"The issue is that you’re so tense that you’re hurting yourself," Aria explained. We walked together down a long and snakey tunnel burrowed through the dirt by the giant mole rat colony. I held a torch while she rested her greatsword on her shoulder. "You’re going to get hit. There’s no avoiding it. But your body is so rigid that it’s fighting against the dodge assist."

"It’s not easy to stay relaxed while mutant rodents gnaw on your leg," I grumbled in reply.

Aria chuckled. "It sounds crazy, but you get used to it. Also, if you pick a front-line class, you’ll get pain resistance and natural toughness. Just stick with it a week or so and you’ll be surprised how fast you adapt."

I shook my head. "No way in hell am I playing a front-line class. Let some other idiot spend their time being mauled to death."

"Hey now," Aria said in a playful tone, "you’re not supposed to say that in front of the idiot’s face."

I admit, I hadn’t cared for Aria at first, but it was nice to have someone walk me through the game. We were still in the mole-rat den. We’d killed a bunch of them and ‘harvested’ their teeth. The mole-rats had managed to join their burrows to an abandoned mine, so we had a quest to take copper samples.

Lastly, we had a quest to kill the giant mole rat queen.

This meant wandering along the tunnels, filling out the map, until we found the central nest. I was surprised Aria hadn’t memorized the route, but it turns out that this area was randomly generated and phased for each group that entered.

At least the monster density decreased after we’d harvested enough teeth.

No sooner had I thought that then a familiar hiss came from up ahead. Six giant naked mole rats had appeared in a wall formation. Their plump, greased bodies were packed one on top of another and then melded together, stuffed like a sausage into the tunnel. Somehow, the resultant mass was able to crawl forward with its dozen hand-like paws while its six mouths snapped blindly at the air.

We could run. The thing was slow-moving and hadn’t spotted us. I would have preferred that.

Aria was having none of that. She hefted up her sword and rushed forward, at the end, she performed a fancy slashing attack. A mole-rat head bounced merrily along the floor, still snapping its teeth. Legacy weapons apparently let you slot some abilities early.

I ran to join her and do what damage I could given my only attack was randomly waving my sword at things. However, as our opponent was a giant wall of naked rodent flesh, it was easy to hit. I stabbed at it while it hissed and snapped at Aria, jumping away when one tried to bite me. What I wouldn’t give for a weapon with reach.

We managed to decapitate all six heads. As Aria had acted as my meat shield, I’d hardly taken any damage. She had a few nasty-looking bites that she bandaged up. There were infectious and venomous attacks in the game, but unless a mob specifically had one, you didn’t have to worry about bites getting you sick.

While she rested, I used her curved [Hunter’s Blade] to carve up the thick slab of flesh that blocked our path. I’d managed to unlock the common Butchery skill used to dismember beasts and monsters in the game; it provided skins for Leathercrafting, parts for Alchemy, and other goods.

By the time I finished, there was a neat hole for us to walk through. I’d also gathered five [Silky Skins], which I gave to Aria, and a pair of pink moccasins.

I tugged them onto my feet. Like other clothing items in Penumbra, they shifted to fit their wearer. The slippers were comfortable but provided less armor than my [Fine Novice Boots]. They warmed my feet, radiating heat like a living thing. In fact, walking around with them felt strangely like walking on someone’s fat belly.

Aria caught my confused expression and misread it.

"If they’re not to your tastes, you could sell them at the auction house," she suggested as we stepped through the hole. I pointedly ignored the viscera on display.

"They can’t be worth much." I continued to wear them despite the small drop in armor. The soft booties, their color similar to strawberry milk, clashed terribly with my Novice uniform but I liked how they kept my toes nice and warm. Comfort matters.

"You can use dyes to enchant them into stealth shoes. People will grab them up, upgrade them, and then relist them. It’s only a handful of silvers but you’ll get it in an hour or so. Better than coppers from a merchant."

I nodded as though I were considering her words.

"Have you given any thought to what professions you’ll pick up?" Aria asked.

"None whatsoever. You?" I got the sense that Aria was the type of player to plan everything well in advance.

"I’m going to go artificer primarily with some alchemy as well. I want to make myself a Moloch," she replied. I gave her a questioning look. "It’s one of the sky trains. I plan to take this character to the Far Reaches and want her to have her own transportation."

"That makes sense."

"The usual advice is to pick up gathering professions for your first character and sell to other players. I’ve never found that satisfying. If you wanted to be a gatherer, why not simply spend your time on a farm?"

I almost had spent my time on a farm. It made me wonder how Aria’s interaction with the character creation program had gone. Had she simply dismissed it and picked from a list? Told it exactly what she wanted? Aria didn’t seem the type to allow the sort of loss of control my more lackadaisical approach prompted.

As we continued down the snaking passageway, it dipped downwards. The air became hot and suffocating.

"I’m getting a headache," I said.

"Bosses exude pressure," Aria said, her voice low. "We’re close now. This is a Novice area so don’t be too worried. As long as we work together, this will be easy."

"Do we have a plan?"

Naturally, she had one. "I’ll go in first, draw aggro. There will be the queen and a bunch of minions. Focus on cutting down the minions. When the queen gets to half-heath, she’ll call out and a second wave will come scurrying in. Back off and I’ll get their aggro. Repeat. Easy peasy, lemon squeezey."

I frowned in concern. "That doesn’t sound easy."

"The minions are baby mole rats. They hardly do any damage to a level 8 Novice. I just have to focus on not getting chomped by the queen while you dispatch them."

My palms were sweaty. The farther down we went, the more the pressure in the air built. It didn’t hurt but it was interesting they gave bosses a tangible presence.

We reached the central nest and I peered in. Within, the dirt floor was covered in nesting material. A corpulent, elephant-sized mole rat sow laid on her side while a dozen small mole rats suckled at her. The scent of warm milk filled the air and made my stomach twist.

Aria looked unimpressed but she favored me with a small smile. "Tell me whenever you’re ready, and we’ll begin."

"Are you sure we can handle this? Just the two of us?"

"I beat this encounter solo on my last character. Though I used two scrolls I brought from the player shop. Remember, it’s a game. It’s made to look scary and impressive, but it’s a fair challenge."

Aria was right. Everything we’d faced so far had moderately challenging if we worked together. This would be slightly more difficult, but not overwhelming. I was psyching myself out for no reason.

"I’m ready." My voice sounded clear and confident. I didn’t feel that way, but I could fake it in a pinch.

Aria hefted up her greatsword. Her gaze was calm and focused. It occurred to me that I’d been lucky to encounter her and I wondered if there was anything I could do to thank her. Probably not. She had high-level characters and had played for years now. Best concentrate on not fucking up in the middle of this.

Aria dashed forward, greatsword trailing behind her in a move I was familiar with by now. The sow raised her rectangular head and sniffled idly. The mole rats had poor vision and so the queen didn’t realize what was happening until Aria was on her. Her blade cut a scythe through the air. Her first blow sliced a few of the ratlings in half and cut into the sow's belly.

The sow let out a piercing cry of pain and sprang to its feet. Its children tumbled to the ground and then, as one, swarmed Aria. As they tumbled towards her, she kept her eye on their mother. This seemed as good a time as any to join the festivities.

The young mole rats were about the size of small dogs and attacked by leaping at Aria’s legs and nipping them and then hopping back. I thrust my sword into one as it jumped. It fell to the ground, bleeding and wasn’t able to right itself before I finished it off.

Two hits then to kill one. Aria was right, this wouldn’t be too difficult.

With a renewed confidence, I began hacking at the rats. Sometimes they’d be able to turn my way and attack before I got in a second or third hit, but the going was much easier for me. I’d managed to cut down five of them. Aria’s reinforced pant legs were slick with blood and I worried that she’d made a mistake trying to tank all of them at once.

I pushed myself, ignoring the rather sick feeling in my gut whenever I slid my blade into a mole rat flank.

"Watch for the charge," Aria barked. My head snapped up. I’d focused so hard on fighting the minions that I hadn’t paid attention to the queen. The giant sow had backed up, its head lowered, and was pawing at the grass-covered ground like a bull.

It ran forward with an angry grunt, trampling a few of its offspring and sending others flying in all directions. I managed to scramble away in time and it barreled past me. By the time I realized I could attack its flank without fear, it was already out of reach. It slammed into the wall and the room shook as dirt fell from the ceiling.

"Thanks," I said.

Again, my body was drenched in sweat. I gripped my sword hilt tightly, fearing I might drop it again.

Aria only nodded, her eyes never leaving the queen. It slumped against the wall, dazed.

"We should attack it while it’s dow..." I began to say. She shook her head and moved to the nearest minion. By the time the queen recovered and rolled back onto her feet, we’d finished off the remaining ones.

Aria had said that another minion wave would spawn when the queen was at half health, but monsters in this game didn’t have health bars. How was I to know when that was? I probably should have asked before the fight started.

"Come here, beautiful. Come on..." Aria called to the queen. Instead of running towards her, she moved in a slow arc. The queen sniffed cautiously, following Aria’s song and ignoring me. It might not even be able to see me if I didn’t move.

It limped forward. Aria must have injured its front leg. I wondered if I could use this moment to attack or not. As a Novice, Aria didn’t have any abilities that allowed her to taunt or increased her aggro, she was face tanking. It was hard not to look at the queen’s big, round butt and not swipe at it, but I waited until Aria lashed out at the queen again.

Rather than the large and inviting target of the rat’s posterior, I sliced at its back leg, hoping to hit a tendon. It hissed in pain and started to turn, giving Aria a chance to deliver a powerful downward chop to its neck.

If this were the real world, that would be the end of things. Even if the blow didn’t slice through the neck, it would have done enough damage to the spine to cripple or kill the queen.

Instead, it just made her mad. The queen spun back to Ara, hissing. A red glow suddenly came from her body and she puffed up, slightly growing in size. A chattering sound came from afar but rapidly grew. I stepped back, unsure. Other than the tunnel we’d come in, I didn’t see any way into the room, but the noise wasn’t coming from there. It came from all around.

"Where are they?" I asked.

"Below," she snapped.

When the chattering was at its loudest, mole rats burst out from mounds. Rather than being babies, these were full grown. One escaped from the earth right beside me and showered me with dirt as it burrowed out.

I yelped, jumping back in fear. It swung its rectangular face towards me. Its tiny eyes glowed with hate as it charged me.

"Oh shit..." I muttered. Aria was absorbed with the queen. Even if she’d noticed one had attacked me, she wasn’t close enough to intervene.

My computer-generated instinct kicked in and I jerked out of the way of its first attack. I was completely unready for my body to do that and ended up losing balance. I fell over on my side, hitting my hip hard as the soldier mole rat snapped at empty air.

I looked to Aria again for help and realized that she now faced the queen and four soldier rats. Her face was hard and damp with sweat. Not only was this harder than the infants but I wasn’t there supporting her.

I scrambled to my feet. This was embarrassing; I wasn’t helping her and I was fleeing from a single enemy while she took on several. When the mole-rat attacked again, I thrust at it. My sword ended up buried in its shoulder at an awkward angle as it snagged part of my arm. Blood trickled down its front, but it wouldn’t let go. Using my left hand, I pounded at the top of its head and when that didn’t work, scratched at its eyes.

There was a sharp, sudden pain in my calf. My head snapped around to see a second mole rat had noticed me. Its thick teeth were buried in the muscle of my leg. It jerked its head and pulled backward. I cried out as I lost my footing a second time.

Have you ever seen two dogs play tug-of-war with a rope? The mole rat soldiers proceeded to do that with me. My momentary resolve melted away and I howled in pain. My screams and the scent of blood washing from my leg caught a third one’s attention.

It waddled happily away from Aria and to me. I thrashed and yelled as it came near, our faces at level. Its mouth opened wide.

Behind it, I caught a glimpse of Aria. She’d spotted me and the look of complete bewilderment on her face was almost comical. I would have laughed at the expression at any other time.

Then the third soldier mole rat bit into my stomach. It threw all of its strength into a roll to the side. The most exquisite pain flooded my body as it tore my stomach open and thick, noodle-like intestines slithered out of me onto the ground.

It dropped the bloody chunk of me from its mouth and shoved its muzzle into my gut. The game’s pain overrides kicked in and all feeling left my body as it burrowed straight through my middle.

Then the world turned black my consciousness left that body.

I floated in darkness. The sound of screaming in my head died down. What the hell was this crazy game? How high was the developer who created intestine devouring monsters and put them in a Novice area?

The scene replayed itself over and over in my mind as I drifted. The scent iron scent of blood mixed with the queen’s sour milk and the rank of my own offal. The mole rat’s four yellowed teeth chewed into my gut. The tension as the two soldiers yanked my body back and forth along the ground.

Though the details remained sharp, the emotional intensity dulled. I stopped experiencing and instead watched as Janus was attacked.

Eventually, I felt restless, bored even. The lack of physical stimulation bothered me. I wanted to move and stretch but had no body. How long was this taking? Time was sluggish there. My rational mind told me it could only be a few minutes but that did nothing for my impatience. I wanted out and I wanted out now.

Mentally, I squirmed. Pushing against the nothingness that enveloped me. There was resistance there. I focused on it. Shoved my will against it. Pounded my thoughts and growing frustration against it.

A sound like snapping ice filled the darkness and then a sliver of light appeared. I swam towards it. My senses were returning. My limbs twisted and moved through a warm, thick liquid. It filled my lungs but I had no problems breathing.

I bumped into something smooth and hard within the dark liquid. My mental efforts had created a small crack and it was from this that light reached me. Peering out, I could see a pile of twigs and an overcast sky.

The crack was just wide enough for me to slide my fingers into. I couldn’t get a grip though and so resorted to stomping at the crack. The surface broke, bits of it snapping off and falling into the darkness behind me. The hole widened and when it was large enough, I swam upwards and out.

Clamoring out, I tossed myself on the ground. The air was cool on my damp skin. Under me was a thick bed of twigs and leaves woven together. My eyes flicked to where I emerged. It was a familiar shape—an egg. A blue egg dappled with brown, just large enough for me to stretch out in.

My thoughts were interrupted by a sharp pain in my chest as I tried to inhale. I coughed and a reddish gel burst from my mouth. While my lungs had been fine with the liquid while I was submerged, they wanted air now. I coughed violently for about half a minute until I could catch my breath again.

Once I recovered, I got to my feet, confirming what I’d seen before: I was standing in a massive nest with half a dozen coffin-sized eggs, one of which I’d crawled out of.

As respawns went, it was completely bizarre. Though I was starting to suspect that a large number of illegal drugs had gone into the making of Penumbra.

The nest I was in took up the top of a common maple tree. I swung my legs over the side and carefully made my way down. I recalled that harpies were in the game. It wouldn’t surprise me if they were one of the exotic races. Perhaps the game had glitched and my blue elf had gotten their respawn instead of appearing at the dungeon’s campgrounds like I was supposed to.

I landed softly on the grass just in time for a boom to fill the air. Looking around, I saw a trail of dark smoke arc through the sky. It landed in the distance and exploded.

Was that… artillery fire?

In response, a barrage came from beyond a distant hill. I watched five black plumes of smoke sail overhead before thundering to the ground. Even from far away, their blast rumbled loud enough to hurt my ears and cause black birds to take flight.

Just my luck. First eaten, then respawned in an egg, and now I seemed to be in a warzone.

The birds had wisely taken flight and headed away from the bombardment area, and I followed them. I just wanted to reach level 10 Novice and unlock a class. Preferably one good at not being chewed upon. My map for this area had yet to unlock so I kept an eye out as I traveled for a suitably tall tree or building I could climb to get an overview of the area.

I assumed if that unlocked a map before, it would do so again.

The bird calls got stronger as traveled through the young forest. The trees were short and spread apart, giving me enough room and light to walk comfortably.

Stepping from the woods into a clearing, I caught sight of what the birds had led me to and stopped dead. There was no grass in the clearing. The grown looked like it had been burned and salted. Only a single, solitary tree remained, its dark and twisted branches stretched tall and wide. Not a single leaf sprouted from it but a dozen bodies hung from its lowest bows.

It was this that had brought the birds. The crows cawed riotously among themselves as they pecked at the proffered feast.

I knew I should turn away but something drew me forward. The bodies were naked and all female. And as my feet took me to the tree, my heart began to pound and my limbs shivered.

The body that hung closest to me was one of the smallest. It felt familiar. It looked familiar. I had seen this face before.

But it wasn’t until I stood right below the corpse that the truth clicked in my mind. This was halfling me.

Her plump, rosy cheeks had been pecked at until I could see the white of her skull. Her mouth hung open, lips blue. I looked from body to body. There was human me as well. And gnoll me. And the others--all were of different races, but all seemed to be me.

As I stood there gaping, one of the crows stopped its pecking and noticed me for the first time.

"You look," she said, "like you’ve just seen a ghost."