Chapter 7.

Another month passed by peacefully.

Though today seemed to be a special day. As soon as I stepped into the bar today I was greeted by a hero with dark bags under his eyes.

“Com… pleted. We… finally escaped and killed the required one million orcs. Reward. Now. Hand it over.”

“Escaped… uh… did you go after an army of orcs by any chance?”

“Yeah, our party gathered intel on the location with the largest number of orcs and we went into it overconfident because they were all top rankers. We were captured and held and prisoners. It took months to finally escape.”

“Haha… sounds rough.” I guess it was my fault for not warning them. I didn’t think they would be that stupid though. I mean they were top rankers, right?

DH1M was already level 80. He was still stuck in this beginner village though and had yet to even start the main storyline. Oh well, it’s their own fault for not being able to figure out the trigger condition, not mine. I’m in no way at fault for their stupidity.

“Am I finally done with the beginner village? Can I finally move past the tutorial?”

“Uh… I mean. I’d like to say yes, but the answer is still no.”

“You’re breaking my balls man! Just give me freedom!”

The hero suddenly broke down into tears.

“Uh…” I don’t know what am I supposed to tell you man?

“You want a beer bud? It’s on me.”

“S-Sure.”

“Hey Ria, can I get a beer for the poor sap over here?”

“Coming right up.”

“Hey NPC69.”

“What is it?”

“I’ve come to the realization that life is only suffering. It’s just a dark place where hard work isn’t rewarded and the people at the top just look down on you and make fun of your struggles.”

“Bro, real talk. It’s just a game, no need to take this so seriously.” Jesus, what has this hero seen over the last seven months I haven’t seen him?

“Anyway, you want to know what your next quest is?”

“I’d rather not, but what is it?”

“Ten mil-”

I hesitated as my words were cut short when the hero looked like he was about to kill himself.

“Nine… uh… no, make that five million. Eh? Still too much. Uh...two?”

“Can’t I just have an easy quest like gathering some freaking herbs for once!” The hero’s eyes were bloodshot and bulging.

“Then… how about get two million-”

“Reasonable numbers my man! Reasonable fucking numbers, god damn it!”

I shrunk back a bit.

“Then… how about collecting five dandelions or something?”

“Yes! THAT! Exactly that you freak!”

The hero broke down into more uncontrollable tears when he heard the quest.

“Then... I guess that will be your next quest. As for your reward from your last quest, here you go.”

I pulled out a legendary armor set from my inventory and casually tossed it onto his lap.

He immediately picked the armor set up and embraced it like it was the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen.

“It was all worth it.” He cried when he inspected the stats.

“I knew the reward would be good after I checked out the stats of the legendary sword you gave me.”

Uh… that legendary sword was my carpet, but if you’re that happy about it, who am I to judge? I guess it’s true what they say, one man’s trash is another man’s treasure.

At least this hero seems a bit better than the last asshole I had to put up with. I’ve honestly been taking out my frustration from having to put up with the last few insufferable heroes all on this noob.

“Hey kid, now that you’ve got some decent gear I’d suggest just rerolling for a new storyline. Nobody will blame you for giving up. This isn’t a storyline you’ll be able to survive. You’ll lose all the hard work you put in if you die even once you know.”

”One beer.”

“Ah. Thanks, Ria.”

“I can’t give up now. Two of my party members lost their characters because they died during our escape. We were completely surrounded and they held them all back on their own. Only me and White made it out. White’s at the inn resting right now, she didn’t want to come and meet you. She says every time she does she ends up losing herself in rage.”

Uweh! Heavy! What is with this atmosphere? Kid, I’m an NPC, not your life counselor. What am I supposed to say here?

The kid suddenly took a sip of the beer Ria placed in front of him.

“Just get stronger so you don’t have to feel that way again kid.” So embarrassing! Did I really just say such an embarrassing line with such a serious expression?

“Yeah. I will. I’ll definitely kill the Greater Demon God no matter what and save this world.”

Kid, please don’t get so damn immersed in this game. It’s just a game man. A game I tell ya! I’m the freaking NPC here and I’m the one telling you that. Why are our roles so reversed?

“Hey NPC69. Have you heard about anything related to a mysterious masked man donning a legendary black robe with a ridiculously overpowered sword?”

“Huh? I haven’t taken a single step outside this village since you left. How could I possibly know anything about a weirdo like that?”

“You mean you weren’t related to that person?”

“Related to that person? What do you mean?”

“Well… during our escape from the orc army… as White and I were about to fail in our escape at a critical juncture, an unreasonably powerful man stepped in and single-handedly decimated the pursuing army. They made it look completely effortless.”

Eh?

”When we first ran past them we tried to tell them to escape, but they didn’t bother to spare us a single word like talking took up too much energy. He simply stood there aloof with his back to us. In complete silence, he unsheathed his sword, not even bothering to spare us a glance they wrote a message on the ground.”

“A message? And what did it say?”

“It said… hurry up and get your ass back to the beginner village. When you see that guide of yours tell him to get off his lazy ass and pay me a visit already.”

My expression immediately turned constipated. The hero ran into the GDR and had his life saved by her and he didn’t even know it. This kid was even hellbent on killing her after she helped him. What am I even supposed to say to this?

Do I tell him to go prostrate and thank the GDR for saving him from the minions of her minion’s minions? Well, it’s actually a few more levels down the line, but it’s too annoying to narrow it down further.

“I really have no idea who this person could be.” I averted my eyes to one side.

“Haaaah. I see. They must have mistaken me for someone else then.”

“Yeah. That’s right, they definitely mistook you for someone else. I don’t know any wandering masked weirdos like that. None. At all.” My eyes were swimming trying to forget. I know nothing. I never heard about any of this. Yeah, just ignore it. This never happened.

What the hell is that idiotic woman thinking though? Did she get cocky? Does she think she can take the hero down easily at any time now because she got a few free powerful handouts from me?

I habitually took out a cigar as I started smoking to try and cool down.

“That person was unbelievably strong. If I could become as strong as that person I bet not even the Greater Demon God would be my match.”

“Hah. Yeah, I bet.” You’d only be equals though considering they are one in the same person.

“NPC69, you’re my guide, right? If you are, how can I get stronger?”

“Stronger? By leveling up?” Why are you asking such stupid questions? This is a game man. How else would you get stronger?

“I have a weapon and armor, but surely there’s some sort of powerful skill that you can teach me.”

“A powerful skill? Didn’t I already show you one when you first came? Did you not bother to learn it?”

“You did?”

“Yeah, remember the brick?”

“Weren’t you just messing with me? I threw that brick hundreds of times but not once did a slime receive any damage.”

“Well… if you really insist on learning a skill from me I suppose I can try to teach you again. The great art of Brickwondo, would you like to learn it?”

“Brick won do? You’re still messing with me?”

“I’m not messing with you though. This is an art form that I personally created. It’s a unique fighting style that you can learn from no one but me.”

“Is it really that strong?”

“Yes, it is the strongest. When mastered to its peak no one will dare stand in your way.”

“If it’s really as powerful as you say then I’ll try it.”

“Then follow me, young grasshopper.”

The hero downed his beer and I paid for the both of us on the way out.