Turned out my artificial vocal cords weren’t built to the same standard as the rest of me. Or rather, there was no standard and my entire body had been built in a fugue state with random parts and very little forethought. The result was that the extreme heat I’d imbued myself with to get that loudmouthed nonce of a lord off my case had given me a whole new voice. One that sounded like I’d had a severe addiction to smoking, drinking, and screaming for a few hundred years. I was kinda digging it, in honesty. Unfortunately, the damage was severe enough that I couldn’t raise my voice beyond a quiet conversational level. I was still testing things out with a few generic vocal exercises when Mia called to me, reappearing on the opposite wall of our cell.

“Sister?” I shut myself up with a nod and waited for her to continue, but all I could think about was how much I really wanted her magic. She could cloak herself to become completely undetectable, which was impressive enough on its own, but it also included a mind-altering component that made people forget she even existed if that’s what she wanted. I couldn’t help but fantasize about how much fun it would be to abuse such a thing, but sadly it seemed to be unique to her. There wasn’t even a structure for me to copy in the first place! Probably because inside that golem body she was a Wraith, a being of pure magic and hunger that had been all that was left after her entire species was obliterated however long ago.

Fortunately she seemed to have figured things out, and it was time for us to go. I had a pretty good idea what had sparked her to finally do something, but I had no idea what it was she’d decided we’d do. Which is why she was in charge. For me, I was just glad we’d be going. I was unutterably bored, and my face had definitely taken the brunt of the blowback for how annoying I’d been. Not that I regretted it in the slightest. It was a lot of fun being a total brat like that, but now I had to deal with the consequences, which was always the worst part. I could feel all the little lacerations opening and closing as I made various expressions, all of which I was keeping hidden under the long fall of my hair. There was no way this face was pretty anymore, and I’d definitely need to cover up the damage. Just like the rest of me. Well, at least I got to accessorize. A hat, maybe. Or a veil.

“Mia is sorry,” she said at last. Not a strong start.

“Bout what?” I asked, wondering if she’d been listening to my lessons at all, since I’d been pretty clear on the utility of apologizing. “You took the time to make a good decision, right?” She nodded unhappily. She was obviously torn up emotionally as much as I’d been torn up physically. It was kinda sweet. “Well then there’s no need for sorry. Better to say thank you instead of sorry,” I told her. Gratitude was supposed to be a healthier alternative to being apologetic all the time, not that I could recall ever being much of either. Not in a very long time, at any rate.

“Mia is thankful to sister for waiting and,” oh wow, she sounded really torn up. I’d need to move this on before she started any waterworks. Though, maybe that kind of thing was a necessary step for heroes? What a pain. “And for being strong in Mia’s place.”

“Well, you’re welcome,” I started, then stopped for a moment since talking was causing a weird tickling sensation that made me want to cough. I cleared my throat slightly and continued. “That’s what companionship is all about; you can rely on me, just like I can rely on you. So long as you remember to be considerate like you’re being now, everything will be okay.” Not awful, but it was vexing that even while being a golem I still had the overpowering urge to cough. “Now, what’s the plan? We leaving?” I’d had so much time to think of plans while waiting that I was itching to use one of them, or at least do something.

“Yes. Mia wants to go back to fun adventures,” she said, somewhat petulantly. For a sinking moment I worried that was her entire rational, and that I’d made a terrible mistake trusting her to become what I needed, but she continued. “The lord man is wrong, but he didn’t listen to anything. Mia wants to try taking his power away and then talking to him, but Mia doesn’t really think that will work since he didn’t really want to talk anyway. He just wanted to be mad.” She really was clever. It absolutely would not work, as reasonable as he seemed to be. He was too hung up on those guards of his I’d gibbed, and their captain who was apparently his sister. Probably could’ve guessed they were related, from the boar-looking heraldry on the guy’s clothes that matched what I could remember of her armor.

Not that it mattered.

“So Mia will tell him ‘no,’ because Mia understands the lord-man’s why now, and it isn’t good enough for what he’s doing. If he wants to fight, then we’ll show him we’re stronger because justice isn’t bloodless.” I had to play that last bit back in my head a few times to believe I’d heard it. I hadn’t taught her that. Had she generated that on her own? Kids grew up surprisingly fast, and Mia was pretty smart, but that was definitely a few steps beyond what I’d been expecting from her. Maybe having an adult body meant she’d grow up faster, or something. Definitely needed to page the big dork about that at some point, in case it signaled trouble.

“I’m proud of you, Mia. Well done.” She practically danced in her restraints at that, which was pretty cute, but reminded me that I’d need to do something about the whole chained-to-the-wall thing. I’d prefer to go for a dramatic magical maneuver, but it had been all I could do to scrounge enough mana for the feats I’d already done. Something about the lord guy’s manor gave it an incredibly low mana density, which was seriously irritating. Couldn’t help that though, so whatever. What was far more irritating was when he showed off his own personal immunity.

Sucker couldn’t avoid getting toasted, though. Ha.

Fortunately for us, they’d opted not to fasten our legs to the wall. Probably because we were significantly oversized for the wall-mounted rings. The upshot to that, beyond the obvious, was that we’d managed to not give away just how heavy we were. They’d obviously been designed in the classic spread-eagle formation that forced most of a prisoner’s weight to hang from their arms, causing breathing difficulty and exhaustion. Nasty piece of work, and indicative of the person in charge. Not that I needed any such indication, nor did Mia need that kind of insight, since she’d already made her decision and I didn’t need to prod her any.

I shifted to put my entire weight behind breaking first one side, then the other, off the wall. Mia’s slack-jawed amazement was immensely rewarding, though it really wasn’t all that impressive since they were made of what was obviously a low-grade cast iron and they weren’t anchored very deeply into the wall. Still, it was nice to be admired and appreciated, so I basked in it while I dusted myself off and then considered how to free my companion. While I could help her do the same, I looked at the now twisted bands of metal dangling from my wrists and thought it might be time to see what sorts of locks the locals were using.

I’d taken a quick peek at the ones in the inn and they were more suggestion than security measure, comprised of little more than a single lever actuating a deadbolt. It was kind of cute, really. Similar locks were the realm of museums and pictures back before, so I was curious to see if the local lord had anything better in his dungeons. I had always enjoyed playing with fiddly things like that, though it had been a very long time since I’d done any real lockpicking. If they were too complex I might have to abandon the idea, but I thought it would be fun to give it a try. First, though, I had to do something about my face.

“Hey Mia, before I let you loose, I want to ask something of you.” Tamping down a kid’s curiosity was a tough thing to do in the best of times, but I had trickery and guile on my side.

“Mia can help!”

“They scratched up my face,” I said, and the need to cough suddenly caught up with me, forcing a few rattling barks from me before I managed to overcome and power through. “So I don’t want you to see it. Can I ask you to keep your eyes closed until I say it’s okay?” Trickery and guile were great and all, but the best thing I could do if I wanted her to become something better than me was to play it completely straight. I had to rely on her being the sort of person who wouldn’t pry when I asked her not to.

“Sister’s face and...” She trailed off, and didn’t say anything more, but seemed to be on the verge of crying with the way her face screwed up. Then she nodded and squeezed her eyes shut. What a good kid.

I started casting around the little cell for anything useful. I actually had a square of something akin to linen that would serve my purposes in one of my pockets, I just didn’t have anything to fasten it with. I only had it because I’d wanted to replace the cloth I’d given to that whatever-her-name-was dwarf girl, and the guards hadn’t bothered to do more than the most basic pat-down. It was cheap linen, too. Even basic muslin was expensive enough to put me off. That had me considering the feasibility of introducing industrial textile manufacturing technologies, until I remembered I could just have the big oaf give me what I needed, which would be way easier.

The cell seemed to be designed to get hosed down from time to time, because it was built so that the whole thing declined towards a grate in one corner. The little lie detector had rolled down that way, so I snagged that and tucked it away in a pocket. The guy had asked lousy questions which was both nice and a little disappointing, since I’d been prepared to talk my way in circles around anything he had. Still, I was certain it could still come in handy and, even if it didn’t, it would make an amusing party trick at least. There were more debris crowded around the drain, and though the rest it was largely just trash, I did find several needles of different sizes. They were bronze, and the grime and stains on them indicated that they had probably been used on some former inmate in a fashion that didn’t bear thinking about.

Without anything more useful to hand I decided to just use the needles to thread my hair into the loosely woven linen and let it drape over my face, which would serve until I could find better. I was sure it looked a little goofy, but that was better than letting Mia see my face, which was the alternative. That was swiftly done, after which I moved over to check on the locks. They soon revealed that no, in fact, the lord guy couldn’t do any better than the inn. Single lever mortise-style on both of the cuffs still dangling from my wrists, which came off with a bare minimum of fussing and bending of the needles to suit my purposes. Frankly it was pretty pathetic. Convenient for me though since, with only a small handful of little bronze needles, I’d be defeated by even the most basic of pin tumblers.

“I’m ready to leave when you are,” I told Mia after the second loud click announced her freedom. She slumped into my arms and kept her head tucked down, resting it on my shoulder. I didn’t particularly mind if she needed me to hold her for a bit, but then I realized I’d forgotten to tell her she could open her eyes. “I’m alright, Mia,” I said, stroking her hair. “You can open your eyes now.”

“Mia thinks sister looks silly,” she said the moment she looked up. I was so nonplussed that I checked out for a bit, staring into nothing until my mind reengaged with reality. It was one thing to know I looked goofy, and another to be told so to my face. I let her go and stalked over to the cell door, trying not to be mad at her, but it was definitely time to vent some frustration, and I began by blasting the thick iron-banded wood with a kick. The locking mechanism crumbled under the weight of my assault and the whole thing slammed open. It had only been a few minutes since the cadre of guards had taken the lord out for treatment, so the lone one remaining was awake and at attention.

He wheeled around to face the broken doorway in shocked surprise, allowing me to lunge forward and grab him by the wrist before rolling him over my back to land with a smash on the floor. He was too stunned to resist as I pulled off his helm and held him down with a knee on his chest and a hand over his mouth. A quick scan showed no other life signs, aside from some vermin in one corner. It was obviously the manor’s cellar, with goods stacked up and sealed casks against the walls, so that was particularly disgusting to see and made me wonder how sanitary the inn was if the lord himself lived this way. The cell where we had been held was the only one of its kind, with the rest of the space used for storage of non-perishable goods. I waited for my companion to emerge before asking the all-important question.

“Should I kill him?” I thought she’d immediately say no, but to my surprise she thought about it for a bit.

“Mia doesn’t want to have to hurt anyone or kill anyone,” she said. I sighed. Noble, yes. Idealistic, yes. She was truly a lovely girl, and I very much needed her to be those things, but not to the cartoonish degree of being ideologically pacifist. Then again, she’d said have to, so perhaps I was jumping to conclusions.

“But if we have to?” I asked.

“Don’t want to,” she mumbled, then shook her head. “If Mia has no other choice, then Mia will.” I nodded vaguely at that. Killing was rarely my last resort, since it so neatly solved problems, while leaving people alive so often caused more problems, but it was her show and I wasn’t going to override her.

“Guarding is his job, isn’t it?” She said, continuing her thought. I agreed with a shrug. “Mia doesn’t think he’s a bad person or doing bad things, and sister already stopped him, so we don’t need to kill him, do we?” She asked, tone heavy but not confused. She was just double checking something she’d already decided, I could tell. I watched the elf’s eyes bulge as he desperately scrabbled at the hand I had over his mouth. Kill him? I could feel all the little pits and fissures carved across my face twist and pull as I grinned. No, we didn’t need to kill him. It was easier if we did, but I was so proud of her for thinking it all through on her own.

“You’re right,” I said, relishing the new grumbly rumble of my voice. It sounded a lot scarier now, to my ear, which I liked. “He doesn’t seem bad, does he? He’s only doing his job. But that job requires that he attack and attempt to kill us. He represents a clear and present threat. Threats,” I said, directly to the struggling man, “should be mitigated.”

“Mia doesn’t know ‘mitigated,” she said. I really loved that she never hesitated to ask that sort of thing, even when it rather defanged the little play I was putting on. That unquenchable curiosity, that drive to know and understand, I truly enjoyed nurturing it. Or maybe I just liked the feeling of superiority? Not that there was a meaningful difference.

“It means to reduce, to diminish. To make smaller and more manageable. In this case I mean that this man poses a danger to us, and we should make our risks as small as possible by removing his ability to harm us.”

“Mia needs to talk to the lord man, and the guard could make that harder. Mia understands. Sister, could you put him in the room and make it so he stays there?” She asked, indicating the cell we’d vacated. It was a completely reasonable way to resolve to the situation we were in, though if we’d been pressed for time that might not have been true. I nodded, gave the man a swat on the head to stun him, and stripped him of his weapons and kit. I used his belt as a gag, but only bothered locking one of his legs before leaving the area behind.

My living gold sight informed me that most of the manor’s staff were split between two areas, an area on the upper floors and a large space somewhere at the back of the house that must have been the servant-quarters-turned-infirmary. That left us free to roam as we pleased, and I very much did please, beginning my search for an alternative to the apparently silly ad hoc veil. Mia might have argued with me that going to see the lord guy was the important thing, but as there were no alarms going off and no special hurry, I just didn’t tell her what I was doing.

I took a look around at the top of the cellar stairs and considered where I could find what I needed. The grand foyer, where we’d entered when we first came to the house, was just down the hall towards the front. I took a wild guess that the areas closer to the back, where that room with the highest concentration of life was, would be mostly workrooms for the staff. While that took me in the opposite direction of where the lord was likely to be, which was something Mia might question, it wasn’t a problem if I just headed off like I knew what I was doing.

As I led Mia towards where I guessed the things I needed might be, I kept the living vision going to avoid any unpleasant surprises. Unfortunately for me, I soon found that doing so came at a surprisingly irritating cost. First it was just eye fatigue, which I thought I could ignore pretty easily, but it became an increasingly nasty ocular migraine that robbed me of sight entirely when I tried to just tough it out. I had to find my way into the nearest room by feel alone to let it clear up. Which is something I suddenly found myself hoping it would do. It would be wildly uncool of me to just go blind in the middle of this mission.

“Mea?”

“Fine,” I said. “Just can’t see at the moment is all.”

“Mia doesn’t think that sounds fine at all!”

“S’no big deal, I just over stressed my eyes,” my laugh turned into a cough. “I’m sure it’ll go away soon.” I had no idea if that was true, or if I’d actually ruined these eyes and would need to get new ones. That would be seriously obnoxious, considering who I’d need to talk to for replacements, so I was pretty relieved when the crystalline shimmer of the migraine hazed back into clarity. “Yeah, it’s fine, I’ll just need to take breaks from time to— wait.” As my vision cleared, I realized where we were, and was a little astounded by it.

“The laundry, hm?” I mumbled to myself. It was more or less exactly where I’d needed to go. A sewing room, a supply closet, the laundry; anything along those lines would have been fine, since there was no telling what kinds of facilities the manor might have. But to get it on my first try? In a room I was going to skip? I knew heroes were concatenations of competence, wisdom, and most of all luck – pure stupid luck – but this was something else. Maybe this whole following-a-hero thing was already working out for me.

Groovy.

“Well,” I started, but immediately had to cough. It was getting harder and harder to speak properly, my voice sticking and rattling like a broken thing. It didn’t exactly hurt, nothing really did anymore, but it got worse the louder I tried to be, so I kept it low. “So long as we’re here, let’s find something to make me look not,” I coughed again, and lowered my voice further. “Not, what did you call it Mia? Silly? Yes. I’d rather not look silly.” She giggled a little but still looked vaguely sad. I thought I might give her a little lesson to take the focus off whatever was bothering her because it was probably something pesky like misplaced guilt.

“It does matter, you know.” She seemed confused by that statement, which I hadn’t intended to leave hanging but I had to take a break for a moment to reassert some control over my voice. It seemed like I couldn’t talk for too long at once, either. “Appearances. You were right about the lord. To talk to him properly, you have to change the power dynamic, and your appearance is one part of the apparatus of power.” I had to take another little break before continuing. “Let’s take this opportunity to make ourselves presentable, shall we?” I finished, gesturing to the room around us.

As she so often did, Mia took what I said very seriously and thought about it for a bit before nodding. I’m sure she intended to be strong and determined but she really just looked sweet and cute instead, like a kid trying too hard. Which she probably was to at least some degree. Though even were that the case, underestimating children was a stupid thing to do as they, like anyone, would rise to the level of challenge they were presented with. Infantilizing her, no matter how cute those bouncing ringlets and that scrunched up nose might be, would do neither of us any favors.

What was doing me favors was the fact that there was a tulle petticoat hung up to dry. I had no idea whose it might have been, but it was about as good a material for my needs as I could ever ask for. I ditched the grungy bronze needles and appropriated sewing supplies from a shelf, which also had spare cloth, thread, and other essentials for keeping a manor’s personnel well accoutered. With that in hand I was able to put an impromptu veil together and attach it to a low crown wide brimmed hat that I’d found; likely from whoever owned the petticoat, opera gloves, and several other bits of dress that were lying around. Perhaps the former property of the much sought-after sister to the lord. The thought was briefly amusing.

“How do I look?” I asked, turning to find Mia wearing some kind of greatcoat that would have looked rather nice — if it had fit. Unfortunately, it didn’t, and wasn’t particularly suited for the kind of impression we needed to make.

“Kinda scary,” she said without a trace of sarcasm.

“Perfect!” I said, and would have meant it if the long gloves weren’t just that little bit too small for me. I’d have to go find a good tailor and get some made, since they would really complete the ensemble. “Now, about that coat.” She picked at the sleeves and looked at me quizzically. “It is nice, but it probably belongs to the lord. Do you think he’ll want to listen to you if you’re wearing his coat?”

“No,” she said, in a small voice.

“Right, probably not.” I had to stop to cough and clear my throat a little before continuing. I motioned her closer, so I didn’t have to be as loud, which seemed easier on me. “The same applies to this hat, but I needed to hide my face in a respectable way,” I’d removed the bows and other frippery from it, but I doubted the guy was going to miss where I’d gotten the hat from. He’d just have to deal with it. “You, on the other hand, just need to clean up a bit. There’ll come a time where we both need very fancy clothing like this,” I said, taking the coat that Mia had removed and setting it aside. “But we’ll have those custom made, and not just take them from someone else’s laundry. Alright?”

“Okay,” she said, nodding obediently. Her docility was definitely a potential problem, and I’d eventually have to find some way to wean her off my influence, or else disabuse her of the notion that I was some great authority to which she had to pay heed. Waiting for teenage rebellion was a risky prospect, if elves even did that at all, because I needed her to become independent for a better reason.

“After this stuff is settled, we’ll go to an armor shop and find you something nice.” I drew her into a half-hug and patted her shoulder since she seemed not at all her usual cheerful self. “You’re an adventurer, after all.” She brightened at that, which was good. I needed her to be confident and upbeat for the confrontation ahead.

There were a few cakes of soap that I immediately appropriated when I spotted them but, despite being a laundry, there weren’t any half-full tubs of sudsy water or anything. I had to settle for brushing off the dust and dirt from both our clothes instead, and for Mia that was enough. The basic adventuring clothes that the idiot had made for us were capable of repairing themselves over time and were very nearly immune to stains. I was still wearing my own set too, but under a nice flowing robe thing I’d picked up to hide the fact that I wasn’t healing anymore. It wasn’t really so nice now though, full of gashes and clinging dust and a vague musty stink from the rough treatment in the cell. I sewed it up as much as I could, but I’d need a new one soon.

“There, you look ready,” I said patting her shoulders after I’d finished brushing out Mia’s hair. I took a brief, very brief, look with my living sight and discovered that the group upstairs had begun to move. I couldn’t be certain the lord was with them, and I didn’t know where they might be going, but if Mia wanted to confront the man it was best if we headed out immediately. I took her by the hand and led us out and back up the hallway we’d come from. Mia noticed.

“Mea, Mea! Didn’t we come from this way already?”

“Yes.” The veil made it a little harder to see details, but I could still make out Mia’s confused expression pretty easily. She was so amusing to tease, but I couldn’t take it too far or she’d lose her usefulness. “Lord is moving, need to intercept.”

“Oh,” she said, plainly understanding what I meant despite the terseness. I didn’t care to be monosyllabic in a general sense, but I was testing out if reducing my word count in that way would be easier on my voice and, to my disappointment, finding that it was. If that was the direction life was taking me, then it wasn’t all bad. That, along with the veil and robes, was likely to increase my air of mystique — which was nothing but benefit so far as I was concerned. I’d always preferred being the tall, dark, and mysterious stranger to dating one.

I put those frivolous thoughts aside as we neared the end of the hall that opened into the foyer where I began hearing voices and footsteps. A quick check with my living sight confirmed that most of the shimmering energies of people had gathered there, with only a few left in the rooms on the second floor. They weren’t in sight from where we were, so I signaled Mia to stop while I ghosted forward to listen in. I very quickly realized I’d never taught her any hand-signaling when she kept plodding along beside me, not minding her footfalls in the least.

“Mia!” I whispered, earning a confused look when I hauled her to a stop. “Group ahead, stay quiet.” There was a lot more I could say on the matter, but between my untrustworthy voice and the need to eavesdrop, I left it at that. She agreed, the shadows of the hall lengthening and deepening of their own accord to hide us.

“—not try and stop me. I have heard you out as I am obliged to do, but see you here what that butcher did to my hands!” That was definitely the lord’s voice, loud and angry. We crept closer until the source of the tirade became clear, the man himself standing in the middle of the foyer, surrounded by guards and serving staff, his hands comically over-bandaged. He was arguing with another man who was, if anything, even better dressed. Perhaps another noble of some sort.

“It is clear that—” The lord’s tirade was interrupted momentarily by the other man, but the lord simply got louder. “It is clear,” the lord repeated, “that that creature is behind the disappearance of my Guard Captain and her force and I will have justice done.” I guided Mia ahead of me, to the very edge of the hallway.

“That’s your cue, Mia,” I rasped into her ear. “I’ll be right behind you, no matter what happens. Do the right thing.” With that I nudged her out into the open, where no simple shadow could hide her nearly ceiling-scraping form. Immediately all eyes turned towards us, the servants scurrying away and the guards drawing blades and advancing in front of their charges. Their respective charges, I realized, noting the differences in their heraldry and coloring.

“Who? No, there were two. There were always two. Why did I—?” He was clearly troubled by Mia’s trick that had made him forget she existed, but took hold of himself quickly. “No matter, both are guilty. Guards,” he waved them forward grandly, despite the fact that they were already in front of him and in no position to see such a thing. “Deal with them.” The four that were in the same red and blue as the lord began to move, while the other guy’s squad stayed back with him. That was good news for Mia, I thought.

“Spare one if it is possible,” the lord said, sounding pretty sure of himself. It was the sort of tone that made me think he might go on to polish his fingernails on his coat, or the like. Not that he did. “I would rather like to find out how they escaped.”

“Now hold one moment there, sir Kuelli,” the other man cut in. “These are most certainly the sirol that His Majesty sent me here in aid of. In his name, we are duty-bound to offer them hospitality and succor.” The guards came to a very sudden halt, caught between orders. It was a development I hadn’t seen coming, but one that made things all the easier for Mia to solve.

“Golden hair,” the man murmured, “You must be Princess Mia?”

“Mia is Mia,” she said, sounding perfectly serious. I cracked a grin that no one else shared. Princess, though. I’d not thought much about it, but she was indeed the daughter of the leader of the sirol, that much was true. That she was recently adopted, or that Kos was only a leader because the duty had been foisted off on him as no one else wanted to deal with it, neither of those things really changed the fact that Mia did hold that a rank of that sort.

“Which must make you Princess Mea,” he continued, moving forward with his guard to approach us. I said nothing. I was simply too speechless. Since Mia and I were supposed to be sisters, I had to concede that it made sense. If only with an incredibly tortured sort of logic under which it was only technically true. But a Princess. Me? That wasn’t the kind of thing I wanted to deal with again in my life. Mia was about as stunned as I was, so I set the whole thing to the side and prodded her into action.

“A princess can be a hero, too,” I whispered. She seemed to focus on that and came back to herself.

“Forgive the rude welcome, I am Orwell, envoy of King Abnell.” He said with a short bow once he’d closed the distance. “I was asked to come here and ensure you were not bothered during your stay, but it seems I was somewhat behind the times. I must apologize on behalf of the township of Venbuelli and Lord Kuelli in particular, I—”

“No!” The lord in question shouted. “I will not apologize to foreign criminals, and I will not apologize to an aurum.” Everyone shifted around a bit at that word. I wasn’t clear what was meant by it, but obviously it was an epithet of some sort. I’d have to keep it in mind, as I’d heard very little to nothing in the way of swears in the language of the Braid.

“Not even from your mouth, envoy Orwell.” The man went on, clearly just getting started. “I have made it more than clear that they are guilty of high crimes, and the magisterial authority vested in me will not be denied by you. ‘Justice under the law is to be carried out without regard to position,’” he said, with the air of a quotation. I surreptitiously brought out the lie detecting device, and moved it into the envoys field of view. He glanced over at the motion and his eyes widened slightly when he realized what it was I held.

“Bad things need to be punished, but punishing the wrong people is worse,” Mia said, with as much conviction as I’d ever heard from anyone. “Mia and sister didn’t do anything wrong, but you sent someone to attack sister because you decided to blame us. I listened to everything and thought about it a lot. You never proved anything, you just decided and then did it. Mia doesn’t think that’s justice.” I was almost moved. Not exactly artful oratory, but a worthy defense of our position and the light had stayed white throughout. I was keeping it positioned so as to be visible by everyone except Mia, who was in front of me, and the lord himself, who was staying behind his men.

“Justice is with the law, and the magistrates. Justice is with me.” The light blinked red. Eyes snapped to the ball, then back to the contenders. I’d been testing the ball back in the cell to find out just how nuanced a lie it could detect. Since there was no chance the ball could detect objective truth, that would have been far too much, the ball instead detected subjective belief in truth and I had been very careful to only say things that I could wholly and unreservedly believe were true. It would seem the lord held a number of doubts about the worthiness of his cause and his actions. Or, at least, he didn’t believe in himself enough to trick the ball.

“Mia thinks justice comes from truth, not from people.” Mm, a bit idealistic. Justice wasn’t an objective concept rooted in reality, it was a subjective construct to help people interact with one another in a more pro-social way. But it sounded nice and might rile the man up enough to dig himself deeper, so I didn’t interfere.

“You were investigated thoroughly,” the lord said, teeth grit and sending glances at the envoy. “And I am satisfied with the evidence I have seen. There can be no one else but you!” The light blinked red again, I almost snickered but managed to keep myself under control.

“Mia is sorry your guards are missing, and sad that your sister, Miss Yizell, is too,” she said, the soft white of the ball’s indicator lending support to her sophistry. “But we didn’t—” The man virtually exploded forward, in slow motion to me but surprising everyone else.

“You dare utter her name, you—” I slid around Mia and caught him, along with the knife he was clumsily holding in both bandaged hands, and pinned him to the floor with a joint lock. The lie ball hit the ground with a ting! a moment later and rolled to a stop nearby. I idly hoped it was undamaged, since it would be useful, but mostly I was disgusted by what an amazing disappointment the guards were. They clearly weren’t trained enough if they were caught out so completely that they still hadn’t moved, but it wasn’t my job to fix that sort of problem so whatever. The lord kept struggling, shrieking about his sister and spitting threats and curses at us, while the rest of the assemblage shook off the sudden violence.

“Princesses,” the envoy tentatively said, “are you well?” Mia nodded, more stoic about the experience than I would have credited. I didn’t bother to respond, since it was a stupid question. To my surprise, when the lord finally began calling for his guards to intervene, not a one of them did. I had to wonder if their loyalty was that lacking, or if there was some other reason. They’d all seen the ball, as unofficial a court as that had been. I recognized some of them from the cell and the questioning that had gone on there, as well. Perhaps they’d simply chosen not to enforce for a liege who was so obviously in the wrong.

Well, not that he was actually wrong about me. Heh.

But if that were the case, and they really had sided with Mia, it would be a very welcome outcome in my opinion. Less fun, maybe, but it was really good for Mia to see that proper conduct led to positive outcomes. That wouldn’t always be so obvious, and in fact rarely was, so having that connection made so plainly, so early in our adventures, was really encouraging. It was also vindication for me personally. I could have my fun slaughtering as many monsters as I wanted, and Mia would make sure that not everything I touched turned to ashes.

“That is well,” the envoy continued. “I must apologize again for this, I was not expecting that he would ever do such a thing, and I thank you both for your forbearance.” He seemed to want to assume control of things, gesturing the guards forward to take the lord from me, but I wasn’t willing to cede anything yet. I shook my head slowly and they all stopped.

“Not done,” I said, my new voice startling the lord’s guards, who’d heard my old one, and causing everyone but Mia to look alarmed. “He has a vendetta. Not justice, personal. Revenge. Can you guarantee he will be,” it was the most dramatic moment for a cough to interrupt me, so of course it did. “Dealt with?” I finished. I’d wanted to elaborate more but, as I marshalled myself to do so, Mia took it up on my behalf.

“He hurt sister.” Mia said, sounding shockingly angry. “Sister’s face and,” she paused for a moment, anger giving way briefly to what, weirdly, seemed like grief, “and her voice too.” I hadn’t seen that sort of intensity from the girl since the Invader incident, when she’d ripped apart most of an acre of rocky woodland fighting the thing while it hunted me. I was somewhat worried she’d shuck that weak shell and come out for real, and that would do no one any good, so I leaned a little more heavily on the man and freed one of my hands to catch one of hers. She gave me a somewhat mournful look, but went back to glaring at the envoy and the lord by turns. Seemed she was determined, but not in danger of losing herself, which was good.

“I am afraid, princesses, that I cannot promise anything. I will need to summon the shadow magistrate herself to investigate this situation.” That sounded delightfully ominous, a reaction only reinforced by the way the lord’s guards seemed utterly cowed by the declaration. “He is certainly not fit for office and I will stake myself upon his forfeiture.” That sounded like he’d have his peerage disclaimed, which was fine and all, but I didn’t consider it a solution.

“What consequences?” I asked.

“For errors of this nature and magnitude, the punishments have included: being sent to the care of extended family, exile, imprisonment, and execution, but I am not in a position where I am able to make guarantees on what the shadow magistrate’s office will decide.” I nodded. He was an envoy, charged with a specific duty and had no powers further than that duty allowed. But while it was a fair position for him to take, that didn’t mean we could simply let things play out.

Unlike the guard outside our cell, with whom the answer was to simply incapacitate him until the situation changed, this man was going to be a continual threat so long as he was free and alive. I would personally prefer his death, as that was generally a fairly difficult hurdle to overcome in seeking revenge, but politics and family were messy and killing him could well invite extended retaliation from sources unknown to us. So long as he was stripped of rank, and a just process by the proper adjudicators which resulted in indefinite detention was carried out, that would satisfy me. But the question was: what did Mia think? What did she want to do? I cast my veiled gaze up at her and waited.

“Mia needs to ask a question,” she said, kneeling down next to me to address my captive. It was a much swifter response than I’d anticipated and carried none of the usual cloud of adorable seriousness. If I hadn’t known the girl, I would have thought she looked positively grim. “Are you going to keep trying to hurt us?”

“You have taken everything from me,” he said through obvious pain, but I could taste the hint of madness on his breath. The sort that would never, could never forgive. That sister of his was important enough to throw everything else away, it seemed. I’d had something like that once, so I understood how dangerous that made him.

“Everything,” he continued, sounding beaten at last, “but my life. What choice do I have but to let you be?” He sounded so very reasonable in that moment, for a man in such straits. Reasonable enough to give up a vendetta, serve whatever his sentence might be. Reasonable enough to keep his life. A sensible and practical man, but for the red light shimmering on the polished stone of the floor. Mia saw it; we all did. All but the lord himself, who was facing the other way.

“Mia asks again, will you come after us?”

“Are you daft?” He began, temper revealed again, but a tweak from me settled him down with an agonized groan. “No, then. I will not. What else must I say before you are satisfied?” The red glow from the device was all that needed saying. I shifted, reaching for his neck to handle matters, when all the shadows in the room twisted and stretched. They slid into one another, growing larger, deeper, becoming more than shadow, becoming an essence of the deep dark found only in lightless water and airless caves. The impenetrable inkiness of the primordial depths, where those that dwell below patiently wait — watchful, hungry, and terrible.

In that moment, Mia was one of them.

“Mia is sad,” she said, genuinely sounding so. “And Mia is sorry.” The soft white glow of the ball was swallowed by the shadows as they reached the last of the distance to slide under the lord. He stiffened, hissed out a breath, then nothing. I let him go and stood, shifting my sight to living gold for a moment to be certain he was dead, then let it fade. There would be consequences from that, but I felt pretty confident that between the two of us, Mia and I could handle whatever might come.