《Everyone Loves Min-maxing》Chapter 8 – Talking Pigs, and Deviation from the Tutorial

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Chapter 8 – Talking Pigs, and Deviation from the Tutorial

Shouts and grunts were coming from every angle as Daniel walked out of the town and into the pig fields. Players were slamming their swords and maces and axes into pigs as if their life depended on it, everyone trying their best to collect five life essence orbs as soon as possible, so they could unlock the portal to the main world and get out of the tutorial.

He saw glimpses of his friends Eric, Felix, and Donovan each struggling with their own level 1 pig adversary.

Squeals and whines from pigs were everywhere, and the long haired highschool girl from before in knee high stockings and a short skirt stepped over the corpse of a freshly slain pig, with a blood stained katana in her right hand. The pig faded into dust, leaving behind a bright yellow life essence orb, which the girl scooped up.

Daniel gripped the sword in his hand and approached a level 1 pig near him. The sallow swine backed away fearfully from the blade, its legs trembling in fear.

He just needed to kill about five of these, and he could get out of the tutorial. Basic logic told him to just hurry it up, and get this over with. But for some reason, he had a nagging suspicion that not all was what it seemed in this deceptively simple tutorial level.

Raising his tutorial provided iron sword, Daniel swung at the level 1 pig. Using a sword was a bit harder than he expected, and he stumbled forwards as the weight of the sword shifted his center of balance away from where it normally was, his feet tripping on the ground.

He felt rather sheepish after regaining his balance, since Daniel prided himself in being rather athletic. This was his first time in his life handling a sword though, so he needed some time to adjust and learn how to handle it.

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The pig was squealing and running in circles, darting a few feet to the left before realizing that there were other players out for its head too. It ran back to the right, and this time Daniel was prepared.

Lunging forward with the tutorial-grade iron sword, Daniel performed a sideways slash and hacked into the pig’s hide. The pig squealed in pain and fell to its side, bleeding.

Daniel hoisted his sword hilt up and then drove the tip of the blade into the pig, grimacing a bit out of squeamishness as the blade sank into the pig’s flesh, piercing its heart as it gave out one last anguished squeal. It waved its arms as if it were asking Daniel to show mercy right before it died.

[You have slain a pig.]

[Pig has dropped 1x Life Essence Orb.]

Daniel bent down and examined the yellow-ish orb in his hand, then glanced back at the village entrance that was at the distance. The tutorial guide faerie was busy yelling at the two highschool girls who still hadn’t chosen a weapon yet at the weapon rack.

Good. She was busy. That meant that Daniel could investigate a bit further– he had a feeling that something about the pigs just didn’t seem quite right. The way the pig that he just killed waved its arms, crossing them, seemed like such an unmistakably human gesture. And what exactly were these life essence orbs that they were tasked to dump into that fire?

Daniel sheathed his sword and strapped it onto his back, then began running towards a pig with his arms outstretched. He wanted to catch one. While everyone else on the map was either killing pigs or talking to other players, Daniel was the lone idiot who wanted to catch one of the level 1 pigs that were supposed to be cannon fodder for the tutorial.

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Lunging forward with his arms outstretched, Daniel caught a porker with a bear hug and clamped his arms around it as it tried to break free, oinking noisily and wriggling to get away.

“Shhh…. I’m not going to hurt you,” Daniel whispered into the pig’s ear. Just seconds after he said that, the pig’s trashing began to die down.

It looked at him wistfully, and Daniel let go of the pig and allowed it to stand on its own two feet. The pig looked at him strangely, tilting its head just a bit.

Daniel felt goosebumps on his arms, as he realized that he was onto something.

“Do you understand me?” he asked.

The pig nodded, blinking its knowing eyes, although it still looked around at all the carnage unfolding as players chased pigs all across the field.

“Let’s go behind that tree, so we can talk in private. Come on, porker.”

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