《The Other Side of the Bed - Half-Stuck in a Fantasy World》24. The Equinox Festival
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The festival inspector arrived a few minutes late for his 5pm appointment, looking haggard and overworked. His short brown hair was a tousled mess and his face was bristly with a couple days of beard growth. He approached the stand and said, "I'm the health inspector, Grecc. I heard you're selling a drink?"
Zach stepped forward, already holding the paper the event planner had giving him. "That's right. I'm Zach, and we're selling Equinox Coffee, a cold drink with milk, sugar, and coffee of course." He gestured to Beebee, who quickly started filling a tin cup with pre-mixed coffee. "Would you like one, free of charge?"
The man nodded slowly and took the piece of paper and the offered cup, but he didn’t drink. "Thanks. Can I see how you're storing the beverage?"
"Yes, right this way." Zach waved him around the table and led the way into the tent. Inside, Riley was kneeling and had her hands pressed to two of the tanks, channeling mana into the liquid inside. Frost was forming on the metal nearest her hands.
Zach said, "As you can see, Riley is a Conjurer, and she's keeping all our milk and mixed product nice and cold, just above freezing."
Riley smiled up at the inspector and he nodded back. Then the man said, "Where'd you get the water?"
Zach was a little surprised at the question, but he supposed it made some sense. "We got all our water from the municipal spout by the Norwood Dairy, where we bought the milk."
"That's good," he said, then he finally sipped from his coffee. "Tastes good, too."
Grecc left the tent, so Zach and Riley followed. When he reached the table, he downed the entire cup of coffee in a few gulps, then set the cup down. In a flat tone, he said, "Make sure you clean those cups properly before serving them again. There is a safe water supply you can use behind stall number four."
"Thank you," Zach said. Thanks to Riley, Zach had already known about that water spout and had planned to use it for washing the cups, but it was nice to hear that it was formally allowed. After all, the woman at the health inspection office had originally said that no water would be provided.
Grecc nodded, then walked off, heading toward another stall.
Once he was out of earshot, Riley stepped close to Zach's side and whispered, "Did you catch his odd phrasing on the water supply?"
"Yeah," Zach replied. "It made it sound like some of the water in the city isn't safe. Any idea what that's about?"
Movement off to the left caught his eye. Beebee was standing by the table with hands clasped behind her back and her whole body squirming. Zach asked, "Are you alright, Beebee?"
"I'm fine."
"Then what's with the wiggling?" Riley asked.
"I can't say," Beebee answered.
Zach raised an eyebrow. "You can't say why you're wiggling? That doesn't make any sense."
Beebee turned to face him, an intense look on her youthful face. "I can't talk about the answer to your water question, so I'm trying not to talk about it. It's hard."
Riley and Zach shared a glance, then Riley said, "Then let's all just forget about it. You don't need to say anything. Customers should be arriving soon anyway."
Zach was terrified. Fire and lightning arced through the sky, followed by earth-rumbling thunder. It was as if the entire world was ending in a chain-reaction of reality-shattering detonations. Zach's knees gave out and he fell backwards, landing hard on the grass.
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"Zach? Are you okay?" Riley asked, kneeling next to him with her hand on his shoulder.
Above their heads, the cacophony continued, explosion after explosion, blue-white lightning leaving afterimages in Zach's eyes. The entire festival grounds were bathed in colored light and radiating heat.
Zach's first thought was that some sort of magical war was being waged overhead, like the ones from his dreams, the ones where hundreds of men were slaughtered in seconds by terrifying spells. His second thought was that he was just far too close to a massive fireworks display, like the big municipal shows every 4th of July.
"Oh," he said, his voice weak. "This is part of the festival?" He could barely hear his own voice over the noise of the magical explosions.
"Yep!" Beebee cheered. "It's my favorite part! Well, aside from the food and people and staying up all night."
Riley helped Zach to his feet. "Sorry, I should have warned you. They always start the festival off with a big magical display. The King recalls his best mages from the wilderness, since monsters don't attack during the equinox, and they put on quite the show."
Zach's eyes followed a jagged bolt of lightning back to its source and saw distant robed figures on the top of the Gwendolyn wall. He gestured weakly at the sky, still filled with fireballs and now what looked like a giant bird made of lightning, flying from the east to the west.
"This is normal?" he asked.
Riley nodded. "Very normal. Mana is basically limitless right now, so the mages can go all out and show the people the full strength of our defenders. It makes the citizens feel safe."
"Safe…" Zach said. It made sense, once he wasn't misinterpreting it as the end of the world. It was like a military parade and fireworks display all in one.
Zach brushed some dirt and grass off the seat of his pants, then busied himself with a final check of the table. The sign was propped up on the left side of the table, clearly advertising Equinox Coffee for one Hart per cup. All the tin cups were stacked in a pyramid and a ten gallon tank of the prepared drink stood ready. Customers were flooding into the festival grounds and they'd reach Zach's stall soon.
"Um, Beebee? Can you handle the first customers?" Zach asked. He was still feeling a bit shaken and not quite ready to deal with the public.
"Of course!" Beebee said, her grin illuminated by the glowing orbs of magic that floated over the entire area. Zach liked the silent sources of light much more than the fire and lightning from the magic show.
Hiring Beebee turned out to be one of Zach's best decisions. Her cheerful attitude was contagious and the sound of her laughter carried far. Soon the number of people waiting to purchase an Equinox Coffee had grown into a crowd that threatened to block the main path.
Zach stepped in with a solution. He whispered a plan to Riley and Beebee, then waited off to the side of the table in the large grass-filled clearing.
Beebee climbed on the table, being careful to keep her dress from flipping up, and waved to get everyone's attention. Her bright orange outfit definitely helped. "Hi everyone! Having a good time?"
Cheers answered her, coming from peasant and noble alike. While some people were slightly annoyed at the wait to get the strange drink they'd been hearing about, everyone was genuinely having fun at the festival. In addition to all the vendor stalls, some of which sold alcohol, there were performers in the center clearing who were singing, dancing, and even juggling fire.
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Beebee called back, "That's great to hear! Now don't worry, we've got more than enough Equinox Coffee for everyone, but this crowd is getting in the way of the footpath. If you're waiting to buy coffee, can you please move to my right, where my friends will help you form an orderly line?"
Riley waved a hand over her head to show everyone where to go, and people started moving her way. She also cast seductive glances at a few of the men that met her eyes. Within a minute, Zach and Riley successfully corralled everyone into a simple queue that started at the table, ran behind the tent, and looped back around to rejoin the path.
From then on, whenever Riley wasn't busy inside the tent keeping the drinks chilled, she walked along the line, flirting lightly and nudging people as needed to keep the line straight. Meanwhile, Zach and Beebee worked the table, pouring drinks, taking money, and keeping tabs on the rented tin cups. Whenever the clean cups started to run low, one of the three ran off with an armful of dirty ones to wash them at the water spout.
Originally, Zach had been a little worried about interacting with the public, having to be a salesman and trying to draw attention to the stand. But once things got rolling, he was too busy to worry as he worked furiously to serve the drink that was basically selling itself. When the festival first started at sundown, few people had wanted coffee, but by 11pm the demand was clear.
As the customers kept coming, Zach overheard a lot of conversations and talked with some strangers, and he learned that a disproportionate number of the attendees were off-duty guards. They had returned from monster duty for the holiday, one of only four times a year that they could truly relax.
From a talkative older woman, Zach heard that the festival was a celebration of mana and the sun, the life that they both brought to the world, and the peace that came with every solstice and equinox. The celebrations were an old and important tradition that predated New Albion. In fact, such traditions were some of the reason why New Albion's ancestors had been chased from the Old Kingdom, formerly known as England. The 'mad king' had hated magic above all else, and three hundred years ago, he'd exiled anyone who practiced or worshipped it.
Just before midnight, the line for coffee dwindled away almost entirely, leading Zach to ask, "What's going on? Where's everyone going?"
"Ooh, the King must be doing his presentation soon!" Beebee said.
Riley nodded in agreement. "You don't want to miss that, Zach. Go with Beebee to check it out. I'll watch the stall."
In the center clearing, surrounded by a ring of guards, stood a tall man. He had wavy brown hair that grazed the tops of his shoulders, and he wore black pants and a blue dress shirt like a merchant might wear. Only the golden crown on his head gave any indication that he was a king. Unlike the delicate tiara that Evelyn sometimes wore, the King's crown was elaborate, solid, and decorated with bright blue and red gemstones. And Zach recognized its shape from every Crown coin he'd seen.
"So that's Evelyn's father?" Zach whispered to Beebee. They were both standing on a stone bench so they could see over the crowd.
"Yep. King Gildahart is a good man, and he's very friendly, even to the castle staff."
The King pressed his palms to his neck for a moment, then spoke, his voice far louder than any natural voice. "Hello, everyone! I'm happy to be here with you for yet another wonderful equinox celebration. Tonight, in a precious moment of peace, we celebrate magic and all it has given us. But no less important, we celebrate our community and our defenders."
He waved an arm, pointing at all the guards around him. "These young men and women, along with thousands more Guards throughout the kingdom, fight against the monsters of the wilds so that the rest of us can know peace. On this equinox, they are able to return home to friends and family, and many have joined us at this very festival. Please keep them in your hearts as you enjoy the celebration, and as you return to your daily lives tomorrow."
Near the center of the clearing, several small children were inching closer and closer to the King's guards, as if expecting something. The King noticed them and smiled, then said, "It seems some of you are eager for the next part of the festivities, so I'll move this along."
He waved a hand over his head, causing small sparks of white light to shoot into the air. They flew a dozen or so feet in random directions before fizzling out. He took a deep breath and said, "Magic can be a spectacle, but we mustn't forget that it is also our savior. When the Old Kingdom exiled our people to this continent, only the timely invention of Rider magic carried us safely through the wild Elven woods to this fair land. The combat magic of Mages defended us against monsters, Elves, and Lizardfolk. And Healers and Purifiers kept our people healthy and comfortable. Magic has given us those things and many more, and we must never forget that."
Then King Gildahart went to one knee and pressed a fist to his forehead. Many in the audience followed suit. Zach and Beebee couldn't really kneel where they were standing on a bench, so they just mimicked the fist-to-forehead part. Then the King said, "May mana protect us all."
The audience echoed the same words at a low murmur, then the festival grounds grew quiet. The King broke the silence by saying, "Alright children, you've waited long enough. Gather around now."
The young kids who had been creeping closer, along with dozens more from the crowd, all ran forward giggling and shouting. The guards let them through and the children clustered around the King, not the least bit intimidated by the regal man.
He waded through the swarming kids to a marble statue upon a pillar, one of many scattered around the gardens. This statue was of a horse rearing back on its hind legs and it was perhaps four feet tall. King Gildahart pressed a hand to the side of the horse and closed his eyes in concentration, then the ground started to rumble.
About twenty feet away in an empty clearing that was ringed by guards, the earth split open. Dirt and grass fell away as something pushed its way up from beneath: a column that was dark brown and textured like a tree's bark, yet slightly shiny like polished wood. It grew and grew, reaching twenty feet tall in seconds, then the top fractured and branched out like a tree in every direction. All along the various branches, small buds appeared, hundreds in total. They grew rapidly, becoming tiny figures, miniature replicas of the horse statue in the same rearing pose.
"Wow!" yelled one of the children, and much of the audience echoed the sentiment, including adults. Even with broader vocabularies, there weren't many other words to describe the odd situation.
Then the four-inch-tall horses started to drop from the strange 'tree', landing safely on the soft grass below. Before anyone could react, the King proclaimed, "Please take one horse figure each, children. Any left over should go to parents to give to other children who couldn't make it tonight, or already fell asleep."
Then the gathered kids stampeded toward the tree and the guards scrambled to get out of their way. It was definitely chaos, but a joyous kind.
"See? He's a good man," Beebee said, smiling broadly.
Zach was slow to react. He was a little stunned by the impressive display of what he assumed was physical augmentation magic. Though at that scale, a name like 'creation magic' seemed more apt. He eventually said, "That was amazing. Does he do that every year?"
"No, but he always creates something and always invites the kids to see it up close. You saw that he can make lights and change his voice with magic, but his speciality is definitely building. Last year he made all the marble pillars around the garden that the statues are on now." Beebee paused to watch the children play with their new souvenirs, then added, "This is the first time he made toys."
"Maybe he's feeling nostalgic about kids, now that his daughter's back?" Zach mused. Then he said, "Wait, where is Evelyn? Wouldn't it make sense for her to be here with the King?"
Beebee shook her head. "Sorry, but I can't tell you."
Zach was more than a little curious and he guessed it could have been related to the thing with the water earlier, but he didn't pry. Instead, he asked, "Shall we head back to the stall? People are going to be drifting back that way, and we shouldn't leave Riley to deal with them all alone."
"Oh, yes. Let's hurry!" Beebee said, right back to her normal attitude.
The crowds thinned as the hours passed, but Zach's Equinox Coffee kept selling steadily. Repeat customers came back for another pick-me-up and new customers visited as they got tired. By 3am, the stand was down to the last 10 gallon batch, and it was going fast. Of course, Zach, Riley, and Beebee had been drinking some themselves, because they really needed the caffeine to keep up with the festival crowds.
"Here you go," Riley said as she held out some wooden skewers of grilled meat and vegetables toward Zach and Beebee. "I know it's the same thing we had for dinner, but it's one of the only food stalls still open."
Zach took a skewer and shook his head. "It's fine. These are tasty. Thanks for getting the food for us."
"No problem. I'd rather not send Beebee out there anyway. The drunks are getting a little grabby." Indeed, some of the festival goers had been drinking for up to nine hours straight, and the guards couldn't be everywhere all the time. The festival was intended to be family friendly, but very few families actually stayed all twelve hours until sunrise. The people that did stick around tended to get a little wilder as the morning went on.
Beebee didn't react to the comment about her, so she might not have heard. She absentmindedly thanked Riley for the food, then went back to selling coffee. For how hyperactive she could be, she really was good about staying focused on her task. Zach would have to mention it to Evelyn sometime.
The trio ate their kabobs and returned to the now-familiar coffee selling routine for three more hours, until the coffee finally sold out around 6am.
"Sorry sir," Beebee said to the last man in line after serving the person before him. "That was the last of our coffee."
"Aww, alright. I've already had two cups, so I'm not too bothered," he said, then he wandered off, carrying a leather bag over his shoulder, filled with various souvenirs.
Zach tipped the booth's sign over and laid it flat on the table, then turned to Beebee and Riley. "Great work, you two. Now all that's left is to get everything packed up, then I'll pay you and you can head home."
"You got it, boss," Beebee said. She still sounded cheerful, but her weary eyes showed how tired she really was.
Together, they cleaned up their area, broke down the tent, and stacked everything for when Jay returned with his cart. Zach had scheduled that for 7am, which was fifteen minutes after sunrise and the formal end of the festival.
Zach untied his backpack from the table leg, where it had been acting as the cashbox for the night. When he tried to lift it he almost fell over. It turned out that nearly 770 Harts weighed a lot. Some of it was in Crowns, but more customers had paid in Chips, putting the total number of coins back up over 800.
For their 22 hours of labor, Zach counted out 44 Harts for Beebee and 66 for Riley and put them in small leather pouches. "Here you go. Thanks again for all your hard work," he said as he held out the bags. "The sun is up and I'm sure you're tired and want some sleep, so I won't keep you any longer."
"You're the one we should be thanking, Zach," Riley said. "This is a lot of money for a day's work. Even the Guard doesn't pay this well unless you're a full-fledged Mage."
Zach smiled. "That may be, but you earned this fair and square. Now get out of here, and be careful on the walk home."
Beebee giggled. "We both live right there," she said, pointing at the massive castle that was directly connected to the gardens.
Zach blinked sleepily. "Oh, I guess I never realized you actually lived in the castle. Oops."
"'Fair and square' and 'oops'? You have some strange sayings, Zach," Riley said. "And you still owe me some slang."
"'Slang'? Is that a naughty thing, Riley? The Princess asked you to rein that in, remember?"
Riley chuckled. "I got the impression that slang just means regional terminology. Is that right, Zach?"
Zach scrunched his face in thought. "Close. What you said is closer to 'lingo'. Slang is really informal and sometimes rude. You probably wouldn't want to use slang around your boss or an authority figure. And yes, a lot of it is naughty."
Beebee smiled smugly up at Riley, not saying anything.
Riley doubled down and said, "Excellent. Then I want you to teach me some really naughty slang." Then before Zach or Beebee could react, she waved and started away towards the non-public gate that connected to the castle.
"I better go too. See you later, Zach!" Beebee said as she skipped off in the same direction.
Jay arrived with his horse and cart shortly after. Zach and Jay worked together to get everything loaded on the cart, then they left the gardens through the main gate. It took another hour to return all the rented equipment and get back to the Hard Fought Rest.
Zach shuffled through the common room, past a few people eating breakfast, and climbed the stairs to his room. He stepped inside, locked the door, then shed his clothes and sat on the bed. He checked that his hefty coin pouch was safe in his backpack and added all his previous money, including the extra Crown he had hidden away the day before. In total, he thought he had just over 800 Harts to his name, a nice increase over the 400 he'd received from Shen.
I did it, he thought, I made it as a merchant in this new world. I've got a real future here.
Satisfied, Zach tied the backpack closed and flopped over onto the bed sheets. The moment his head hit the pillow, he was out like a light and he instantly flipped to Denver.
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