Chapter 10

It had suddenly occurred to me that with the ability to use magic, which is a way to override what is and what isn’t, there was little need to go about doing things the hard way. That is especially true since I could quite literally rewrite any part about me if I wanted.

Within my chest, I could feel my own [Soul Stone] hidden inside, unbeating. It contained everything that made me ‘me’, every thought I had and am having, everything single memory that was related to me and every [Presence] that the world knows of me. Easily, I could change some bit of it — make me smarter, more cheerful, more… human.

But you got apprehensions, don’t you?

In truth, it made me nauseous to even begin to consider it.

Of course, it would be natural for people to worry about changing. The same old fears of body horror, mind control and all those common phobias of surgeries had its effects on me just as much as it has on most people.

But given that, only the [Soul Stone] represents me. The mockery of flesh that I wrapped around myself was a compilation of rogue [Essence] that I had scavenged, killed and eaten — it’s not me. I could, if given time, quite possibly modify that.

To what extent? I had absolutely no idea.

It bears potentials.

It was also that thought that led me to this mess.

Have you ever seen something that seemed to exist between a rock and something alive? Not something like a stonefish or a turtle but something that is literally both a living creature and an actual rock?

You wouldn’t.

Why is that?

Because they will explode.

That was the mess that I was referring to. It was quite literal.

Saighgair number five met its fate splattering all over the packed sand as I attempted to merge it with a chunk of shell-encrusted stone. Apparently, attempting to merge two objects — the entirety of their [Essence] — without somehow tethering them together, they will attempt to occupy the same space at once.

It had occurred so quickly that I didn’t even have time to understand what happened. One moment there was a Saighgair, then in another second, there were pieces absolutely everywhere. I had thought that it was a fluke, so I tested it again just to see if it happens.

What occurred was as expected.

Several more experiment followed with similarly little success.

How removing a part of the [Form] can lead to the rapid, unplanned deconstruction of everything it was linked to.

How attempting to separate the [Soul] from the [Presence] would lead to, expectantly, death.

That obviously led to some rather disgusting results, and certainly disgusting enough that I wouldn’t even try to pick up the pieces. Aside from the body of Kilhus, the newly produced scattering of viscera was not helping the maintenance of the scenery.

Three things, I decided, are in order.

We need a change in scenery. We need some experiment subjects that would be less wasteful. We need some ideas on what to experiment on.

It would be pointless to waste materials, after all. Iasgairean would be difficult to come by, especially the two special [Soul Stones] that I had hovering about inside me. After a few rounds of experimenting, I was left with thirty-five Iasgaireans to play with.

Hoisting myself off the frosted surface, I roused myself enough to drift off to find a new area. The basin that I was in had hidden the surrounding area and rising slightly above it hadn’t helped a single bit since it appeared there was only more sand beyond us.

Considering a little bit, I reached for Saighgair number seven. A quick examination through its memory was enough to reveal the location that it had passed through recently before being consumed by me. From that point on, it was a simple task to backtrack through the paths it had taken.

Since the Iasgaireans Sanctuary was one of my goals, moving closer now wouldn’t be too bad a decision when all things were considered,

As I exercised my limbs, I considered.

Magic can override.

Magic, as shown by my own abilities, can also cut away [Essence].

Thus, all things considered, using magic should also be able to forcibly change something’s composition or meld them together. However, the process was much more in depth than I thought it would be as shown by the exploding fish people.

Or is it?

It is quite difficult, yes.

I would compare it to an exercise in imagination.

Try to imagine a circle, or perhaps a wheel, spinning in a pitch black void. Is it difficult? Attempt to keep the image stable — spinning slowly — just so that you can still see the spokes rotating and rotating.

A rough start, no?

You’ll get used to it.

Now, do this.

On the wheel, trace a pattern along its side. Make it a poem, saying Tiger tiger, brand each word into the wood so it would stay.

Can you still see it?

Could you still spin the wheel in your mind, with every single word of the poem clear and apparent? This was but one little bit of the [Essence]. What if there were more wheels, now intersecting with each other, crossing like inexplicable hoops that had no business functioning the way it does?

That was what it felt like, at times, concentrating into the imagination, tracing thoughts and concepts that tangled up like a spider web in the wind. It was so easy to get lost within your own head, going off in tangents in the way that a kite could be whisked away into the sky.

Miss just a little bit, you’ll get rock-encrusted innards.

But it wasn’t that there weren’t shortcuts.

The more I thought about the issue at hand, the more I realized that I had, in fact, been using magic for a while already. From the stupidly named {Auto-scale} that I came up with a while ago to the destructive {Breath: Incendiary} that I had unleashed on the worms, I had unwittingly been commanding [Essence] to do something that they probably wouldn’t be doing to force the Physical into doing something they shouldn’t be doing.

Effectively, these things were not too different from the magic that the Sgnirmah used. It was just a matter of application.

This was not only notable because these magical happenings didn’t need to be constructed from scratch again every time I used it, but also important since I hadn’t used any isolated [Essence] when constructing these mental commands.

Or had you?

They could have just appeared, you know. I am having new ideas, am I?

I mentally pursed my lips.

Elisa, you can’t put this off forever, you know.

Why shouldn’t I? Changing what makes a person is a big deal, no?

So what, you will avoid introspection just because you felt squeamish looking around your own [Essence]?

Obviously, yes!

Hypocrite.

Doesn’t make the worry any less valid, you know.

It really does.

…

As it went, I had avoided looking into my own [Essence].

After all, just how eager would anyone be if they were to look at their self, laid bare? Confrontation to all of their faults, weaknesses, hates and likes? All your little bits of worry, self-doubts and deepest, darkest thoughts?

Not many, I would reckon.

But yet, I did understand that putting off the process of introspection couldn’t possibly be continued for much longer.

Stop thinking and get on with it, Elisa.

Right. Stop thinking.

I glanced left and right — still an open expanse of sand. In the milky distance away, vague shapes could be seen sprouting from the dirt, suggesting a gradually rising landscape.

Or kelp.

Either way, I decided that getting some cover would be a great idea. While I doubt anything could really harm me in this state, it would be rather stupid of me to walk around with my proverbial pants down while my mind goes off to into a literary world of its own.

The swim itself did not take too long from my perspective. Repetitive paddling of fins and tail eventually brought me closer and closer, all together guided by the memories of Iasgairean number seven. At the same time, I gradually gain a minor understanding of the underwater locales, aided by pilfered memories.

The Sanctuary of the Iasgairean lies in some sort of watery ruins off the coast of… somewhere. The fish people, surprise surprise, weren’t too keen on keeping track of above-water landmarks. The ruins itself is situated within a canyon of sorts, pillars of ancient stone threading the two halves unto the bottom of the crevice like some sort webbing, protecting the temple-like entrance into the actual Sanctuary.

I read that with enough distance underwater, the light of the sun could no longer quite hold onto colours such as a red, leaving everything in hues of blue, green and grey. Yet, from what I could… feel, from them, I knew that it was red, it was more vibrant until the ocean stole the light away.

How odd.

Surrounding the Iasgairean sanctuary was the forest of kelp that I had emerged from and a little beyond that were plains of shorter plant life such as seagrass and stubby corals, before eventually transitioning into the open sea of endless sand. Words weren’t quite enough to describe underwater sceneries as English was hardly made for such uses.

At times, I cursed at my lack of language mastery, especially in a world where concepts hold power.

The ocean is surprisingly empty.

The more you know, I thought with a stray, irritated shake.

That didn’t mean that there weren’t the errant crab or two that scavenges the sandy floors though. In fact, it was clear that there is an entire biosystem at work here. It was simply that it had fallen short of my expectations as to what the sea should look like.

You got spoiled by books and TVs.

It would be stupid to assume that reefs exist everywhere and it was obvious in hindsight that they do not.

You know little.

We know little, I corrected myself.

But as it was, it seemed that the layout of the Iasgairean sanctuary was rather simple on the outside. Pillars. Sand. Ruined walls. A rough count would put them as three distinct little piles, separated with what once might have been streets before it all sunk under.

The classics.

I wondered what could have happened here — why was there a sunken city, here? What may have caused the entire town, for it must be, to be dragged deep into the sea? Was the settlement built around the crevice, or did it appear one day, cracking the earth open and submerging everything in a deluge of seawater?

Food for thought?

The Iasgaireans were just as clueless as I was, their furthest reaching memory laid half-forgotten, half confused with twisted thoughts of their less intelligent self.

Inside, according to my pilfered memories, was a veritable maze.

Even though I couldn’t navigate the mess of tunnels, it doesn’t mean that I couldn’t use an Iasgairean’s soul to lead my way.

I was optimistic for all of an hour until another problem showed up.

I had reached Sanctuary before I knew it.

The problem, however, wasn’t an interception from the Saighgairs. It was the shimmering, blue dome that stretches over the entire complex.

As a reminder, there were no colours in the [Beyond].

Is it even the [Beyond] anymore? I could clearly see a familiar territory.

Shush. Focus.

Colours that I could comprehend from the actual environment were second handed. Like reading a grey-tone paper with the word ‘Red’ written on it. Knowing its colour was simply not quite the same as seeing it — the same way I could tell it was day time now even with an absence of light.

But this blue?

It was the same stuff I had been seeing when I first awoke.

The [Beyond] variety of blue.

Red was hostile, green… passive?

And blue, I imagined, would have something to do with observation. Eyes and things like that were tinged blue, I remember.

Observation, or maybe the concept of keeping something safe?

Either way, it wasn’t a good sign — or expected. This dome wasn’t here in my memories, or perhaps it couldn’t be perceived by those that weren’t privy to the workings of the [Beyond]?

I cast my own eyes across the ruins. There was little motion to be seen, with only the barest shift of kelp in the currents, waving about.

Empty.

Desolate.

Quiet.

It wasn’t meant to be, I think.

Perhaps with the missing hunting party, they had holed up inside?

It wouldn’t be surprising.

But how long would they hole up in there, I wonder? Last I checked, they had issues with food supply.

No guilt?

Guilt’s getting a tad old.

Slowly, I approached the barrier. It was… familiar. I had seen something like this before.

When?

I pondered.

Ah! It was the priest and lackeys.

Father Bennet?

Yeah, him. He made that glow-dome-circle thing, didn’t he?

He did.

And it was fragile, but damaging.

This blue dome that was akin to a massive bubble seemed a tad more robust than that. No, the problem wasn’t that it is ‘tougher’, but the blue that tinges it.

Was it an alarm? A detection system? What sets it off? Does it respond with an attack?

I considered poking it.

No, let’s not touch it.

While I was confident I could simply rip a hole into it the way a mole can burrow into the dirt, I wasn’t quite certain if I could avoid setting it off if I were to touch it.

...Then don’t touch it. You don’t need it to observe.

You may be onto something here. I exclaimed mentally as I hovered about, glancing at the dome. If I could look at things I’ve captured as [Soul Stones], there should be little reason why I couldn’t look at it from afar.

What even is range when it comes to conceptual entities?

Not much… You know what, hold onto the thought. That’s an entirely different can of worms that I don’t want to deal with now.

So instead, I squinted, abandoning that particular train of thought for now.

All four of my eyes glared.

I waited.

Nothing much happened.

Not too sure what I expected.

Should I try creating an ‘ability’?

Uh…

It would help, wouldn’t it? Things like {Puncture} worked better than they had any rights to, so why shouldn’t this?

We got a huge list of things already, don’t we?

And what’s the problem with a few more?

Its… Well, we don’t even remotely know how it all works!

Judging from how these things worked in the past, it seemed like giving certain activities a name, a ‘label’, or so to speak, would make it… more. More, as in it worked closer to whatever it was intended to do. As such, my [Spear] tentacles can utilize a variety of things such as {Impale} and {Puncture}, each demonstrating different ability despite identical actions.

Besides, the thought of just creating a new [Ability], as I should call them now, left me feeling an odd sensation.

I couldn’t quite put into words what I felt about it, but it was an oddly reluctant feeling, almost bordering on disrespectful. It was the kind of feeling that one would get when you casually override reality or accidentally do something better than a professional at his own field first try.

Not that I actually experienced it, of course, but one can use their imagination freely.

But as it went, it was strange.

And completely illogical as well, so I ceded the field to alternate me.

Fine. Have it your way. I sulked.

What should we call it? I suggest ‘observe’.

Eh… That’s not what we need, is it?

Why not?

Words have power, and naming it something weird would give bad results.

Does it really?

We have been lucky so far, as “smash” can only have so many connotations that, outside of lingo, meant something that is decidedly not the act of destroying an object. Observe means seeing something, looking for something abnormalities. We would want something that’s more specific. Maybe ‘analyze’?

Perhaps a bit too… deep into results? Not enough information intake?

Oh really?

Yeah, analyzing assumes you already have data, right? We want something that can also help us look for things like the aforementioned ‘observe’ would.

So, a mix between them? Observe and analyze?

Precisely, I stated to myself.

How about Appraisal then?

…

It sounds professional, I hoped.

Let's go with that. Sounds rather posh.

And so, I focused. I am not quite sure how this works, but as I had done something similar in the past, I should be able to do something similar… right?

Maybe.

With my eyes closed, my mind funnelling into an isolated pool, I thought of ideas of knowing, trying to frame the nebulous concept into words as I fell, gradually and slowly, into a meditative trance.

I want to know more.

I want to understand.

I want to judge.

I want to observe and analyze, both.

With each word, now for the first time, I was so fascinated aware of the process that went on inside my own brain, tangible in a way that it wasn’t in the past. I felt as metaphorical strings that were more real than they had any right to be popped into existence, weaving through the thoughts that I had just so recently thought of and tying them up like ropes

The strings, I knew even without seeing, shining in [Glow], gradually took on a bluish hue, signalling its transition from a perishable thought into something else. Something more, something so much more real. I shuddered as I felt it twitched and grew, turning about and tethering to different parts of my psyche beyond my current scope.

And in the centre of it all, was a single word.

I spoke out loud, “{Appraise}.”

Something snapped into place at the word, like a hitched breath finally released, a tension that I hadn’t realized I had been building. The strings between fleeting thoughts and ingrained knowledge, all tied up together like how a sweater pills up in a washing machine, creating these fuzz balls that were just so obvious.

It was an [Essence] construct that was complicated — perhaps even more so than my body-sculpting efforts. It was a poem, an essay, a play, a piece of music, all blurring together word by word and note by note.

I had little time to ruminate on the success however, as my eyes suddenly took in.

And I knew.

And I understood.

Not dramatically — not yet, at any rate. Even as tangible as the newly christened {Appraise} was, it was not some spell that would force information into my head. It was merely an action made greater than what it was.

But it was something.

And with its aid, I gained information about the dome before me just by seeing it. With a little Ding! In my head, or so I imagined it to be.

That’s also when I knew that I did not have even the slightest chance of passing through unseen as I was just now.

The dome, as I now understood, was indeed a ‘ward’ that would alert its creator when a creature crosses over the limit while actively repelling any who weren’t. How it could even differentiate microorganisms from things like fish or spirits was beyond my understanding — at least with what I myself understood of the [Beyond] at any rate.

Or perhaps it doesn’t?

Furthermore, it was complicated. An extremely complicated jumble of inhuman concepts that exceeds my ability to express. It was a mass of ideas about protection weaved into the idea of owning a territory, along with knowing everything that passed in or out. That made as much as sense to me as watching a series of code on a screen in an entirely different language and syntax.

I sincerely doubt that I could rip a hole in that without alerting the Sgnirmah, as I am a … being that is on the dome’s blacklist.

As it went, unless I accept that I could alert the Sgnirmah to my presence, I could not venture forth.

God damn.

I kept a copy of that memory tucked away, however. Maybe I’ll understand how it works in the future.

Well, that’s a bust.

Unfortunate.

…

So shrugged my hypothetical shoulders before moving a ways from the dome, sit down in a distant, rocky trench and thought.

Uh uh, Elisa.

What?

Didn’t you say you were going to do some heavy-duty introspection?

But the dome…?

No escaping, Elisa.

Darn it.

I thought I could forget or keep my mind off it just by doing something else.

Another odd part about memories, that I’ve noticed, is that it couldn’t quite be forgotten in the same way as most do. Unless it is spent or overridden by new ones, they wouldn’t fade at all. They sure weren’t at the forefront of my mind, but I could find myself recalling small things, inconsequential things when I reached for it.

Like drawers, cabinets, full of files in convenient reach.

Though I suppose that was to be expected with how [Essence] behaves.

I breathed deep — kind of. Not much of a lung to fill, and satisfaction to help curb my nerves at the thought of looking inward into my own head.

You can do this, Elisa. I encouraged.

It’s fucking dangerous! I argued back with a hiss.

Of course not. It’s just self psychoanalysis. People do it all the time!

That's very different! This is like shoving a plug into your own brain and gambling it on the power of prayer!

It's not like that.

How is it not?

We are just looking!

What it goes into a loop? What is it called again, recursive loops? We look at ourselves looking at our own selves, which was also looking at ourselves and it just keeps on going?

...We are not machines, Elisa.

I beg to disagree.

“Stop coming up with excuses and just do it. If you aren’t going to do it, I’ll have to resort to drastic actions.”

It was a drama within my head. My serpentine body sat still, forgotten momentarily as my attention turned inward. I felt, however mysteriously, angered. Embers of forgotten fire rising in a heart that I no longer had, flaring up with an unexpected intensity.

“Resorting to threats now, are we? Real mature.” I thought back.

“I’m not going to just sit by, ignore problems and hope they go away, pal.”

“And you will rush us toward our doom!”

“Don’t be stupid and just do it. There’s no other way forward and there’s something fucking serious wrong with our head!”

“Wow, you just realized? Never thought that I’m an idiot but you are seriously pushing the line.”

“That’s enough, Elisa.” I snapped.

“And what are you gonna do, hm?”

...

“Giving you a time out, obviously,” I decided.

I decided.

Wait, what?

Then, my gargantuan serpentine head careened forward unbiddenly before smashing itself against the calcified rocks with a heavy thump. The impact tore a few scales off as my skull, seemingly beyond my control, scraped itself against the ancient barnacles.

“What the fuck are you doing? Are you crazy?” I yelled, immediately attempting to fix the sudden wound that had appeared, precious [Essence] drifting off and disappearing as it left my influence. Such a waste.

“Making new arrangements, you jackass!” While my roommate was distracted, I hurried and burrowed deep.

“Stop it! Stop!”

Obviously, I didn’t. Taking advantage of the distraction, I looked deeper and deeper. Gradually, a web, soft, yielding, appeared in my mind, its synapses flashing wildly as I peered at the makeup of my thoughts, a disharmony coursing through every thought as I struggled to stop myself from making deeper.

“You are going to kill us both!”

In the nebulous entanglement of [Essence], stuffed deep within the [Spirit] was my mind. And also, another me. Two glowing mushes of ideologies, each trying their hardest to tear control from each other. Amongst the shamble of me, my consciousness shone like a pair stars, revolving around each other with open hostility.

Both of them were me —

Yet, there was quite a difference between them.

“No, I won’t.”

It was a lie. After all, we both knew of my intention. Oh God, what am I even doing?!

“What are you doing?! No —”

I hesitated for a moment. My mind wavered, torn as I, at the same time, found myself split between me and me.

“Don’t do this, please!”

I {Sundered} regardless, pushing through. I gasped.

My vision flickered as my mind caved in on itself.

“Something I should have done a long time ago.”

“Stop it. Please, stop!” I cried, primal fear coursing through me, almost breaking my concentration on the task. Heedless, I cut and I cut and I —

“Think about what you are doing! Please, I beg yo-adaasflds

aeRIBAb ga

Adafa n

A

Ha sj h

Ada

Snip.

Snip.

…

Ah.

“Its time out for you, Elisa. Hands off the fucking steering wheel.”

With an almost audible Pop!, something came off, disconnected. Something cracked, indistinct against the sudden absence of sensation that I hadn’t realized I had been feeling.

I tore apart, split.

Dizziness struck me, atop the entirety of my splintered self.

Then, slowly, inexorably, I floated, resurfaced, my cognition returned.

And at the same time, I wasn’t.

Quiet now.

All alone.

A breath of relief was had. Or perhaps it was a gasp.

Finally.

Life was difficult enough with only one voice in your head, and I really didn’t need a second one. The change was obvious.

Silence, no more voices that doubt every single action.

A glimmer, a shoot-off, from what once was me. Was I the original one? Or was it the now isolated, fearful fragment of me that I had torn off my psyche? Only someone, the person that we once were, could take self-hatred to such a level.

I wasn’t surprised by my actions — not at all.

After all, hadn’t I always wished for a better me? Out with the old, dingy Elisa that cower in fear, seeking approval and meaning for every action. With distinction, disparity, our voices, what was originally a voiced companion that I pretended had taken a life of its own. Different.

It took effort to trace our thoughts, to guide it along an unsuspecting path.

I had begged myself to do this, as I was unable to take action. So, given the chance, how can I not do it? Honestly, everything up to now had been leading up towards this event.

Now, we had split.

Me, Elisa.

Did we think that we would stay the same as always, wallowing in our sorry state?

Of course not.

Now, I’ve snipped her out of us. No more being an eldrich-y entity for her anymore, for now.

Me, Elisa, can be me, while she can just... hover about, I suppose.

"Get shit on, old Elisa!"

With a flick of my mind, I tied off the little strings that circled our mind, stemming the opening wound in our head. Next to my [Soul Stone] was a tiny nub, a cancerous tumour, grown and outlasted. It was rot, taking over like a disease until I fall apart. I dread to even think about how it would've turned out if I hadn't cut that decaying, self-destructive bit out. Now a prison for myself, or at least a version of what once was me as well.

She’s small.

Much smaller than I am, the whole of what once was us. If it were to be measured, it was even smaller than the Iasgairean.

Well, that is to be expected. It was just that little fragment, after all. A part born from a mishap of my imagination, or perhaps, existed before.

An inferior copy?

…

Whichever that came first or last was frankly is consequential. There’s only me, now.

And whatever that made me being able to do what I do.

I reminded myself to smile. Deep within my chest, a pair of lips curled up in familiar motions.

She understood. We both knew it was inevitable.

A clean, surgical fallout.

But I am all better now! My mind felt clearer than it ever did.

My core shimmered, a murky crystal globe of [Essence], having changed so much since I arrived here in the [Beyond]. Marred in patches, rough from how we had treated ourselves. How many memories did I lose?

I didn’t know.

But that was fine.

It went better than expected, to be honest, considering that this was equivalent to doing brain surgery with a chainsaw on yourself while you were conscious.

I did some emergency patches now, closing off the raw edges of our psyche. The rough cutting had been a speed job as I couldn’t quite afford to waste time, but now I had it all to myself.

With newfound glacial patience, I slowly smoothed out the wrinkles in us, keeping an eye open as I [Tugged] things back to where they came from. Carefully, I peeled the last remnants of the Other Elisa’s control over us and attached it back to me with {Linking}. No [Abilities], no moving for you now.

Everything’s where it should be.

With a final touch, I curled a new membrane of [Essence] around us. Around the core of ourselves.

I hadn’t drawn on our [Deposit] in a while but the process was just as seamless.

And this membrane, made with pilfered [Essence] from something else, I forced it to take shape. It crawled and grew, stretching in a grotesque fashion, creating an isolated room. In a flash, four-five hundred worth of this ghostly material was spent.

Expensive, but necessary.

With a flex of my will, I called it the [Safe].

There.

No more stupidity. No more accidentally burning up our own [Essence] when making things. Its lock and keys will be kept a secret, accessible only by me. Only then can we make changes.

See what I did there, little Elisa?

I’ll keep us safe.

But for now, the more human, irrational part of Elisa can sit somewhere else. You don’t have to take the blame, or the guilt now, aren’t you happy? You were such a nuisance.

She didn’t reply.

Elisa, now trapped in an isolated bundle of [Essence], struggled to even form a cohesive thought. Taken with a slight sense of pity, I pulled tentatively extended a single tendril of my body to her.

There, now you can see and hear.

My senses, eyes, touch, I would at least allow her to see through them.

I’m not murderous.

Mayhaps sociopathic now, under most ruling, I suppose.

But hardly cruel. Why would I be? She was me a few moments prior.

I’ll allow her our memories.

“Sit tight now,” I spoke out loud, my voice rumbling underwater as I righted myself. Around me — us, now, I suppose, I had carved a single trough of white, crushed stone and corals. It fluttered in the currents, destroyed in our struggle.

She wiggled. Waves of indignation flashed through the mockery of an embryo cord between us as she suddenly regained her self.

I ignored her.

Got more pressing matters for now.

Because even with just a cursory look through the [Soul Stone] that defined my core self, now refined, it was clear that taking a look was the best idea we ever had.

Huh.

A [Spirit] is split between the [Soul] and the [Presence].

Which, is the self and what the world see you as.

In particular, the [Soul] carries things such as memories, thought patterns and the such. In my opinion, it was an extremely important bit.

Which should decently explain exactly why I was incredibly concerned when I discovered that nearly half of ‘me’ wasn’t even me.

And even more concerning, I couldn’t affect it.

When I flexed my mind, when I [Tugged] on it, it remained resolutely impassive. I couldn’t even see it until just now when I targeted my attention upon it.

As if, for the first time, I found something that was solid. Like the core of a planet or the seed of a fruit, it sat still in the middle of my [Soul Stone], surrounded by my tumultuous mass.

In a flash of inspiration, I realized that I had just found the location of the thing that had, for whatever reason, been doing the heavy lifting. The strange, the weird part that had dragged me out of my death.

Now, the question was this.

Which one of us is the parasite?

I took a deep breath.

And I left it alone.

This question was pointless. If I couldn’t affect it now and it held the secret to being able to shape [Essence] like putty, I’m not about to carve it away or break it open. Thus, its only natural to put that particular question off until we got a lot more information.

“See, Other Elisa? We wouldn’t have known this if we hadn’t checked,” I sent the thought through our link.

She responded with a subdued resignation.

“Don’t worry too much. I’m not about to get rid of you.”

A spike of fear.

Well, it couldn’t be helped.

I swam out of the ditch with a mighty sweep of my tail.

The entire conflict and emergency constructions had taken hours, probably. Time was a hard thing to measure with how volatile and subjective it is. Despite the ruckus I must have produced, the giant blue dome still stood tall and firm, stretching above the entirety of the Iasgairean complex.

That’s fine.

I got plenty of time.

And now, better ideas and inspirations.

If the barrier only allows Iasgaireans in, then it means I must enter as one.

How ironic, it was their very makeup that gave me the idea.

In my belly still, thirty-five Iasgaireans laid silent, waiting. Plenty to do, plenty to test. With so much power at hand, it would hardly be responsible if I misuse it as I had in the past. With every understanding, my repertoire expands.

...

I don’t suppose that the idea of possession is out of fashion yet?

…

“No, Other Elisa, you don’t get to vote yet.”

Elisa's current list of things.

"Body" Parts [Abilities] (... if applicable) [Spears]: Three pointy chin tentacles, a must have. Don't touch the tip.

{Impale}: Stab things really hard. Probably hurts a lot.

{Swipe}: Swatting, whacking, whichever works.

{Puncture}: Also for stabbing things, but also allows me to drink up the [Essence] to speed things up a little.

{Smash}: For when stabbing things doesn't work quite as well and some brute force is needed.

[Feelers]: Four more tentacles. Thumbs not included.

{Lash}: A primitive flailing that did more than expected. First proper [Ability] I made. [Arms]: Arms and armour all in one. Made for handling things that need a little bit of toughness. {Smash}: Also smashing, but with [Arms] instead. [Breath Gland]: Dragon fantasy inexplicably turned real. Allows me to turn [Essence] into various volatile... projectiles?

{Breath: Cannon}: Blasts a solid-ish splatter of [Essence] out. Not quite sure how to aim it yet, but seems to do a lot of damage.

{Breath: Incendiary}: Set things on "Fire". Need to figure out how to put it out first, I think.

[Jaws]: For biting purposes. Big teeth included, not recommended for delicate uses.

[Stomach]: Where things are mashed to bits for better digestion.

[Stomach: Masher]: The afore-mentioned masher of things.

{Devour}: Swallow things whole without actually biting. Seems to extends range of my bite somewhat. [Eyes]: Got four of them. Doesn't need to blink. {Appraise}: Looks at things and get more information that I should with my so-so intelligence.

[Soul Stone]: All of Me. And some hanger-ons.

[Safe]: Keep me from accidentally burning through myself. Also prevents others from doing the same, maybe.

[Deposit]: A mass of mashed up [Essence], free to be moulded into more eldritch mush.

[Mysterious entity]: Appears to be the source of my powers. Somehow immune to itself. Go figures.

{Self-Mould}: My ability to, somehow, mess with [Essence]. Can make them into pseudo shapes while retaining their original property. Possible link to that chunk of unidentifiable [Essence] in my [Soul Stone].

[Human-Vocinator]: Allows me to speak.

[Face]: A substitute face for me to do facial expressions for my own sake.

[Lungs]: Breathing.

{Breathing}: It's a thing now. Shouldn't have done this.

[Torso]: and other things that are not included.

{Tackle}: Full body slam.

{Auto-Snake}: Makes more segments of my body.

{Auto-Scale}: Makes more scales.

Weird things (may not be mine) that should be included:

{Tugging}: Borderline telekinesis. Seems short-ranged.

{Sunder}: Tears formerly-intact [Essence] apart. Not quite sure on its range yet, but should not use willy-nilly as it is extremely powerful.

{Link}: Creates artificial connections between [Essence] bits.

{Tasting}: Figures out... things. Made it, used it, seemed to work like tasting, but for [Essence]. Makes more sense in my mind.

{Barrier}: Creates a sealed environment that prevents things from entering or exiting. Not too sure how it works yet, but "looping" seems to be one version of it.

{Path}: Does something with papers. Got a bread-crumb effect with dubious effectiveness.

{Light}: Creates light? May be a command word instead.

{Sanctuary}: Creates a shining barrier that, for some reason, is harmful towards me. Not fond of that.

{Release}: Make captures things pop out of their prisons. Can be applied by me to someone else's' stuff? Bears potential!

{Passive-aggressive-rant}: I do this a lot.

{Mosquito-kill}: I may do this.

{Shit-talking}: I don't do this.

{Suicide}: How do I get rid of this?