We headed north towards the border of The Land of Mountains and the Land of Iron, more because I didn't want to go back towards Suna than having any actual concrete goal in that area, it was a pretty long journey to Taki no matter which way we went, I just preferred snow to sand.

The walking was dull, mostly because the landscape was so barren, but I noticed a distinct drop in temperature the closer to the border we got, and the entire time I kept coming back thinking of what I had to do.

I was sure that I had forgotten more of the events that had happened before Shippuden, and I was desperately hoping that there wasn't another spin-off game of some sort that was going to destroy the world that I hadn't ever gotten around to playing.

Shadow demon guy, the Bloodline stealing guy, Zero Tails plus Sky Ninja.

Those were all things that were coming up later, and I was hoping something would jog my memory, and I would remember some of the others, but until then, I still only had a single goal.

Killing Hidan and Kakuzu, and once again, my thoughts had come full circle.

How the hell was I going to sell this to Karenbana? The Janin was something unplanned that we had just gotten caught up in, but I'd been planning on fighting these two since I figured out where I was. I suppose I would have to give her another chance to bail out before then. I didn't want to fight them if I was being honest, so I wasn't going to try forcing anyone else either.

"Karenbana," I said slowly.

"Sora?" Karenbana said curiously.

"I have decided on my next goal," I said cheerfully. "Care to guess what It is?"

Karenbana raised an eyebrow at me.

"Is it another sword?" Karenbana said thoughtfully, "No, you said you had a list of people you wanted to get revenge on or something."

Not quite what I had said, they hadn't done anything to me to warrant 'revenge.' It was more like a pre-emptive murder attempt, really. Should I pick up another sword? I knew where one was and had a decent idea on some others. I'd think more about it later.

"Something like that," I said cheerfully, "There are two people I need to kill in about a year from now."

Karenbana tilted her head.

"Why do you need to kill them?" Karenbana asked curiously.

I blinked; I thought for sure she would ask who I was trying to kill first, huh. I suppose I should just tell her now and get it out of the way.

"The world is going to end unless I kill a specific bunch of people," I said cheerfully, "Probably."

Karenbana was quite for a long moment, and I absolutely knew, even without looking at her, that she was staring straight at the side of my head, but I just remained silent as her annoyance slowly rose at my complete lack of details.

"Why is the world going to end?" Karenbana said tightly, "How would you even know something like that?"

"Good questions," I said cheerfully while ignoring them both completely; that was another rabbit hole I wasn't going down right now. "The two people I intend to kill are kind of annoying to kill."

Karenbana reached out to grab me by the shoulder, but I juked to the side, already expecting it. Fool me once, shame on me, fool me twice-

Fuck you, she still got me.

Karenbana turned me around to face her and then crossed her arms across her chest, staring up at me dangerously.

"There is a whole host of threats all over the place that could cause the world to end," I said honestly, "I'm probably going to have to kill at least some of them; listing them all would be totally annoying."

Karenbana stared at me silently, and I sighed.

"Fine," I complained, before ticking them off my fingers. "There's this shadow demon asshole with a gang of, five? Jounin level ninja, and an immortal army of thousands of moving statues that are trying to kill a future predicting princess in the Land of Demons, if I don't kill him, he will conquer the entire world, probably."

Karenbana narrowed her eyes at the information, no doubt annoyed that I hadn't told her about it when we had literally been crossing that exact country a month or so ago.

"There's this tail-less tailed beast running around that eats anger or hatred or something," I said thoughtfully, "It is being used by this supposedly immortal asshole that controls a flying castle with this massive city-destroying laser, an army of ninja that can fly and he plans on killing everybody in the Land of Fire in revenge for getting his shit pushed in during one of the wars."

Karenbana opened her mouth to say something, but I just flicked the third finger up.

"There's this time-traveling asshole that can control a couple of thousand puppets at once with that Sunagakure puppet technique," I continued easily, "if he isn't killed in the next few years, he will probably end up going back in time and killing the Fourth Hokage before he becomes the Fourth Hokage and then who knows what the hell that will do to the world."

"Stop," Karenbana said, annoyed.

"Then there's this other asshole ninja that going to go around the world stealing all the cool Bloodline limits and then combining them to become the strongest ninja in the world," I kept on talking over the top of her. "I don't really know what his plan was after that, but it probably involved taking over the world or some villainous nonsense."

“Sora.” Karenbana said strained.

"Oh!" I said cheerfully, "There's also this ninja prison somewhere that contains a box of bliss or something? Either way, once it's open, it releases an immortal flying demon asshole that will probably kill everybody."

"The Blood Prison?" Karenbana said weakly.

"How could I forget Akatsuki, who wants to collect all the tailed beast to make a superweapon and then take over the world?" I said flippantly.

"That was true?" Karenbana said quietly.

"There then is an actual motherfucker on the moon, and I shit you not," I said incredulously, "Misheard what his ancestor said and decided the guy wanted him to steal hundreds of people's eyes before smashing the moon into the earth."

"If you don't let me-" Karenbana said intently.

"Then there's a bunch of other guys from another dimension? Planet? Somewhere else, who want to steal all the chakra from this world, and one of them was already here like ages ago so-" I started.

That was as far as I got before Karenbana punched me in the stomach, folding me over like a towel around her fist, and I fell to my knees, gasping for breath.

"That was totally uncalled for," I wheezed. "you shitty bodyguard."

"Sora." Karenbana sighed, "How much of that is true?"

"All of it," I gasped out, before trying to catch my breath. "I might have got some of their motivations mixed up or wrong, but the events are more or less true, there's way more than just those anyway."

"You know all of this, like you know who people are when you look at them?" Karenbana said quietly. "How you knew where Shiromari was? And the Dragonblade?"

"More or less," I managed.

Karenbana just watched me quietly.

"Some of these events might have already happened though, or happen at the same time as each other, or happen at any of those times but in a really weird way," I had mostly recovered now, "I knew where the Dragonblade was kind of, but the events of that shitshow weren't supposed to happen for several years, and probably wouldn't have?"

I don't see how the ninjas could have realistically made all the sealing equipment they hand waved away in that game, and I'm pretty sure the mountain wasn't anywhere near where it had been in the game. I'm really lucky that Kakeru had heard about the dragon story.

"Who are the two people you need to kill in a year," Karenbana said intently, "How do they fit into this?"

Oh right, I had attempted to tell her that earlier, but I'd been derailed.

"Two members of Akatsuki," I said easily, "They are going to be attacking the green-haired chick."

"Green-haired chick?" Karenbana said, confused.

"I can't remember her name," I said honestly, "The Jinchuriki from Takigakure."

I put together what I knew of the two immortal bastards in my mind.

"The first guy is called Hidan," I said slowly. "He keeps on living even if you chop his head off, he's also got this giant red triple scythe thing, and if he manages to get any of your blood, he does this weird-ass technique that links you together so that any damage inflicted on him hits you as well. He's from uh, the hot springs place, what's their ninja village called?"

"Land of Hot Springs?" Karenbana said quietly, "Yugakure?"

"Sounds about right," I shrugged.

"I haven't heard of him," Karenbana said honestly. "Is he a Jounin?"

A Jounin? Oh, I hadn't told her how strong Akatsuki was.

"All of Akatsuki members are S-rank missing-ninja," I added belatedly, "and they come in pairs."

Karenbana stared at me with wide eyes.

"The other members are uh, Konan, Pain, Hidan, Kakuzu, Sasori, Deidara, Kisame Hoshigaki, Itachi Uchiha, Tobi?" I listed off from memory, "Orochimaru used to be a member too, but he quit, another one of the seven sword guys was Itachi's partner at some point as well, but I think he might have died already? Kakuzu killed a bunch of his previous partners as well because he's got anger issues or something."

"Itachi Uchiha? Sasori of the Red Sand? Orochimaru of the Sannin?" Karenbana hissed, "Are you fucking kidding me, Sora?!"

"Yeah, those guys are pretty scary," I said honestly. "I'm more scared of Kakuzu and Kisame, myself,"

"Who the fuck is Kakuzu?" Karenbana demanded.

I waved my hand vaguely.

"He's this missing-nin from Takigakure, his body is made up of these black threads, he has a massive amount of chakra, five different hearts that come out of his back and run around independently of him can use practically every elemental ninjutsu, combines them into even stronger techniques as well," I rattled off all the notable things I remembered about the guy, "He lost a fight to the First Hokage back when they were young fellas, but managed to get away intact."

"How is he still alive if he fought the First Hokage?" Karenbana said quietly, "That guy died a long time ago."

"Kakuzu and Hidan are both immortal," I clarified.

Karenbana was looking even more angry by the second.

"Kisame is one of the seven sword guys from Mist, he has this giant sentient chakra draining sword," I pretended to take a couple of slashes with a giant imaginary sword, "He supposedly has as much chakra as a tailed beast, he's a master of water ninjutsu, shark summons as well, I think?"

Karenbana fell silent after that, and I let her have a moment to think about everything I told her.

"The main reason I even brought it up," I said quietly after several minutes had passed. "I need to be near Taki to kill Kakuzu and Hidan, but I thought I should probably tell you about, you know."

I waved my arm to represent the entire conversation we'd just had.

"If you want to bail, now is probably the optimal time." I said honestly, "I'm going to be training non-stop on the way to waterfall."

"There is absolutely no way you can kill an S-rank," Karenbana said quietly. "Let alone two."

I just shrugged, she was right that right now, I couldn't do it, but with more than a year of training before I had to fight them, surely that would be enough time to grind myself up to where I needed to be.

"We shouldn't have been able to kill three Jounin either, but with the power of love and friendship on our side, we conquered that obstacle without much issue," I said easily.

"I'm a fucking chunin," Karenbana said seriously, "and you can't even beat me."

I snorted; she felt a lot closer to a Jounin these days, honestly.

"That's because I was holding back to spare your little feelings, haven't you figured that out yet?" I said cockily. "Idiot."

Karenbana started towards me.

Long story short, she easily kicked my ass, but I made her work for it, I hope.

We had purchased a map of the continent back at Sakai, and last night I spent several hours sketching out what seemed like the best route to get to waterfall from the Land of Iron.

I had come up with a cunning plan, a plan that I was sure I would regret about a week after it finally worked, but it was cunning none the less.

Karenbana was proving difficult to foil, however.

I had been trying to try to get her to summon Shiromari again, but she continued to tell me to fuck off, and that the last time she had done it, she had been left with practically zero chakra. I suppose that's why she had taken so long to come back to camp.

It was a work in progress.

The Land of Iron was our first stop, well technically, our first stop was a stone-carved bridge called Samurai Bridge, and it took me a couple of seconds before I realized that I had seen it before, specifically the giant stone katana that was set on top.

This was where Sasuke had fought Danzo after the Kage Summit.

It allowed us safe passage over the river that ran through the chasm far below us, and up onto the mountainous terrain that would eventually lead us into the snow. We ended up climbing to a high point near the bridge to get a good look at the area, and the thing that stood out the most was the three incredibly strange mountains in the distance.

I remembered them from the source material as well, but the fact that I could see it from all the way here was crazy. It was several weeks to travel there at least, and regardless of the amount of haze in the area, probably very distant snowfall, the three mountainous maws speared up through it all to tower over the landscape. You could see the gradient of the rocky and somewhat tree-dotted terrain slowly vanish entirely to snow-filled plains.

We ended up camping here for the night.

Hours later, I had finally decided on the next technique I would be attempting to create.

The options were a Teleport skill and an energy defense; I kind of had an energy defense now, though, in the form of the Dragonblade. I could use it to steal the chakra out of attacks and dissipate them, hopefully. I'll probably still try and make one in the future anyway, but for now, I was going to work on what I was certain would be the most expensive and short-range teleport of all time, at least judging by every other skill I had made anyway.

This was another case where I had lots of media to pull from as inspiration.

There was teleporting like Nightcrawler, or the teleporting from Jumper, all the different foot moves from Bleach, and a hundred other variations of teleporting; hell, there was even a bunch already in this world.

I didn't want a position movement skill that moved me in a straight line to the destination as Shunshin did though, I needed one where I didn't need to worry about obstacles in between myself and the target. Bleach was out; I'm fairly sure they had to cross the physical distance in some way; it was like body flicker in that regard. Nightcrawler left behind smoke, which wasn't what I wanted, and Jumper had some weird-ass mechanics that I couldn't remember. I didn't want to have to throw a marker of some sort, like the flying thunder god technique, and I didn't want to stand around for five seconds while I got sucked into an eye technique like Obito.

What else was there? Instant transmission? Apparition? Teleport from Pokémon? Some of them had elements of what I wanted, but other things that made them sub-optimal. Instant transmission only worked with energy signatures, Apparition required spinning first and made a loud noise, and I don't know how Teleport from Pokémon worked.

I would just have to try to get what I wanted, through sheer force of will. I dropped into Meditate before slowly gathering as much Mana as possible and spreading it throughout my entire body. I kept at it until my entire body was filled, as evenly as I could manage.

What did I want?

I wanted to teleport, I wanted it to be instantaneous, I didn't want to cross the space in between, I wanted to be able to use it in combat. I continued slowly adding more Mana and condensing it, doing my best to keep it contained inside my body, and begun my mantra.

Teleport, Instant, Space, Combat, Teleport, Instant, Space, Combat.

I added more Mana as I generated it with Meditate until I was practically glowing in the dark with a pale, ethereal light. I was still slowly adding more Mana for what had to have been almost an hour before I could feel myself starting to lose control over it, and it was slowly wafting up past my skin into the air. I dug deep into my willpower and tried to clamp it down tightly and desired more than anything else to be somewhere else.

The Mana flooding in my body twisted violently, and the pattern was too much for me to understand it with a single attempt. My Mana dipped significantly, and my view of the mountains abruptly changed a tiny amount.

You have unlocked a new skill, Jaunt.

I let out the breath I had been holding and opened up the description.

Jaunt (Level 1) – Uses Mana to instantly move the target into a different point in space without crossing the physical distance in between.

Type – Cast.

Cast Time – 29.5 (60) seconds.

Target – Self, Other.

Cost – 168.5(200) Mana.

Range 0.25m (+0.25 per level.)

Each additional passenger will incur the Mana cost.

Repositioning is possible during Jaunt. It was what I wanted kind of; I would never be able to get this high enough to teleport from country to country; the range scaling fucking sucked. Why did they start so god damn weak? Why couldn't I have a useful skill without having to train it for months for it to be worth anything? I could step further away, then this would take me, and that at least would cost me no Mana at all, and the cast time was massive! Once every thirty seconds!? I would need to double my Casting Speed skill to get it to an instant cast.

Which was more important here? Increasing the range slowly by casting it whenever I could or just spamming other skills to grind Casting Speed up to the point where I could spam Jaunt until I ran out of Mana?

I had a year to find out. The Land of Iron was pretty fucking cold, all things considered.

Wearing two layers of our desert gear was almost enough for it to be comfortable, but we had both already agreed to stop by the Capital to buy some proper snow gear. The upside was that since I had revealed my inventory back in the Land of Neck, I was able to shunt all of out crap inside it so we could pretty much travel with just our clothes.

Camping in the snow was an experience I wasn't sure I hated or loved.

There were no trees to tie the tent too, and the ground was covered in a fairly deep layer of snow, so the pegs didn't actually stay in the ground very well. Before it got too late in the day, we made sure to locate some form of natural cover, at least from one side, a rock formation spearing out of the ground, or a frozen tree.

Karenbana had mentioned how annoying it would be before we had left Samurai Bridge, so I had been stuffing every single boulder I could lift into my inventory to use as something to tie a tent rope too. It only partially worked, because the boulders ended up sinking slowly over a few hours and were a pain in the ass to dig back out afterward.

The upside was that it was super cold even in the tent, so we ended up figuring out several interesting ways to stay warm. The capital city of the Land of Iron was an exceptionally large place.

I don't know exactly what this place's population was, but it had to be in the hundred thousand range. There were so many houses, so many buildings, large walled compounds dotted the city, topped with wooden guards to deflect the falling snow away from the stone. It didn't really work because most of them were buried under several layers of it.

There were two or three buildings that rose above all of the others, planted on top of massive stone foundations, not unlike where Shiromari had once sat. They looked like a cross between castles and towers, built from a mottled grey stone.

The whole place was sprawling, dense, and strangely beautiful.

The city was situated at a high enough elevation that I could see the churning ocean to the north, at least a week's travel away. It stretched off into the distance before being swallowed by stormy clouds and more of that endless snowy haze.

The southern entrance to the city was a large torii styled gate, and many guards were manning the gatehouse, all dressed in plain grey amour, and they carried long swords that could only be katana.

Fucking weebs.

"What is your purpose here?" The captain of the group said firmly.

"We are passing through on our way to the Land of Bears," I said honestly, "We didn't prepare proper clothing for the journey, and hope to buy some actual supplies."

"Where did you come from?" The captain said sternly.

"The Land of the Mountain," I said easily.

"We've had reports that a large earthquake has taken place in the Land of the Mountains," The captain said evenly, "Have you any news?"

"Oh!" I said, surprised, "That big ass mountain totally exploded!"

I felt Karenbana shift minutely to look at me; we had agreed not to mention it to anyone. I would be paying for this later.

"What do you mean?" The captain said uneasily.

"Yeah, that massive one on the east-side with all the dead land around it?" I nodded excitedly, "The entire top half suddenly just exploded for no reason; nobody has any idea what was going on."

The captain looked flabbergasted, so I kept ongoing.

"Me and my wife here were making our way along the west coast, fishing, and camping, you know?" I said happily, and I felt Karenbana twitch violently. "Then there was this massive crack, and we ran up to the top of that big hill near the water, and wow!"

I reached over and pulled Karenbana bodily against me, and she let me do it for the sake of my sudden bullshit cover story. I absolutely knew she was going to kick my ass for this later, but it was totally worth it to see her cheeks glowing red.

"I always hated that mountain; it seemed to be a bad omen, killing everything around it." I shook my head, "I'm honestly glad it's gone, whoever was responsible for it deserves a medal or a monetary reward of some kind; maybe we could start up some kind of crowdfunding for it?"

Karenbana had slipped her hand up the back of my shirt and was currently pinching my back skin with all of her ninja might. It was incredibly painful, and I could feel tears welling up in the corner of my eyes. I wiped my hand over my eyes and smiled tearily at the guards.

"Say, mind if we go find those supplies?" I asked happily.

The captain of the gatehouse just nodded uneasily. We stayed in a small hotel for only two nights before setting out and buying proper snow gear for the trip. It didn't take us long to find it all; nearly every place that had clothes for sale had the same snow-type gear, and we left soon after. Neither of us wanted to stay here too long in case the Mount Koryū situation was traced back to us somehow.

We headed north to the coast, and the closer we got to it, the windier it became.

The waters were rough up here, waves high and tumbling down, not at all like the still, calm, coast at Land of the Keys. It took us a week to actually get the waterfront, and I was glad I had brought so many rocks with us because the wind was strong enough that I had eventually just set up a large pile of stones just to make a windbreak.

I finally managed to goad Karenbana into summoning Shiromari again, this time while I was actually around to speak to him. The chameleon was gigantic, invisible, and had bright red eyes that vanished as soon as he blinked. Karenbana sat on the ground panting from the effort of summoning it, using about ninety percent of her chakra to accomplish the feat.

Shiromari was fucking terrifying like this.

"Karenbana-chan, you have summoned me once more." Shiromari rumbled, "Are you in need of assistance?"

"N-no, Shiromari-sama," Karenbana panted, "I haven't got much experience with the summoning technique; I wanted to, try and become, more proficient with it, I'm sorry, for disturbing you."

What a suck-ass.

"Yo, Shiromari," I said cheerfully, "What's it been like being back at home? It had been a while, hadn't it? You have kids all grown up now? They must have been happy to see you."

Karenbana swiped at me with her hand but missed; she was still pretty out of it from the massive loss of chakra. Shiromari rumbled something incoherent out, and after a moment, I realized he was laughing.

"Ah, the man who saved me," Shiromari said gratefully, "Karenbana-chan spoke fondly of you. I owe you a great debt, why have you not signed my contract, Sora-kun?"

I grinned up at him.

"I wouldn't be able to summon you, buddy." I said honestly, "I don't have chakra, I have this weird-ass form of energy called 'Mana.'"

Shiromari rumbled out a curious noise, and his massive red eyes dipped low for a moment; oh, he was nodding. Karenbana was still panting on her knees, but she was also glaring at me for the disrespect.

I smirked at her.

"Say, Shiromari," I said curiously, "I know of several summoner guys that have access to a technique called the 'Sage Mode.' The Toads primarily, the Snakes, there are some others as well I'm pretty sure, have you got a version of it?"

Shiromari's massive red eyes widened slightly, while Karenbana looked lost at the topic.

"I am surprised you know of the technique at all; it is rarely talked about, even with those who sign the contracts." Shiromari rumbled curiously, "The Chameleons do indeed have access to such a technique, how did you come to hear of it?"

"I have this weird ability to know about things, its hard to explain honestly," I said cheerfully, "It's how I knew you needed our help in the first place."

"Interesting," Shiromari rumbled.

"Long story short," I said happily, "Karenbana here has decided to help me in my quest to stop a bunch of S-rank missing-ninja from destroying the world; I was hoping you could juice her up with that spicy Sage Chakra; that should be enough to get her on the level we need, because honestly? She's kind of weak now, despite all the help I keep giving her, I wouldn't want her to embarrass you guys in our first big fight."

Karenbana looked like she didn't know whether she was supposed to beat the shit out of me or not, probably wondering what the hell a Sage Mode was in the first place; it was greatly amusing.

"You have both done me a great service," Shiromari rumbled lowly, "It would infringe upon my honor to deny such a request, especially from one so selfless as to use that debt upon my new summoner instead of himself."

"You're the best, Shiromari." I said honestly, "I'll make sure to spread the word of how awesome you Chameleon guys are."

Shiromari rumbled out another laugh.

"Shiromari-sama?" Karenbana said nervously, unsure exactly what craziness I had just dropped on her.

"Karenbana-chan, the technique he is referring to is exceedingly dangerous. It will take a very long time to master," Shiromari rumbled seriously, "Once you begin the training, it is best to continue until you have mastered it."

Karenbana listened nervously.

"Yeah, you should totally start immediately," I said easily, "Else, we will probably all die, you know?"

Karenbana turned to stare at me quietly, but Shiromari rumbled out an agreement to my request.

"Karenbana-chan, I will summon you to the Land of the Chameleons in three days to begin the training." Shiromari rumbled firmly. "Until next time."

"See you around, Shiromari!" I said happily.

Shiromari dipped his head in goodbye before vanishing in a massive smoke cloud that seemingly appeared out of nowhere. Karenbana finally managed to push herself unsteadily to her feet.

"Sora-" Karenbana said quietly.

"That's two months payment for when you finally get back," I said immediately and headed back to the ocean for more training. "You shitty bodyguard."

Karenbana made a motion as if to follow but stumbled immediately in exhaustion.

"You better learn it quickly, Karenbana," I called over my shoulder. "or I'll have to save the world on my own!"