《Evil Dragon on Paper》32. Ruth is Promised Riches
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“...women, men, money! Whatever you want! Virgins? You look like the type of person who would appreciate a good virgin!”
The draconic that was slipping through Sikes lips was making Ruth slowly lose his patience. It wasn’t the offers that were being made, just the horrible pronunciation.
Frankly, Ruth was the tiniest bit excited about the prospect of being given wealth. If he played this right he could probably negotiate for a large number of gemstones, or, if he really kept his cool, a large collection of brightly colored string. Ruth really missed his really long, brightly colored string.
The virgins and the men and women part left him slightly flummoxed, however. If Ruth decided to get minions to guard his future lair he supposed he would need to start somewhere. Being gifted minions sounded like a pretty good idea. Men or women didn’t really matter to him as he’d never been able to tell the difference. They wore those things over their bodies. At first, he had thought that the women were the ones that wore the brightly colored loose-hanging clothes and generally had long hair.
This theory had been dispelled when he had eaten a man who was wearing loose flowing garbs and had long locks of flowing golden hair. He had quite the voice. He’d also been trying to please Ruth with some sort of instrument after the people he came with had been melted into the floor.
To be honest, the man had been off-key, and Ruth more interested in the instrument with strings than he was with the man’s singing. It was also quite amusing to Ruth that the man had been in the company of three or four knights who had tried to kill him. Was the singing gold-haired man guilt-free because he’d stood in the back and watched? Hardly.
Ruth missed that instrument. It made little twanging noises when he tapped it against the ground.
The virgins part though? Was that important? Was there some sort of prestige if they were virgins? Did they taste better? Perhaps they were better at organizational skills?
Ruth thought back to his own experience with adventurers. He thought about it a great deal when he was a dragon because it was always a notable occasion. He’d eaten quite a number of them when they tried to attack him, steal from him, or exterminate him -- had he noticed any discernible difference? Surely one of them had been a virgin?
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No. Ruth mentally shook his head. He hadn’t really noticed any difference. Virginity must be something he wasn’t cultured enough to understand at the moment. Not that he would admit it to anyone.
Ruth silently vowed to make sure he only employed virgins from here-on-in. If anyone asked about it he would curl his lips upward in a sneer and pretend he knew something they did not. Ruth liked this idea very much.
It would be nice to have someone around to pick up the string or maybe lay it out in a decorative manner.
Ruth’s face became stony once more as he remembered his hoard was gone, and with the hoard, the string he had meticulously gathered.
Moment of silence for the colored string. His eyes began to narrow dangerously. That bastard wyvern…
↢↦
Bereft of hope for so long, Sikes was a man in the desert who could see the oasis. Even he couldn’t believe the crap that was coming out of his mouth! Women? Men? Riches? Where would he even get those? Leaving aside the fact that finding a virgin adult in the Under Arch was a laugh…
Surely he could put together something when they arrived in Under Arch, but now? Tieflings and Devils were notoriously suspicious beings. If he couldn’t put something together to entice the creature and hook it from the start, chances were that it would just leave him here.
The worst part? He had just been trying to probe the Tiefling when it started to look like he had offended it. Tiefling? Yes, Tiefling! Definitely! Those horns, that eye saturation, the ashen-hued skin, the tail!
Sikes chose to think of it as a Tiefling.
If it was a Devil it would just play with him until he was dead.
↢↦
Ruth was brought back from his vengeful thoughts when the creature started to speak again.
“Pardon?” Ruth asked.
“What’s your name, my lord?” The charcoal skinned creature asked. There was a certain fervent light in his eyes. It was the kind of look that made Ruth want to take a step backward. Before he could do just that, the creature spoke again. “Are you a Tiefling?”
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“No,” Ruth said slowly, and then corrected the poor dumb creature. “I’m a Planar Tiefling.”
The creature went silent and then tapped itself on the chest. “I’m Sikes, a Durvgar from Under Arch.”
Ruth shrugged his shoulders. He pretended he didn’t give a damn. He was holding out for that brightly colored string.
“How should I refer to my lordship?” Sikes tried again.
“Ruth.”
“Truly an auspicious name! A name of power! In the known universe there is…”
“Stop,” Ruth shook his head. He had never really spoken at length with another person or creature before. It was already giving him a migraine pretending to care about this creature’s life story and opinion. What about Ruth and his life story and opinion?
↢↦
Things were looking grim.
Sikes had tried to start by introducing himself and learning the Tiefling’s name. He would make it a harder decision to leave him in the dark by telling Ruth a little about himself and letting him know that he was a person. Flattery seemed the best way.
When he started flattering Ruth, however, he’d been stopped almost immediately.
A cold sweat started to run down his back. If he hadn’t been so filthy it might have even traveled a bit instead of being stopped by the dirt and grit that had dried on his back.
“I see,” Sikes chuckled nervously. He did his best to stay on his feet and not sway. He was hungry, starving actually, and this was the most excitement he’d had in some time. “Can you perhaps tell me what happened to the Raccoon?”
“Raccoon?” Ruth gave no indication he knew what that was.
“He… it looked like this…” Sikes pantomimed some ears and then made circles with his fingers and put them over his eyes. “...he was full of himself and furred all over?”
“Oh. My clothes ate him,” Ruth admitted after a long moment of reflection. “Was he a friend of yours?”
“He was my enemy,” Sikes felt intense relief. Despite the fact that Ruth might leave him to die, at least that damn Raccoon wouldn’t be spreading misinformation with his ‘science’. “Wait, your clothes ate him?”
“I don’t like to talk or think about it.” Ruth looked so solemn and concerned that Sikes didn’t know what to think. “How about… your companion?”
“This is Lord Rush. He is a…” Ruth paused and his eyes started to drift upward in contemplation. “...lethal creature.”
“Is he your familiar? Your pet?” Sikes probed.
“No,” Ruth almost said it like it was a question.
So, a familiar of some sort or, worst-case scenario, an honest to gods soul shape, Sikes thought.
The chances of it being an actual soul shape were slim. The formation that the garden sits on top of wouldn’t allow anyone to awaken a soul shape. Hang on. He did say he was a planar tiefling? Maybe he’s not here naturally? Familiar or not, this was too much for him to handle with anything other than boot-licking.
“Well, what is your current destination?” Sikes asked tentatively.
“Don’t know,” Ruth replied. “I think I need to leave in case the Cannibal Pixies return. Also, everything above us has tried to eat me or kill me for no reason.”
Ruth was eyeing him with suspicion as if waiting for him to confess that he, too, was planning on such a course of action.
Sikes smiled nervously and licked his lips. “Well, maybe I can help you? Perhaps you can tell me a bit about your situation and we can plot a course?”
Ruth’s eyes lit up and he crouched down. Sikes did his best to casually make his way to a sitting position but almost fell down instead.
Ruth told him… everything.
Seriously.
Sikes nodded and smiled, gritting his teeth and trying not to be bothered by the fact that this story began when Ruth was an egg.
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