Chapter Eleven - A name, and a friend

After getting lost twice and having to ask about five people where to go, she finally found the library. It spanned across half of the second floor of Redhall, so large that it was a miracle she didn’t find it sooner, but it seemed her orientation was a lot better out in the woods than here in the cramped hallways of manmade structures.

When she found it, she had to admit she liked what she saw.

The entire western side of the floor was made of glass, opening a wonderful view over the colorful gardens of Redhall and the city of Fall’s End behind it.

She had to stop and stare for a moment, taking in the bustling on the streets, the small dots that were people and the innumerably many houses that stretched on for quite the distance.

Then, she turned and combed through the shelves, looking for the distinct flame she’d seen before all while trying not the get distracted by the scenery around her.

The shelves were high, spanning from the floor to the ceiling that was at least twice her height, if not more, and they were stacked with books, so many it would take years to count them.

Silently, she was in awe of the people who sat down to read, flipping through the pages in silence, mostly because she couldn’t really understand the serene look on their faces.

If someone told her to sit silently at a desk, staring at pages and words, when in reality she could be outside, the sun on her face, the world beneath her feet, she wouldn’t last long.

After all, even though she’d only been here for a few minutes, she already longed for the sky.

That was also why she was kinda happy when she found the other woman behind the next shelf she checked.

“Ah, hi there!” she grinned when she saw her, huddled in a corner with a book on her lap.

Her brown hair was messy and her eyes slightly red and the dim glow of her flame spoke of the cloud of sadness that hung over her.

Not thinking much about it, the girl edged closer to her.

“Eh? Ah, uh….hello,” the young woman gave back, clearly started by her arrival.

“I wanted to talk to you,” she told her straight out. Seeing her again, the girl’s desire to be her friend grew. She didn’t really know why, but the young woman reminded her of her companions more than any other Immortal did - the silent steadiness, the sadness, the cry for help, it reminded her of the dozens of times she found an injured beast in the woods and couldn’t help but take them in.

“You?” the young woman was even more surprised, then slowly stood up and put the book in her hands back into the shelf. For a second, a gleam fluttered across her face, but it was soon replaced by bitterness, “That’s probably not a good idea.”

“Why?” the girl cocked her head, a frown on her lips.

“Haven’t you heard? I’m an Empress of Misfortune. I...bring ill luck to everyone around me. You should stay away.” her voice was cold, almost a whisper but the scream behind it echoed.

The frown on the girl’s lips grew tighter.

She did see it, the glum, the negativity that wound itself around the woman’s flame, reaching out with tendrils to touch everyone around her.

But it wasn’t as if it was volatile or hideous. It was a longing kind of darkness, one that tried to reach out to everyone around it - it was just unaware of the fact that that touch caused more harm than help.

The girl didn’t really mind it. The misfortune it brought was burned by her flames the moment it aimed to affix itself to her and what remained was nothing more than the touch of someone’s soul. It was a gentle touch.

“Your power is very gentle,” she told her with a smile, “I won’t stay away because of it.”

Now, disbelief seeped into the young woman’s expression.

“Gentle? There’s nothing gentle about it,” she scoffed, the hesitation on her face completely morphed into bitterness, “Don’t you get it? You’ll get hurt if you stay near me and before you blame me for it, get out of my way.”

Her words were venomous and the girl’s first instinct was to lash back, or maybe to leave her be if she wanted to be alone so much, but this time, it was her who hesitated.

Along with the woman’s lashing words, her flame seemed to sink into itself, forming an armour around her, but at the same time, those tendrils of her power still wouldn’t withdraw.

They still stretched out, wanting to touch, to reach someone with so much tenderness, the girl couldn’t help but be moved. Against someone who didn’t carry a shred of malice in her heart, she couldn’t respond with harshness.

“You don’t understand,” the girl softly shook her head, then she walked the few steps of distance between them to grab the woman’s hands, “Your powers can’t affect me. For one, I’m a lot stronger than you, so you couldn’t hurt me if you tried, but even if I weren’t, you don’t really want to cause someone misfortune, do you?”

The woman’s eyes grew wide as she spoke and the girl’s smile intensified.

“I can see it, you know? You’re lonely and you want to have friends more than anyone else, I can feel you reaching out. But if you want to, you don’t have to be lonely anymore. I’d like to be your friend.”

The young woman couldn’t help but be shocked.

It was a deep, sinking kind of shock, one that ate through her heart down to her bones, like an earthquake.

Gentle.

No one had ever used such words to describe her, not even speaking of her powers. No one had ever talked to her like this, with a kind smile on her lips and no ulterior motives of pushing her down or taking advantage of her.

No one, but this girl.

This girl who was so, so much like the sister she’d lost.

She’d only seen her once before, dismissed any possibility of being friends with her so thoroughly that it never came to her she might be sought out. And now just that girl stood in front of her, looking at her with eyes that were like molten pools of amber, speaking only truth. It scared her so much that she’d tried to push her away, but now that she wasn’t gone...

She’d been seen through.

All the loneliness, the pain, the despair, in this girl’s eyes they seemed to be reflected. The young woman felt bare.

But she also felt like this might be the only chance at acceptance she could get.

So she repeated, stupidly, foolishly.

“You...you won’t be hurt if you stay near me?” her voice wavered and the hope she’d forbidden herself to have came back with the force of a landslide.

“Yup,” the girl across her nodded cheerfully.

She won’t be hurt. I won’t...hurt her.

She could be around someone. Someone wanted to be around her.

The thoughts brought tears to her eyes, especially when she looked down to her hands that were still held by the girl. Someone would dare to touch her, wouldn’t shy away from her like she was a monster.

“You...want to be my friend?” the words were more of a whisper, but with so much longing that she didn’t dare look up.

“I do,” the girl said, still smiling so bright, “I don’t really have many friends and I have honestly no idea how to make them, but I’d like to be yours.”

She said it so easily, as if it wasn’t a big thing, but to the young woman, it was. It seemed almost too good to be true.

It meant that someone would be around her. She wouldn’t have to spend her days alone anymore, at least not all of them. She would be able to talk to someone, maybe even laugh.

“I’d also like to be your friend,” she said with as much courage as she could muster and then she suddenly felt a lot lighter. As if she’d lost some weight, she felt relieved, and, maybe just a little bit, happy.

“Oh I’m glad,” the girl grinned from ear to ear now, “Ever since I saw you in class today, I kinda wanted to talk to you. Your power is so different from everyone else’s after all.”

“My...power?” only now did she notice how bizarre everything was. How could this girl, who was, by her own words, only one year old know anything about her powers?

But the girl nodded again.

“I can see it, your flame. Everyone’s actually. It’s because I was born from a star, or at least, my soul was. Apparently all people like me can see them.”

She said it matter of factly, as if there wasn’t something big hidden inside her words. But the young woman, who had dedicated herself to reading about this world for three years, gaped involuntarily.

“Firakha? You’re Firakha?”

Her voice must’ve shown her awe, because a frown slipped on the girl’s face as she nodded. But this was...shocking, somewhat.

Firakha were a legend, even amongst chaos-forged Immortals. If those were considered rare, then the children of the stars were nearly non-existent. One was born roughly one in a million years and each of them that didn’t die prematurely grew to be a major figure in the Plane of Gods, some still were. If one believed the stories, even one of the High Gods was a born Firakha.

To meet one here, in a rather unremarkable city, just like that, was far against all odds.

Even more so considering that one wanted to be her friend - or rather, already was.

“Is it that of a big thing?” the girl asked when she still hadn’t closed her mouth after a while.

The young woman only nodded.

Something bitter flashed across the girl’s face.

“So I’m never going to be like you all, will I?” she muttered, more to herself than to her opposite.

“Ah, but it’s not a bad thing! If anything, it’s really amazing! I never thought I’d be able to meet a child of the stars, but they are all really amazing!”

She spoke quickly, more excited than she’d been for a long, long time, but she really didn’t want to cause a friction between them just because of her awe for a living legend.

Seeing her frantic attempts to make it good, the frown melted away form the girl’s face.

“I get it,” she chuckled, “I’ll strive not to disappoint you!”

Her uptight act forced a laugh out of the young woman too and the girl finally released her hands.

“So,” the girl began, fidgeting a little, “I want to ask you something.”

“What is it?” she replied immediately, ready to accept anything.

“Er, well, I heard - saw - that you don’t have a name. And I don’t have one either. So I thought - hoped - maybe we could...give each other names...?” She sounded really nervous as she spoke, clearly it was important to her.

The woman’s heart sank into her guts, then gained wings and fluttered into the skies.

This was her dream.

A name. I can really have one again? I?

Hope, happiness, spread through her, burst into fireworks. Ever since she lost her last one, she’d mourned for it, every single day. But she had never been able to sell herself for one, refusing to give away that last shred of dignity.

But this wasn’t an offer for slavery. This was an offer for friendship. For a bond. From a girl who seemed to genuinely want to be her friend, to be bound to her.

“Are you sure you want to?” With me? She couldn’t help but ask.

“Yes! I meant it when I said I want to be your friend. I also don’t want to be friends just to have a name. I just thought, if you want one as much as I do…”

She believed her. Maybe it was foolish of her to trust a stranger. But this was a crossroads for her.

She could say no and continue to spend her days in gloom and darkness.

But frankly, she found no reasons to do that.

There were risks, but not many. She could be betrayed, but she also could find a friend.

And isn’t that what I always wanted? No, I can’t be that stupid.

I won’t say no this time.

“I want to! I want to exchange names,” she said before she could back out.

“You can't believe how much I hoped you would say that,” the girl grinned, her face glowing, “So, how do we do it? I have no idea how it works.”

She laughed despite her ignorance and the young woman was once again immensely glad she’d been so fixated about reading all this time.

“I know it, I’ve read about it once. In a mutual name-giving, both participants draw a circle with their own blood on the other’s forehead and gives them a name. It didn’t say anything else about it, actually.”

“That sounds simple,” the girl nodded, “Come on, let’s go outside.”

She grabbed her hands again and dragged her out of the library. The young woman didn’t struggle against her hold, only followed her even though she had no idea why they should go out instead of just staying in the library.

A few minutes and only one wrong turn later, they stood in the gardens, surrounded by silence and colourful leaves.

“Sorry, I don’t like to be inside for too long. It’s so stuffy,” the girl admitted and even though the young woman didn’t really understand it, she didn't say anything, fearful of jeopardizing her newfound friendship. Instead, she tried to snuff the nervous mumble in her stomach.

This was what she’d longed for for a long time. Finally.

Finally she could regain a little of what she’d lost before.

A friend, a name.

It was a beginning and so much more she’d dared to dream of.

Without much ado, the girl pulled a sword from a sheath she’d attached to her belt and held out to her.

“Let’s do this?” she asked once more, anticipation in her voice.

“Y-yeah.”

The young woman took the sword and drew it across her finger, knowing the wound would close within a few minutes anyways.

She took a deep breath and looked at the girl once more.

In that moment, she knew the name she’d give her. There was never another possibility. It might come to haunt her later that she used this opportunity to stuff one of her old wounds, but she couldn’t find any better choice.

So she drew a circle across the girl’s forehead, the red of her blood glowing against the red strands of hair that fluttered around it.

“With this token of my blood, I give you the name Arette.”

She said it in one breath, unable to add anything. She felt a little guilty for using her sister’s name like this, but it seemed so appropriate. She was also sure her sister would’ve appreciated her attempt to keep at least a small part of her with her.

It was selfish.

Nonetheless, the girl’s, no, Arette’s eyes lit up brightly.

“Thank you. This means a lot to me,” she said sincerely. Then, without further ado, she took the sword from her and drew the blade across her own finger.

The smile stayed on her face as she drew the blood over her forehead.

The young woman swallowed nervously as the warm finger touched her skin.

“I’m not good at finding names, but I think this one fits you. So with this blood, I name you Liz. I hope we’ll stay friends.”

The blood seeped into her skin, leaving a faint tingling.

Liz.

It wasn’t the name of her past life, nor was it one she’d have given herself, but she didn’t dislike it.

It didn’t feel wrong.

Liz.

She had a name now.

She could feel the connection between her and the girl, a faint pull that wasn’t much more than awareness. It wasn’t much at all, but it was enough to make her heart feel giddy. It was a bit like she’d regained some of the family she’d lost.

It was a bit like feeling at home.

“Thank you so much,” she whispered, tears swimming in her eyes.

Arette turned to her and the glow in her eyes could’ve made the sun look bland.

In that moment, Liz thought she wouldn’t mind to much to look at that glow for the rest of her life.

END OF PART ONE - THE GIRL THAT WAS BORN FROM A DYING STAR