Chapter 21: The Stench of Unity

“Good morning, Lieutenant,” Captain Milo greeted with a friendly wave and a look that stopped Corbin in his tracks as he jogged up to the Garrison entrance. “Good to see you’re still standing.”

“Consultus,” Corbin greeted with a respectful nod. “Thank you—for yesterday.”

“Don’t mention it,” Milo replied with a sly grin. “I was actually waiting to inform you that your unit has assembled and is waiting for you inside.”

“Ahh,” Corbin nodded as he recalled the two drunk City Guardsmen he had met last night outside Fire Gullet. “Those two.”

Milo raised a brow. “Not just two, all seven, Lieutenant.” The Captain slapped the startled Guardian’s shoulder with a grin. “And I’ll be tagging along as well to see how well you handle them.”

Corbin blinked and nodded again as he followed the Duelist’s directions to a corner of the training grounds where three men and three women, all in their early to mid-twenties, rose from a bench to greet the approaching officers.

“Let’s start with introductions,” Corbin said briskly as he ran his eyes over them, quickly picking out the pair he had already met the night before. “I’m Lieutenant Corbin, your unit leader as of today. Guardian Class, Materia.”

He gestured to the oldest in the group, a man in his mid to late twenties, who had been the last to stand and greet them.

“Vincent,” the man replied as his blue eyes gave Corbin a sharp, assessing look. “Water Mage, Materia.”

“And I’m Jade,” replied the woman next to him with a stiff nod. “Earth Mage, Materia.”

“Are we not doing last names?” Asked a young blonde woman next to Jade, who appeared closer to Corbin’s age. “Well then—I’m Clara. Duelist, Materia.”

The pair Corbin met at the Fire Gullet glanced at each other before Joel stepped forward with a slightly awkward wave. “Joel. Ranger, Materia. Nice to meet you all.”

“And I’m Clive. Destroyer, Materia.” Clive looked more than a little hungover as he snapped out his response with a wince.

Corbin’s attention turned from the pair who would have the most trouble keeping up with this morning’s exercise to the final member of his unit, who he had met before.

The scarlet-haired Assassin offered Corbin a bemused smile as she shifted her hands from her hips and folded them around her slender waist. “Iris. Assassin, Materia,” she murmured in her usual seductive tone as her aqua-green eyes ran over Corbin’s damp shirt and leather pants. “Happy to be here.”

Clive and Joel glanced towards her with mingled interest and uncertainty while Clara rolled her eyes and sighed impatiently.

Beside Corbin, Milo cleared his throat as he stepped forward. “Nice to see some familiar faces. Captain Milo. Consultus, Destroyer.” He nodded to Clive. The younger man straightened as he regarded his senior curiously. “I’ll be observing today and offering advice when necessary to your Lieutenant.”

“Does our leader need a babysitter?” Vincent asked with unmasked uncertainty.

“No, he does not,” Milo replied sharply. “But since your unit has been selected to help escort refugees to Dawnskeep—” several members of the unit started at this news and glanced at each other worriedly, “—I decided to volunteer with today’s training to make sure that all of you use this time wisely to prepare.”

“Speaking of which,” Corbin murmured as he glanced over the group before him. “Aren’t we missing somebody? You said there were seven.”

Milo scanned the group again with a frown. “We are, aren’t we.”

“Oh, the Paladin,” Clara muttered with a scowl. “He went to the shitter.”

“Judging from the sound and smell,” Vincent muttered as he wrinkled his nose. “The Paladin might be in there for a while.”

Corbin rubbed his neck with a sigh as he turned to find Milo’s expectant gaze focused on him. ‘Right, I’m expected to get this unit into shape in two days.’

“Joel and Clive,” Corbin called out as he focused on the newest members of his unit. “Go round up our Paladin. If he’s too sick to participate in this morning’s exercise, then have him report to Sick Hall—”

“Ahh, actually,” Jade, the Earth Mage, stepped forward as she raised her hand. “Vincent can make all sorts of potions—I’m sure he could make an antidote to set Matthew right.”

‘So the Paladin’s name was Matthew.’ Corbin turned to the Water Mage, who was still studying the Lieutenant with an indecisive expression. “You’re an Alchemist?”

“I am,” Vincent replied neutrally. “I can make C-grade potions up to Greater quality.”

“Wow,” Joel murmured as he and several other members of the unit turned to regard the Water Mage with new respect. “Shouldn’t you be with the Alchemist Guild then?”

“I left for reasons of my own,” Vincent replied evasively.

“If you can already make C-grade potions, then why join the City Guard?” Clara asked with a frown.

“Because I still need to level to make higher-grade potions,” Vincent replied in a slightly defensive tone.

“And since the City Guard often patrol outside the city, Vincent can make use of those opportunities to gather the reagents he needs to master his craft,” Jade added with a look of admiration directed at the Water Mage.

“You could just pay the City Guard to collect them,” Clara muttered incredulously.

“And do you know how to collect the whispers of a Shadow Fern?” Vincent retorted with a disdainful glance at the young blonde Duelist.

“You make poisons then?” Iris interjected with sudden interest as Clara shot the Water Mage a reproachful glare.

“Poisons are part of Alchemy, so yes,” Vincent answered with a shrug.

‘Okay, Vincent’s a bit full of himself, but he has a lot of potential. Having him on hand for missions that require us to travel away from the city would certainly prove useful.’

“Does anyone else have any skills that might come in handy for the mission ahead?” Corbin asked curiously as he glanced over the group again.

Jade quickly raised her hand. “I’m a herbalist. I can identify pretty much any native plant in Orinthian and a few herbs found inside Gates and Dungeons as well. I often help Vincent with his potions.” She repeatedly glanced at the Water Mage as she spoke, but Vincent was either oblivious or pointedly ignoring her. “I also have [Earth Wall II] that I can use to build us shelters to sleep in while we travel. They won’t be strong enough to keep out any monsters over C-grade, but it would at least slow them down.”

Corbin nodded approvingly. “That will be very useful. Anyone else?”

Joel raised his hand timidly. “I suppose it's rather a given, but I’m a tracker.”

“Do you have [Hunter’s Perception]?” Clara asked doubtfully.

“N-no,” Joel shook his head. “But you don’t need a class skill to track animals or people.”

The Duelist scoffed scornfully.

“Don’t worry, Duelist,” Clive growled as he pinned the blonde with a withering gaze, “if you don’t think his skills are good enough, you don’t have to eat the meat he catches.”

“I don’t eat meat, so—” Clara flipped the Destroyer a finger.

“A fellow Vegetarian!” Jade exclaimed with a beaming smile. “How wonderful.”

“Well, for those who don’t mind a bit of meat,” Joel said as he glanced between the Duelist and Earth Mage. “Clive is an excellent cook.”

“Always useful,” Milo said with an approving nod. “Especially while traveling on the road.”

“What about you, Duelist?” Joel asked with a pointed look at Clara. “Any useful skills other than eating grass?”

“She can also run her mouth,” Clive muttered.

“I can also kick your ass, Destroyer,” Clara snarled.

Clive laughed as he turned squarely to face the shorter Feralis and looked down from his two feet height advantage. “I seriously doubt that grass eater.”

“What about the Assassin?” Jade asked, sparing Corbin from having to break up the unit's first fight. “What does she do?”

“You mean aside from killing people before they know I’m even there?” Iris replied with a scarlet smile as the long dark lashes over her aqua-green eyes fluttered seductively in Jade and Vincent’s direction.

Clara snorted and rolled her eyes again. “You’re a Materia like the rest of us. How good can your skills be at this rank?”

Iris shrugged and stretched her arms and chest provocatively as Joel and Clive stared on with admiration. “I prefer to keep the rest of my skills discrete,” the Assassin murmured as she twisted her waist from side to side and then moaned softly while she held a stretch.

“I’ll bet you do,” Jade muttered as she joined Clara in regarding their female teammate with evident dislike.

‘This is going to be a headache,’ Corbin mused, already ready to ditch his new unit for the day. “Alright, Joel and Clive, if you would—”

“Sorry!” A booming voice came up behind them as a man older than Vincent jogged towards the group holding his gut with one hand as he grimaced and fell in line beside Iris. The Assassin spun numbly and danced to the other side of Clive and Joel as she wrinkled her nose. “Hope I didn’t keep you waiting too long, Consultus.”

Corbin regarded the man he guessed to be in his thirties with a moment of confusion, then quickly shook his head. “You missed introductions—”

“Oh!” The man wiped a hand down his clammy face as he offered Iris a lopsided grin. “What a shame. Mathew Ferguson. Paladin, Materia.” He waved at the rest of the group, ignoring Clive and Joel as he focused on Iris and Clara before offering Vincent and Jade a nod of greeting. “What are we doing for this morning’s training, Consultus?”

‘Ferguson. That’s the family name of the Praefecti’s newest member, isn’t it? And is he—intentionally ignoring me—or does he really think Milo is the unit leader?’

“You’ll have to ask the Lieutenant,” Milo replied with a nod to Corbin. “I’m just along to stretch my legs.”

“Ohh, that sounds like another three-mile run,” Matthew murmured with another grimace as he pressed a hand to his stomach. “Not sure I have enough gas in the tank for that one, Consultus.”

“It will be six miles actually,” Corbin replied as he fixed his silver-gray eyes on the Paladin, who flinched and finally looked in his direction. “If you’re too sick to participate, then I expect you to check in at Sick Hall so they can record your illness and reason for missing training.” He turned to the Consultus beside him and added, “If they’re too sick to train, then it's probably best that they don’t take part in the escort mission to Dawnskeep.”

“Now hold up, Lieutenant!” Matthew snapped as he stepped forward. “I’ll still be able to participate in today’s patrols. I just ate something last night that disagrees with—” His face twisted suddenly into a painful expression before a loud unsettling brrrt filled the silence with a permeating stink that sent the unit recoiling away from the Paladin as if a Stinckshroom had exploded beneath his feet.

“I think he’s trying to poison us,” Iris muttered behind the fingers pinched to her nose.

“Why do his farts smell like a Gromulus’s asshole?” Joel protested behind the arm pressed over his face as the Ranger hid behind the Destroyer. Clive offered no comment as he held both hands over his nose and mouth and squinted at the Paladin in disgust.

“Where’s an Air Mage when you need one,” Jade muttered as she pulled two bushels of lilac from her pouch and handed one to Vincent while she waved the other in front of her face.

“Well—” Milo said stiffly from two feet behind Corbin, who refused to retreat as much as it physically pained him to breath standing this close to the Paladin, “—perhaps he should go to Sick Hall.”

“Lieutenant!” Vincent called out with a long-suffering sigh as he reached into his pouch and pulled out a dark purple potion bottle. “You asked for this?” Without waiting for a response, the Water Mage tossed the bottle to Corbin, who quickly stepped forward to catch it and swiftly presented it to Matthew.

“What?” the Paladin protested as he glanced from the bottle to Vincent. “I’m not poisoned.”

“It’s my own variation of an antidote,” Vincent replied from behind his mask of flowers. “Works just as well on food poisoning.”

“Drink this or head to Sick Hall and be dropped from this mission,” Corbin barked sharply and glared at the man until the Paladin finally accepted the potion, twisted the top off with practiced ease, and downed the ether remedy in a single gulp.

“You might want to send him back to the latrine now,” Vincent muttered as he retreated cautiously.

The rest of the unit looked sharply at the Water Mage, then at the Paladin, and scattered further away.

“What in Thana’s—festering cunny—did you give me?” Matthew groaned as he dropped the vial and doubled over painfully to clutch his stomach.

“I’d run to the latrine while you still can if I were you,” Milo suggested grimly from behind the scarf he held to his face.

The Paladin needed no further encouragement as he bolted back in the direction he had come while holding both hands to his ass cheeks.

Iris dropped her hand and laughed hysterically as the rest of the unit stared worriedly after the cursing Paladin.

Corbin shook his head at the Assassin and then turned narrowed eyes to Vincent. “Are you sure he’ll be alright?”

“Depends on how much crap he needs to get out of his system,” Vincent replied with a dismissive shrug.

“Then will he be able to participate in today’s training?”

“That’s rather doubtful,” the Water Mage replied as a faint smile tugged at the corner of his lips. “Matthew would have only slowed us down anyway.”

“Can we go now—please,” Clara interjected with a hint of desperation. “I’ll take a six-mile run any day over breathing that man’s farts.”

Corbin glanced uncertainly to Milo, who shrugged. The Guardian sighed. ‘Not exactly a great start, but we can’t waste anymore time.’

“Alright, let’s get going. We’ll take the southern trail through the Apple forest. Remember, if you see a monster maintain your distance and call for the patrol on duty, don’t fight it yourselves without armor or weapons.”

“That’s why it would make more sense to run in armor with our weapons,” Clive muttered as Corbin led the way to the Garrison’s back entrance.

“Shut it, you!” Clara snapped as she punched the Destroyer’s left arm. “Don’t go giving him any crazy ideas on our first day!”

“Hit me again, and I’ll lay you on your ass, Duelist.”

“Get a room, you two,” Vincent muttered as he shoved his way through the pair and jogged over to the exit with Jade close behind him.