Hey, look! A chapter-ending where I didn’t pretend like I was dead! I guess I could have tried to convince you I died in my sleep or something, but that is not nearly as cool a way to go as via explosion or giant vortex of death.

But hey, there are more explosions in this chapter so that should be good, right?

----

The majority of the party was soon asleep. The only two remaining awake were Titus and Emilia. And now that Emilia was finally alone, she was freaking out.

I knew that people who went to Comic-Con were a bit weird, but why does it seem like everyone is completely okay with this situation?!

You see, Emilia was not a typical Comic-Con attendee. She had very little interest in comics, video games, anime, or anything even tangentially related to those hobbies. So how did she end up there? The answer was that she was given the ticket and directions to go scout out the new video game technology from her father. Her CEO father, who only cared about the tech that was going to be shown.

She thought back over the conversation that had gotten her into this mess.

“But father, why do you need me to go? I will stick out completely! I know nothing about comics!”

“Blasted girl! Don’t you see? No one has heard of this company before. And when I say that, I mean it! I haven’t been able to find any information about them at all! There’s a good chance this is a joke or a hoax, but if not, I need someone I can trust undeniably to be there to get the information first! That leaves only you since both myself, and my colleagues would stick out even worse than you!”

“Yes, father,” she sighed.

“To help you out, I’ve also hired people to teach you everything you need to know about these strange comic gatherings. Make sure to learn everything you need to before it starts next week.”

“Yes, father.”

Emilia’s next 7 days had been torture. She watched countless anime, was tested on knowledge of tropes, and even had to learn some Japanese words. Overall, she hated it, and she felt like it was a colossal waste of time.

Thankfully, she soon reached the day of comic con. She was slightly surprised when she ended up not needing any of the information that she had been gathering. It turned out that when she got there, basically everyone avoided her.

The reason being her look. A look that suffered from what had been most charitably called a “natural scowl.” She thanked her father’s genes for that one.

So after a disappointing morning, Emilia finally arrived at the presentation from TDL industries. At least it will be over soon. She thought to herself as she prepared to take notes. With actual paper and pencil. She cursed her paranoid father for that one. He was worried about the information leaking if it was taken down electronically in any way.

As the speaker began presenting, she blanched. Ugh. This guy is so dull he might put me to sleep! Regardless, she started taking down basically every word he was saying.

She was busy writing when her train of thought was interrupted by a comment from the guy sitting behind her. I really can’t afford any distractions from the peanut gallery. She affixed her best death glare and unleashed it on the two guys behind her. As one of them shrank into his seat, she thought, I might have overdone it. Oh well, at least it shut him up so I can focus.

She continued taking notes throughout the entire presentation, but she was quite worried since it sounded like a bunch of nonsense. Oh well. Father can’t get angry at me if I just take down exactly everything that was said.

When they got to the live demo, she was shocked. Wait, a live demo with the audience participating? That means they already have a mostly finished product to show! Were they just BSing us earlier with their explanation?

For class and race selection, she didn’t have much of an idea of what to pick. So she just went with the first thing that came to mind. Class? Uh. Rangers use bows, right? I have shot one of those before, so why not? And then for race. Isn’t there an elf Emilia in some anime those nerds mentioned? That will work, I can just say that I was trying to match my name if something comes up.

She then found herself a part of the panicking crowd as she tried to escape the vortex that had appeared, but she was caught just like everyone else.

On entering the new world, just like the rest of us, her first thought was that she was going to be sick, and her second was that her body was in agony. Her third thought was panicked. What on earth is going on? Where am I? And… Why is no one else freaking out?

Emilia swiftly put the pieces together. Unfortunately, not quite in the correct manner. Ah, that must have been the intro to the game. I had heard about virtual reality tech, but I didn’t expect that they would get this far so soon.

And if this is a game, I should have a way to access a character screen or something. She tried to recall her lessons. She started cycling through words. “Character. Status...” She stopped as her information popped up. Yes. We are definitely in a game.

She began fooling around with her inventory when everyone received the message about being transported to another world. Wait. Transported to another world? Oh no! This game is trying to trick these simpletons into thinking this is reality.

It took a bit of messing around in her status, but she finally managed to pull out her bow and an arrow. You see, this can’t be reality because... she slid the tip of the arrow gently across her arm. She winced but noticed there was no blood. In fact, she saw that the area around where she stabbed blurred slightly as she had cut it. You see! No blood, no visible cuts, and the wounds themselves are censored! We have to be playing a game.

She then noticed a group of guys surrounding one poor girl. Hmm. But they might not know this is a game. Maybe I should play along for a bit. She thought for a second. But how can I stop those idiots?

An idea came to mind. That was how Emila ended up being the first person out of 1001 people to damage another player, and how she ended up going with the flow to intimidate people into being more polite to the other girls.

After a stunt like that, I am probably stuck playing this game by myself, but I think it is worth it. It’s not like I am unused to being on my own.

However, Emilia was soon shocked that she got an invite to a party. A party with a [Hero] no less. Wait. What am I supposed to do in this situation? She thought quickly. I know! A tsundora or whatever it’s called. If I act like that, I should still be able to fit in with the group!

So she tried. She did her best to act out like that character archetype. Unfortunately, her only real acting experience was using her death glare to silence corporate directors and acting polite during ritzy parties. In other words, she was failing at her acting, and she knew it.

She was also starting to panic for other reasons. Shouldn’t the game be over by now? I mean, we have been in here for hours, and there is no way that company would be allowed to keep us hooked up overnight. I mean, I don’t think anyone would care to play a game just to simulate sleep when you can get the real thing. Another thought crossed her mind. Wait, I do remember hearing about a trope where the time in the game is sped up compared to reality, but.. I highly doubt they have anything like that yet. The technology just isn’t there. Either way, I need to get out of this game sooner rather than later.

She mulled it over for a bit. I’ve got it! My party seems like they have their heads on straight... Or at least as much as a bunch of complete nerds can in this situation. I will drop the act and then convince them to help me log out tomorrow. With her plan all settled, Emilia finally was able to fall into a somewhat fitful sleep.

----

Unlike Emilia, who was unable to get to sleep because of her introspection, I ended up the opposite.

“Why can’t I fall asleep?” I grumbled. I tossed and turned. I tried counting sheep. I tried not thinking of anything and just laying there. However, I still felt completely wide awake. Eventually, my thoughts wandered over the day. Which shocked me a bit to think about. “All of that happened, and it really has only been a single day?” I muttered.

I got brought to another world. Became a [Demon Lord]. Met a [Hero]. Fought giant ants. And I even died. Huh. I thought back over my death. It still just doesn’t feel real. I mean, I know it happened to me and everything, but I guess without blood the violence just feels less... Real? More gamey?

Aren’t people supposed to be traumatized after near-death experiences? I absentmindedly stared up at the ceiling. I don’t feel traumatized. I feel like I could go back out and fight more ants right now. And mine wasn’t even a near-death experience. I literally died.

Huh. Well, at least it won’t impact me adventuring tomorrow. It would be a bummer if I died one time and then developed a horrible phobia of ants. I would never make it out of here. That pulled my thoughts onto a tangent.

I should probably bring up going home to the party tomorrow. We can’t make too many plans in this tutorial, but maybe I can at least convince people to be on the lookout for a way home now that the excitement should be wearing off a bit.

I sat there staring up at the ceiling for a bit more and then decided that maybe a bath would help me wind down. I quietly opened the door and snuck over to the bathroom to avoid bothering anyone, and then made up a bath. I was slightly miffed to find that it didn’t even feel that hot. Oh well, you can’t expect the tutorial to make everything perfectly comfortable. This is probably way better than the baths we are going to have in whatever fantasy world this tutorial is connected to anyway.

I soaked for a while before calling it good and having the system dry me off. I snuck quietly back into our room and found my bedroom since it was the only one without a light over it. Looking at the light jogged a thought. Wait. Light. I remember that the main room had torches in it, but how has the rest of the cave been lit? I thought back over our adventuring and our fights. We didn’t have torches or anything, right? So shouldn’t it have been dark?

I puzzled over that as I turned the lamp in my room on. A lamp? Has that always been there? I don’t remember a lamp being.. I shuddered and grabbed at my head as a headache suddenly assaulted me.

Ow. That hurt. What was I thinking about? Oh right! The lamp! I thought back and felt a bit silly. Of course, it was there! I even turned it off before I went to the bathroom. Silly me. I thought back over our adventure. And how did I forget Andrew lighting a torch for us during our first venture out? I chuckled. But wait, how did Megan and Emilia scout ahead without a torch? I felt the start of another headache. Oh well, not important. Maybe I will be able to fall asleep now.

I rested my head on my pillow but had no more success than last time. After tossing and turning for about an hour, I finally gave up. If I’m not tired, maybe I can go out and adventure a bit by myself? It’s not like I have anything to lose by dying, right? I also need to get the last hit on kills to get the experience, so I may as well get some practice in.

I snuck out yet again, but this time I was looking for a tunnel to explore. Let’s see, I think it was that one that we went down? I guess I can try it again. I started making my way down the dark tunnel. Oh shoot, I forgot a torch. I guess I can- I paused. Wait. I can tell that it is dark, but I can see just fine? I walked a bit further down the path and confirmed my suspicion.

“Booyah! Something my class is actually good for!” I fist-pumped. “[Dark Vision] for the win!”

I followed the same route that we had the first time and soon enough found the room with 5 giant ants in it. Well, I got here. Now the question is, how do I actually fight these things? I puzzled over it for a bit, then realized. Why am I hesitating? It is five giant ants versus one immortal respawning [Demon Lord]. There can be only one answer!

“LEEERRRROOOYYYY JEEENNNKKKIIIIINNNSSS!” I shouted as I ran up to the closest ant and punched it in the head.

The ant immediately turned and pinched me in the arm.

“Ouch!” Right. I forgot that dying still hurts. This was a bad plan!

I ran away a bit. As the ants all ran at me in a straight line, I came to the start of a plan. I put what I had into action.

I ran away from the ants until they were all basically single-file. Then I punched the lead ant once or twice. That gave me plenty of time to run away again before I was surrounded.

Surprised at the success, I repeated my strategy. Over and over again. And It was working beautifully. My enemies would still land a lucky blow here or there, but I was definitely getting the better of them. At least, I thought I was getting the better of them.

“You ain’t got nuthin’!” I jeered at my silent nemeses as I ran out of range of them for the umpteenth time. And then, I found the issue with my plan. I suddenly found that I couldn’t run anymore.

“Oh right, stamina is a thing.” I turned and looked at the ants that suddenly seemed a lot more menacing. “Mercy?”

The ants swarmed me, forced me onto the ground, and began biting me. They honestly didn’t hurt that bad, so I decided to open my status up and see how much damage they were doing.

“Seriously? You guys only deal one damage to an un-armored opponent?” I asked incredulously. “I guess you are tutorial enemies, it wouldn’t make sense to have anything so weak anywhere else, right?” I didn’t have anything else to do while dying, may as well taunt my barely sentient killers, right? I also was definitely ignoring the fact that I was currently dying to those weak tutorial enemies.

After being chomped on for a bit, I finally died and respawned at the obelisk. “Well, the kiting[1] plan is out.” I snapped my fingers. “Got it. I didn’t embrace the Leeroy mentality enough. Kiting is for non-immortals! This time let’s try a DPS[2] check instead!”

I made my way back to the familiar room. Once again, I charged, but this time instead of running away when I was about to get surrounded, I just stayed in one place and continued pummeling the ant in front of me. It was then I realized the second issue. Am I not doing any damage?

I started keeping track of how many times I hit the same ant, and I focused only on that for the entire fight. The results were downright depressing.

I managed about 50 hits (since I wasn’t keeping track initially) before the ants took me down to 0 HP, and I was unable to continue.

As the ants were nomming on me while I was waiting to get down to -100HP, I asked them out loud, “There’s no way that you guys have 50 HP, right?”

There wasn’t an answer, and then I died.

Resolved to try to get an accurate accounting of HP, I tried the exact same strategy again. This time with counting my attacks. I don’t know if the counting threw off my fighting or what, but I only managed 48 punches before I died again.

Growling my frustration as I respawned at the obelisk, I ran back to the room and tried again. I mixed in a few loops of my kiting strategy before going back to beating on the same ant. My HP was dropping just like before, but I managed it.

“49, 50!” I shouted. Unfortunately, the ant was completely fine. “You’ve got to be kidding me!” I yelled at the simple enemy as I died once again.

I was growing more and more frustrated as I tried over and over again. I had myself convinced that the ants simply must have 100 HP because there was no way that I was doing 0 damage. So I kept aiming for that number.

I hardly noticed that people were starting to exit the dorms as I ran off for the umpteenth time to go fight to my death. I was livid at this point and started screaming various insults at the barely sentient enemies (which the chat filter of course butchered). Somehow, I managed to get up to 99 hits on a single ant before dying, and that pushed me over the top.

I respawned at the obelisk yelling attempts at obscenities and ignoring the looks that I was getting until I heard someone call out. “Hey, Titus-”

“WHAT?” I shouted as I rounded on Garrett.

Then both of us just stood there stunned for a moment. Garrett because he was shocked at the demonic voice that had come out of my throat, and me for a different reason.

System: Demon Lord Form Set - Wrath

Red text is bad! Red text is definitely bad! My concern was enough to shock me out of my spiral of rage. I glanced over at the [Berserker], who seemed to still be trying to figure out why I yelled at him. I apologized, “Sorry, Garrett. Didn’t mean to snap at you. I was trying to see if I could gain some experience, and I was having a... Rough morning. I shouldn’t have taken it out on you.”

Garrett chuckled. “Don’t worry about it, I’ve dealt with hot-heads before. I forgive you.” He clapped me on the shoulder heartily enough that I was fairly certain I took a point of HP damage. “Anyway, the party was wanting to have a meeting. I came out looking for you since you weren’t in your room. Let’s head back, okay?”

I nodded my agreement and followed behind the [Berserker]. We entered our dorm, and I noticed all of the party except Emilia gathered around.

Jake greeted me, “Oh, there you are, Titus! We were wondering where you ran off to. Anyways, we figured we would have a meeting really quick to go over our plans for the day.”

“Good idea. I also had something I wanted to bring up.”

Emilia strode in from her room. “And I have something that I will no longer wait to ask.” She spread her glare across the party, a glare that everyone except Jake shrank back from. “I will admit it was a bit fun playing this game, but overnight is ridiculous. You all will help me log out and get back to real life as soon as possible.”

“Didn’t you see the notification? This isn’t a game. We are actually here now,” Jake responded levelly.

“Preposterous. Which is more likely, that a company has figured out a way to project consciousness into their game, or that there are other worlds out there that happen to be like games?”

“Then how do you explain the vortex?”

Emilia was growing angrier, “Obviously, they put us in before any of that started.”

“And the fact that we can eat, sleep, breathe, feel pain, and even apparently throw up?”

She waved her hand as if to wave the idea away, “Everything that you experience is just from signals to your brain. With enough of a map of the brain, they could have us experience anything and everything they want.”

That shut Jake up for a bit. She raises some pretty good arguments, actually. However, I am pretty sure technology that would work to send signals to people’s brains directly is at least a couple decades out. But, she’s right. Isn’t it more likely that someone cracked that than us actually getting transported to another world?

Jake appeared thoughtful for a bit. “And how do you explain the fact that we have been in here for almost 24 hours now?”

“They have the speed inside the game at a multiple of the speed outside.”

“And why a thousand of us then? And why no log out button or other instructions on how to leave?”

Emilia rolled her eyes, “Can’t you figure it out for yourself? It’s obvious they are doing some type of mass social experiment. Since we didn’t sign any waivers or anything, it is probably an illegal one too.”

“So, to recap your points. You believe it is more likely that virtual reality tech has progressed decades without anyone knowing, that they have managed to speed up this game world compared to our old world, and that they are running a mass social experiment on us. Because of all of that, you want our help logging out.”

“Yes!”

“To your first two points, wouldn’t we have been seeing pieces of that tech hitting the commercial sector long before? Think about it. If there is a way to speed up time inside a game-like world, everyone would want a part of that. Businesses would be trying to leverage that for their desk workers to squeeze more time out of them in a day. Also, virtual reality this realistic would have been a huge hit with gamers without waiting for the speed up technology too.”

That chipped Emilia’s composure a bit. “Okay, fine. Maybe it isn’t sped up. Happy? Maybe they kidnapped all of us and have us hooked up to life support!”

“That is possible, I guess.” Jake conceded the point. “But if they are doing something obviously criminal, why do you think they would let you log out?” Emilia looked slightly panicked at that. Jake continued, “If you remember what the notification said, it said these bodies were now ours ‘for all intents and purposes.’ So, when it comes down to it, we are either in another world, or we are a part of some massive social experiment where they want us to believe we are. Either way, I think it may be best that you play along with it for now.”

And that makes a perfect segue for my topic... I piped up, “At least until we can find a way to go home or to log out.”

Jake looked down at his feet. “Yeah, I guess.”

I then noticed that the rest of the party, excluding Megan and Emilia, was sharing his newfound melancholy. “Uhh. I take it you guys don’t want to log out?”

Andrew was the first to speak up. He glanced down at Tim first before continuing. “When I saw that this world was going to be our new home, I was overjoyed honestly. You see, a few years ago, our family was involved in a car wreck. A car ran a red light and T-boned us.” He paused, and his voice started cracking. “My wife and Tim’s younger sister didn’t make it. Tim... Tim had a spinal injury, and the doctors told him he would never walk again. So,” he gestured at his son, “to be able to see my son up and walking and running was something that I would gladly give that entire old world for.”

Tim looked up at his dad and then hugged him. “It’s okay, dad. I mean, worst comes to worst, and we can just buy the game when it comes out, right?”

Andrew hugged Tim tightly, “I don’t think we will be able to afford it.”

Tim couldn’t see the grimace that was on Andrew’s face, but even an introverted programmer could tell what it meant. Oh.. Can’t afford it. Medical bills. They were probably not well off, were they?

I looked on in sympathy as Andrew turned a newly resolute gaze towards Emilia, “So you may raise some good points about why this has to be a game, but I pray my hardest that you are dead wrong about that.”

Sam was the next to speak. “Yeah! Me too! I mean. We’re in a world of magic and adventure! Who would want to go back to our crummy old world?” Lindsey gave a brief nod. “Also, Lindsey is here with me, so I don’t need any of those other losers back home!”

“And I feel the same way,” Jake said. “And since I am so certain we are in a different world, I am fine with telling you all my tragic backstory in full.” He gave a lopsided grin at that statement. “Or maybe not full. Anyway, to try to keep a very long story short, I was orphaned at a young age. I didn’t have any family, so I went from foster home to foster home. Some of them were good. Some were... Not. I started running away from them.

About ten years ago, on one of my runaway attempts, I met Garrett. I don’t know what went through the big lug's mind, but he decided that he would be willing to adopt me.” I, along with the rest of the party, stared at them both a bit shocked. Jake chuckled, “Yup. From a legal perspective, he is my dad. However, we both agreed that it was a bit weird to have a dad only 12 years older than you, so I always introduce him as my guardian instead.” Jake looked thoughtful for a minute, “To be honest, I don’t have anything else tying me to our old world. I would much rather be a [Hero] saving the day in this one.”

Garrett looked a bit puzzled, “But what about your college degree? Weren’t you just about finished? I thought you were enjoying that!”

Jake winced, “Yeah, I enjoyed my business major for the first couple years, but I was actually starting to loathe it a bit. I was also worried that I was just going to end up hating my job as much as you hated yours.” Garrett looked a bit sheepish. “Yeah, old man, I knew that you hated it. I also knew that you were hiding that for my sake, so I just didn’t say anything. So what about you, you planning on abandoning me to go back to your soul-sucking job?”

Garrett sighed. “Given the choice, I am with Jake. I’ll spare you all the details of my tragic past, but I don’t have any family back home either. And like Jake said, my job was awful, to be frank. It consisted mostly of getting yelled at by upper management for not meeting numbers, getting yelled at by the workers below me for implementing the strategies upper management gave, and getting overworked without any overtime pay.” Garrett looked over at Megan, who was starting to slink away from the group and joked. “I know you are a [Rogue], but no sneaking out of this conversation, okay? What about you? What are your thoughts?”

Megan thought for a second. “Well. I guess I am fine either way.”

Huh. Didn’t expect to find someone neutral on this topic. I was puzzled. As a matter of fact, how is that even possible? Is she just that “go with the flow?” Or does she-

Emilia spoke up and interrupted my internal puzzling. “It’s not like I want this to be a game! A chance to get away from my sociopath father? Yes, please. However, I think it is best to face reality instead of trying to hide from it in a game.”

All eyes turned toward me, and Jake prompted, “What about you, Titus?”

Well, this is awkward. “I would... Rather go home, actually.”

Jake nodded, “I can understand. You got a really rough class, but maybe things will-”

I thrust a finger at him. “No, you don’t understand!” My hand closed into a fist, and I tried to calm down. Why am I so angry? Is this a consequence of that message earlier? After a breath or two, I continued without looking him in the eye. “I have family and friends back home that must be worried sick about me. And I don’t have a tragic backstory. I grew up in a stable family. My dad may have worked a lot, and my older brother and I didn’t have much in common, but we all loved each other. And my mom... My mom is a saint. She was always patient with me and my brother when we were growing up. She found time to both work and also be there for us.”

I paused, and my voice unintentionally picked up a bit of venom. “So, unlike all of you, I don’t have a tragic backstory. I have a family that I want to get back to. And a good job. I’m a programmer. A pretty decent one. So.. First chance to get out of here that we come across, I am taking it.” I ended my tirade.

It felt a bit like I had sucked the air out of the room. Did I really just snap at a bunch of people who just got done telling me about the loved ones they lost? Great job, Titus. Great job. I muttered, “Sorry… Everyone.” The awkward silence was deafening. “I’m gonna.. head to the bathroom really quick. Meet you guys at the obelisk after you eat breakfast.”

I walked out of the room and thought for a second. Maybe I can fit one more try in against those ants. I doubt I will win, but I just want to hit something right now.

-----

Jake was ticked but managed to keep it under control. He practically threw his upbringing in our faces, but I can understand why he was upset. Out of all of us, it sounds like he is the only one that has really lost something coming to this world. Jake looked over at the party. This doesn’t look good, the party may try to kick Titus at this point. I should say something. He thought for a few more seconds before saying, “Well, it sounds like we now have two reasons why we need to find a way home.”

That got some questioning glances, so Jake elaborated. “I mean, we have Emilia’s point. If this does turn out to be just a game, then we should probably get out of here sooner rather than later. And if it is an actual isekai, then we need to get Titus home too. Not saying that I would go with him, but maybe we can at least send him off. Also, I don’t blame him too much. Garrett, if you were left behind, I would probably want to leave too. Or at least find a way to bring you in here instead. Sam and Lindsey, Andrew and Tim, don’t you feel the same way? In a way, isn’t being stuck in here like Titus losing all of his family at once?”

That got a murmur of agreement. “Either way, let’s eat some breakfast and then head out! We have a mob[3] magnet, and so we should hit level five today, easy!”

-----

While the party ate breakfast, I had charged back at the ants. I’m not going to win anyway, so who cares! I gave up counting. I gave up any ideas of trying to kite the ant around. I just focused on punching the ant in front of me as hard as I could.

Right hand, left hand. Right hand, left hand. I directed as much force as I could muster and ignored the ants that had started pinching me in the back and the sides.

I fell into a rhythm and had practically turned my brain off, so no being present was more surprised than I was when I made yet another right-handed swing and hit nothing but air.

I stared stupidly at my fist for a second, and then the empty area in front of me before it dawned on me. I had finally managed to kill one!

“YES!” I shouted and fist-pumped. “Wait, oh no!” I was expecting the ants to call for reinforcements any second, and I cringed as expected the screeching sound to come. After a second or two, I realized the ants had not slowed down on biting me and that I should probably deal with that. “Huh. You don’t call for reinforcements when it is just me, eh?” My silent foes continued biting me, so I took that as a yes.

I went back to fighting, and I tried to get a count of how many hits it took to kill the next one. It took about 23. I was dropped to 0 HP before I could kill another one.

Hmm, I’m pretty sure that the first ant went down way faster than the second one did. Maybe the different enemies have different HPs? Or maybe I was dealing less damage on the second one?

Soon enough, I found myself standing in front of the obelisk again. I turned around and saw the party staring at me. Oops. I did say I would meet them in front of the obelisk, didn’t I?

Jake facepalmed. “Let me guess. You died again, didn’t you? And assuming that you were wrong about there being toilet mimics, I am guessing you went out to fight on your own.”

I didn’t see a point in denying it. “Yep. We determined that I needed last hits, didn’t we? I figured I would get some practice in.”

“How’d it go?”

I almost replied that it went great when I remembered that I had literally killed only 2 ants. That swung my opinion quite a bit, “Not that great. I seem to have trouble dealing damage. I can’t kill the normal ants in a single swing like Garrett can, it takes me more like 20 attacks.” I frowned. “I’m worried that I will never get out of the tutorial at this point.” On hearing that, Jake walked up and socked me in the shoulder. I flinched. “Ow. What was that for?”

“For forgetting you have a party, idiot. It would just be bad manners if we didn’t weaken some of the monsters to let our mob magnet get kills.” He grinned and put an arm around my shoulder. “New gameplan, everyone. We head back to the room with the five ants, and we wound all of them to let Titus pick up the kills. We try to stop them from calling for reinforcements, if possible. If we can’t stop ‘em from calling for help, we hold out as long as we can and then have Titus start kiting the enemies around like our first fight, everyone agreed?”

Garrett had started fake crying, “They grow up so fast. Look at my little guy making strategies all by himself.”

Jake scowled. “Why’d you have to ruin the moment ya geezer? Well, addendum to the plan. If Titus goes down, we feed Garrett to the ants next!”

Garrett got Jake in a headlock and noogied him. “Nope, you should be second since a good captain goes down with the ship!”

After the rough-housing calmed down, we talked strategy. I started us off. “So, if you are planning on weakening enemies for me, do you have any ideas on how much HP they have or do we have a good way to get them low for me?”

Jake answered. “Hmm. They don’t have HP bars or anything, so I’m not really sure.”

“Oh.” I was somewhat thankful that enemy information wasn’t yet another thing that everyone but me had access to. “And your items don’t say how much damage they do in your inventory or anything?”

“Nope, nothing like that. Not unless I missed something major.” Jake looked around at the rest of the party, and they confirmed his story.

“Spells too?” I looked over at the [Sorcerer] for that one.

Sam shrugged. “No damage numbers. The only information it gives is the name, the cost, and the chant.” She looked thoughtful. “I can tell you that the normal ants seemed to take somewhere around 3 [Mage Bolts] to kill, but only a single [Fire Bolt].”

I nodded. “Okay, we can work with this. How many hits did it take everyone to kill one of the normal ants?”

Jake answered first. “Well, I think it used to take at least 2 hits to kill one of them, but I definitely one-shot an ant in the last fight. Might have been picking up [Swordsmanship], or it might have been the level increase. My bet’s on [Swordsmanship].”

“Hmm, so you are probably right on the edge then. If we just knew how much damage you were dealing..”

Garrett looked thoughtful for a second and then answered, “Well, he could attack one of us, and we could see how much HP they lose?” At the stunned looks from the party, he continued. “What? It’s not like it would be a real wound or anything. Just some HP damage. And we have a [Cleric] right here who could heal it up.”

I seized the initiative. While everyone else was still debating, I turned and hit Jake as hard as I could in the chest.

“Ow!” he said more out of shock than pain. “What the heck was that for?” He glared at me.

“Now, how much HP did you lose?” I interrogated him.

Jake took several deep breaths, and his glare softened. “It looks like I only lost 1 HP, but you really should ask before just hitting a party member out of the blue like that.”

“Sorry. Oh, and can I hit you again? I wasn’t done with the test.”

Jake sighed. “Oh, fine. Whatever.”

I hit him again lighter, but still with a decent amount of force. “And now?”

Jake checked his status again and looked surprised. “Oh. No damage.”

“So, I either literally dealt no damage there, or I dealt a fraction, and it just displays the rounded number. Can I keep hitting you like that to check?”

Jake looked slightly uncomfortable but acquiesced. I fell into the same rhythm I had used when I was trying to fight the ants for the first couple of times. “Let me know if I ever do damage!” I started counting once again.

I was on hit 13 when Jake stopped me. “Okay, I think you can stop. You still haven’t damaged me.”

I sighed. “If I only deal 1 damage with a full-strength hit and 0 otherwise, I guess that explains why I couldn’t kill an ant even with 100 punches.” It was about that time that I noticed Lindsey whispering to Sam and Sam snickering. “Comments from the peanut gallery?”

Sam replied, “Oh, she was just critiquing your form.” She paused. “Trust me, you don’t wanna know exactly what she said.”

My anger flared up. “Oh yeah? Think you can do better? Go ahead and hit me!”

Lindsey needed no second prompt. She instantly stowed her shield and sword and walked purposefully towards me. As she got into her stance and started her punch, I finally remembered the fact that Lindsey had the [Martial Arts] skill. A skill that increased damage with unarmed attacks.

I may have made a terrible mistake. I cringed away from her as the blow landed.

I staggered back from the hit. And honestly, it hurt. But not too bad. Nothing at all compared to the obelisk explosion.

“Well?” Jake asked.

I checked my status and was surprised. “Oh. Only 5 damage. I was expecting a lot more than that, to be honest.” I paused as I remembered my HP total. “Though I guess it would only take 19 more hits like that to kill me straight out. Huh.” I then remembered that I still had a somewhat miffed [Knight] standing in front of me. “Sorry for doubting you, Lindsey. In fact, if you have any pointers, they would be appreciated. I bet my stance and how I throw my punches will make a difference in whether I deal damage or not, and as you can tell, I have no experience with fighting at all.”

She seemed somewhat mollified by that and walked back over to whisper to Sam. Sam answered for her, “She said that she would be willing to give you some pointers when we have some downtime.”

I almost nodded and then paused. “Wait, why did she go over to you to tell me that?”

Sam shrugged. “Well, like I mentioned earlier, she is just really shy. She doesn’t really like talking to people, especially ones that she has just met.”

“Ah.” I chuckled. When that got me a curious look, I decided to explain. “I just think it is funny that she finds me intimidating when we just proved conclusively that she could kill me with her bare fists.”

The rest of the party didn’t seem to find it as funny as I did, but Garrett got us back on track. “Well, we know that unarmed attacks seem to deal 1 damage for Titus and 5 for Lindsey. What level of [Martial Arts] does she have, Sam?”

Another quick whisper, and Sam replied, “She says that it is at 5.”

That surprised us. “Wow,” Garrett said. “But still only 5 damage? Hm. I wonder if we are dealing less damage than I thought. Either way, we should get to testing.” He looked thoughtful. “I guess we should check with the lowest damage attack first? That would be [Mage Bolt], right?”

Sam seemed a bit too eager. She levered her wand in my direction and shouted, “[Mage Bolt]!”

I staggered back as the ethereal bolt of force struck me in the chest. “Ow, did you have to test that on me?! I can’t be healed, you know!”

Sam looked a bit chagrined. “Oh. Right. We probably should’ve tested that on someone else. Buuuuut since we didn’t... How much HP did you lose?”

I checked my status. “I’m down to 91 of 100, so your [Mage Bolt] hit me for 4.”

Garrett looked thoughtful and then replied. “So, that means that the ants likely have less than 12 HP, right? Somewhere between 9 and 12? Unless [Mage Bolt] can deal less damage. Maybe shot placement matters? Hey Sam, would you mind hitting me in a few different places to see if the damage changes? Maybe the chest, the head, and then my arm?”

“On it!” Sam said. She pointed her wand at the [Berserker’s] bare chest first. She flushed slightly when she did. However, she shook her head lightly and then cast her spell.

The bolt hit Garrett in the chest, and he barely moved. He paused for a second and checked his status to get exact numbers. “4 damage, go ahead and hit me in the head next.” The next bolt flew. “Also 4 damage. Okay, last one. In the arm.” Another quick pause after that attack hit. “And also 4 damage. So, pretty consistent then.” He turned to Andrew, “Mind giving me a [Heal]?”

The [Cleric] grunted his ascent, and the restorative spell put Garrett back up to full HP.

I started doing the math and muttering. “So, 3 [Mage Bolts] means the ants are definitely between 9 and 12 HP. 1 Garrett swing, 1 Jake swing, or 1 [Fire Bolt] is enough to kill an ant, so they are doing about that much damage per hit. I suppose they could even be over-killing them by a bit, but that doesn’t sound too likely since Jake just started one-shotting them recently. Half of that puts Emilia’s bow shots at between 5 and 6...” I realized my error. “Oh, wait. 2 hits means she has a minimum of 5 but could be doing as much as 11..”

Jake got tired of waiting. “Hey Emilia, just go ahead and shoot me.”

She shrugged. “Okay.” An arrow appeared in her hands. She nocked it and fired.

“Ouch.” Jake frowned. “That hurt quite a bit.” That seemed like it should be quite the understatement since he had an arrow sticking out of his chest. He yanked it out, and I winced for a second before remembering there aren’t any wounds or blood in our new world. He handed the arrow back to her, paused for a second to check his status, and then said. “Looks like 7 HP.”

Then he turned to Garrett. “My turn! Have at thee knave!” He took an exaggerated two-handed swing at Garrett and sliced through him.

“Frick! You little ship!” Garrett shouted. He paused. “10 HP, but now it’s your turn!” Garrett’s eye’s practically glowed with rage. Or I guess, make that [Rage].

Jake took a step back. “I don’t suppose we could talk this out?” The [Berserker] gave no answer but a roar and a savage two-handed swing of his greataxe. “Frick!” The [Berserker] looked like he was about to swing again, but Jake held up his hands and called out. “I give! I give!”

The [Berserker] stood there for a moment confused, and then seemed to come back to himself. “Well, [Rage] is certainly not a fun skill to use,” he muttered. “How much damage did I do, though?”

“Fricken 15. Ow. Let’s never test that again.” He looked over at the [Cleric]. “Mind if I get a [Heal] too now?”

“Wait!” I cut him off. “Maybe we should test natural HP regen? I mean, we don’t know how that works yet. Since Garrett, Jake, and I are all injured now, we can see how long it takes to get back to full.”

Jake gave me a dubious look. “I dunno, man. I don’t like the idea of going out to fight when we aren’t topped off.”

“Well, technically, wasting our [Cleric’s] mana means we wouldn’t be topped off either way since we can convert his MP to HP whenever we want.”

Jake relented. “Alright. Fair point. Well, let’s head out then.”

I turned to follow when Garrett stopped us. “You guys do remember the entire purpose of that exercise, right?”

We both paused for a second before Jake finally had a light bulb go off. “Ohhh. Right. We were going to use that to figure out how much we could damage ants for Titus.”

I nodded along like I had remembered that too, but honestly, I had just gotten too wrapped up in trying to do the math.

We took a bit to actually make some plans for how we were going to handle the upcoming fight. I mentioned how there was a chance that the ants wouldn’t spawn reinforcements when I killed them, and we determined that I would try to kill all but 2 if that was the case so that we could still fight the big wave. We also hashed out how we were going to handle the reinforcements, and then finally to my chagrin, we flushed out the “Lion King” tactic for when, not if, I got in trouble.

Eventually, we wrapped up and were ready to move out. Then I noticed something was missing. “Isn’t one of you going to carry a torch like last time? I found out I have [Dark Vision] and don’t need one, but it is pretty dark without it.”

Everyone paused for a moment before Andrew spoke up. “Yeah, I will. I can’t believe I forgot about doing that.” He chuckled and soon had a lit torch pulled out of his inventory.

“Good catch Titus. If you hadn’t said anything, I would have forgotten we even had one last time,” Jake nodded in agreement.

“We probably don’t need to send out scouts again, either.” At the mention of the scouts, my head started hurting again. How did we send them out with no light again?

“What are you talking about? We didn’t send out any scouts last time. Right?” Jake’s brow furrowed, and then he pinched his nose. “Woah. Random headache outta nowhere.”

“Guess this is why you never spent much time planning, eh?” Garrett jibed.

“Ha ha. Very funny. Either way, let’s just get going.”

We made our way back to the room with the five ants without any further incident. We had all our injured party members check their HP, but unfortunately, none of us had gained any back.

Putting aside our disappointment, Jake had us form up outside the room. He double-checked that everyone remembered our plan, and then we put it into action.

All told, the formation was a strange one. The ranged people were in front, the melees were behind them, and I was in the very back. We ran a little way into the room, and Jake called out orders. “Sam, enemy 1! Tim, enemy 2! Emilia, enemies 3 and 4!”

The backliners, or at least the people who were usually in the backline, called out affirmatives, and the ranged attacks flew. As they struck home, the ants all turned and began charging towards us. As planned, the mages hit their target with 2 [Mage Bolts] each, and Emilia sniped both of her targets once.

“Break out! Gauntlet formation! I’ll take the swing on enemy 5!” At his command, Emilia, Sam, and Tim ran further into the room and spread out. Meanwhile, the rest formed a wide tunnel straight towards me that the ants would have to run down. The ants happily obliged and funneled themselves down it. Jake waited for the last one before taking his swing at it.

Unfortunately, it looks like he forgot to hold back in his excitement.

The ants immediately halted once they noticed their comrade taken down. They began screeching again. Fortunately, Jake’s surprise at his own strength didn’t stop him for long. “Titus! Take out as many as you can while they are calling for help! Frontline! Form the gauntlet back up on the entrance and attack at will! Backline! Focus on any that make it out of the gauntlet!”

We rushed to carry out the orders. I sprinted towards the first enemy. “You’re going down this time!” I shouted as I got in range. The ant lunged at me, but I spun around to its right and punched it twice in the side at full power. I was almost shocked when it died just that easily. Jake definitely had a good idea here, this is so much easier than taking them out by myself. I belatedly remembered and called out, “Confirmed 10 HP!”

Unfortunately, turning to call that out meant that I was distracted. Ants 2 and 3 took advantage of that, and each took a quick nip out of me. I took a step back to get distance and then remembered that I was on a time limit with the reinforcements coming. Throwing caution to the wind, I charged the one on my right and pummeled it as fast as I could. I traded my 2 hits for a bite from the other one of my assailants... Heh... AssailANTs... No, I’m not sorry.

Anyway, I just managed to finish off one when the other remaining ant also reached me, leaving it still at a two versus one situation.

I spared a quick glance at the entrance where the reinforcements were pouring in. And the party was doing work. Garrett was killing ants with single broad swings, Lindsey was taking them down with 2 precise sword strikes, Andrew was swinging his club at targets methodically, and what Jake lacked in form he made up 10-fold with enthusiasm. Our ranged party members were also on point. Any ant that made it past the gauntlet was welcomed with an arrow or a [Mage Bolt] to the face, sometimes both.

And then there was Megan. Who would intermittently give a halfhearted jab at the ant that was nearest to her. I watched her for a couple seconds and didn’t see her land a single hit. Oh come on, I know you aren’t in danger, and I respawn, but couldn’t you at least pretend like you care if I live or die? After taking yet another bite on the arm for being distracted, I finally focused down the two enemies in turn.

That was when I heard the screeching again. “We got reinforcements from the other tunnel!” I turned and shouted at Jake’s group.

Jake noticed that the reinforcements coming from the entrance they were watching were dwindling down. “Backline! Change your focus to whichever ant you can hit that is nearest Titus! Lindsey, you’re with me! We’ll thin them out at the other entrance! Titus, start kiting!”

Jake and Lindsey took off towards the opposite entrance. Since they had a steady stream of ants running past them, they also took that opportunity to hack and slash at them as they were getting into position. Meanwhile, I felt pretty calm about the whole thing as I now had consistent ranged support that was taking out basically every ant that was getting close.

“I think I am good here for a second, I’m going to try to get some more XP before kiting!” I called out to Jake.

“Okay, but be careful!” He shouted back between swings.

One ant finally reached me, but since Emilia had already shot it, it went down in a flurry of 3 blows. Two more ants reached me right after, but one was staggered by a [Mage Bolt], and the other died to a [Mage Bolt] and an arrow. “WOOO!” I shouted in glee as I dusted the wounded ant with another bout of fisticuffs. It was exhilarating to actually feel like I was useful, even if I was still pretty much just leaching XP off of the party.

It was steadily getting dicier as Jake and Lindsey couldn’t keep up with the reinforcements, and fire ants were also starting to show up too. First, it was 2 wounded ants fighting me, then it was 3. Then 3 ants that were barely scratched. Then 2 normal ants and 1 fire ant. I had managed to take down 3 of them, and the backline had taken out the others near me when I heard more screeching come from the tunnel that Garret was guarding.

“We got more reinforcements coming, Titus! Make a run for it!” Garrett called out to me.

Not yet. “I’ll start kiting after one more!” I was nearly surrounded, but I was so close to 10 kills, I just had one wounded ant left to finish off! I swung a haymaker as hard as I could at my last foe and was rewarded with it fading to smoke. Now to get out of here! I grinned triumphantly and tried to take off at a sprint in the direction of my one remaining gap in the ants.

Except I didn’t move.

System: You are grappled and cannot move

In a panic, I looked behind me and saw that one ant had decided to latch on instead of attacking. “I’m grappled!” I shouted and began awkwardly trying to hit the ant that was behind me.

“Fudge!” I could almost hear Jake’s internal facepalm as he tried to swear. “Everyone break a hole through to Titus! If you have any special spells or skills, now is the time!” Jake led the way. “[Power Strike]!” His leaping strike instantly killed a fire ant from nearly full health, but he shouted after that. “It has a frickin minute cooldown!”

Fortunately, our other party members had some skills that proved to be more helpful.

“[Rage]!” Garrett shouted. He then began screaming like a madman as he swung his greataxe through multiple ants at a time.

“[Quick Cast]!” Sam followed along and then paused for a second before casting. “[Fire Bolt]! [Fire Bolt]!” She was churning them out as fast as she had been with [Mage Bolt], and everywhere she shot a normal ant died.

While the rest of the party was doing their best to save me, I was stuck in an endless chain of grapples. One ant would clamp down on me, it would finally die, and then another would just clamp down right after. Even worse, the fire ants were on me now, and they were adding their fire breath to my misery. Great, there’s no way I am getting out of this. I sighed and prepared for yet another respawn at the obelisk.

----

Tim was having fun blowing up the mean ants that were assailing his companion Titus. Then a lot of the ants got through, and soon Titus was unable to breach the encirclement. Jake called out what to do, so Tim also began planning what brilliant stratagem he would employ.

Like big sis Sam, Tim had also acquired the [Fire Bolt] spell, but unlike his compatriot, he was in ownership of the skill [Overchannel] instead of [Quick Cast]. “I bet it makes it bigger, but where should I place the spell in order to ensure maximum efficacy of its wide-range nature?” He frowned when an idea came to him. “Got it! Only one good guy and a high density of adversaries!”

He started with his skill. “[Overchannel]!” Right after, he incanted the necessary words to invoke the [Fire Bolt] spell. “Fire strike my foes. [Fire Bolt]!” Unlike regular spells, this time Tim could feel that he was able to supply the spell with as much additional mana as he wished to. He added it all. The bolt of fire stopped in front of his wand and began enlarging. When he ran out of mana, he took aim at his target and loosed the spell.

The enlarged bolt flew and was a direct hit.

----

When I heard the overexcited eight-year-old cast a spell and saw how much he put into it, I thought for a second that I would make it out easy-peasy. Only for a second. Wait, where can he shoot that thing without hitting anyone with the AOE? My silent question was answered when the bolt streaked straight towards me.

Well, I gotta give it to him. Even if it is a team-kill, it is probably the fastest way to kill all these ants. I sighed, and the bolt hit me center mass.

Then, my entire world was bathed in flames. I screamed. The heat! It was not actually that hot. The pain! I wasn’t experiencing any. This is the end! It was... you get the idea.

When I was done taking my imagined damage, I finally opened my eyes. Wait. Shouldn’t I be back at the obelisk? I looked around me and realized that the attack was actually much less impressive than I thought. Every ant within 5 feet of me had been killed except for the fire ants, and I finally realized that it hadn’t hurt me at all. The party, including me, stood there shocked for a moment.

Unfortunately, there were still several ants of both types attacking me. Unfortunately for them, Garrett wasn’t shocked like the rest of the party since he was still in a mindless [Rage]. He chewed through them in a heartbeat (not literally though I wouldn’t put it past a [Raging] [Berserker] to try).

Looking across the room, my eyes locked onto Tim, who was avoiding eye contact at all costs. I slowly walked across the room towards him. Andrew quickly got in between us. “I’m sure he’s sorry and didn’t mean it. Please forgive him.”

He was stalled by the look in my eyes and a monotone, “Please let me speak with him.”

Andrew’s argument died on his lips. When I reached Tim, I put my hands on his shoulders and said, “Look at me.” He looked up at me with fear in his eyes.

The rest of the party turned away as they didn’t want to see what was about to occur.

“THAT.” Tim started sniffling. “WAS.” Tim cringed and backed away from me, and Andrew began to protest again. “AWESOME!” The entire room was stunned except for one [Demon Lord], who was suddenly very energetic.

“So that was [Overchannel]? Any ideas on the cooldown? How much mana does it take? Oh! I know! We leave as many normal ants up as possible, and then I get them in one small spot around me...”

I continued chatting excitedly to the confused child [Wizard] while the party started planning what to do next. The unanimous vote was to head back for a bit and take a break after whatever the heck that fight was.

[1] Kiting is a term referring to a method of killing enemies by staying at a distance, using ranged attacks, and running whenever the enemy comes near. By that definition it technically can’t be done with melee, but any strategy that ends up with the enemy spending more time running after you than fighting is usually counted.

[2] DPS stands for Damage Per Second. Fights are said to be a “DPS Check” if they are essentially reduced to “who can do more damage faster.” Fights like this usually have little to no focus on defense.

[3] Mob is another term for enemy monsters that you find in most video games