《Iron God》[6] Haode: Dead End Path

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The night was dark and frigid, even with the fire. Haode snapped a stick in his hands and tossed it to the flames. The wind shifted and blew stinging smoke into his eyes. He coughed.

On the other side of the fire pit, his two bodyguards leaned against each other. They were brothers, both in their late teens physically, but like him, they were centuries old. He got up and out of the smoke. “You two all right?” he asked.

They both looked up at him.

“Put your hood up, Dakko,” said Haode.

“I’m not cold,” Dakko insisted. His hand glowed white and ice crystals formed across his skin. “You know I don’t get cold.”

Ido reached around and jolted his brother with a spark of electricity. Dakko yelped and smacked Ido. “Stop that!”

Haode crouched down and glared at them. “Behave yourselves.”

They went dead silent.

Haode settled down with them. “You two seem pretty energetic, considering you asked for a break tonight.” He scratched his bald head. “We could be covering more ground right now.”

“We could,” said Ido. “But you’re the one who needs a break, Haode.”

Dakko extended an icicle from his hand and then smashed it against the ground. “You look really sick.”

Haode looked down. “I feel fine right now.”

“I noticed.” Dakko formed another icicle and played with it. “It’s good to have you back, boss.”

“Call me by my name,” Haode chuckled.

Ido brightened. “Was that a laugh I heard?”

Haode took a deep breath and let himself smile for the first time in ages. A huge weight seemed to vanish from his shoulders. “Things are looking up,” he said. “We’re close. So close to finding that girl.”

“You think so?” Ido asked.

“I know it,” said Haode. “You saw her last night, didn’t you?”

“Never seen any other girl her size with white hair,” said Ido.

Haode looked up at the stars. They were bright and beautiful that night, like a vast gleaming ocean. “She’ll be our salvation. I feel it.”

Dakko let out an icy breath like he’d been holding it for quite a while.

“What’s wrong?” Haode asked.

Dakko clenched his hand and it crackled. “What if Styzia got to her first?”

“No way,” said Ido. “Styzia? Please. They’re not true disciples of the Iron God. Not like us. Can we really even call them Ferash Therall?” He laughed. “We’ll show them what we’re made of.”

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“Don’t be mistaken. They might be idealistic bastards, but they’re nothing trivial.” Haode put his hands on the boys’ shoulders. “They’re very dangerous. Especially the two they call the masters. Avoid them at all costs. Understand?”

“We’re dangerous too.” Ido grinned. “I’m sure we could…”

Haode cut him off with a growl. “Do you understand?”

Ido froze up. He met Haode’s eyes and gave a stiff nod.

“It’s almost like you’re afraid of them,” said Dakko.

Haode’s jaw clenched. “I am afraid of them.”

Dakko looked down and said nothing else.

Haode took a few deep breaths and tried to calm down. He tried to seize back the relief he’d felt a moment ago. It did not return. His heartbeat was a frantic flutter. He clutched his head in both hands. When he exhaled, he heard himself shiver.

“Are you looking ahead?” Ido asked.

Haode shook his head. “Not right now.” He didn’t want to, either. He had once been able to see a myriad of possible futures, endless paths to take through time. Now, though, it was different. It wasn’t a gift anymore, but a horror.

“You might see her,” said Ido.

Yes, Haode thought. That was true. It gave him the courage to look forward for a split second.

What he saw was pure terror. The hungry roar of death shot his ears until all he could hear was a sharp ringing. Or was it his own scream? Haode had no idea. The colossal fangs rushed for him. Caught him. Tore him to shreds.

Haode collapsed in sobs. This was all he ever saw now. Every path was a dead end that led to one point. Death. He clutched his chest and felt his heart pound. With the knowledge that one day his heartbeat would be silenced, a scream tore from his throat. He didn’t want to die. He wasn’t ready. He would never be ready.

He didn’t know how it would happen. Only that it would unless something could change his fate. Something. Or someone. The girl with the white hair sometimes appeared to him amidst the nightmares that would become his reality one day. That small stranger would be his way out, Haode thought. She alone could be his salvation.

Haode forced air back into his lungs. The present swam back into focus. Dakko and Ido held his arms. Their eyes were wide with worry. Haode clenched his hands into tight fists. He bared his teeth and squeezed his eyes shut. Tears spilled down his cheeks.

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“You didn’t see her, did you?” Ido asked.

Ido’s voice startled him so badly that he nearly collapsed. He knew the fear should have subsided by now, but it persisted with a cruel vengeance. Shivers ripped through his muscles. “Of course not!” His voice came out shrill and panicked.

Dakko tried to grab Haode’s hand.

Haode shook them both off and stood up on unsteady legs. “Keep your hands off me,” he snarled.

Dakko looked down. “Sorry, boss.”

Haode paced back and forth. Waves of intense cold and heat surged through him. His nerves were all on fire. Terror writhed like worms in his gut. “I’m never safe,” he said. “I’m never safe, not even with you. I’m going to die, I’m going to die, I…”

“We’ve got your back,” said Ido. “Really. You can rely on us.”

“Can I really, though?” Haode glowered at them. “Maybe you two want me dead and just won’t admit to it.”

Ido stood up and grabbed Haode by the shoulder. “No, boss. We would never. It’s hard to see you like this, but…”

“But what?” Haode jerked back and struck Ido hard enough to leave a mark.

Ido clutched the side of his face. His jaw clenched with pain. “I’m still clinging to that hope that one day we’ll have you back for good. The old you. The real you.”

“Shut up, Ido.” Dakko pulled his knees into his chest and folded into a ball. “Just…stop talking.”

Haode stared at Dakko. The wind blew ashes into the boy’s dark hair. He looked so small and vulnerable. So easy to crush if he lashed out. That gave Haode some strange comfort.

“You’re really suffering, aren’t you, boss?” Dakko didn’t even look up at him. “And I’ve got a feeling there isn’t a damn thing we can do to stop it.”

“And I’m afraid you’re right,” Haode choked. His panic faded into depression. “If what I’ve been seeing is any indication, she’s my only hope left.”

“Then it’s important that she doesn’t fall into Styzia’s hands.” Ido met his eyes with cold determination. “Until dawn, I’ll search for her. You and Dakko stay here. And please, Haode, get some sleep. You need it.”

“Be back by dawn.” Haode clapped Ido on the shoulder. “And don’t die out there.”

“I’ve survived much worse than this cold.” Ido pulled his hood down farther. “I’ll be back before you know it. All right?”

Haode nodded. “See you at dawn, then.”

Ido turned and ran off into the dark woods. He barely made a sound in the snow. Haode breathed a long, heavy sigh and sat down next to Dakko. Dakko looked up at him with weary eyes. “I’m sorry we can’t do more for you.”

“I’m sorry too,” said Haode. “I should be better than this.” His eyelids drooped. He fought to keep himself awake. To sleep was to be vulnerable.

Dakko pointed to the shelter they had made earlier. “Go and rest. I’ll keep watch.”

Haode trembled. He was so exhausted, but he couldn’t convince himself to rest. He fought to stay awake until he lost his battle and crumpled into an uneasy sleep.

Around dawn, he jolted awake to the sound of Ido returning. Haode opened his eyes and saw that Dakko had dragged him to the shelter. Outside, he heard the boys talking, oblivious to him having awoken.

“How are we going to tell him?” Ido sounded distressed. “Dakko, you know what it’ll do to him.”

Haode shifted to hear them better.

“Maybe he’ll be better off now that he’s gotten some sleep,” said Dakko.

“You’re a fool,” said Ido.

“No,” said Dakko. “I’m cautiously optimistic.”

“You’ve seen how bad it’s gotten,” said Ido. “He’s scared and vicious most of the time now. I doubt he’ll handle this news well.”

Haode stiffened. What news could they possibly have?

“Yeah,” said Dakko. “I suppose you’re right. That being said, I think it’s not the end for us. Like you said last night, Styzia might be dangerous, but so are we.”

Haode covered his mouth to stop himself from screaming. Styzia had the girl. Styzia had her. They had taken his sole salvation. All that remained was the dead end where every single path converged and vanished.

No, he corrected himself. This couldn’t be the end. He wouldn’t surrender that easily. He would pry his saving grace from Styzia’s clutches no matter what it took. He had no other choice. There was no way he would let anything – or anyone – deny him his right to live any longer.

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