Longshot Gil’s Last Minute Chicken Stir Fry

Ingredients:

1 quantity of whatever chicken you have on hand, cut into cubes about yea big

(“How big? I need an estimate to write down.”

“Don’t matter, chief. Just make sure they’re even.”)

1 head of cabbage, diced

1 or 2 onions, if you have them, sliced

Garlic

(“How much?”

“You’ll understand when you’re older.”

“Gil, what does that even-”)

Honey

Sambal Oelek to taste

(“I don’t even know where to get that.”

“I have my sources.”)

Soy Sauce

Process:

Mix together the Sambal, Soy Sauce, and Honey. If you’re using red meat instead of chicken, you’ll need to marinate it for a few hours.

(“Then it’s not really a chicken recipe any more, is it?”

“Shut it, chief.”)

Run a current through a fire magicite stone to activate it, and heat a large iron pan or bowl over it.

(“Or, say, a fire?”

“Hey, who’s the chef here, me or you?”)

Toss some oil in the pan. Butter is an acceptable substitute.

Put the chicken, garlic, and onion in the pan and cook until no longer pink. Pour in the honey, sambal, and soy sauce mixture and stir occasionally.

Put in the cabbage; it cooks quickly, so watch carefully.

Serve over rice or noodles.

Gil smiled proudly as Sam put down his pencil and took a deep breath.

“Well,” the older man said, “What do you think?”

“Gil,” Sam said seriously, “This so-called ‘recipe’ is completely useless to everyone except you.”

The grizzled adventurer’s face fell. “What do ya’ mean?” He whined, “It’s good chicken, and I don’t have cooking skills that change the process or anything.”

The young [Scholar] held up the page he had been writing on, pointing to the ‘Ingredients’ section. “How much chicken?” He asked, “How much honey goes with how much soy sauce? How much do you need to mix it, and how do you know when it's done? No one else can use this.”

Thoughtfully, Gil stroked his beard. “So what you’re saying is…”

Sam nodded encouragingly.

“... I’m too good at cooking to pass on my skills! Thanks, chief, but I’m gonna keep trying!”There was a hefty thunk as the boy’s head slammed into the table.