Chapter Nine

Contest

So, where’s Dungeon Conclave this year? Wraith asked as he studied the dwarf reaver as it paced around the false body Wraith had made of Martha.

“Devouring Crags,” Ember replied, “It’s a dungeon that focuses on carnivorous beasts and aberrations, I hear he’s a rank seven dungeon.”

How are dungeon’s ranked? Wraith asked.

“Basically, the highest ranked adventurer you’ve killed. Adventurers get tested by adventuring guilds or kings but that's not important to us; it’s just how they measure the amount of mana they are able to gather in their bodies. Being in dungeons is how adventurers get better at that and its also why we don’t let them stick around we don’t need to let them get overpowered,” Ember described, “they are annoying enough as it is.”

When do we leave for the Conclave? And what do we even do there? Wraith asked.

“Well I don’t know about you but I’m going to fuck as many queens as I possibly can,” Ember said.

Wait, you're going there for what? Wraith asked totally derailed.

“Dungeon conclave is a time when dungeon’s make alliances and enemies and its where all the lord sparks trade soul sparks,” Ember said.

You’re not giving away any of my soul sparks, you haven’t even finished imprinting the new one we got from the dwarf, Wraith informed her.

“No, you don’t understand. It's like a breeding program, I’ll make some deals with some queens from some other low ranked dungeons….” Ember was explaining.

Low ranked dungeon! Wraith exclaimed emphatically.

“Oh, don’t be so sensitive, you egomaniac. You only killed one, rank two, adventurer; even if you did manage to torture him and make him abandoned the teachings of his god and attack one of his friends,” Ember said trying to console me. “Anyway I have sex with as many queens as possible and they keep this soul spark and then next conclave we bang again and I get the next offspring.”

How do you know they’ll keep their word? Wraith asked not even considering the ethical side of this arrangement.

“Because they will want more powerful soul sparks for their dungeons in the future, remember how I told you lord sparks offspring are always more powerful? Well, when two lord sparks have sex our offspring is about as strong as an adventurer,” Ember said.

Does that even matter? Your strength in combat comes from the bodies you're in not from you yourself, Wraith pointed out?

“Not necessarily, your spirits and shadows draw their power directly from our mana and if you make larger creatures only more powerful soul sparks will be able to control them,” Ember said. “Now let's talk about bodies I’m going to need you to create me one with a giant penis.”

Okay first, never say that to me again and second why? your souls you don’t have bodies how will have a body capable of reproducing make a soul? Wraith asked very confused by this whole process.

“Well no, but the feeling of reaching a climax is what triggers our souls to mingle and then produce another soul, it has to do with increasing our emotions and ‘letting the other person it's complicated,” Ember said with a shrug.

Will I be expected to bang other dungeons? Wraith asked concerned.

Ember fell over into the swamp he was laughing so hard. He came up sputtering but still shaking with laughter. “No dungeons can’t reproduce, you just sort of happen, no one knows why. I mean some dungeons might be into it but you all generally don’t get along that well besides you can just order a minion to do you if you want sex,” Ember snickered. “Remember when we first met, and I was surprised when you made me male that’s why some dungeons are just naturally bent that way.”

I needed an advisor, not a spouse, Wraith said giving Ember a mental image of him rolling his eyes. Besides, I don’t like the idea of just ordering someone to give me something, I’d much rather take it.

“That’s kind of fucked up boss,” Ember said giving me a concerned look.

Whatever what do we need for this Conclave? Wraith asked again.

“Well you should bring a variety of samples of things you’ve collected to trade with; make little disks of steel, obsidian or other obscure minerals, seeds of the herbs you’ve collected and lots of small vials of all the potions you’ve collected and copies of spell pages out of that book. You’ll use these to trade with other dungeons for things they have that you don’t.” Ember explained.

“We’ll need to create transportation for you and me and two bodies that will be suitably impressive but not too arrogant or outlandish; we want to make a good and memorable first impression not be isolated for being an arrogant ass-hole. We don’t want to be kobold size for this, I want a living body but you might want to show your skill with the undead. I’ll be there to serve as your bodyguard, so I’ll need weapons and armor, other than that the rest is up to you,” Ember said.

Why will I need a guard I thought fighting wasn’t allowed, Wraith said.

“Because there are always ‘accidents’ I’ve never actually been to Dungeon Conclave but the stories I hear am wild, some ‘rogue monster’ who is ‘totally not controlled by another dungeon’ breaks in and attacks someone before its killed it's always best to be cautious. You will after all, all be dungeons entities who exist literally to kill other things to make themselves more powerful,” Ember warned.

What do you think of this body? Wraith asked. He created a six-and-a-half-foot-tall white scaled creature with a hairless human head with two long black horns coming from either side of his head directly above its ears and curling backward. It had human teeth apart from the fangs. A line of black scales ran down its spin to the tail that ended in a black arrow-shaped blade. The legs were muscled and rippled under the scale covered skin, and yes, he did have a giant penis.

“That’s great boss some good clothes and light armor and I’ll be all set,” Ember said moving into his new body and flexing the muscles.

Wraith created a set of black and red silk pants and tunic with half-plate armor that covered his shoulders and chest as well as the pair of steel greaves and bracers. His sword a long curved serrated blade was carved with runes for the fire spell. A spear of bone tipped with steel hung on his back and a silver necklace enchanted with the skin shifter spell hung around his neck.

Wraith went a different route for his own body. It stood five and a half feet tall and had a bent hunched back, it rippled with smoke from the shadowy form that vailed the bones underneath it and the red eyes glowed with malevolence in the skull. The skin was made entirely out a spiritual smoke that I had learned to create from studying the dark mana of the reaver a beard of smoke blew about in a nonexistent breeze. The body’s shadow moved apart from the creature. I next covered the body with a black silky shadowy robe with a deep hood and carried a bone staff with an obsidian spearhead at the top carved with the draconic runes for my necrotic spell. An obsidian dagger went through a black leather belt at its side.

“How do I look?” Wraith asked his voice coming out smooth and oily.

“Like the ruler of a dark dungeon defiantly,” Ember said with a gulp.

“Good,” Wraith said slowly and smiled revealing a row of perfectly white teeth. He snapped his fingers for effect and created two guard drakes creating with what he hoped were saddles, having never seen them, on their backs. “Only one week tell conclave we’d a better ride. I do so hate being late.”

Summer Conclave

They rode under cover of darkness sealing all the entrances to the dungeon and left Hob in charge since Wraith’s consciousness would be unable to defend it at this time. It took six days to find their way through the forest and onto the plains where there was the scarce cover. He didn’t need to eat but Ember, Bob, and Amy had to stop to hunt now and then.

We arrived in the hill country where Devouring Crags dungeon was and found the path and into the canyon where he lived. Cave openings and tunnels riddled the sides of the canyon, there was a screech and winged humanoid figure descended from the sky and landed in front of them.

“Greetings travelers, what brings you to the crags?” the winged humanoid asked. It was a female, with feathers that covered her breasts in the pursuit of modesty but still flattering her hourglass shape.

“We are here for the Summer Conclave, my lady,” Ember said, “Are you perchance the Queen of this dungeon?”

“I am my lord, you may call me Sythlia, you and your master are welcomed as guests please follow me to the testing area,” she said.

They turned and gave them a pleasant view as she lead them into a cave and down a tunnel. They stepped into a large room with red carpeting and wood paneling with a circle or white marble in the center of the room. The circle of marble was carved with runes filled with gold.

“Please step into the truth circle,” Sythlia said gesturing to the circle of marble.

Ember and Wraith stepped into the circle and turned to face them. “This won’t take much longer, may I inquire your name dungeon?” she asked.

“Wraith Eminence,” Wraith replied.

“Have you ever killed another dungeon or lord spark? Revealed the secret of the existence of your core?”

“No,” Wraith replied and Sythlia nodded as the circle glowed a deep gold.

“Do you promise to have as a guest not harming the environment or ecology of the dungeon or coerce other dungeons through violence while the conclave is in session and a week after the conclave? If you cause any harm to another dungeon’s body do you promise to pay a fair wergild determined by the vote of the other dungeons at the conclave? If a dungeon goes rogue and breaks the law, you will join forces with all the other dungeons to destroy them to preserve the secret of your existence?” She asked firing off each question in rapid succession.

“Yes,” Wraith answered, and the circle glowed a deep gold again.

“Very good,” Sythlia said with a smile, “Please take advantage of any refreshments and the staff has been instructed to indulge your every need,” she said emphasizing the word need and winking at Ember, “please don’t try to open any locked doors and if you have any problems just ask one of the staff to send for me.”

“Thank you, my lady,” Ember said and bowed to her.

The two of them stepped through a pair of gilded double doors into a cavernous ballroom. Humanoid figures wandered about the ballroom, they were covered with fur, scales, slime, leaves, bark, rock mist and everything imaginable. There must have been five hundred figures in the hall and all the while winged women flew about delivering crystal glasses of wine or removed empty platters of food. A chaotic cacophony of noise buzzed about the room.

They descended a white marble staircase covered in a red velvet carpet that lead down into the revelry where people, people in the loosest definition of the word, were eating drinking and humping each other in the corner or pulling each other into side rooms alongside the ballroom as they shed any clothing they were wearing.

“May I take your weapons, my lords,” a servant said coming up to them he had the lower legs of a goat and wore a black doublet, two curled horns sprouted from his brown curly hair and his teeth were set in a smile or razor-sharp teeth. “Its customary, wouldn’t want you to become over intoxicated and accidentally harm or kill someone,” he explained.

“Of course,” Wraith said handing over his spear and daggers and Ember handed over his own weapons.

“Let me know if I can get you anything,” the servant said with a bow and retreating to a side room where he stowed the weapons.

“Go about your business Ember,” Wraith ordered.

“What are you going to be doing,” Ember asked cautiously.

“Mingling,” Wraith replied.

“That can’t be good,” Ember muttered behind Wraith as they stepped into the throng of bodies. People were gathered around tables of food and Wraith stepped over and picked up a chunk of meat on a wooden skewer. He placed it in his mouth and chewed but the taste was dull and flavorless his tongue having no taste buds.

“Made the mistake of not giving yourself taste buds?” someone asked Wraith.

Wraith turned around to see a creature roughly Wraith’s height with blue skin, black eyes and black hair slicked back with oil. His body rippled with muscles and he only wore a pair of white silk pants.

“My name is Ruin of the Djinn,” he said holding out his hand, “I don’t think we’ve met.”

“Wraith Eminence,” Wraith answered taking his proffered hand and shaking it.

“So is this your first conclave?” Ruin asked.

“What gave it away?” Wraith asked.

“The whole impressive get up you got going, everyone’s Lord Spark recommends the same thing. Be impressive make a good impression but what they don’t tell you is that you also want to fit in be able to taste and touch to really enjoy your experience. My first time I had the face of a human on the body of a scorpion everything I ate tasted like acid, but I learned my lesson and never did that again. Remember never choose style over practicality,” he advised waging a stick of cheese at me. “Come on, I’ll introduce you to our peers.”

Wraith followed Ruin through the crowd as he chattered away as he introduced him to other dungeons in their varieties of forms and activities. Wraith noticed people whispering to each other and trading small objects that they hid in pockets about their person. Winged servants kept serving to bring dishes and drinks to their guests or performing errands, tasks or… favors.

“Really, Corrupt?” Ruin asked with disdain looking down on a bloated muscled body whose pats were about his body revealing a bundled of penises like the udder of a cow while winged servants pleasured him with their hands and mouths. “Show some class.”

“What?” Corrupt asked raising a pair of his four arms in perplexion. “I am just taking advantage of our kind host’s offer.” He said.

“Ruin shook his head in disgust and turned away as I followed. “Corrupt Castle is a mixer, you could probably tell by the way he has no class.”

“He doesn’t have a theme?” Wraith asked looking back at the bulky four-armed humanoid with his rainbow-colored hair.

“They like to call it Abstract Dugeonering, but the rest of us call it laziness. Mixers are the most likely to be discovered and need to be killed. There is just no ways adventures can ignore the abnormalities of the dungeon and they end up searching everything breaking walls till they find the core room and then the wild hunt gets called up and the lower ranks like us have to go destroy the dungeon,” Ruin explained as they went to the center of the ballroom.

The center began to clear, and we backed up as ring began to form. A circle of marble rose and a group of figures with robes and gold-trimmed robes and each with an identical golden amulet around their necks.

“What’s going on?” Wraith asked Ruin in a whisper as the crowd silenced.

“The grand competition,” Ruin whispered back everyone is here to see which dungeons have become the first to do something or beaten a previous record,” Ruin whispered back.

“Dungeons and Lords!” A voice boomed out and figured peeled away from the ceiling in the form of a massive green dragon that wings flared out slowing it's descent before it shrank in size scales falling away as it turned into a man with brilliant emerald eyes without pupils and black hair that shone with a green tinge. “I am your host Devouring Crags, I welcome you all to my home!” He shouted extending his arms and the crowd cheered and applause thundered.

“I now begin the start of this conclave’s challenge. I will begin with the first challenge that any dungeon must overcome to kill one first adventurer! Our last winner was….” Devouring continued theatrically but was cut off as a dungeon in a brilliant scarlet robe stepped forward and interrupted the older dungeon.

“By me! I am Screaming Peak, I killed my first adventure by the hand of my lord spark in the final battle in my dungeon where he struck the party’s first ranked wizard with his sword and killed him. I did this in only three-hundred-and-eighty-days beating the old record by fifty days, I challenge anyone to come forward if they can best me,” he said proudly snarling reveling sharpened canines.

“Your pride and arrogance are not appreciated,” Devouring said with contempt looking down on the young dungeon before turning to the crowd. “Please tell me one of you can put this young pup in his place.”

“I can,” Wraith answered stepping forward. “I am Wraith Eminence and I answer the challenge.”

“Impossible I’ve never even seen you at a conclave before,” Screaming interjected.

“There is a simple way to prove this,” Devouring said and clapped his hands a circle of marble rotating up and then turning upside down revealing a circle set with gold. “Step into the truth circle and state your challenge, be warned that any attempt to lie will result in a great deal of pain both physical and mental.”

Wraith stepped forward and into the circle turning my back on the crowd and facing his opponent staring into his grey eyes. “I am Wraith Eminence, on my one-hundred-sixty-eighth-day, I battle a party of second level adventurers and captured a dwarf, a cleric of Zizula. I then held him for a month and broke his mind and caused him to break his vows and be cast out of Zizula’s service. I then killed him by the hand of my lord spark and his spirit was divided and rose again as an undead who remains in my captivity.” Wraith said and the circle flashed gold.

“He speaks the truth!” Devouring shouted and then held out his hand. “I’ll take that,” he ordered and Screaming shakily removed the golden amulet from around his neck and fled the stage into the crowd. “Allow me,” Devouring said with a smile and placed the golden amulet around his neck. “Welcome to the Inner Circle.”