As the strange sensations started to fade, Puck noticed a veritable sheaf of scrolls at the edge of his consciousness. He concentrated on the first and they all came rushing to the fore. The first four scrolls said just about the same thing.

You have leveled up. You are now Level 2. You have new abilities to choose from. Would you like to choose them now?

You have leveled up. You are now Level 3. You have new abilities to choose from. Would you like to choose them now?

You have leveled up. You are now Level 4. You have new abilities to choose from. Would you like to choose them now?

You have leveled up. You are now Level 5. You have new abilities to choose from. Would you like to choose them now?

Puck wondered who in the name of Oberon was in charge of this horseshit. It was seriously obnoxious. He assumed each scroll was related to one of the surges he had experienced. It explained why there were so many, and what they were. It must have somehow been related to adding a dungeon pixie to the universal dungeon catalog, whatever that was. With that thought, the edge of yet another scroll appeared at the bottom of the stack and he growled aloud. Irritated with bureaucracy of it, he begrudgingly answered affirmative to the question in the last of the level up scrolls. A new one unfurled in its place. Considering that Puck had seen the text change on a single scroll, he suspected the presentation was intentional.

Please choose one Level 2 ability or two Level 1 abilities.

Level 1:

Influence I - Improves the rate your influence spreads through the earth surrounding your core and lowers mana/sq.ft costs.

Environment I - Gain improved control over physical environment under your influence.

Summons I - Your summoned fauna are stronger and healthier.

Arborea I - The flora you grow are more resilient, and alchemical ingredients are more potent.

Lootcraft I - Treasure you create is better quality with improved value.

Level 2:

Creature Crafting I - Modify summoned creatures’ physical traits.

Summon Abilities I - Grant one type of your summoned fauna a Level 1 ability from the Dungeon Fauna Ability Guide. Can be taken more than once for different summons or additional abilities.

Improved Metawell I - Improves your mana capacity and passive recovery, as well as the amount of mana gained from absorbing flora and fauna.

Traps I (requires Environment I) - Your traps are more effective and harder to detect or disarm.

Living Forest I - You can modify your flora and grant animated life to new species you create.

Puck read through the options once and immediately selected Improved Metawell I. In spite of his awareness reaching into a few yards into the earth surrounding his cave and dwarven tomb/evil mage lair, he still thought of his -self- as being made up of the sprite form and nothing else. If the metawell and mana were part of the sense of power that lead to the pixie’s consumption, he wanted as much as he could get. A prompt on the scroll asked for confirmation and once given, congratulated him on his new ability. He immediately felt the ‘well’ inside his consciousness deepen, and a steady trickle of mana begin to pour in. It would take quite a while at the rate it was flowing for it to give him a sensation of fullness.

The next scroll unfurled and interrupted his thoughts. This one began:

Please choose one Level 3 ability, two Level 2 abilities, three Level 1 abilities, or improve a Level 1 ability, (i.e. Influence I to Influence II).

Without hesitation or bothering to read any of the Level 3 abilities the dungeon sprite concentrated on improving his Illusion I ability.

You would like to improve Illusion I to Illusion II. This decision is final. Yes/No?

He nodded yes. New text was added to the scroll.

Congratulations. You now have the Illusion II ability. Your spells can now affect multiple beings so that they all share the same hallucination.

P.S. I hope you know what you’re doing. Most dungeons agonize for hours, if not days or weeks over their leveling path. And they usually choose something a little more practical.

Puck growled at the extra commentary and dismissed the scroll. Before the next could take up his vision, he felt footsteps brush the edge of his awareness like fingers walking heavily across skin. There were multiple footsteps grouped closely together, so it was impossible for him to determine how many were in the group. When he attempted to bring his awareness to the unknown presence, nothing happened. His vision was apparently limited to the presence of his semi-corporeal form, but he could still feel the invaders with each step they took. His brow furrowed and he willed himself into the tunnel.

The dungeon’s spirit floated among the stalactites of his entryway, looking down on a quartet of short, green-grey skinned humanoids. Goblins, Puck thought to himself. Vermin. Nearly as bad as gnomes. He was certain that if he let them settle in, they would breed like rabbits and smell the place up worse than dwarves. Once they had made a home in his lair he would never be able to get rid of them. With only a little over a half mile of cavern, he would have to do so quickly. He peered closer as they shuffled slowly down the slope toward his main room. One of the goblins trailed a little behind the others, and seemed to be wounded. A shallow cut that looked like a sword wound on the deltoid of its right arm slowly oozed red blood. Its left hand was pressed against its stomach, as if holding another wound. The others looked disheveled and exhausted, as though they had all been running from something. It gave Puck an idea.

Let the weak and wounded play the part

Of the hunter to the goblin’s hart.

With a slight surge of mana, the wounded goblin took on the appearance of a random human dressed in leather armor and holding a short sword. It continued to stumble along, unaware of its change in appearance. The illusion masking it crept along with the appearance of a rogue stealthily preparing to assassinate one of the monsters from behind. This went on for about a minute before the goblin in the front turned to say something to its companions and screeched at the sight of the human. The two other goblins whirled and all three brandished weapons. The closest to the illusion carried a cudgel, the next a large femur from some animal with the knobs at the end filed to points, and the leader carried a rusty poignard that looked like a short sword in its hand. The fourth turned as well to look behind, but seeing nothing, turned back to its fellows. It began to talk raising its hands to calm its friends, and the illusion copied, making threats instead. The three armed goblins jumped the fourth, clubs descending and dagger stabbing again and again until the ‘human’ fell dead to the ground. As it died, the illusion faded and the mangled body of their comrade was left lying on the ground.

As Puck watched, the goblins immediately started bickering with each other in their own language as they stood over the corpse. To Puck’s surprise he found he understood every word, though he was fairly certain he’d never heard a word of Goblin in his life. He assumed it was part of the dungeon system magic. The argument was largely regarding confusion rather than blame, so Puck decided it was better to add to it than let it settle.

Let these monstrous voices on their dismal stage

Speak in tongues of blame and rage.

The leader of the goblins spoke and Puck paid attention to its words for the first time.

“You murdered Mugnock, you fuck!” the goblin said to the goblin carrying the bone mace, though its mouth clearly formed a different set of words.

“You murdered him just as much as I did,” the goblin at the other end of the accusation protested, not noticing the discrepancy between its leaders words and the movement of its lips.

The leader turned on the goblin with the cudgel with a look of consternation. It clearly heard the new words coming out of its mouth and was disturbed.

“And you, you thought it’d be a good idea to just help mash his brains?” the leader appeared to say. It raised its hands into the air in a helpless shrug.

“What the fuck? We thought he was one of the humans chasing us. And you put your fucking tiny sword into him like he was a breeder at a harvest festival,” the cudgel bearer replied.

Puck laughed to himself from his position as spectator as their leader clearly mouthed, That’s not what I said, while what came out became, “I bet Zignik is next, isn’t he? You going to wait until he’s sleeping and whack him with his own weapon?”

“Fuck you!” the cudgel bearer exclaimed. “I’d kill you before I ever raised a hand to Zignik.”

The goblin leader took a step away, bringing his poignard to bear. “You got a problem?” it asked. This time the words spoken matched what was intended.

“Yeah. You’re a fucking failure. You got half our party killed, and Mugnock too. You’re more worthy of wiping my ass than leading a raid.” Cudgel raised his weapon, standing defensively.

The argument continued, with a significant amount of posturing and threats. Puck noticed that he could feel the corpse of the dead goblin against his awareness and focused on absorbing it. The body and everything on it quickly turned into particles and disappeared. A comparatively hefty amount of energy drained into Puck’s stomach. It was more than he had received from any of the creatures or mushrooms he had consumed so far and still barely touched the newly expanded depths of the well inside him. He smiled in pleasure at the sensation and hoped the other goblins would follow suit.

A new scroll appeared.

You have gained Goblin Loincloth (1 lb. Value: 1 cp. Maybe) as Treasure. You can now include this in drops from your Monsters. Gross.

Puck laughed aloud.

The goblins jumped, startled.