For a moment Gary just stared at his unconscious pokemon held in the grasp of my epic new Charmeleon.

Before, with a sigh, the brown haired teen's shoulders slumped and he lifted his hand into the air, pokeball in his grasp, "Return, Wartortle." he said, a moment later, a beam of red light shooting from the pokeball and enveloping the water type.

It disappeared into the pokeball and Gary stared at it, looking quite shocked if I do so say myself.

Quite possibly bamboozled, and I don't blame him. Gary was probably quite the hot shot new trainer until now.

To bad he ran into the awesomeness that is the Great Jord. Few could stand up to the towering heights of the epic me. Heh.

"Clap their cheeks?" Hilda's voice behind me broke me from my inner masturbation and I turned around to see her looking at me, arms crossed, one eyebrow raised and gaze so dry it would make a Magmar's tail jealous, "Please don't tell me you're seriously considering that."

My lips quirked up into a smirk, "Nah, it's just a joke," I admitted with a laugh, "Besides, you know the only cheeks I wanna clap are yours."

Well, not the only ones, but a little white lie never hurts anybody. As long as it isn't found out, or the other person isn't a dramatic little bitch.

"Oh, how romantic. I'm practically swooning," Hilda rolled her eyes, before snorting, "You know, it's kinda cute being a horny little shit at your age, but give it a few years and it'll just be creepy and annoying."

Well, she's not wrong. But, she missed something;

"Why do you think I'm milking it so much?" I grinned at her, "It's cuz even while it is fun, it's cuz I know I can get away with it right now." I mean come on, beyond getting a few more extra years to live, there really isn't much benefits to being de-aged.

Well, beyond the fact that I can practically sculpt my bodies path of growth this time around. I discovered a fun little fact about Chansey and Heal Pulse while going through the pokedex.

But, I'll keep that tid bit to myself for now.

Besides, the few extra years of living won't matter shit to me with my plans for the future.

"...Of course you do, I don't know why I'm surprised," Hilda shook her head, but she couldn't hide the way her lips twitched up briefly into a smile from me, "I guess this'll be good stuff to bring up when you get all famous and I interview you."

"There you go!" I clapped, "See, now you're getting it."

She rolled her eyes again, but I didn't pay attention, instead I turned around to face the fire type that had just won me the battle, standing silently and waiting for me.

Man, looking at him just quiet and waiting for me, his crimson red scales gleaming in the light from the Sunny Day above, Charmeleon looks all stoic and badass.

Like a raptor. Scary almost, but a certain terrifying coolness factor to him. "That's ma boy!" I flashed him a thumbs up.

And immediately, the cool stoic badass look was broken as a wide grin broke out on Charmeleon's face and he raced over to me and leapt through the air towards me.

I caught him around the middle and spun with him, "Look at you, all big and powerful now!" I gushed, "Next time he see's you that scrub Cross will probably cry."

"Char Char!" Charmeleon happily hugged me back. And god is he pretty damn big now, already coming up to my chest in height and packed with tons of weighty muscle beneath those gleaming scales.

Guess he won't be riding on my shoulders anymore. Ah, it only lasted like two weeks, but I'm gonna miss those days of cute Charmander huggable fun.

Now the gates have opened for the badass Charmeleon days and in the future, legendary Charizard days.

"So, is that your starter I take it then?" Gary's voice made me look up from where I was hugging Charmeleon.

The brown haired Pallet native was making his way over, rubbing one hand through the back of his spiky brown hair.

I set Charmeleon down and rested one hand on his head as I looked the older teen in the eyes, the fire type leaning into my touch, "Actually no, I only caught this guy roughly two weeks ago," I replied, "He had another scrub of a trainer before who released him cuz I beat him in a battle with my Beedrill."

"...Two weeks huh," I saw Gary visibly bite the inside of his cheek and shake his head, "Well at least I know for a fact you used TM's on this one, no way it'd be able to learn Blast Burn without being fully evolved without em."

"I've used a few on him, only about five though," I shrugged, "If I used as much TM's on him as you did that monster of a Wartortle, we'd have clapped your cheeks even harder."

Gary snorted, "Are you actually gonna use that from now on?" he asked, unable to stop himself from grinning at the thought, "I'm not gonna lie kid, that's hilarious, I'd love to see gramps reaction to you spouting that on live television at the Indigo League or something."

"Nah, that's something I came up with just for you." I laughed.

"Heh, sorry kid, I ain't into dudes no matter how muscular," he nodded respectfully at my biceps, then jabbed his thumb over his shoulder to where his cheerleaders were waiting, "I'm more into the soft and curvy variety as you can no doubt tell."

"Neither am I," I shot back, "And even if I was, I could do so much better. You're not bad looking for a dude I guess, but if I was into guys I'd be be going for way higher, like Lance or Steven Stone."

One of his eyebrows twitched, "Oh please, I'm way outta your league Jordie-boy." he snorted, crossing his arms.

"You wish Gare-bear," I jutted my chin out at him challengingly, then jabbed my own thumb over my shoulder at Hilda, "You can see the difference between us in just our travelling companions, those cheerleaders ain't got nothing on Hilda."

"...She is pretty hot, not gonna lie," Gary conceded, "Guess how hot she is goes with how crazy you and your pokemon are, she was not lying when she said you're a freak of nature when it comes to training pokemon kid, that Shiftry and this Charmeleon are seriously no joke." he admitted, casting a bit of an awed look at the fire type by my side.

"We train constantly," I shrugged before snorting and pointing out, "And like you're one to talk, that Nidoking had some serious fire power from how little I saw of it and your Wartortle is a fucking monster."

"Mostly through Tm's though," Gary admitted, "Granted,I'll admit, I had a bit of a head start with Wartortle, I knew I was gonna grab him before I started my journey and I got early access to him for a few months as a deal from my gramps for not starting my journey early like you."

My eyebrows climbed up practically into my hairline, "I thought you were waiting for that other guy before you started?" I brought up what he mentioned before.

Gary laughed sheepishly, "Well, I mean, it's one of the reasons," he replied, "Mostly, my gramps just didn't want me starting early, said it was too dangerous or something like that and gave me a bunch of things in return for not starting off so early."

You know, I wondered about something a bit and this might be the answer to why. I mean, Professor Oak doesn't really seem the type to spoil his grandson too much, or at least let him get away with the shit he's doing with the car and the cheerleaders.

That also explained why his Wartortle is such a monster as well, being so much stronger than his Nidoking when they both had tons of TM's burned into them.

"The money?" I asked, nodding sagely.

"You guessed it kid," Gary laughed, "Gramps upped the amount of cash he was letting me start with, it's why I can splurge so much on TM's and afford the car and the cheerleaders, they ain't cheap ya know."

"Not that it did much good against you huh?" he noted, "I'll have to keep an eye out for you at the Indigo League."

"If you manage to make it past the qualifying rounds and make it to the main tournament." I grinned at him again. An inside joke for someone who knew he originally didn't even make it to the top sixteen.

Gary snorted, "As if I'd ever get cleaned out like some scrub and not make it that far," he shook his head, "Heh, not that you'll need to worry about that, now that I've seen how tough the competition is, I'll just have to train even harder."

"And buy even more TM's." I added for him.

"Exactly," he laughed proudly, completely unashamed of his pay to win methods, "Next time I see you, it'll be me clapping your cheeks kid."

"I already told you, even if I was into dudes, I'm way outta your league." I shot back.

"We'll see Jordie-boy, we'll see." Gary snorted, then held his hand out to me for a handshake. I took it and shook his hand, hiding a smirk when he clasped my hand as hard as he could and then wincing when I did it in return.

This is what all that gravity training is for!

Well, beyond having awesome muscles to get pussy with.

Gary clasped his hands behind his back for a moment when we separated and plastered a smile on his face, "Actually, before I leave, gimme your number kid." he demanded.

"These muscles are just too sexy." I mock lamented.

Still, despite the mocking reply, I did just that, pulling out my phone and rattling off my phone number for him, and getting his in return. I saved it in my contacts under Gare-bear of course.

"Now, I'm off to drown my sorrows over my first ever loss as a trainer in the tits of my adoring gold digging cheerleaders," Gary grinned at me as he stowed his own phone away, then tossed me a two fingered salute, "Smell ya' later Jordie-boy!" he said, before leaving.

I watched him walk away, clicking his fingers at his cheerleaders to follow him back up the hill like loyal growlithe pups and back into the car. He smirked down at me as he hopped into the back seat, wrapping his arms around the shoulders of two of his cheerleaders, hands going to their breasts and greedily filling up his palms with their soft bosoms.

And then the red convertible sped away.

I stared after the sports car for a moment, "...At least I don't need to award him a beta male card." I sighed.

Thank fuck for that. I kinda like him, he's a funny guy and he's got great banter.

'...Hmm, I wonder if I just stole Ash's rival from him?' I thought to myself with a snort. I mean, he never added 'boy' to anybody but Ash's name in canon, and he just tossed me the iconic Blue's 'smell ya later'.

Heh, now I just need to find Paul and mop the floor with him and get him focused on me and I'll double cuck Ash of his rivals.

Probably for the best for them, considering Ash is pretty jacked up pokemon wise compared to his canon counterpart going by what Misty told me back in Pewter City.

Canon, what is that? Does it taste good?

Suddenly my eyes widened as I remembered something. "Oh shit I totally forgot!" I gasped, quickly whirling on my feet, drawing a confused look from Charmeleon.

My eyes went to Hilda and then immediately to her chest, "...Fuck!" I cursed.

"...You finally remember I'm here after getting caught up with your new best buddy and the first thing you do after looking at me is swear?" Hilda gave me another dry look, "What even is your damage this time?"

"Your shirt isn't wet and see through from the Rain Dance." I sighed in defeat.

Hilda palmed her forehead, "You growing up can't come fast enough."

A few days on the road quickly passed after meeting Gary. Despite what the games would have you believing, Vermillion City really was not anywhere close to Cerulean City.

I would have been quicker heading to Saffron City or Lavender Town. But Lavender Town did not have a gym as far as I know, and fuck going to Saffron City.

Sure, it apparently has two gyms according to what little I can find, a fighting type gym and a psychic type gym. But, the second one was the real problem.

And fuck going anywhere near that place until I either have an army of dark types, or Ash fucks up Sabrina.

The few days that have passed since meeting mister smell you later though, have been interesting.

Because for some reason, the guy keeps texting me.

I paused mid-sip of my lovely vanilla protein shake, now that I'm a millionaire, I can eat whatever the fuck I want after all.

The reason why I paused mid-sip, being the alert sound my phone gave off to signify a text.

Or rather, the short, sweet and crisp catchy tune I'd long replaced my alert sound with.

'You were thinkin' I died, bitch, surprise! I still got them double thick thighs-'

Since it was just a text and not a call, it only went through basically the first verse unlike my ring tone, but hey, still ear catching.

I reached into my pocket and pulled out my phone and opened up my texts. It was a picture of Gary, a fishing rod in hand with an unconscious Seadra dangling from the line.

-Just Caught A Seadra!- The caption on top read.

Then a split moment later, my phone vibrated as another message came through. Another picture.

-Now It's A Kingdra! Pay2Win Bitch!-

I rolled my eyes and snorted at the second picture. It was of Gary standing beside a pokemon floating in the air beside him, like Seadra it was a blue sea horse like pokemon, but this one was much larger, and in one hand, Gary held a up a bunch of TM discs between his teen fingers, as if they were weapons, hell his arms were crossed up over his chest pointing into the air, the fucker was outright dabbing at me in the picture.

He must have caught the Seadra a little while ago, loaded it up with TM's and then evolved it using a Dragon Scale, then probably loaded it up with some more.

Evolution in a lot of ways multiplied the original strength of the pokemon that evolved, so some quick boosts from TM's before evolving it would have been the smart play and what I would have done.

Huffing, I quickly replied, 'A whole lot of bragging for a guy who skipped going to Vermillion City after I whooped his ass to go for an easier gym, bet you don't have the stones to go after Sabrina.'

It was Gary who had informed me about the fighting gym in Saffron City being an actual thing and that there were a whole lot of gyms in Kanto beyond the main eight, it was only that the main eight were generally the stronger ones.

Sans Pewter City for the most part. Brock apparently had potential, but he had the responsibility foisted on him too quick and hadn't grown into himself yet, his father was the original gym leader.

And from what I did actually find of Flint on on the league website, I was actually really lucky to catch Brock instead of him. A shit head failure of a father or not, his known pokemon when he was the active gym leader was stacked.

Golem, Rhydon, Onix, Magcargo, Lunatone, Barbaracle.

And that was his old team, his profile hadn't been updated since he returned to taking over for Brock. So who knows what shit he has now, he probably has a Rhyperior at least.

But yeah, apparently, my kicking Gary's ass was enough for him to decide to not go to Vermillion and take on Surge and instead go after the weaker fighting type gym in Saffron.

He wanted to get stronger before taking on the main gyms. Which is funny, because you won't see anyone with a Kingdra playing through the games deciding they need to wait before taking on gyms.

My phone vibrated again as Gary replied, 'Heh, I'll smell your salty tears from all the way over here once you go get your shit put in by Surge, he's on a whole other level from Brock and those slutty sisters in Cerulean.'

Hey now, that was rude. Only one of them was a slut. I actually quite liked Lily, she was pretty cool in our battle and pretty tough.

'Again, tough talk for somebody who didn't bother battling those sisters.' I replied.

From what he'd told me over the past few days, the only one of the main eight gyms Gary had went after, was the Pewter one and only because of the leader being Brock and not Flint.

When the only reply he sent was an emoji of a middle finger being stuck up, I smirked and put my phone back in my pocket.

And immediately lost my smirk and sighed.

Flint wasn't the only leader I'd looked into lately. I'd checked the profile for Surge just the other day. If Flint's team was kind of stacked, then Surge's was the full on whooty booty of electric squads.

On top of that, Surge had way more than just six pokemon. He had a few that stood out above the rest, but he had dozens of pokemon. Dozens of Voltorb, Pikachu, Magnemite and shit.

But the main ones that stood out above the rest?

Raichu, Alolan Golem, Ampharos, Electrode, Magnezone, Manectric, Jolteon, Laturn and fucking Electivire of all things.

I already had a rough idea of who I was gonna pick for the battle. The most definite being Pidgeotto. We've been working hard since I taught Clefable Thunderbolt to steal that technique for grounding electricity using steel type attacks that Winona used in the anime and we've made amazing progress.

Surge from what I saw, favoured three formats of battles. One on ones, two on two's and three on three's. Mostly, he went with one on ones and two on twos. As far as gym leaders went, he had by far the most wins against challengers. From what I could see, he a lot of the time had multiple one on ones per day, most of them being left up to his Raichu who toasted pretty much all challengers.

I'm banking on a one one one. But, if it's two on two, then I want to use Graveler. And if it's a three on three, I'll use Shiftry as well.

But first, I wanted to evolve Graveler to make sure I secured my win. The problem being, I was having trouble doing that.

Sighing, I leaned back where I was sitting against a tree and took a gulp of my protein shake.

I had no idea how to go about trade evolving pokemon. It wasn't like Graveler was an Onix, which then only had to have a metal coat used on it to evolve. He was a legit trade evolution pokemon, no item required.

…And no matter how much I looked into things, there wasn't anything about pokemon evolving through trades anywhere on the internet or in the pokedex.

The most I could find at all, was a reference that Kadabra needed a massive build up of energy to facilitate its evolution into Alakzam. But, that still left me completely blank on going about it. Was it an outside source of energy needed, a build up over time of accumulation or training, or just pure strength gain?

I probably wouldn't worry over it quite as much right now, if it wasn't Surge. It didn't matter what adaption it was. Game, manga or anime. Surge was a cunt. A cocky, mocking punk ass cunt.

Losing at anything to guys like that, was the worst. All of my opponents can tell you that from experience.

"What's got you so down in the dumps?" Hilda asked as she finished up packing away her tent finally.

As always she was up much later than me. So until she was ready to go, I've just been doping myself up on sweet sweet protein for my lovely sweetheart Chansey to use later.

You see, my protein shake is not just protein powder and milk. Nor even is it just protein powder and moomoo milk. Mixed in, is a product only one such as I have access to.

A Chansey Egg. Not the reproductive kind, nasty, but rather, once a day Chansey produces an egg in her pouch, full of amazing vitamins and heaped full of vitality in actual energy form or something to that degree.

Do you know what that means? Let me simplify it in a simple mathematic equation.

Protein Powder + Momoo Milk, the best and healthiest milk I've ever come across + Chansey Egg = These muscles are full of win.

I only really came across the benefits of Chansey's eggs just after leaving Cerulean when I topped up on the good shit like Moomoo Milk. But even in that time span, I've noticed my gains are even greater than ever, my muscles are the muscles that will make even Machamp weep in envy.

And even better. I've grown. I mean, that is obvious going by the age of this body and all. But, I've grown too much. A whole two inches since I started this journey already. That probably doesn't sound like a lot, but I was already five-one when I arrived here in this younger body, now I'm five-three.

Now, let me tell you my friends. I hit my max height by fifteen, it was just a bit under five-six. I was a manlet by every definition of the word, a proud awesome manley with a big honkin' cock, but a manlet nonetheless.

If this keeps up, I'll shoot right by my original full height. And, it's all thanks to Chansey. For you see, not only is her egg so amazing, so is she. When using heal pulse on the body, she can actively use the nutrients and shit in the body to stimulate the body as well.

Well, to simplify it for the dumb fucks. It means I'm gonna be a juggernaut baby.

With a big honkin' cock.

Clefable may have Heal Pulse, but she can't do shit like that. The Chansey line are pretty special when it comes to healing, and I love her more and more each day.

"Trying to think on how to evolve Graveler," I put all that out of mind for the moment and replied to Hilda with a shrug, "The most I can figure out is he needs some massive store of energy to trigger the evolution or something like that, but I've no idea how to go about that."

"Oh?" Hilda tilted her head, before her eyes widened briefly and she laughed, "Oh! That's right, you never went to a normal school never mind a trainer school right?"

"…The hell has that got to do with anything?" I gaped at her. Did she just randomly want to make fun of a poor kid that never went to school?

I mean, it's a lie, but wow, brutal. I didn't know she had it in her. What's next, is she gonna make fun of mentally retarded people?

"Heck," she shook the cable in her hand, "It was this exact thing I used for it."

Huh. I don't think Hilda would lie to me about this….but at the same time. It sounds so stupid. Like, at face value, I kind of get it.

…But it's a fucking cable cord man.

Then again, in some cases, people and pokemon have been able to share energy and shit without even that much really. Like Z-moves and Mega Evolution. At least a cable directly connects the two.

But still, a cable man.

Well, whatever. "I'm just not gonna bother questioning the stupidity of it all," I shrugged and stood up, "So how do we do this?" I asked.

"Just send out Graveler and another pokemon and have them hold on to both ends of the wires, the pokemon transferring the energy should hold on to this end though." Hilda explained and held out the cable to me, showing one end that had a little arrow pointing inwards through the cable towards the other end in bold red.

"And if it isn't enough?" I asked.

"Then switch to another pokemon," Hilda shrugged again, "You're not just limited to one pokemon y'know?"

Huh. Well, alright then. I reached for my belt and grabbed two pokeballs, quickly bringing out Graveler and Pidgeotto. there's no doubt after all, that Pidgeotto is my strongest pokemon as of right now.

A little bit of explanation and minutes later, and I bore witness to perhaps the stupidest thing I've seen since I got here.

And I've met a ginger scrub called Cross.

The sight? Graveler and Pidgeotto standing at opposite sides, each holding an end of a cable in their mouths.

Stupid, oh so stupid, it was really so so damn stupid and cringe looking. I could lose cool and manly points for th-

My internal cringe was cut off by Graveler erupting into familiar bright light and beginning to change shape.

Cringe, oh so cringe. But Arceus fucking damnit. It actually worked.

And mere moments later, my Graveler, became a badass sturdy Golem.