《Handyman》Chapter 23: Setting the Table
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Chapter 23: Setting the Table
“You must know that would violate proper protocol,” replied Antonius. Grandmaster of Ceremonies is a position that suited Antonius Xiasis well. His father was a powerful eastern earl who controlled most of the seafaring freight in the Empire. Xanopia, his mother, was a daughter of the previous head of the Grand Plains Alliance. As a traditionally nomadic people, the GPA embodied free living and thought nothing of a high-profile daughter running off on her own accord.
Antonius traveled across Mankato as his parents made deals from one content to the next. Sadly, his lot in life was the second son to a second wife, and there was no way his older brothers would afford him a title or position within their father’s business empire. Antonius instead found himself along the path of other capable noble children without inheritance: he created opportunities to prove himself. Ahanu noticed Antonius’s touch in the grand closing parties the Xiasis Firm hosted to foster intercontinental trade. His cosmopolitan upbringing and unique family history made him perfect for overseeing official events in Ahanu’s court. Or so Antonius thought.
“Look we’re doing this with or without you,” scorned Powaw. “The whole point is to catch the Lamians off guard, and that means framing the event outside their expectations.”
“I can see that, but surely His Grace would take care to avoid the appearance of distance from Vindar,” protested Antonius. “Reverting to Axculi customs for formal court proceedings will arm Eastern hardliners. His Grace was never one to so easily incriminate the West in the Imperial Court.”
“Like I said, we will do this without you. I don’t really give a damn about Eastern politics, but that’s why I want Satrap to witness the proceedings personally. We’ll send him straight on to Vindar and he’ll be able to give witness, certify, or whatever the hell you easterners need to do before any hardliners have a chance to react.”
“I remind the chief physician, yet again, that I am not an easterner. No matter though, if you are hell bent on following through, I can only ensure the ceremony’s execution. Ballios, send word the kitchens and slaughter one ram and two sheep in ceremonial dressing. Tanta, clear the inner garden fields and get the chieftain’s tent raised in the center,” ordered Antonius. “Now as you know, I’m not Axculi, and I’ve never actually seen a Wind Passing Ceremony, only read up on them. What do you actually need me to do?”
“First things first. We must control the surprise. I want word out to every servant. Not a word of this ends up in Machayis’s ears beforehand. Anyone questionable gets tasks that keep them far away from the Earl. The Wind Calling must be given by a spirit warrior. Paquine, deliver that food to the eastern anteroom on the guise of bringing it to Kimi to feed her children. Make sure she knows what we’re doing and keeps entertaining the Earl while we set up. We need at least an hour.”
“An hour? We can’t possibly have things ready in time,” began Antonius. Everyone else seemed to acquiesce to Powaw’s control, but Antonius respected official authority above all else. For now that meant Kitchi. “I’ll need to call another shift in just to clear the gardens in half an hour.”
“Listen to Powaw,” ordered Kitchi as he read the room. “The old coot is right, anyway. I’ve only known Marquis Huritt for twenty minutes, and I’m convinced using him this way is our best shot. I’ll make sure our cooks are in the kitchen, so we should be able to start in an hour. The meat is roasted during the ceremony, so we only need dress the sheep properly.” A nod of Kitchi’s head was all it took to send servants flying.
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“What’s more important are the drinks and fruit, as we must have them ready at the start,” continued Powaw. He was annoyed at the interruption. “Set three placements, with each item doubled in each setting. Antonius, you must have seen Luke’s inner inauguration, right?”
“Indeed, I was invited on—“
“Right, the idea is the same here. Our side needs to be set in the back of the tent, raised up three steps, with a fourth empty platform raised above the third level. We have everything built already; I’ve just sent word to the honor bearers to bring it through the gates.”
“Shall I move the Grand Duke’s throne to the fourth—“
“By the gods! You interrupt more than the marquis, and he’s three. Don’t put a damn thing on it. The fourth platform stays empty because Ahanu’s power moves with him, and he’s clearly going to be absent. Now pay attention, because what we need is your eye for presentation. Lay black stones out in two lines to form a triangle with the platform. Don’t place any along the platform, because we’re the ones wronged here. Each side needs jars of water, bitter beer, and wine at each point, so two to a side. Place water closest to the corners, then beer, and then wine. Finally, we need iceberries, fireberries, and as much death fruit as you can find. The spirit warriors will place the bowls; you don’t need to worry about that. Just be sure no one touches the bowls when they pour in the fruit. Got it?”
Antonius wasn’t a fool and finally fell into Powaw’s rhythm. “The death fruit might be a problem. How much do we need? I’m still going to be shorthanded, but I can come up with the stone.”
“Don’t just call in one shift, call in everyone” offered Kitchi. He hoped this could ease Antonius’s mind, and he was painfully aware that Ahanu secretly suspected Antonius as a hidden agent of the Eastern Service. “Damn the labor costs, you understand? Have them clear the entire path from the eastern parlors to the gardens. I don’t want a single pebble out of place. The ones who don’t have anything better to do need get into formal dress, we’ll want them literally lined shoulder to shoulder from the parlor to the People’s tent. Start with any easterners, then any westerners, saving all the true Axculi for the final stretch. We need four death fruit, six or more would be better.”
“Your will, Your Lordship,” replied Antonius as he turned to go.
“Easy there skippy, I’m not done yet,” interjected Powaw. “I want your eyes for the decorations. As many skins, paintings of battles… whatever you can pull out to project power and abundance. No chairs, just as many pillows as you can manage to cover with Axculi weaving. Alsoomose is fond of the traditional styles, so raid her things.“ Powaw paused for a moment to see if Antonius would dare object and smiled when he didn’t. “And get some ghost shoes for our dear young lord here, he’s going to need them.”
“As you wish.” Antonius waited a moment before leaving then parted without another sound.
“So, can I talk now?” asked Talo after the room cleared.
“Oh, he can speak normally,” laughed Kitchi.
“What an unfortunate time for him to learn too,” snickered Powaw as he joined Kitchi’s laughter.
“Right. So I assume both of you know I have no idea what the hell any of this means, or is going to look like? Brother Caloner hasn’t covered this at all.” And it wasn’t in the memory transfer either, thought Talo after sorting the odd memory dump stuck in his brain.
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“I’ll get you up to speed, but first, Caloner, congratulations you just officially become a senior advisor to the ducal household. Go help Kimi keep the Lamians occupied, and be sure you’re announced as a monk and senior advisor when you enter the parlor this time.”
“Got it,” acknowledged Caloner as he crossed his arms. Talo thought this was a salutatory gesture he hadn’t learned until Caloner threw open his hands. Focused jets of green wind flew from each hand, and a trail of ice blue mist traced his feet as he rocked out of the room and down the hallway.
“Kimi must be having a harder time than we thought,” pondered Powaw. “Anyway, now is the time to get your pompous speech into full gear. Boy, have you…. Right, Kitchi, we may say things above your station, and you’re just going to have to bring that up with Ahanu when you get the chance. Discretion, silence on pain of death kind of discretion, is needed.”
“I’ll just leave. It will help to have someone oversee our people anyway.” Kitchi was more surprised at the death threat than insulted. He knew Powaw wouldn’t say things lightly, but still had no idea what sort of secrets one would trust to a toddler. Then again, Hurrit was clearly an anomaly. Kitchi decided to shelf his ponderings on Hurrit as he began broadcasting wind messages down the hall.
The Axculi held a long tradition in wind messaging. Going back to their roots as hunter-gathers, it was a skill that was taught to all children as the main mode of communication outside of a village or camp. Wind messaging consumes far less energy than telepathy but comes with serious downsides. During the first military engagements with the Red Empire, the Axculi discovered it was both slower and easier to intercept than telepathy. Skilled users might manage a whole sentence, but most warriors could only manage one word at a time. GPA tribesmen often struggled with a single phoneme. Ahanu frequently mocked Luke over this, and the archduke was recognized by many as a master of the art. The trick was containing the sound within a wind wave so that it didn’t leak out until the wave struck the recipient.
“Ah! What is that,” exclaimed Talo. He just dodged a bright green light that suddenly flew out of Powaw’s mouth. Powaw waved his hand and the light dissipated as it bounced around the room.
“Stay still and you’ll find out.” Powaw then opened his mouth again and another green beam flew out of his mouth. Talo closed his eyes and braced for impact.
It’s just a form of communication.
Talo opened his eyes and looked around. It seemed as though Powaw whispered in his ear. Then beams of light came one after another.
I could put up a shield like before. There was an odd pause between each sentence. “Seeing” sound travel slower than normal was quite disconcerting to Talo.
But you will need practice in listening.
I will be doing this during the whole ceremony.As will Kitchi.
Even when we don’t have anything to add.
That way Machayis won’t be able to tell
when we actually react to something.
Nod if you understand.
Talo nodded. “Will I be expected to be able to do this?”
No. It’s called wind messaging.
Have you led negotiations before?
“I had plenty of experience on .”
Good. Try to not use words like that for now.
This is much harder to detect than talking.
I want you to go full pompous ass in your speech.
“Hey, I think I’m doing pretty well given the circumstances.”
Do you remember floating as a baby?
Nod.
Can you still do it?
Nod.
How long?
“I don’t know. I haven’t tried to do it until exhaustion. It’s been harder as I’ve grown.”
That’s because you’ve gained mass but not skill.
Your mana well is only marginally improved.
“Again, I’ve been—“
No time. How long? Best guess?
“Half an hour before I would noticeably struggle.”
This time Powaw nodded and cracked a rare smile. He reached into a hip pouch and pulled out two azure crystals.
Take these, carefully hide them on you.
Each one is worth a decade’s wage of a hundred laborers.
Should have enough mana for you to last an hour.
Each. Don’t drain them all the way.
That will break the core.
If returned, we can recharge them.
Try to take a small amount.
Talo closed his eyes and tried to sense the mana around him. He tasted the flavor of the different elements in the air. Mostly he found air mana with bits of water mixed in, but occasional strands of fire mana listed by from the lanterns. Talo focused on the crystals. They tasted like a spoonful of saccharin.
“This won’t be easy.” Talo shuttered as he tried to take some of the mana. He instantly felt full.
Stop there. You need to use it.
Start floating.
Talo concentrated again. Slowly he rose 15cm.
That’s all?
We need three times that.
Talo strained and managed another 30cm.
That will have to do.
“Why in the hell would you do this while trying to negotiate? It’s too damn distracting.”
You just need more practice.
Normally you wouldn’t.
Your great-grandfather was known for it.
It’s intimidating display if you can stay level.
You need to work on that poker face.
This needs to seem easy.
Better. Don’t use the crystals for now.
Will give you a cheap potion before we go.
“Wait, why a cheap one?”
Relatively. There was a knock at the door. Powaw motioned to Talo that he should continue. “Enter.”
A servant silently came into the room and bowed as he offered up a box. Powaw went by the box and pulled out a small black pair of boots. He examined them carefully and nodded. “Dismissed.” The servant exited without even raising his head.
These are called ghost shoes.
They look a little big for you,
but if you put your mana in them
they should shrink a little to your feet.
They will make ghost walking more automatic.
“Hey, why wasn’t I given those before? That’s clearly cut for a kid.”
Because it would make you fat and lazy.
These were made for your great uncle.
Now we know better
than to give these to children.
“But I’m not actually a child, now am I?”
Really? I’m not convinced.
Back to the negations.
The terms are simple.
They acknowledge they have a rebellion.
It’s within their borders.
They are requesting aid to quell it.
They will give us full access to their lands.
They will seal it all in a writ.
And we will give them nothing else.
“Seems straightforward. Can we take them in a fair fight?”
There’s no such thing as a fair fight.
The Empire will crush the rebellion.
The only question is how many must die.
“What would you expect our losses to be?”
We are both sides. That’s not important now.
Need to focus on the ceremony.
Wind mana will be abundant.
Machayis should give a blood offering.
That will be your one chance
to draw mana openly.
Kitchi and I will send you instructions
on the ceremony as we go.
The entrance is simple.
You come in after all the other important players.
Just ghost walk on to the platform.
Gaze at the fourth platform from the floor.
“For how long?”
Don’t worry, we’ll tell you.
I mean it when I say we’ll do this constantly.
From the moment, you make it to the platform.
That’s why it’s all you must remember.
“Well that, a foreign language, how to tread air, keep a game face, which—“
Enough. Don’t split hairs.
There is one thing you should remember above all others.
Remember they kidnapped your mother.
“Right.” Anger crept onto Talo’s face.
That’s it. That’s the game face we need.
Hold that. I don’t say this often,
but I have faith in you.
“Ha, you didn’t really say it this time either.”
Powaw just shook his head.
Come, we need to get you over
to the corner of the gardens
without anyone seeing you.
“You the boss.”
No fool. You are.
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