Ai steeled herself before walking into the goblins room. Breath in. Breath out.

The goblin swung its head round to face her when she entered. Again, it struck her how similar yet different it was to the People.

“I won’t soul bond with you.” The goblins face fell, eyes flattened.

“I won’t tell you what you and your villagers need to know then.” It stated monotone.

Ai swallowed. “But I will be leaving this village when the next season starts.”

“Alone? In the rainy season? You’d be easy prey.” Ai was pretty sure it did the version of a goblin sneer when those words came out its mouth.

“I would not be opposed to having a companion to travel with. I am a stranger in these lands and-”

“You would trust me not to stab you in the back, to be with you night and day yet you won’t trust me enough to name me.” Its eyes narrowed, expression dark.

“I won’t name you because the risks are too high-”

“What is life without risk?”

“however I’m willing to travel with you and help you to find somebody who will make a spirit vow with you. I would make a spirit vow on it.”

The goblin leant back, evaluating her with dark eyes. It opened it mouth, changed its mind, then opened it again.

“It would be somebody of my choosing? Not simply the first drunken fool that we happen to come across.”

Ai nodded. She might actually pull this off.

“And you’d treat me as an equal as we travel. And swear loyalty to me.”

“Loyalty?”

The goblin rolled its eyes. “You’d swear not to kill me, directly or by use of a second medium.”

Snarky isn’t he?

“I would.”

“Then vow it now.” The goblin challenged her, head held high.

“You would have to vow the same to me, except for the naming.”

“I vow by the spirits, that for as long as Ai upholds her vow to me I shall not attempt to take her life through a direct, or indirect manner. I shall treat her as an equal. If this vow is broken by myself, then my soul shall die, but if it is broken by Ai then I shall be released by these binding terms. If it is fulfilled by Ai, I shall be released by these binding terms.” The goblin seemed to blur a little as he spoke. Ai blinked, but the fuzziness didn’t go away until he stopped speaking. The vow wasn’t a joke.

“That’s it?”

“That’s it. Your turn.”

“I, uh, vow by the spirits that as long as…” Ai looked at the goblin. What was she suppose to call it?

“Just say the goblin in front of me.”

“…the goblin in front of me upholds its vow I won’t kill it, directly or indirectly and will treat it as an equal. I will travel with it until I find a person it agrees to soul bind to. If I break this vow then my soul will die, but if the goblin breaks its vow then I’ll be released from this vow without my soul dying. If this vow is fulfilled then I will be released from the binding terms?” The last part sounded more like a question to Ai than a vow, but the goblin wasn’t looking at her like she had done something greviously wrong, so she guessed she hadn’t screwed up. Yet.

She frowned. She wasn’t sure what she expected, but she expected something. There was nothing. No feeling of fulfilment, connection to the spirits or magicy witchy feeling.

She just felt tired, slightly cold and like she could do with taking her weight off her feet.

“Did it work?”

The goblin nodded. “Now we need to shake on it.”

It extended its abnormally long arm to her. Ai hesitated before grasping its hand in her own. Its skin was warm, dry and surprisingly tough.

Suddenly Ai realised that she hadn’t made the goblin vow to answer her questions. A lump grew in ter throat, she was an idiot. Play it off like you didn’t just screw up.

“You’ll answer my questions now?”

“Yes.”

“What are your people like? Is it true you eat the flesh of sentient creatures for strength?” Too late did Ai realise how crude that was. Inwardly she winced.

“To eat the flesh of a sentient creature is to honour it. If I killed you and didn’t eat you, then that would be an insult.”

“Oh.” It still ate people though.

“You’re judging me, I can see it. You cannot judge me in the way of the People. I am not of their blood. Neither are you.”

“I wasn’t-”

“You were.” It states, then continues regardless. “My people, tribe, are not ‘honourable’ people. True strength does not come from the goblin that spares the weak so there is less food for everyone else. Nor from the goblin that insists on fighting every fight fairly, without tricks or games. To fight fairly is to die. Does a beast approach from the front and declare its intentions to eat you?”

Ai shook her head, admitting to herself that she didn’t really want to get scolded again. It was never a pleasant experience.

“A beast is intelligent. It sneaks up on its prey, ambushes it. So we sneak up on our prey and ambush it. By doing so we can take down larger, stronger creatures. Feed more of our young.

“If one goblin doesn’t like another, or they have a disagreement, then they will try to kill one another. It is natural. The fittest survives and consumes the dead goblin, so its meat will not go to waste in the forest, but back into the tribe. It gives strength to find more food, build better weapons. No part is wasted. You throw away your corpses to rot in the ground. They are left, abandoned, shunned. You think that we are terrible to eat the dead, but we think that you are terrible to bury them where they cannot even enter the cycle of life and give food to the prey. It’s one of the worst things that one goblin can do to another.”

Ai was wide eyed. It almost sounded…good to eat your dead when the goblin put it like that. Ai wasn’t going to be eating anybody else any time soon, but she could see where the goblin was coming from.

“If a goblin is strong it is always aware of its surroundings. It is not killed from behind or otherwise. To be killed is to have weakness.”

Ai thought back to the goblin she had killed. The corners of her lips turned down without her knowledge. Calling it weak didn’t sit with her right. It hadn’t even seen the attack coming. Not really. She never gave it a chance.

“But what if it didn’t see the attack coming? What if its attacker was bigger and stronger than it was?”

The goblin gave her another one of those deep, searching looks. It than cocked its head to one side.

“So what?”

Ai ground her jaw.

“It doesn’t make you weak if you don’t see an attack coming. Not if it takes you by surprise, before you’re given time to react.”

“If you are truly strong, then you are never taken off guard.”

“That’s impossible!” Ai threw her hands in the air.

“Yes, it is.” The goblin stated calmly.

“If it’s impossible then why are you saying-”

“I’m not. I’m saying that that’s what our culture says. There is no shame in death, everything that lives dies.”

“I don’t understand. You tell me that the goblin was weak for dying to a stronger pers-opponent then you say that there’s no shame in that.” Ai scowled.

“Why should there be shame in weakness? Some are weak, others are not. Those that are weak die young and fast, those that are strong live long enough to have offspring. They do not live forever. They are not invincible.”

Ai fought the need to clench her fists, all too aware of impaling herself with her claws. She needed a stress ball.

“I don’t think it makes you weak to fall to an attack from behind.” Ai was resolute in her opinion.

“You asked me what they thought and I told you. We don’t have a forgiving tribe. I am smarter than most of the goblins, and that is what has allowed me to survive despite the fact I will never be as strong or as fast as them. I don’t think it’s weak to fall from an attack from behind.” The goblin paused, looking directly at her with its too big eyes. “A goblin died in my tribe a while ago. Strangled. We shared her flesh and made weapons from her bones. She was taken by surprise.”

“Did-did she have children?”

“No.”

“But she had parents.”

The goblins looked slightly confused. “She was born and kept with the rest of the young until she was old enough to look after herself. She didn’t have parents. Not like the villagers have.”

So she was alone. Ai wasn’t sure if that made her feel better or worse. The goblin didn’t have anyone to miss her, that should be a good thing. But Ai didn’t have anyone to miss her either, and she didn’t like to think that that made her life any less important.

“She was honoured in our way. There was no shame in her death.”

Ais vision got blurry. There was shame in Ai. Shame and guilt. Shame that she had killed somebody – somebody who could think and feel just like her. For no reason, Ai hadn’t even waited to see if they were a threat.

Somebody rubbed her arm and Ai flinched away. The goblin. It had been…comforting her?

“I…I’m sorry.”

The goblin gave a smile with slightly too sharp teeth that looked far less comforting than it intended. “You did nothing wrong. There is no need to apologise.”

“I did do something wrong. I…for no reason.”

“Goblins die every day. There will be another to take her place. We all live short, violent lives in the tribe.”

“Goblins don’t die by my hand every day.”

“But they do die by the hand of adventurers. People who turn them in for profit and pleasure. They die to the teeth of wild beasts. To traps. Poison. These goblins are not remembered. You will remember. You have already given her more than she ever expected in death. Her death will change you, perhaps even save others through you. You do not need forgiveness from her or me. You need forgiveness from yourself.”

Ai balled up her fists and rubbed away her tears but they just kept coming. She couldn’t believe she was crying in front of it. She hated crying in front of people. Gulping air, she somehow managed to get her whirlwind of emotions under control.

She swallowed, forcing down any other rising feelings.

“I’ve…got to go. I’ll ask you more tomorrow. About the monster and stuff.”

Ai practically tripped over her own feet to get out of the room. The goblin watched with its large eyes that saw far too much. Behind them, its brain was whirring.