Um. Uh. Mal, maybe we should get going? It's-, well, it's pretty dark outside, and the moon is kinda high, so...

"Nah, nah, it's fine, Villain dear! Don't worry about any of that, here! Have a flagon of mead!" Mal said, shoving his half-emptied pitcher in my direction. At some point, I had gotten off his hat to face him like this, but... it might have been a mistake.

Um, no thank you. I'm not of age yet. No, wait how old are you even-??

Mal pauses for a moment, his swimming eyes focusing for just a single moment. His cheeks are rosy, but not as red as his ears. I wish this was the first time I had seen someone this drunk, but... Chuck takes the cake, again. For some damn reason, Buddy had brought a pair of six-packs with a rate of 10%, which neither Buddy and Chuck realized. Some-damn-how. Long story short, I'm glad I don't drink.

Uncle Peter, you were no inspiration, but you were a precautionary tale I'll never forget.

"-Don't fret, Villain! Intoxicated or not, I can still defeat a rat or two, heheheh!"

-Yeah, right. You seriously don't look like it.

"Yeah, yeah, I don't look it, but, uhh... I haven't quite learnt it by heart yet, but, I do have, in my Life Magic Spell Curse Indoctri... yeah something like that." Mal scratched his head, squinting into the mostly-empty inn. "What was I saying? Oh, yeah, uhh, in that book, I got this spell that detoxifies things and people. It only works on certain toxins, but it worked on Gaston when he drank one too many spoonfuls of brandy, so, uhh..."

And then, Mal faceplanted the table, banging his head on his half-empty plate. Jesus Christ. Alright, let's just get this over with.

Life Magic something something, right? Let's see here... Nobody seems too interested in what's going on here, so nobody notices me climbing into Mal's rucksack. Ooh, there's an apple in here! -It is an apple, right? The colouration is kinda weird, like it's all purple, and it's got these weird swivels on it, but... Anyhoo! Book this, book that... There's a hell of a lot of books.

One of them seems to just be a long list of all spells with a brief description of each, which is... neat? They're all ranked by Basic-Intermediate-Advanced-Master, sorted into categories, all of it.

But I don't really pay it any attention, since it isn't what I'm looking for. Lesseehere, Water Magic, Fire Magic, Life Magic... there it is! A quick peek at the other book ensures that this is, indeed, the only book on the subject of Life Magic. Neato!

Somehow, I've gotten used enough to this body to be able to not only grab the book but also drag it out of the rucksack and onto the table without much effort. It's kind of scary how natural I've gotten at moving in such an odd body, but... Oh, right, Todd had said it's been four months, right-? Since I disappeared, at least. I haven't been here for that long.

...I sure hope Todd remembers to check up on if I exist.

-Enough about that, let's see if we can find that damn spell. I flip open the leather cover and take a look at the table of content. Introduction, Healing, Plant-Based spells... Okay, so, I'm pretty sure the part I'm looking for is in Status Ailment Relief section, right after Plague Spells and before Golems. Neato-,

"-Sir, is everything alright?" an older woman wearing an apron asks as she steps up to the table. Oh, no, I'm alright, thank yo-,

Wait, you mean Mal-?

Our eyes meet. Her brows furrow and she glances at what the hell I'm doing, namely looking at the book. She purses her lips. "Is your master alright?" she asks, grabbing his empty flagon.

I nod. Oh, yes, he's perfectly alright, just a bit out of it, but I'll change that in a moment.

"I'm sure he's quite the handful," she says with a smile, gingerly lifting Mal's head to remove the plate from beneath him. "Give me a call if you'd like any help getting him to his room, will you?"

I nod again, and she walks away from the table, bringing out dirty dishes with her. What a nice lady. I'll make sure to leave her a generous tip (of Mal's money) before we leave. Now, back to the book! Flip flip flip, ah, here we are! Page 257. -I'll just skip all the explanation stuff about usage and all. Drugs, emotion, bleeding... ah, here! Toxins!

Lesser Detoxification Removes lesser toxins from a thing. Works excellently on alcohol!

-Alright, neat! There's also a long, complicated chant listed below, but... I can't really do that. I can't exactly shapeshift right here, and even if I did, saying this all out loud is... it'd be kind of embarrassing, to be honest.

Instead, I'll just try and do it like I've always done it.

I focus in on Mal, let my mana gather, and... Lesser Detoxification!

...

...I don't think that did anything. I didn't lose any mana, so... Yeah, okay, shoot.

-Maybe I need physical contact or something like that? Can't hurt to try, can it?

I scuttle over the book, and head closer to Mal's sleeping form. He reeks of alcohol. What the hell do they put in mead anyways?... Ah, unimportant. I put one of my feetsies on his bare hand. He jumps a little under my touch, but not enough to wake up or anything. Let's see... Take the mana out of me... guide it through my feetsie and into Mal...

-Detoxification!

You have learnt Spell (Detoxification)

-Oh? Ohohoho!

Wait. Isn't it lesser detoxification-? Did I fuck it up??

"Uhhgg..." Mal mumbles, bringing me out of my thoughts. He heaves his heavy head off of the table, tired eyes scanning the table until they fall on... "-GACK,, V-, Villain! How long have you been there??"

No sign of redness, he seems clear in the head enough, so...

Come on, let's go! We've got a sewer to detoxify!

Mal doesn't have any time to object before I hop on top of his hat, excitedly tippy-tapping on the rim of it.

"-H-, hey!"

"You've got a good familiar there, sir," the older woman said, patting him on the back.

"-Huh?? Wh-, wh-, what-?" Mal stuttered back.

One packed rucksack and a hefty tip later and we were outside in the cool night air, readying our spirits to enter the sewers.

"...I never agreed to any of this, you foul-... something."