief Tali?”

“So you say, but why should I believe you?” Tali glared at him, suspicion evident in her eyes. Her cudgel still hung in her belt, reminding Raiel of the consequences of her anger.

“I've no proof to support my claims, and again, you've no reason to believe me, but it's the truth. Is there no way you'll give me a chance to prove myself to you?”

Tali sized him up with scrutiny, a cunning smirk sneaking onto her smooth face, “Hm. You say you've lived your whole life in the wild, so you'd be a decent hunter, isn't that right?”

“I've no standards to compare to, but I survived.” said Raiel. He stood straight and looked intently at her, a sense of pride taking hold of him.

“Then you can hunt for us. I'll send someone to fetch you in the morning.” said Tali.

She turned and walked to the door, but hesitated and looked back at him, “Come to think of it, where did you get the coat you wore when you came here?” she asked.

“Uh, well, I met a man on the way here. A big, fat man. The coat was his. He was scared of me, and when he tried to run off, I grabbed him, but only the coat stayed. Looking back, I can see why he’d rather avoid me.” Raiel said, laughing. “I didn't mean to scare him, but I couldn't understand his words, and he yelled at me. Still don't know who he is, and I probably won't see him again, so it's all in the past now.”

“You talk a lot. And you’re a little too shrewd for a twelve-year old, if you ask me.”

“Yes, well, excuse my running mouth. It’s all very new and exciting for me.” he smiled, pointedly ignoring her last comment.

“Someone will come for you tomorrow, so be ready. I expect an expert job, if you want to stay on my good side. And don’t even think about trying anything.” She walked out, hair swinging with each step. There was something about her that he couldn't explain. She emitted a pressure unlike any of the other people.

After Tali left, Raiel sat back down on his cot. An incredible sense of relief overcame him as he released a breath he felt like he’d been holding since he arrived. He honestly hadn’t been expecting to come this far, but was grateful for the chance, nonetheless.

Still, the way in which Tali had so readily agreed to a deal was more than a little suspicious. There wasn’t much he could do about that, however. He had no control in this place, and anything seemed better than spending day after day in a cell with the occasional beating.

It was not easy to decide if she had believed his story either. He had to admit, that it really was quite the unlikely origin.

It hadn’t really occurred to him before his captivity, that it definitely didn’t make any sense for him to have survived alone. He would have been a baby at some point. It simply couldn’t be.

A sort of blackness seemed to seep into his mind whenever he tried to recall his distant past. Like tar being poured over his eyes, or day rapidly turning to the blackest night. It hadn’t bothered him much before, but as he became more and more aware of himself, he had begun to realize that his life was odd, to say the least.

He was not just a straggler, who didn’t fit in. There was more to it. But for the life of him, he couldn’t remember.

A quiet voice interrupted his thinking time.

“Lad, how did it go?” Komren asked him hesitatingly.

When Raiel caught Komren’s eyes he could not help but flash him a wide grin.

“It went well, actually.” Raiel revealed, “She agreed to let me out of here if I help the city with its hunting.” Raiel’s giddy attitude seemed to cause Komren to worry even more than he already did. He looked at the boy like he couldn’t decide what to say to him.

“Do you realize, that this is likely a ploy? There’s always something behind her actions, Raiel!”

Raiel eyed Komren apologetically, but shot him the most reassuring smile he could. “I know, Komren. But I don’t have a real choice here.” He said, “My only friend is out there, somewhere, and this might be my only chance.” He took Komren’s hand in his own, trying to calm the old man, who had cared so much for him. “You are so kind for worrying about me, but this is something I must do. I promise this will not be the last you see of me.” Raiel reassured him brightly.

“I am glad to hear it, then.” Komren told him as he squeezed Raiel’s hand. “And when you said your only friend was missing, you weren’t quite correct. I’m here, too, as your friend.” He added and embraced the weary boy, catching Raiel so completely off guard, that he jerked in shock. Slowly, as he regained his composure, he put his arms around the old warden’s back and laid his head on his shoulder. Before he knew it, tears welled in the corners of his eyes, promising to run down his cheeks if he didn’t wipe his eyes.

When they separated, Komren asked to see the two books he’d lent to Raiel. Raiel quickly retrieved them from under his blanket and handed them over, thanking the man sincerely.

Komren studied the books for a while before he said anything, “You know, my son won’t need these anymore, so I’d be happy, if you would hold on to them.” He kept looking at the books, even as he spoke, and his eyes seemed to behold a distant memory. One that was lost. A time he could not return to.

Raiel silently accepted the books once more, only mouthing his thanks. He didn’t feel like it would be appropriate to speak to Komren when he was so absorbed in thought, so he simply sat and waited. He did not mind it.

They sat together quietly for a while, but Komren had other matters to attend to, and couldn’t stay longer. Before he left, he asked Raiel if he still had the wooden coin. Raiel took it out of his pocket and proudly presented it to the old man. Komren smiled warmly, patted the boy’s shoulder and left.

Afterwards, Raiel undressed and sat down on the stone floor. When he was alone, he had found he preferred not wearing all those restricting clothes. Sometimes when he wore it, he scratched his own itchy skin so much that it turned an angry red, and besides, his body temperature without clothes felt the most perfect for him. Neither too cold or too hot. When Tali or Komren showed up, he would always put something on. In Komren’s case, it was because he didn’t want the old man to feel uncomfortable in his presence, and with Tali, because he thought, since he already was on her bad side, there was no reason to make it worse.

As he fell into his usual trance, he tried to prepare his mind and body for the day to come. Lately, his daily life had become so static, that he almost feared the change tomorrow would bring. It was not that he regretted accepting Tali’s proposal, but his stomach still turned when he thought about all the things that could go wrong.

He spent the day calming himself with varying success. Anything he could think of to distract himself, he did. He did muscle training, read his picture book again for the hundredth time, and literally jumped around his cell, even bumping his head on the ceiling once.

His dinner arriving was announced by the cell door being unlocked and kicked open by a bored warden. When Komren wasn’t on duty, Raiel always kept his voice to himself. The three other wardens who worked there showed no interest in the boy, and thus, he showed no interest in them either. In any case, if all went well, starting tomorrow he would never have to endure their dull company again. The warden shot Raiel’s nakedness a look of complete repulsion, as he placed the tray of food on the floor by the door, quickly leaving the wretched boy to himself.

The food was as unremarkable as the company, with a small loaf of bread to help get down a porridge that rated somewhere between sand and spoiled milk, both of which he was willing to bet were the main ingredients. He got a cup of water as well, which he cleverly saved for last, so he could wash down the taste.

Dinner over with, he went to bed as the sun set on the horizon, once again left to his thoughts. Being imprisoned had been immensely boring, and as he drifted off to sleep, whether the new day would bring fortune or misfortune, he welcomed it.