《The Beginning, The End, And Everything In Between》Chapter 2 [Never Argue With God, He's a Child]
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New chapter! I'm trying to make them longer. Enjoy~
The apparent God seemed amused by the question, and it probably takes a lot to amuse an all-powerful immortal being like him.
"It's not about a rabbit but good question, gold star!" God said in a mocking tone, Emily of course picked up on it but chose not to speak out considering what claims he to be, although she was surprised God could be as bitchy as a teenage girl.
"Better not take the risk of angering God, as fun as it sounds... I remember when I insulted a guy with a God complex and damn it got messy... took me three days to mop up all the blood" Emily thought, she almost smiled just recalling it.
"So what is the purpose of you bringing me here? I haven't done too many bad things for the 'Almighty Ruler' to step in... I hope" [Emily]
"You seem to underestimate yourself, on Earth you are already classified as on of the most dangerous serial killers with your kill count in the thousands and you've only been killing for a year." The apparent God paced around the white room as he spoke.
She held her hand to her cheek while pretending to blush"You flatter me kind sir, but if we are being technical here then it is actually 1403 people, and it was about to be 1404 until someone stepped in" Emily said in a cute voice with a threatening undertone that she saved for the perverts she had hunted a couple of time, right after she graduated college she found a creepy old guy stalking her to the apartment she lived in so she acted innocent and ignorant while bringing him to her apartment while then grabbing her nearest knife and gutting him like a fish, she sighed at the fond memories.
"Well, I haven't brought you here for something as tiring as divine punishment, it is something more fun than that, something you'll like. May I ask, what do you think my personality should be like?" Emily felt odd that God was asking her that question, was he having a mid-life crisis because she certainly wasn't the best option for consultation.
"Ok, firstly I don't remember being friendly enough to be on a first name basis" Emily spoke in an interested tone, she wasn't especially offended, it took a lot to offend someone who doesn't care. "Secondly, you seem almost as psychopathic as me, you lied to your followers gave them false hope that everything will be fine if they spend their life on their knees in worship of you, and 'though shall not kill' but I recall they very brutally killed all kinds of people for petty reasons for you, of course they say that you have a plan and they are going to a better place now but that seems like a white lie to make them think there is something better out there, the funny thing is you don't condone suicide or people turning to another god in hope of a better life after death than the vague idea of Heaven, it's hilarious to watch their faith shrivel up and burn before my eyes"
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"I really can't tell you the inner working of my system but can I say that I didn't lie, I have to say your insight of me is... unique to say the least but that is what I love about psychopaths and sociopaths, the mentally ill in general, you make the world world tick" [God]
"I honestly think me and most psychopaths would be offended by that, we want to make the world rust up and stop working, and we want to sit up on a throne and watch while cheering on the other killers and rapists and sometimes joining in, that's our Heaven, we want pyramids of heads and rivers of blood and thrones of bones" [Emily]
"But you and other like you are attracted to jobs that make the world function as a whole, CEO's, surgeons, police officers, lawyers, reporters, chefs, journalists, salespersons, I never forget to marvel at how my creations fascinate me" [God]
"Well we are a very interesting species, so fun to dissect I must thank you for that" [Emily]
"Indeed, thank me that I created you that way" God beamed, Emily never thought God would be so... childish, and Emily hated children.
"Look, can you just get to the point?" She sighed
"Right *ahem*" the God stopped beaming and put on a serious face. "Currently this isn't the only world I have control over, there is another that is younger than Earth and I built it off the books and shows about fantasy on this world, you could say it is any geeks heaven, In this world there is magic, knights, swords, elves, dwarfs AKA the basics but this world has no one like you Emily, no one chaotic enough or insane enough to cause an unbalance and it is so Me. Damn. Boring. I mean, sure there are criminals but none cruel enough to literally disembowel their father or cut the neighbours dog when they were only 13 like you. So I've decided to give you 5 powers of your choosing and send you there to become whatever you choose and I have hope that it will be as horrifying as it gets."
He finally finished his speech, Emily felt a smile growing, she had read fanatsy books and had always hated the sumoned hero being a good guy with 'morals' and 'a conscience' but now, maybe she could live her own fantasy out.
"Is there a but coming along here?" [Emily]
"But you will start from the beginning and by that I mean you will have to be reborn, but it does mean you will have more time to train your powers" [God]
"...So I will have to be a child" [Emily]
"Yep'' [God]
''Again.." [Emily]
"Yep'' [God]
"GOD NO, DO YOU REALISE HOW ANNOYING BEING A CHILD IS, JUST LOOKING AT CHILDREN MAKES ME WANT TO GOUGE MY OWN EYES OUT RIGHT AFTER RIPPING OUT THEIR TOUNGUES AND HEARTS ALL THEY DO IS CRY AND SHIT AND ACT SELFISH WHILE THE MOTHER THINK ITS ADORABLE'' [Emily]
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"Yeah but... you'll get to kill whoever you want without worrying about the law... considering you are going to probably break it as soon as you are born as well as any common sense people will have" [God]
"Oh really? Sweet! Okee Dokee then" [Emily]
"That easy? Well Emily Reyan, you certainly have the ability to surprise, your dedication to killing is verging onto the levels of inspiring" [God]
She put her hand over her heart and looked to be on the verge of tears, "That warms my hollow husk of a heart" She really did have to thank her family for the actings skills, although it did cost them by losing a few vital organs and a burnt mansion
"Right well enough talking, onto selection, what skills do you want?, I can do almost anything except give you direct power, like making you a god or as soon as your born you are level 9000, well actually I could considering my power level but let's make this interesting. Although anything infinite is impossible to calculate even for a god" [God]
Emily rolled her eyes, although the infinite thing certainly tuned it down but she didn't mind, in fact she agreed with him. After all, where was the fun in killing without some torture beforehand? It's the same process.
"Then I'll have to think carefully..." Emily said thoughtfully "OK got it!, For the first one I want mastery of all weapons, it'll save time." [Emily]
She was already pretty skilled with knives but for her to learn the weapons she had in mind for her grand plans it would take too long. She would be 1000 before she could do anything to make an impact.
"Done" [God]
"Second, I want to be a master of magic, and by that I mean almost infinite power source, affinity to all elements and all magic to me is chant-less." [Emily]
"Well you are pushing it with that request but... it has been a while since I met someone as amusing as you therefore I'll only count it as one power annnndddd done. But be warned, hybrid elements will not show up on your screen but that doesn't mean you don't have them" God gave her a meaningful look.
Emily nodded and thought again, "Now, thirdly I want to level up faster than average, if it was a ratio the speed I should level up compared to others is 1:10..."
"How did you know that in my world there is levelling up?" [God]
"When it was daylight and I couldn't hunt I read novels online and in books, if what you said before about the basics is true then you must have a leveling up system, the books are also where I got the infinite magic and chant-less idea but could't you just read my mind to find this out, after all you seemed to know everything else" [Emily]
"I only know what I saw, I can't watch you 24/7. I just see the important stuff, also I respect peoples privacy enough to not go peeping around the mind, an infinite lifespan is incredibly boring if you know everything so I blocked most of the information coming my way, I added filters" He looked uncomfortable, which made Emily smile even wider.
"Oh, So the Almighty God gets touchy about privacy, hmm I do like him even more now" Emily thought, she licked her lips
"Hehe~ anyway, for the fourth I want a scythe that I can customise anyway I want to." She had always hoped for a weapon
Somehow God felt wary about the laugh at the beginning of her sentence.
"Done but I'll have to put a limit on the scythes power" [God]
"Aww fine, and fifth I want to make my own body and customise it like the scythe" [Emily]
"Sure, it'll make things quite amusing in fact I'll give you the ability to make your own species, not the Divine species like me but I'm sure you can make something just as powerful, so that's all of them, you ready? Good"
Emily felt annoyed he didn't wait for a response but prepared herself for having to go back to a hellish child's body even though she can make it into whatever she wants, she then had a thought.
"You know, you are awfully friendly for a god that is going to send a psychopath to what seems like a perfectly nice world albeit terribly boring" Emily gave him an inquisitive look.
"After you have lived as long as me you will realise the chaos that I want is something more of a necessary evil" [God]
Emily started to feel sleepy'
"I'm sending you off now, you'll be able to customise your new body an scythe then, but goodbye Emily"
"See ya" Emily said in a drowsy voice, but she smiled knowing that she will finally get the killing spree she always wanted.
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