Tok, tok, tok, tok-ko-tok, tok-ko-tok.

I've returned to my natural state of lazing around all by myself. Well, I guess it's technically 'myselves' now. Not that the sort of undead, sort of living proto-Ais is very talkative though.

Tok, tok, tok, tok-ko-tok, tok-ko-tok!

I drum the table with my fingers bit more forcefully, and then stop.

Ais is not very satisfied.

Oh, just to be clear, that's not because I went and read the message from creator god that showed that this world is not just shitty, but unfinished, broken, AND shitty. It's not like I wasn't thinking along those lines all along.

Neither is it because of my complete abandonment of doing anything angel-like would depress me. I didn't find any reason to bother, especially because I don't particularly need essence for the angelfire power I now have. Even as a soulless golem proto-Ais still holds enough power to torch the whole continent, so all that can be delegated to her.

However, since I'm not busy running stupid errands anymore I've had time to get used to living in this world. And with that came the realization... the realization that there's hardly anything of interest for a person used to high technology like myself.

Life in the Mud Ages is just too damn BOOOORING!

"I want interneeeeeeeeet!"

Slam! I hit the table with my fist.

"A what now~? Ais wants to catch inter-fish~?"

Just as I am about to snap, Celica walks in like the owner. Which she is not, since this is my house under the name 'lady Aisen'.

"Ready~ to stop holing up~ now? Big sis~ has super plan to liven you up~! Even if Ais went and turned into~ that horrible 'angel' thing, sis is still thinking of Ais' best~!"

Celica is chirping so energetically I can't even answer her.

She wasn't much shaken when she found out about my sudden change. In fact, she smugly acted as if she had known all along. That doesn't stop her from trying to corrupt me though.

She's the odd-one out of all the demons. I'm not sure if it's some deeply rooted existential dread or just tales of the ancient 'Great Destroyer', but feathered wings really freak them out. The demon lord even fainted when I and proto-Ais came to visit for the first time, muttering 'No, not two of her...!'. That was rather annoying of him, so I doodled 'compensating something? lol' on his huge sword's scabbard and left.

"You can bring Twice-Ais too~!"

That's apparently today's nick name for proto-Ais. She/it is dusting my furniture in imperial maid's outfit with her trademark blank expression.

Unlike my class-change to angel, the golem made of my corpse (really) was a real surprise to her. As was the precautionary command 'gut-punch any auburn-haired succubi who so much as touch you' I had set up with proto-Ais. That is hardly enough to stop this blockhead from trying it anyway though.

"Celica, your idea of fun is incompatible with mine."

"Owwww~, don't be like that~."

Even more so now that I'm not a succubus.

But... what would be fun for me then? Ugh. If only this world were about 1000 years more advanced, I wouldn't be having this problem--

"HA!"

"Eee~!?"

My sudden exclaim makes Celica pounce, but never mind that. I have the answer! It doesn't need to be 'if only' - it can be 'when'.

"Celica..."

"Yeeees~?"

"I'm going to sort of conquer the world. Don't make a mess here while I'm gone."

"Ais, what are you saying~?! ... Big sis~ is coming along of course~!"

-- 20 years later --

This is temple of Ais. It's very important in place, being the center of the wonderfully named Aisian Republic. This place is well known by all the citizens of the former druidic clans and empire, and also favourite holiday destination of many dark elves. All those people just love to come here to gawk at me.

Like that snot nosed brat currently picking his nose.

Seriously, don't pick your damned nose in the one place with something even remotely holy in this doomed world plagued by demons and dark magic and those catchy bardic songs that are actually just long streams of euphemisms for porking.

Geh. And now he ate it? Alright, I've had it. It can all go. I'M BURNING IT ALL. Apocalypse now!

"..."

No, I need to keep eyes on my end goal, the goal for which I have chosen to tolerate the tedium of associating with these dullards. Patience is the word of the day.

This is a far cry from how I expected things to play out when I gained angel wings. Back then I had even dared to get carried away and reconsider my long time policy of apathy. That resolve was over in matter of minutes though, and then summarily double tapped when I had revelation that from the creator god. ...What a joke that was too.

Right, about that message... Previous time I read that, back during my first incarnation, it was devastating to say the least. For many thousands of years I had been tirelessly doing what I thought was for the best, stretched the saying 'ends justify the means' to the nearest star and back, waded in seas of blood for sake of it all, and... and...

Laa-di-daa~, let me point out that technically it was a different person that killed a billion people. You wouldn't expect someone to take responsibility for something they did ages ago in their past life, now would you? So, anyway... that zealous angel of purity (that can be hardly said to be me) was then suddenly faced the fact that this world was created half-arsed and then summarily abandoned.

I'm not sure what exactly happened during the following mental implosion my first incarnation had, but it doesn't really matter now. After all, not much later the critical flaw of this world - namely the maximum population cap that angels could bear - kicked in and fucked up everything regardless. As a result the goody good angels turned into the first demons, and the less goody good proto-Ais had a little identity crisis lasting until just recently.

As to why that kind of reversal happened... while the exact details are muddled into myths within myths, I with my peerless perspective can now hazard a guess. I believe it was a sort of underflow error ergo when something becomes too big and it goes the other way around, becoming the smallest possible. Like Nuclear Gandhi in Civilization, basically. ...I can totally see that happening with a creator god that can't even be bothered to correctly type his change log.

That's not the only thing I now see in new light. The contents and manner of the creator's message raised another nasty question... a question of whether this world is even real. Yep, even some scientists think that because a) the number of simulated worlds ought to far exceed the real ones and b) therefore being inside a simulation is the more likely case. I can say with conviction that I would find it really demotivational to just be a part of some crappy virtual world.

Ironically, therein lies the answer I ended up with though.

Who'd waste power and computation hardware to run a shitty simulation like this? Even if the 'creator god' is a morbid person who'd like that, I think they at least wouldn't have half-assed it like this if they actually intended to run the simulation. So, this is the reality. Mud-stained and crappy and real reality. ...There might be holes in my argumentation, but let's not try to have an existential crisis here.

Right, enough of all that metaphysical shit. I'm new Ais and instead of navel-gazing I focus on the future! I have a purpose, one far greater than some stupid ideology. I shall play this part until my new world order is--

"Your holiness, an important matter has come up..."

I suddenly awaken from my thoughts - I had almost forgotten that I'm having a popularity rising session going on right now. Out of the mass of people who maintain minimal respectful distance, a group emerges addressing me thus.

'Your holiness' hardly fits me though. Never mind that it makes me sound like a pope, I'm not even sure whether it's insufficient or too much to describe me...

I glance at my carbon grey wings while thinking about this. I guess you could call me a semi-fallen angel now.

My genocidal nut-case first incarnation has lighter colored wings than I do now, by the way. Supposedly it mirrors your inner darkness or how fallen you are, not the actual actions. I'm not sure what to think of that, really.

The group addressing me now doesn't know or care about that though, for it belongs to one of the leaders of the republic I created. Originally I set it that thing up so they'd govern themselves, leaving me to draw the larger picture without being burdened by mundane stuff. That was the idea. As for its realization... I somewhat underestimated my popularity, and now they ask my guidance in everything regardless. The amount of micromanagement I face is simply mortifying...

As for whether this Aisian thing is a religion or not... I guess so technically, although the concept of religion is rather thin in this world. Most examples are just cults revolving around a person of importance or loose philosophies. Frankly, I feel more like an idol than anything else the way things are now. Some people have even asked for autographs from me - I have no idea where they got that idea.

"Fineeee. RECEPTION OVER. Come gawk some other day."

The mass of people drift off, but none of them seem put off by the dismissal. For reasons I don't understand my popularity and influence is really high among the general population. I mean, that one time I jokingly said 'remember to jump everywhere to level your acrobatics skill', it became an awful mess.

Maybe it's some natural trait of angels' to be taken well by receptive people, but the tale of my ascension was really underwhelming series of events as well. The mythical 'Great Destroyer' intimidatingly hovering near me might have played a part as well.

It started with meeting the high druids. There were few less of them, but the rest had been rescued from the cave of theirs that Celica blocked during our attempt to assassinate them (let's not speculate what happened to the missing ones...). Short story shorter: it raised some very complicated emotions in them, but a few pillars of fire from the skies later there was no doubt I was the fabled founder of their order. They had little choice but to fall in line.

As the next step I met the demon lord and 'asked' him to break his deal with the empire. With that preparation I had a little meeting with the generals in charge of the now demonless demon-summoning empire where they agreed that merging with druidic clans would be great, and by the way, nice wings, lady Aisen.

Thus the largest nation in known world was created with methods not far off from shaking nerds for lunch money. Well, there was a civil war and few rebellions afterwards, but mostly it went without a hitch and I totally could have continued from there. I'm glad I didn't get carried away though. Managing even this much is enough of a pain in the ass.

The crowd of people in my great hall disperses. After the only ones left in the room are myself and the delegation from the republic's defense ministry, I lay back on the sofa that I declared as my holy throne and bid them to state their business.

"So, what is it this time?"

By the way, inventing potato chips was a high-priority subgoal. I've been enjoying them, and the fact that angels can't get fat, ever since that was achieved.

The men from ministry look at each other and after a short pause the minister himself speaks.

"Your holiness, we have finished setting up the sirens on the key coastal locations."

Just this? Oh, and he means creature sirens instead of the device sirens. Though I guess both kinds make loud noises?

Sirens of this world are the usual rip-off mermaids that lure sailors to their deaths with their voices. They were work of some deranged flesh magician of the past - for some reason those flesh mages just love mixing human-parts with animal-parts. Such lazy designing, really.

Sirens are pretty cost-effective coastal defense system. My first choice would have been to implement surface-to-surface missiles using wind magic enchantments and Dwarven explosives, but that turned out to cost more than a small nation's budget per launch. I really liked the idea, but sadly it was too impractical, so an alternative was required.

"Great. But make sure they won't spread out of bounds."

"Understood, your holiness. Ah, also, there's the matter of borderlands patrol budget--"

He's interrupted by a shrill voice. Not a siren though, just an annoying elf.

"Quit bothering her with your mundane matters already!!"

"But high priestess, this is important--"

"IS NOT! GO AWAY!!!"

It was probably her crazed look rather than her position as my priestess that repelled the politicians. Regardless, they quickly scamper out, leaving the large, grand hall empty save for myself and the elf.

"Mistress!! I did good, right!?!"

Silvana, who became a high priestess by being my first and the most fanatic follower, reverts to her old self. I have trained her enough to stop people from bothering me too much, but sadly her consideration doesn't apply to when she's the one bothering me. She's one of the people closest to me currently, so it can't be helped, I guess.

The other priestess in this temple is that dark elven girl Ellysa whom I met in their continent. It turned out that the cult one of my incarnations started among elves was still functioning there, and through her they discovered my 'return'. Hence the elven pilgrims coming from far away. She and Silvana have a surprisingly respectful rivalry going on. Neither has even successfully murdered the other one yet.

There's also that knight Inwell, who though bit old now, seems to persist in fancying himself a holy paladin of Ais. It was real pain in the ass to make him finally stop using ye olde butcherede language, but he turned out to be surprisingly sensible helper.

"Mistress mistress MISTRESS!!"

I tone out Silvana's voice and think about my grand plan.

I was content to do absolutely nothing for sake of the world. With the appearance of proto-Ais golem I thought I didn't need anything more, and with the secret of this world uncovered and unimpressive, I saw no reason whatsoever to exert myself.

But... I was wrong. There was one more thing that was necessary. Something without which life is simply hollow. I'm talking about the internet of course.

Yes! Only reason why go this far was because of my humble wish... a wish to steer this civilization towards path of the internet (and other quality of life inventions). This civilization has been stuck in a rut for far too long. Why haven't they got over it already? I know the reason for that too.

Magic. Oh, and insufficient interconnectivity of civilizations stalling the exchange of ideas. But mostly magic.

Magic system here relies on individuals' intuition rather than properly teachable skills. As soon as someone masters it, they are already old enough to have one foot in the grave. It's a dead end offering too obvious answer to various demands. Want running water in your house? No need to think about plumbing networks or pumping or water sources, magic can solve it*! *And it'll only cost about twice as much as the rest of the house.

Distraction as it is, I won't go so far as to outlaw magic though - I've played Dragon Age, I know that won't work. But I did conclude (not at all because of my continuing, spectacular failures to do anything constructive with it myself, nope!) that investing in it isn't worthwhile. It's flashy and handy when you want to destroy something with chaotic whirpools of elements or create overtly expensive gimmicks, but it's a shortcut rather than the real path. Also, a magic internet usable only by wizards would be awful, for certain.

And so I shall drag this world kicking screaming into the age of technology. For sake of funny cat pictures I'm guiding the unwashed masses towards a better future!

But alas, it has been a slow and thorny path.

"Siiiigh."

It has become clear that these humans aren't going to start renaissances any time soon. Actually, the only time they do show intellect and cunning is when it comes to killing people (especially dwarves, poor dwarves)... I half-considered manipulating them to declare war on everyone and see what advancements they come up with, but I guess starting the first world war of this world for sake of my boredom would be tad too un-angelic of me.

So, what about elves? Considered and denied. I have this notion that they are all incurably perverse. Each and everyone. That Silvana wasn't an outlier, but the norm. ...Well, I might be being a little unfair there. The sample I have is not very representative, since it's mostly just cultists willing to even cross an ocean to come here in belief that I'm some sort of love goddess (courtesy of one of my earlier incarnations).

And the dwarves? They made rude gestures and shouted that I smell of granny pants while firing ballista bolts at me when I tried to approach them. I forgive them though. They have gotten the short end of the stick pretty much forever, so being little short on hospitality is given. I'll have cultural victory over them when they realize that everyone else has super sweet modern appliances and they still live in damp holes.

Oh, naturally I considered doing it by myself at first. Someone else would get it wrong. But... while I know the end products, even my great wisdom doesn't include every necessary step in transition from iron age to digital age, never mind operating all the necessary infrastructure. Take for example gunpowder... I know it has saltpeter and sulfur in it... but where do you get those? Sulfur from volcanic area, sure, but saltpeter? I think it had some connection with cesspits and fertilizers, which are also connected to explosives. But even an immortal has no time to experiment with literal shit in hopes of taking one little step towards modern world!

All I can do right now is to force feed the next generations all the knowledge so far, and hope they work it out for me. I created a packet with basics like theory of gravity and calculus for them to kick start it. It's currently the best seller, though most people treat it as some kind of abstract poetry rather than learning material. In spirit of my first incarnation I even threatened to burn down everything unless they make public schooling mandatory for all asap. I'll teach them my enlightened ways with brute force!

My plan will take a long time to come to fruition though...

"Your holiness, I'm back!"

"Ignore that wench, mistress! All you need is me! "Verily, thine-- Ahem. Your holiness, your servant has completed the mission!"

"Hiya~! Celica dropped by too~!"

Ugh. They are multiplying.

Maybe I should leave dealing with this to proto-Ais and move somewhere far away for the next few decades...