The three of them sat in the kitchen. A small drizzle had set in and the rain could be heard. Michael brewed two cups of coffee and one cup of tea for himself. Tea was only a formality for him at the moment. He wanted nothing more than the earth to swallow him up and suffocate him to death. He was shivering sitting at the table, Elisa at the side while Thomas sat before him.

He kept his eyes on the rising mist from his tea. Mrs. Elisa occasionally took sips while Mr. Thomas took it in gulps. Michael, being the host, decided to speak first.

“Mr. Thomas, Mrs. Elisa,” Michael said, looking between the two. “Sorry if it sounds rude, but I didn’t think you would be here.”

“We are sorry to do this,” Mrs. Elisa said. “And so, we apologize, but we needed to talk to you.”

“Talk to me about what?” Michael asked. He knew, but he didn’t want to admit it.

“About Ana,” Thomas said.

“I am sorry,” Michael said.

“Are you really?” Thomas asked.

“Thomas,” Elisa said, her eyes hardening.

Thomas looked away. “Sorry about that, Michael. I am…”

Michael didn’t need to be told about it. he knew their daughter’s death had been hard. Their only daughter, he thought and a knot tightened in his chest. Both were still grieving and would be for who knows how long. Days, months, years, He felt the deepest sympathy for the old couple.

“I am sorry,” Michael said, “I feel this all have been my fault.”

“No, it isn’t,” Thomas said, looking at his cup. “We were her parents. We were supposed to protect her and—”

“Hush, Thomas,” Elisa said, putting her hand over Thomas’s palm. “We have gone through this already and Michael does not need to hear it.”

“No, it’s fine,” Michael said. But, it did make him uncomfortable. He could remember Ana’s voice in his ears and her face in his mind. Still, he felt it was his duty to listen.

The images became more vivid and soon Michael shuddered and started to cry. He put his face down on the table and cried silently. A pair of gentle arms embraced Michael. He no longer could hold himself. The guilt and the sadness broke through and Michael wailed like a child. He breathed in gasps and his voice became haggard. Elisa started to cry too.

“I am sorry, I am so sorry,” Michael said.

“It is not your fault, Michael,” Elisa said, through her own tears.

He didn’t listen. “I am just so sorry! God, I am so sorry! Sorry, Ana, I am sorry, I am sorry…”

“It is alright, Michael,” Elisa said. “It is all okay.”

“It is not alright,” Michael said, sobbing without control.

“Ssh, child,” Elisa said, rubbing Michael’s head. “I know you wanted to help Ana.”

Elisa nodded, caressing his head. The rain was getting heavier outside. Slowly, Michael’s sobs began to lessen.

Michael looked up at a smiling Elisa. He was amazed how she tried to console him while she was one who must have been grieving the most.

“Oh, I nearly forgot, what were you guys here for?” Michael asked.

Thomas cleared his throat. Tears ran his cheek which Elisa swiped with her hand. He gave a warm look towards her before returning to Michael.

“Before what happened to Ana,” Thomas said. “We had a talk with her.”

“We had visited her three nights ago. She said it was unfair how you were giving your life for her. She said it was not the right to do. We got so worried. We tried to explain to her it was your choice, that you were okay with it. I thought you had said something to her. I asked her and I was angry at you. Instead, it was you who put those thoughts away from her.”

Michael felt a pang of sadness. “Ana was starting to reconsider,” he said. “I tried my best to dissuade her. Seems it didn’t help much.”

Michael stood up to take away the cups. Elisa smiled and handed her the cup while Thomas gave his own. He kept them in the basin, emptying his untouched tea in the drain. He joined them back at the table.

“Ana liked you,” Elisa said, making Michael feel difficult. “Don’t blame yourself. There was nothing you could do and… I have to admit, against what my heart says, there was nothing we could do. She is in a better place. My little girl’s at peace.”

Elisa rubbed her eyes and sniffed. “We are having a funeral the day after tomorrow. Even though not needed, Dr. Richard has been kind to help arrange for the procession. He will be there and we both want you to be there.”

“Go to the funeral?” Michael asked unsure. “I don’t know. I am not even a relative.”

“We think it is best though,” Thomas said and smiled sadly. “Do you know one more thing she said that night?”

“What did she say?” Michael said.

“She said if she lived, she was going to give you the greatest funeral in the world.”

Michael was speechless. Tears started to well up again in Michael. He laughed. He closed his eyes and laughed. So silly, he thought. It was so silly and just like Ana.

“I will come.”

It was sunny on the day of the funeral. There were no dark ominous clouds gathering around the skies. Michael stood at the funeral procession. There was an open casket. He dared not peek or look at it, but he knew he had to do it in a while. Many people were there for the procession, They must have been friends or relatives of the Fortiers, thought Michael. Among them, Michael felt like an outsider.

“Michael,” the voice of Thomas Fortier called out.

Michael turned around to see him. He was wearing a black suit.

“Glad you came,” Thomas said, giving a pat on Michael’s back. “You look good in the suit.”

Michael smiled politely. He too was wearing a suit. He felt awkward in it though, never having worn it many times in his life.

“Thanks, Mr. Thomas,” Michael said. “How are you holding up?”

“I am fine,” Thomas said.

“I am sorry. It must have sounded rude.”

“I know you meant no harm,” Thomas said. “I am very sad, and I think I will be sad for a very long time.”

“I may have to join you in this,” Michael said.

“You have a lot to live and be happy about, Michael,” Thomas said. “You are still very much a young man. It would not be foolish to throw your life way in misery.”—Thomas’s eyes softened—“Ana would not like to see you like this.”

Michael knew he was right. It would not be nice to make Ana sad. He wondered if she was watching them right now. “I will try,” he said. “I think I will try again.”

“Thomas, Michael,” Elisa called out. They both turned around to greet her. She was wearing a black dress and Michael, for the first time was amazed how much she resembled her. “It is time for the ceremony.”

Thomas called Michael and the ceremony began. People gathered and there was a polite silence. Everybody carried a white rose in their hands. All of them went by the coffin, and each put their rose inside.

When it was time for Michael, he crept to the casket. He gazed inside the wooden box to see the face of Ana, pale and dead. She had her eyes closed and her hands laid on her chest. She was too wearing a dress, a white floral one. Tears started to spill, but Michael rubbed them off. He put the rose aside Ana’s shoulder, letting it join the other many.

“Goodbye, Ana,” Michael said. “Be in peace.”

He stepped aside before he could break down. At the last, her parents went. Elisa shivered, putting her hand over her mouth as she gazed at her dead daughter’s face. Her tears had no control. Thomas stood beside her, grim-faced, as he held Elisa by the waist.

“My Ana,” Elisa’s voice rang in Michael’s ears and he could not bear it anymore. He pulled back from the procession and stood near a tree, watching the ordeal from afar.

“Michael,” a figure said approaching him from the left.

“Dr. Richard,” Michael said. “I didn’t see you.”

“Yes, I got a little late. Being a doctor is quite a busy profession.”

“Well, you better join the group,” Michael said. “I think it is getting to the end.”

”I think it might be the best. Why are you far away? Is everything okay?”

“Everything is fine. Just felt like thinking alone.”

He patted Michael’s shoulder. “Be strong, Michael, and try to move ahead.”

“…I will.”

As Dr. Richard went away, Michael closed his eyes. All he could see was Ana.

When he opened his eyes, he found the Fortier couple looking at him from afar. Elisa had stopped crying and gave a smile towards him along with Thomas. Michael smiled back as best as he could and went to join them for the burial.

The night was upon the town. An older Michael sat at the end of the rows of seats. The church had a jovial presence inside of it. There were people and a choir was being held. They were performing ‘Hark! Herald The Angels Sing’ and it was one of Michael’s favorite songs. The air of December was cold. It had gone even cooler as Christmas began knocking at the door. Michael stood up and with a bow, exited the house of God.

He walked through the night city, the decorations on homes, shops, and buildings all lit brightly in the dark. Michael loved this festivity. His cell-phone ringed. He picked it up and heard the all too familiar voice.

“Michael, my boy!” the hearty voice of Thomas said. “How are you this evening?”

“I am doing fine, Mr. Thomas,” said Michael. “How are you and Elisa?”

“Everything’s fine,” Thomas said and added. “You might know why I called?”

“Yes, the Christmas dinner,” Michael said. “As I have been doing for years, yes, I shall come. I will bring some presents.”

“Good, the presents aren’t required as always,” Mr. Thomas said. “I will take my leave now. Elisa says hello.”

“Yes, say my wishes to her too.”

“I shall. Goodbye.”

“Goodbye.”

The call cut off. Michael smiled to himself as he looked at the gray sky which appeared black against the night’s sky.

“Hope you are doing fine, Ana. Merry Christmas.”

The End