《The Tragic Tale of a Zombie Survivalist》Elementary Private Investigator
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Ha, the title of the chapter is a pun...
Shit. It may have been when she scraped my back to pieces when she dropped onto me, it may have been from the time she bit my shoulder so she wouldn’t scream. But I can tell what didn’t turn her into a zombie…Me.
Thankfully, I wasn’t filled with the desire to consume anything so that works. And even if she didn’t turn, she wouldn’t have gotten pregnant since I have no ability to ejaculate. In fact, the only reason she had a good time at all was because I was already stiff!
My first time. Yeah I felt it, but it felt like I wasn’t even there. It kind of freaked me out. Like I wasn’t important, like a toy. To be honest, she is still hot. Even when she’s gray. But since she can’t even think for herself, I am left in a really awkward situation.
Thankfully, it’s still night time. I have another 12 hours before tonight’s broadcast begins to make sure no one sees Rebecca’s current condition. Have her hide in a closet? No, the girls play hide and seek in the house. And Rebecca would never let Sarah outside without supervision!
Shit! What do I do? If the others find out I turned Rebecca, they might misunderstand! And then no one will trust me again!
Hmmmm…
“Rebecca, what do you suggest?”
What? It’s not like she’ll
“I suggest we continue where we left off.”
“Eh? I’m sorry, what?”
“You heard me.”
“That’s what I was afraid of. How are you talking?!”
“Because you asked me a question.”
What…why…I didn’t…whatever.
“Is there anything else you want to say?”
“Yes.”
…
“Go ahead and speak whenever you want to.”
“Alright, I just wanted to let you know I was really afraid before, but now I don’t care. Come on, let’s go back to bed.”
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She is completely emotionless. Am I going to have to give really good instructions so she can appear more human? And why is Rebecca horny? She’s a zombie! Isn’t she supposed to be a flesh eater? Or is she something else?
I knew doing things like this would be counterproductive. Now I’m left with more questions.
“Look, we can go to the room, but we’re locking it and just talking. I don’t want anyone else besides me to see you before I can fix this.”
“Just go tell the truth if you’re that worried.”
We walk into the room and I had Rebecca lock the door. She won’t do anything unless I permit it. This way, she can’t just leap onto me and destroy my innocence again.
Hey, I have an idea, let me get revenge!
NO! Not that way!
“Hey, Rebecca. Tell me about yourself.”
“I was born on”
“Too far, just start with the day of the apocalypse.”
“Richard, my husband, woke me up and told me to pack my things. I grabbed Sarah, and he grabbed Dillon, our son who was younger than Sarah. On the first night Dillon got sick. He didn’t wake up the next morning. And on the third day, we were attacked by bandits. Richard died to let me run away. I hid in collapsed buildings until you found me a couple days ago.”
I wish I could say she had tears forming, but she was still stone cold. It’s okay, I cried for her. You know, I was wondering how I can cry but not ejaculate. Wait, I got off topic.
“Did you love Richard and Dillon?”
“Of course.”
Hah…I’m not getting but the basic answers. Let’s try something else.
“How do you think about me?”
“Decently. Like a child. You are immature and moody. You make simple mistakes and shirk your responsibilities. And your dick is bigger than my husband’s.”
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“Wow. I don’t think I needed that last one. Sure, it helps my self-esteem, but it feels wrong. How about that, how do you feel about sleeping with me?”
“I was scared. I didn’t want to die, but I didn’t want Sarah to die before me even more. If I could do anything to improve her chances of survival, I would. Even if it meant sleeping with the strongest person here.”
“Oh, so you were the one who came up with the idea.”
“Yes. I also wanted a chance to gain a power.”
“You know you could have killed me. You might have earned my powers.”
“But what if I failed? I would die and my daughter would be defenseless. Also, what if I succeeded? I would lose a person capable enough to protect us and we might have to rely on someone not as nice as you. I chose the less risky route.”
“You know, just because the path is easier or less steep doesn’t make it better. Say you’re going hiking. Not that I have, but I read about it. There are two paths to the top, one well used and gradual winding slope up the side or a direct route to the top where not many people go. Which path would be more fun?”
“The longer path. Even though it’s longer, I wouldn’t be so tired.”
“It’s not a race. You can take breaks here and there. Little patches of calm. Taking the shorter path has its disadvantages, but there aren’t many people so animals are more likely to be seen. The ground is rough so you end up looking for a good place to step, forcing you to pay attention to your surroundings. If you were on the other path, you might get bored!”
“…I see. So you wanted me to kill you.”
“Well…no. I was just saying that there were other options.”
"I feel like I made the best choice, even though it wasn’t the right choice.”
I must have spent several hours just talking to her. I heard the girls come inside as they began running around and playing. Then I heard Spot.
“Everything alright in there? Having fun~?”
“I wish.”
Before I could say anything, Rebecca replied first! Shit, don’t do that! I signal her to shut up.
“Ho ho?! I see you need to work on that, Andrew. Can’t have you being weak willed. I actually thought you turned her into a zombie by accident. I guess that must be the reason for you two not doing it, huh?”
Shit…
“Can you shut up while the girls are here?”
“Fine, fine. I’ll leave you two to your own devices!”
Some more time passed, and I can honestly say Rebecca is not in her right mind. She must have had something change within her as well. That was when I noticed the buzzing. Oops, I forgot Rebecca’s monitor downstairs! Shit!
“Stay here and don’t unlock the door for anyone but me.”
I quickly snuck out and grabbed it before booking it for the bedroom.
“It’s me, open the door.”
“How do I know it’s you?”
“Huh? I was just here.”
“But I can’t see you to make sure.”
“Fine, do whatever you want.”
“Does that mean you can tend to my needs tonight?”
“How do you know it’s me? Are you even a zombie or did you actually trick me this entire time?!”
“Okay, I’m opening the door.”
Geez, what a trouble maker. It’s even worse when she is so expressionless.
“Here, let’s hope you get your power.”
Both of our monitors’ screens lit up for the daily broadcast.
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