《Poisoned Chalice》Chapter Seven - The God of Earth

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Hands flipped me over on my back roughly. A rustle to the right told me that Shangtian was being searched too. Against the blinding sunlight, I could dimly make out three men with bulging muscles. Swords brandishing, they glared at me as if I killed their mothers. Shangtian was so lucky she was still out.

“Entry into Shenjie is illegal unless through designated gateways,” boomed menacing guard number one.

“Is it?” I smiled, since a smile was the universal sign of friendliness.

“Look at her, cheeky and insolent. I’ll wager she is up to no good,” said menacing guard number two in a not so low voice.

I dropped my smile at once.

“Her face flips faster than the pages of a book, definitely up to no good,” said menacing guard number three.

“Sirs, we are candidates for the Celestial Trials,” I said exasperatedly. “Our crane had a mishap and dropped us mid-flight. Can you show us where to go to complete the trials?” I asked.

They frowned.

“All candidates who passed have already begun—”

“We have to hurry then!” I exclaimed, leaping up.

“Not so fast,” ordered menacing guard number one. He poked me back down with the tip of his shiny sword. “You two are mortals. How did you cast a stairway to Shenjie, which is also illegal by the way?”

“Our crane was angry because it got a two for one deal. It threw us off midflight, where we met three men fighting over butterflies. They made this stairway for us. I climbed up with my two feet and was welcomed by you three,” I replied in one breath.

They exchanged startled glances.

“Where are the butterflies?” Menacing guard number one demanded.

I tried to remember but could only see the bloody arm in my mind. I shook my head, hoping it wouldn’t be a problem.

It was, because six eyeballs bulged at me.

“Mojie sent them to tease us.” Menacing guard number three said, disbelief etched in his face.

I did a double-take. I had been called a fruity-ass, a hornet’s nest, an oddball, but a tease?

“Definitely. And they are female. You know Chila favors female attendants.”

Chila? Who was Chila?

“Now that I think about it, mortals are little weak things. How could they have possibly climbed here?”

I flexed the answer to their question, but they didn’t look at my muscular calves.

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“Let’s report them to the Surveillance Commissioners of the Bureau of Mortal Affairs.”

“And submit a memorial to the Grand Counselor of the North Pole—”

“Maybe consult the Principal Academician and the Head of the Censorate as well—”

“Don’t forget the Defender-in-Chief—”

That was when I decided to swing Shangtian across my back again and make a run for it. By the time they finished their reporting, submission, and consulting, the Celestial Trials would be over. I didn’t climb my ass up here for nothing.

Clouds, sparkling white with soft swirls, whipped by gentle wind, sprawled in all directions. My feet stirred them like chopsticks beating egg-whites. Paths, foliage, hills, palaces… so this was the world of the gods! I had never seen such beauty, but I didn’t have time to marvel.

Thunderous bellows of “stop” followed me as I fled. Turn left, turn right, behind that rock, right again… I moved until I could no longer hear them. Then I stopped to breath.

“Look at the dirt on their dresses!”

“Is that sweat on her forehead? Gross!”

A giant cloud drifted overhead carrying a group of elaborately dressed ladies. They giggled as they passed. I felt color flood into my face.

“Want a whiff?” I retorted.

They screamed like a flock of geese as I took a step forward. One even tripped dramatically as their cloud zoomed away.

“Shangtian… Shangtian!” I hissed when we were alone again. She would know where to go.

Shangtian groaned but didn’t wake up.

I reached back to shake her, but her skin felt cold and clammy. She had heat sickness, I realized.

I plunged into the nearest bamboo grove. The towering bamboos hid us from the blazing sun, but the chilling shade made me tense. I had no idea where I was.

Then, slowly but surely, the strangest feeling came over me. I turned left, knowing, for some reason, that this was the right way. The ground became choked with moss and roots. I trod on the undergrowth, following the winding of a stream. I didn’t know where I was headed, but my instincts told me the direction.

Then I came upon a moon gate. I would have missed it, for it was partially hidden by vines and branches that grew wild and uncontrolled. I walked towards the gate, enchanted, and lifted the mass of vines.

“Wow,” I exclaimed out loud. Clusters of wisteria dangled gently in the breeze, contrasting with canopies of green willow. Groves of peonies bloomed vibrantly. Giant flowers, pink, red, purple, gold, drooped their lovely heads. This was someone’s garden, I realized, and it reminded me of my village.

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I blinked away the prick of tears in my eyes and laid Shangtian on the grass, collapsing next to her. My first glimpse of Shenjie was not what I imagined. As I remembered the distrust on the faces of the marshals and the disgust from the flying women, anger rose inside me. Like I wanted to be here! My village was a million times better and I wouldn’t be here if someone didn’t annihilate it! I was leaving this unwelcoming pigsty as soon as I found the culprit and saved the villagers souls, I decided.

I rolled over to check on Shangtian. The moment I saw her, all thoughts fled my mind. Her lips were parched and her face was pale but glistening with sweat—all signs of something with heat sickness.

I scooped some water from the nearby stream and lifted my hand to her mouth. She drank some but sputtered out about half. Plain cold water was going to make her sick. She needed a drink, quick.

I snatched a gourd from the vines and stuffed petals of tree peonies, water lilies, a lotus, and white plums inside. Then I plunged it into the stream until it was heavy with water. As I lifted the nozzle of the gourd to Shangtian’s lips, I prayed that she would like my concoction and drink as much as possible.

Pop!

Something rose from the ground. It was short man with a long staff.

I dropped the gourd in shock. It flew to the man instead of landing on the ground. He tipped it to his mouth. His throat moved up and down as he chugged.

“I’ve never had anything so delicious!” He exclaimed. Then he clapped his hand to his forehead. “Oh I’m sorry, was this for your friend?”

“Yes, but I can get more…” I trailed off because he began to pull all sorts of things from his sleeves: a compass, a watering can, seeds, meat jerky, dried fruits, and yellowed papers with strange diagrams. His hand rubbed vigorously on one of them to smooth it out, before slapping it onto the gourd. A new gourd budded off the original. It landed in my hand, full of the same flower water.

“Who are you?” I asked after I tipped the opening to Shangtian’s lips. She began to drink, to my relief.

“I’m Tudi. I am responsible for the upkeep of this garden,” Tudi smacked his lips and said. “Let me repay you for the drink.”

“No—”

“Gemstones? Jade, emerald, or ruby? I’m the God of Earth after all,” He persisted, rummaging through his sleeves again. “You can’t say no. Last time I ate some of Taishang Laojun’s new elixir pills, he said I didn’t have to repay him, but later asked for a favor that cost me an arm and a leg, figuratively. But no, I shall never owe anyone because of my gluttony again.”

Then he asked loudly, “If you don’t want anything, then is there anything you would like help with?”

Help? Perhaps he could help.

“Can you take us to the Celestial Trials? We are candidates, but… we ran into some mishaps.”

“Celestial Trials? You are more than late! We should get you to the Courtyard of Sun and Moon immediately.” He made a flicking motion with his hand, and the empty gourd enlargened to the size of a small boat. He swung his arm, and the gourd flew up in the air.

“I’ll fly on a cloud in front of you,” Tudi said as I pulled Shangtian onto the gourd. I was relieved to see that a bit of color had returned to her face.

“I hope the guards don’t see us,” I said as the gourd began to move through the air.

“Why are you afraid of those meatheads?”

I told him about the guards’ reaction to our arrival.

“They think you are affiliated with Mojie!” Tudi said with a laugh. He returned to the jolly manner from before. “Mojie is due to arrive tomorrow for the Bai Shi Ceremony. Your illegal stairway is similar to antics that they pull. Not to mention, butterflies supposedly hold the clues to Arum’s treasure, which everyone has been after for thousands of years, but particularly Mojie.”

“Ceremony? What ceremony?” I asked with a sinking feeling in my gut.

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